Chapter 10 - Monster

[JANE]

I was just silent as we headed back to the car. Jey must have noticed my silence after she loaded the groceries into the trunk.

"Are you alright?" she asked curiously.

"I can't believe Khali thinks I'm dating you in the middle of the day," I grumbled as I slipped my phone into my pocket.

"What? Seriously? I'm sorry. But really, she's a nice person. It's just that after that—uhm—I don't know if I'm in the position to tell you about it, but let's say, there's something happened before that made her lose her trust in everyone. She's quite skeptical of everything, and she hates when someone humiliates her or someone looks down on her. She hates that," Jey explained.

"It's normal to be skeptical of things, but she's just too much! Anyway, this is just for a week; this will be over soon," I said and did not speak anymore. Jey must have sensed that I didn't want to talk, so she turned on the stereo – playing Ariana Grande and Justin Bieber's song "Stuck with you." That didn’t help because that only reminded me more of Khali. But no need to tell Jey about that. We reached their building and parked the car in the parking space. Jey helped me to carry the groceries. I already bought everything I needed, including the food I will be preparing for the following days.

We went up, and Jey swiped the card to open Khali's door. Khali was sitting on the couch, staring at us blankly.

"Dude, I just helped Jane to buy groceries," Jey instantly explained.

Khali didn't say anything. She merely stared at her best friend coldly. What the heck is her problem?

"Why are you staring at me like that?" Jey asked, a little confused with how Khali responded.

"Whatever. Just cook some food then after that wash my clothes. I can see some dust on the floor; clean that off," she said, not even minding Jey's question before standing up and returning to her room.

"I'll take that, Jey. Thank you so much for your assistance," I said with a smile.

"That's nothing; if you need anything, just come to me," she beamed as she walked out the door. I groaned and walked over to the table to arrange the bags on the shelves. I instantly remembered what Jey had said to me in the car. There's something that happened to Khali before? I'm not sure what that is; it must be horrible for her to turn into a monster. Look at how she treats me; it's absurd. She thinks she has complete control over everything. She's a control freak, which comes as no surprise to me.

I was startled when I felt a presence behind me. When I turned around, I saw Khali. I exhaled loudly and clenched my chest. Jesus!

"How was your date? Did you have fun?" she asked mockingly. I merely gave her a grimace and remained silent. I'm too tired to dispute with her. I ignored her and started to take the groceries out of the bag, but I gasped when Khali yanked me by the waist, crushing my body against hers. She looked at me with her piercing gaze and tightened her grip on me, but not to the point of hurting me.

"Another rule, if I ask you something, you must answer me," she muttered in a low voice.

"Y-yes. I mean, no. I just asked Jey to help me buy the groceries because I don't know how," I answered nervously. I could see her gazing down on my lips, and that made me even nervous. Please, not this again. Control yourself, Jane.

"Is this your way to piss me off?" she asked, stroking her fingers down my cheek to my chin. Her touch made me shiver. I had to bite my lower lip and hold my breath to stop my chest from heaving up and down. She's making me breathless.

"Well, guess what? It's working, and I'm serious about what I told you that night."

My knees wobbled as she placed her lips near my ear. I unconsciously grasped her shirt as her lips brushed across my neck. It took all of my strength to shove her away.

"No!" I shouted. She then smirked at me, and I was left panting.

"You are my slave. Don't forget that," she murmured as she walked away.

"Shit!” I cursed and slumped down on the floor.

I hate how she makes me feel weak. I just felt my tears running down my cheeks. I hate her! I hate her so much! I wiped my tears and tried to stand up. I shouldn't be affected by her. She's the danger I must overcome. She's not going to bring any good to me.

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[KHALI]

You're probably wondering why I am like this? Why did I do that to Jane? I must be crazy, a moron, and a monster. People may perceive me as a bad person, and I will not refute this. She reminds me of the person I despise the most. There's some kind of resemblance between them, with her attitude, her looks, and even the situation of how we met. I know Jane is a different person, but I couldn't help to think that they were almost the same.

Carmine, that's her name. That girl ruined me, crushed every piece of me, every ounce of pride I had, every bit of love I had, till I forgot how to care and love. Jey was well aware of my circumstances. She was there when I was at the pinnacle of my happiness, and she was there when I was at the bottom when I didn't even know how to get up. That time when I was on the verge of killing myself. Carmine Crea fucking ruined everything. Jane Terranova reminds me of her, and I'm not sure how to keep my rage in check. I want to torture her and make her feel the pain. I must be crazy because she's Jane and not Carmine.

But I think I'm insane for liking how her body pressed against mine, how her scent tingles my senses, and how her little gasps and short breathing affects my entire existence. But the need to inflict pain on her keeps me from being carried away. I hate her, yet I enjoy having her around, especially when she's close to me. I despise that feeling. It must be lust. It's far from any kind of love or affection because I know that I can't give that to anyone. In the first place, I have nothing to give. I had to leave her there before I could get carried away. I walked towards my room, averting my eyes.

My phone rang as soon as I entered my room, it was Jey. I can never be mad at my best friend. She's one of the most important people in my life, and she's the only one who understands what I'm going through. She's the only one who cares about me. I wore my AirPods before answering her call.

"Hello, dude," I spoke.

"Dude, are you mad?” She sounded worried. I sighed and shook my head as if she could see me before responding, "No."

I heard her sigh and chuckled in relief.

