New School Year

It was now the first week of March and I started my second year of high school. I ended up in a different class from Mina, Tasha, and Mara, and was relieved things turned out that way. It was always going to be this way because our school system puts students into different classes according to the level of their academic ability shown from the tests during the first year. Class 1 was where the top elites were, and my class was the bottom one, as expected. I felt a bit of schadenfreude though as it meant Tasha could not be in the same class with Mina. Well, but it changes nothing for me.

The first month or two passed uneventfully. I pulled myself together like I did the previous summer and focused on bettering myself. Exercises, guitar lessons, extra studying, and all that. Being physically fitter made me mentally stronger and happier too.

I only got a glimpse of Mina every now and then around the school. I did not actively avoid her but I did not seek her either. We still turned our eyes away when they met, but I unashamedly gazed at her when I saw her and she wasn't looking my way.

One day at the beginning of May, our homeroom teacher announced that this year's talent show would start taking applications, to be closed the next week. Of course, this made me nostalgic looking back at what happened the year before. Juno's no longer here but I could see Mina sing again if she were still in the band that is.

I did not give it much more thought than that, but one day while leaving the school I noticed a poster put up on the notice board.

"Guitarist URGENTLY wanted

Must be able to learn and play a new song in 1 month

Audition in the music room on Friday, 17:00"

I realized straight away that it was Mina's band. Something must have happened to their guitarist so they are looking for a replacement urgently. For a brief moment, I fantasized about playing in that band with Mina, practicing together, performing on the stage together, and maybe even having an after-party with the other band members too.

That would be awesome. But why am I kidding myself? I don't think I could do any of that naturally with Mina around, who still brought a pang in my heart every time I thought of her. On top of that, I've been playing the guitar for less than a year and I was nowhere near the level of their previous guitarist from the year before.

:Sigh:

I was so restless all the way back home and throughout the dinner. I knew it was silly and I had already told myself before that it wouldn't work at all, but I kept on imagining myself playing in the band with Mina. Why am I doing this to myself?

I'm just gonna run it off - I thought to myself and was getting changed into t-shirts and a tracksuit. I don't normally care what I put on when I go jogging, but for some reason today, the fading print on the t-shirts my mom got for me from a discount shop a long time ago caught my eye.

"If you change nothing, Nothing will change"

What's that even supposed to mean?

But in the spur of the moment I've decided to do the ridiculous.