You're a woman, I'm a machine

I shake the hands of the several dignitaries from the Health and Environment Ministry. I congratulate them on their achievement. Afterwards I head to the bar. In a satin silver dress, Rosa sits at a stool at the bar.

"You look stunning tonight." I say.

"Really?" Rosa says as she turns words me with a frown.

"Would you have preferred a utility belt as an accessory?"

She smiles.

"You know me. All. Too. Well."

I take a seat. She begs the bartender and orders a glass of water for me.

"Is this your attempt to know me all too well?" I ask as while she dangles her wine in her elegant glass.

"I do." She says shrugging my question off.

"It would appear so." I say as I take a sip of water and rest my head on my index and thumb.

"Ah, there she is," I follow her gaze to the blonde-haired girl I talked to earlier. The girl's currently locked in a conversation. "She was all over you a while ago, you looked two seconds away from jetsoning out of the conversation, all dreary eyed as you get – I'd soon find out I was next on her list. Chatted my ear off about synthetic animal reproduction and all that." I stare at Rosa puzzled with a faint smile on my lips as she rolls her eyes then takes a sip of her glass.

"You know…if I were to marry you, which would seem to be the case, we would have to attend a lot of these together.

"Mm." She responds, drowning the rest of her glass.

A ring, in a veil, lifted, a kiss. I wonder if her cold demeanor would be softened by the journey of raising a child. If I could hold her in Citadel and look ahead into the falling artificial sun, with the words 'I love you' etched on her tongue. An idle dream.

I let out a cough, that racks me a bit harder than I expected. I take a sip of water before smiling and saying.

"If I were to ask you to marry me now, what would be your response?"

Her body freezes up and her brows furrow. She says nothing for a while except just sitting there. Confused, I gesture her to proceed.

"Are you really about to ask me?" She says with her trademark condescending tone.

"No." I say flatly, "I was just wondering-"

"I panicked," She says chuckling, "I thought you were about to ask."

"Why?"

"You're all sweaty and angsty."

"It's the temperature. The room's filled with hot air." I lie and gesture to the blonde-haired girl. She shifts in her chair.

"You know I told you that I wouldn't want to be married now…I care for you a lot but – to be taken from my home, my parents," she gestures around her, "my work. Only for you to use me and rip my child from my womb, is something I might want in the future but not necessarily right now."

I frown.

"I think ripped is a bit much," I tease, "and what's this about your child?"

"Besides," she begins, "you can be quite irritable sometimes."

I gesture her to continue.

"Yes, quite irritable. One moment your that charismatic Nova who I've always known, then the next, you're in a red eyed haze. And it's normally sparked by when we talk about The Praxis Laws. You'd think I was the one from Citadel with how many times I've corrected you. One would think you were letting me win." I scuffle in my seat. She looks me dead in the eye for a beat before saying, "there it is, right there…red eyed haze, on queue."

I ignore her and lay my empty glass on the table. I clench my jaw for a brief moment. That condescending tone pumped up with pompous arrogance…yet again. As much as she infuriates me sometimes, I know better than to entertain this conversation with Rosa, so I don't. She lets out a slight sigh before changing the subject.

"I heard about what happened at the fun fare yesterday," She says, "the whole Luca situation seems…unfair."

"Blown out of proportion if you ask me. I called Cassian today and tried explaining the situation to him, I felt ashamed to do so because, I don't know…I-I felt quite horrid for some time. I don't know, I felt I should've told him sooner. He dismissed me saying I was acting silly. He said it doesn't matter as long as I told me. If something like that happened to a close friend, I would want to know as soon as possible – the first to know. Is that not what friendship is for, if I can't depend on you on my darkest hour…" I don't even know what I'm saying at this point. She stands up straighter and luckily sweeps the convo back up by saying,

"Well, a friend of a friend, who knows a friend in the Safety and Security Ministry told me that he might be released tomorrow."

I turn towards her.

"But you didn't hear it from me."

I make a mental note to visit him as soon as he gets released, he can explain what's going on with me. With a gentle perky tap before paying for her drink, she turns towards me and puts her hand to my head and says.

"You're burning up. You don't look too well. Is everything ok-"

I fan her off and tell her I'm fine. She smiles before lazily saying,

"Good, because I'm not." She picks up her purse, "Mind dropping me off at HEM?"

***

The Health and Environment Ministry after hours looks hauntingly empty. We move past silent passage ways in the office block building. When we eventually get to her office, she's sober enough to take her key card out and lazily slam it on the scanner. Prompting the door to slide open. The room slowly illuminates, and she throws her handbag on the desk before taking off her high heels.