"Dude, I don't have any bad intentions back there; she just asked for my help; she doesn't even know to buy groceries or even order online," she explained.

"It's okay. Sorry, it was just crazy earlier. Don't mind me. You going with me later?” I asked, changing the topic since it's not even a big deal.

"At the casino?"

As I perched on the edge of my bed, I grinned broadly and said, "Yeah, if you want to come. You know, girls will be hanging out there."

"How about Jane," she asked.

"Well, she'll be busy doing housework here," I muttered.

"Isn't that a little much? It's almost evening; give her a break," she replied.

"All right," I said, no longer debating with her. The last thing I want is for Jey and me to get into a fight over that girl.

"Let her come; I'll ask Reese to come so she won't be bored," I can sense her smile from here.

"Reese?” I cocked my brows and set my gaze on the clock placed on my bedside table, which reads 5 p.m.

"Yeah. I'm going to ask her out. I like her," I can tell that Jey is serious about this girl who looks like a chipmunk. Come to think of it, I remember Jane was looking for a chipmunk that night. It must be her best friend. That realization made me laugh a little.

It’s funny how my best friend can easily fall in love with someone she barely knows; that’s why I'm always looking after her because I don't want her to end up like me. The thing about being not able to love is that – you're already contented to see the people around you falling in love, and you wonder, maybe love isn't for you, and it's just for them. Because when you let your feelings get you, everything will be fucked up. Everything irrational, becomes rational for you, and who knows, what’s the craziest thing that could happen?

The worst part? It's when your entire life revolves around her, and she finally becomes your universe, and when you lose her, all hell breaks loose. That's the end.

"Just be careful, dude. You barely even know that person," I reminded her.

"Don't worry. I know my boundaries," she assured me.

"Okay"

I decided to leave my room to see how Jane was doing. She's already preparing a meal. I could smell kimchi from where I was standing. Jane is wearing an apron, and weirdly, it looks good on her. She turned to the kitchen counter to cut some onion chives, but she stopped when she noticed me. I immediately crossed my arms and smirked at her.

"That smells delicious," I replied as I approached her. I can see how she gulps and becomes a little nervous. That's right. I'd like her to get the impression that I'm not someone she should mess with.

"I'm almost done cooking," she said monotonously. "You can just sit there while I finish everything."

"Feed me," I told her.

"What?” She blurted out while furrowing her brows. Her voice was furious, and I sniggered.

"I said feed me," I repeated.

She sneered and then hissed before she looked away, looking pissed. I took a seat and looked at her with my brows raised.

"What? That food won't get to my mouth on its own," I sarcastically remarked. She then gave me a phony smile and proceeded to pile the kimchi rice onto the plate. I opened my mouth with a mischievous smile. I want to see how she gets mad, how badly she wants to scream at my face, but of course, she won't do that. She can't do that.

She took the spoonful of rice and fed me. I hummed in response the moment I tasted it. Not bad, she knows how to cook.

"Hmmm.. that's good," I said and smirked at her. She rolled her eyes and sighed heavily.

"You have your hands; you can just feed yourself," she muttered, not even looking at me.

I grabbed her chin and forced her to look at me.

"No, I like the look in your eyes, the way you hate me while falling in love with me."

She then mocked and laughed aloud, yanking my hand away from her.

"That's the most absurd thing I've ever heard."

"Fall for you? Only in your dreams; you're the worst person I've ever met; no one will ever fall for you; you're a monster," she spat words at me. I gritted my teeth, observing her actions. She loathed me so much, and I want to see more. Aside from anger, I want to see despair.

"Can you get me some water?" I told her calmly. She breathed out, clearly attempting to contain her rage before she stood up.

"You'll come with me to the casino tonight; Jey and your best friend will be there," I muttered.

"Reese?" she asked, her expression changing slightly.

"Yes, Miss Fatico will be there," I answered before standing up. "But remember, don't take any drink from strangers; the last thing I want to do is clean up your mess again."

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[JANE]

"Why do you hate me so much?” I asked her before she could even leave. She turned her gaze on me and stared at me impassively.

"You knew I was drugged on that day, and I told you I'm sorry. I agreed to be your slave because I’m sincere with my apology. I didn't mean that to happen," I felt the lump on my throat, and I had to pause because I felt like I was going to break down in front of her. I didn't want to give her the satisfaction of succeeding in making me suffer in front of her.

"Because I hate the likes of you," she answered. I tried to find any remorse in her expression but couldn't find any.

I hissed and swallowed the lump in my throat. I have to fight back.

"I know you have been hurt before; I don't know who or what hurt you but I'm not like—“

"What did you say?" She cut me off, she sounded enraged, and I felt terrified. She laughed scornfully, and I had to step back when she started walking towards me. My heart started to race due to nervousness.

"What do you know about me? Huh?” she asked as she grabbed both of my arms and dragged me closer to her. I whimpered as she tightened her grasp on my arm.

"You're hurting me," I told her. I winced when she tightened it more painfully.

"You don't know anything about me, so stop acting like you know how I feel," she said angrily, her jaw clenching and her grasp on my arms tightening. It hurts. Tears streamed down my cheeks, and I couldn't help but whimper.

"Stop," I begged her. She was panting as she pierced me with her gaze. I was already trembling. She loosened her grip on me and blinked a few times before letting me go. I sank to the floor, my palm covering my face. I'm scared of her. There's a moment of silence, and only my sniffles and cries could be heard. Then, I heard her faint footsteps walking away from me. She's the worst. She's a monster.