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Nothing mattered to me anymore. I wasn't heartbroken. I was just numb.

I started to go to band practice again. I was welcomed back by everyone, and I was thankful nobody asked why I'd been away. Mina probably told them to just let it slide.

I applied myself hard to practice, and I felt like I was someone else while I was playing the guitar. But every time the practice was over, I became an empty shell again, an emotionless doll pulled by strings it could not control.

Of course, Mina sensed something too. But she did not pry into it. I knew she probably thought I got unhappy after seeing her and Tasha last time. She knew I still loved her. She knew it would have hurt me. But then again, Tasha is her girlfriend. What could she do? She can't tell her girlfriend to stay away from her because it might hurt someone else's feelings.

After about two weeks of going through motions like this, we were ready to play. We had our final practice the day before the talent show and closed the day feeling confident that we will do well on the big day.

And that day finally came, the day of the talent show.

It brought back so many memories, but surprisingly, the memory that stuck with me the most was Mina singing on the stage, not the drama that followed.

Maybe it's just a way our psyche trying to protect itself. Discard the bad things, and remember the good things.

And the memory of Mina's performance last year was a beautiful one.

If we could replicate that today - without a freak of nature like Juno - we are sure to win.

"It's our turn next girls", Sara was rallying the troops together.

"Everybody's ready?"

"Yeah!"

"Nana?", Sara called me.

"Yeah"

"Are you ready?"

"Yes"

"Good. Let's do this"

The announcer gave a short introduction of our band to the audience and invited us onto the stage. We were greeted with thunderous applause and it seemed Mina became a bit of a star since the last show, with not a small number of boys chanting her name.

Sara and the rest of the band didn't seem to mind though. Everyone in this band was relaxed and didn't fuss about who was getting attention and who was not. It was accepted that the lead singer will always be in the spotlight, but it was a team effort and nobody had any doubts about it.

At the same time, I could feel some people whispering among themselves, probably something along the line of "what is Nanaka doing there?". Those were probably the ones from my class last year. My dark days. I had to swallow a bitter smile thinking that my days haven't gotten any brighter despite all my effort.

It was hard, but this is just how things were meant to be.

The song we were gonna perform today wasn't easy, not for Mina.

It started with her singing the chorus in acapella first before moving on to the instrumental intro and then the verse. The hard part was that if she gets the starting pitch slightly wrong, the whole thing will be thrown off once the instruments come in - out of tune.

We had faith in her though. She's shown time and time again in practice she can do it.

When we were ready on stage. Mina stood in the center in front of the microphone composedly. She didn't say anything this time and just waited for the crowd to quiet down, which they did very soon.

Once I heard her singing voice, I felt a strong pang in my heart that I have forgotten for a long time. She was pulling the strings of my heart with her words. This love song wasn't easy for me and all the memories came back, both sweet and bitter.

I was playing in a melancholic trance and her every word was eating up my broken heart piece by piece. I was overcome with emotions and felt nauseous.

I managed to pull myself through the performance, but as soon as the song ended with Mina's repeat of the first verse in acapella again, she looked over to me at the last note and her eyes saw right through my heart.

Then I collapsed on the stage, with my last memory being Mina running over to me screaming something I could not make out.