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Anaya

today I wanted to be free and feel happy

all the while working and getting myself busy , I tried to push his thoughts away but the more I tried , the more I wanted him .

I kissed a total stranger today and lord have mercy on me , I hated it the next very second .It was like I was cheating on myself.

And to make the night even worse I didn't get my periods yet .It was supposed to be yesterday and I thought it will happen but no .It didn't.

Birth controlling pills might not work .Tina got pregnant likely but me ?

The thought about pregnancy is ripping my mind .What if Edward thinks I'm doing this on purpose to make him stay .He left and I don't know when he will be back .

Will he be back ?

I don't know

What will I tell him ?

He will think I'm an con artist , gold digger anything.

It's my fault .

I should check, what If its positive.

I should go get the kit first , oh god please .

I don't want this , what if he hates me if this becomes true ?