render weak

Ive pov

I was completely caught off guard by my own reaction to my lips barely brushing hers. It only happened all in three seconds. The touch and the punch. It was as if an electron brushed against a proton. A beautiful fusion.

"Aaahh-"she hissed spitefully to hold in her anger, giving me a venomous look.

All I could do was stare for a moment. It would be a lie if I said her haughtiness didn't peeve me to a certain degree. My little member hardened.

Plus, her scent made my mind foggy. She smelled so enticing, sweetness on her skin, so fragrant. I had never been kissed. It was much like my first kill. My heartbeat was a loud thump. My blood gushed and pumped dramatically inside. It left me with an appetite that wouldn't be satisfied as though I had been given a small taste of something delicious. The sweet taste in my mouth vanished the moment she pulled away from me.

And I'm craving more. I was baffled by her reaction to me. Do I have a contagious disease? Why would she pull away feeling disgusted and repulsed? For some reason, a pain tugged my heart. But she didn't appear eager to get away from Noah. His tongue. His fucking tongue had touched her. She allowed it for the whole six seconds before she pulled away with clenched fists. The impact of the blow she delivered to my face left her mouth agape, shocked by what she had just done. She stood, with her stern cold expression mode on, unable to utter a word as if she would collapse from fear from what I would do to her in return for this punch.

I'm young, I look fine, I don't lack money, many girls tried to throw themselves at me. But with her, it seemed as if I was the one throwing myself at her. The complete opposite.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

I stood, still staring at her wondering what I could possibly do to make myself more appealing to her. It was frustrating. Why do I even need her attention? The gun is in my pocket itself. Why can't I kill her just yet? Because I'm not supposed to. Geez I hate this. My little brother had hardened.

I wanted her to fall and whimper in pain. When she was looking at me with those blue eyes, the desire of rendering her helpless and hopeless ignited. Yet, I still hadn't pushed her. I hadn't made her cry. I was feeling out of my element as I realized she was making me weak. My skin felt flushed. I was enraged at how much control she had over me. My phone vibrated, interrupting me from my daze as I blinked. I walked past her into the bathroom with my phone still buzzing.

I definitely need a cold bath.

🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

When I came back into the room, she was no longer here fortunately. I bet Alpha was sitting outside by the door. I can't afford having her inside. Last time I woke up at night, I could have killed her. There she was, sitting by the door to ensure I was fine.

"Alpha, dismissed! Go enjoy"

I caressed her coat fondly.

"My good girl. My big cat"

She closed her eyes while I was brushing her ears.

She was disgusted when Noah had touched her as well. She only had that apartment mate in her mind and heart. I was confused. Was my theory making sense?

I tucked the corners of my bed sheet neatly. I threw the broken pieces of her phone in the bin. I showered. The knot in my stomach grew with each step to the kitchen. But by the time I reached, it was uncomfortable as hell. It made me sick to look at her everyday, especially today after being this intimate with someone, with her.

Comforting smell of fresh coffee penetrated my nostrils. Coffee always sent my brain happy impulses. It eased my mind. Before me appeared the figure of Miss Sergeant... Chipmunk is better... struggling with a frying pan. A formless liquid resembling a failed pancake attempt.

Arnold was surely out with Alpha for a walk and to play. She enjoyed being outside by the sea. Chuckling to myself, I stared at her. Her face, disappointed and a bit exhausted probably from all the useless struggle. Some strands of her smooth hair glued to her forehead and neck from the sweat and humidity around the stove. I wanted to get a better view of her face. Her lips slightly parted as she appeared pensive and irritated.

Finally, she removed the pan from the stove. It was thrown in the sink along with its contents. She looked pitiful.

Cute

Is this deranged woman perhaps seducing me?

She was looking then and so seductive right now with her hair stuck on her face and she was also sweating which made her look more sensual. The one who had calmed down earlier hardened again. How could I not react to such a scene?

Things that I hate about her;

She stands up to me, she was boring.

She doesn't dread me, she was really boring.

Before I realized it, I was already standing there next to her. She handed me a large cup of coffee as I stared at her. I noticed the handcuff pale reddish mark on her wrist. I looked elsewhere. After slurping a sip of the liquid, I guessed it was not up to my taste. It was very bitter. It tastes somehow like medicine. I noticed the drink had a deep nutty aftertaste to it. It was the worst coffee I had ever drank. To be more precise, maybe she forgot to add sugar. I couldn't help thinking if it was on purpose to extract her revenge? I trailed her gaze to my arm which was covered with tattoos. They were visible underneath my t-shirt.

"Can you get me some clothes?" her voice smoothly sounded so sweet in my ears. I despised it. I wanted to choke it out of her.

My anger simmered under the surface. My fingers itched to rip her to shreds and it took all of my restraints to distract myself and swallow my urges. Then, I remembered how Noah was stripping her naked through his lustful gazes. I felt my hands shaking from anger.

"Why can't you wear mine? You can't order me around. I'm not your friend" I gritted my teeth.

"You realise anything can happen to brave girls like you"I resumed.

There was venom in my words. Usually people would cower away from me but she stood there, glaring at me. If she wasn't convinced I was bad, she should have known it by now. It was a clear warning for people to stay away. Her fight or flight hormones are certainly faulty.

"Just because I'm your captive doesn't mean I don't have the right to basic human rights which include clean clothing" she snapped at me.

I breathed deeply, attempting to calm myself deep down but the rage inside grew with each passing second. I've come to realise one thing about her. She would not shied away if she was pissed at someone. Her ego and her anger triggered her confidence level.

Another thing to add to the list;

She has a despicable taste in coffee.

She shrugged people off when she was pissed off.

Her anger gets hold of her.

She was crazily boring.

There was something wrong with her. I came to my own conclusion. Both of us sat across the table. I was surprised when a simple 'fine' escaped my lips. She rolled her eyes. Confirmed. Something is definitely wrong with her. Did she just roll her eyes at me?

Can I just drag my knife across her pale ivory skin? As the crimson blood would trickle over... I can't wait to watch in satisfaction. It's insane how this excited me... I wasn't in the correct mindset. I felt dizzy and it was pissing me off. I couldn't recognize the foreign feeling inside of me which was so hard to ignore. The unfamiliar emotions blooming were controlling my every cell. I am not supposed to kill her. My fingers clenched hard around the knife. I pulled out my knife the next moment.