19 - ZARA

ONE MONTH LATER

"Are you ready?" Fizz asked, heaving his chest.

I nodded feebly in response.

It had been a month since I confronted Luca, and he shot himself. I'd spent the last month hating myself, despising myself, crying myself to sleep every night.

Wishing that it was me in his place.

He'd been on life support at the hospital for a month, and I'd been praying non-stop for the past month, just hoping that he would pull through.

Just hoping that he would make it out alive.

God knows, if he didn't…

I would shoot myself and bury myself along with him.

***

Me and Fizz arrived at the hospital, making our way to the ward where Luca was being held. I could feel my heart hammer against my chest as I made my way to the glass window, seeing him lying there wearing an oxygen mask, with machines beeping next to him.

Knowing that this was all my fault.

I'd pushed him too far…

Made him relive his nightmares.

If it wasn't for me…

This wouldn't be fucking happening.

I made my way into the room, tears streaming down my cheeks as I stared at him. The bandaged up wounds.

He'd lost so much blood…

So much fucking blood.

I crouched down next to his bed, gently laying my head against his body.

Sobbing against him.

I took his hand in mine, kissing his fingers, kissing his palms.

Knowing that he couldn't feel it…

But just needing to make known how much I loved him.

"I'm so sorry, Luca…" I whispered. "I'm so sorry."

Tears continued to roll down my cheeks uncontrollably, and I couldn't stop them.

"Fizz told me everything. I know you didn't kill my sister. I know you did everything you possibly could to avenge her. That one of the other bastards in your team did it. I know you were fucked-up for a long time about it. Beating yourself up about what happened…" I trailed off my sentence, heaving my chest. "When it wasn't even your fault in the first place."

Another tear rolled down my cheek.

"You didn't kill your father, baby. I know it was an accident. I know you didn't mean to. I'm sorry I was so insensitive. I'm sorry I didn't hear you out, or give you the chance to explain yourself. I'm sorry for making you feel so terribly about yourself, for making you relive all of the terrible fucking shit that happened, when all you've ever done… Is love me. Care for me. Adore me."

I sniffed, wiping my eyes, feeling like my heart was being burnt alive, as I continued to stare at Luca.

"I don't think you're a monster, Luca. Far from it. I said some things that I didn't mean. I said things without knowing the truth. Without knowing the full picture. And guess what, Luca? My feelings towards you haven't changed in the slightest. I still love you. I still love you so fucking much, it hurts. I've been hating myself for what you did. For causing you so much pain to the point you fucking shot yourself. I'll never forgive myself for letting it come to this. Fuck, Luca. I can't live without you. Please don't give up on me."

I continued to sob, hardly able to keep myself upright, my vision going hazy from my eyes being fogged with tears.

"We were supposed to spend the rest of our lives together," I mourned. "Grow old together, have kids together. Travel together. London, Paris, Tokyo, New York. The whole world. Be successful together. I love you Luca. Please…"

I slowly bent down, pressing my lips to his forehead. Feeling utterly and completely at loss.

My tears fell onto his face, but I didn't care. I was tired of keeping my emotions bottled up. I was tired of pretending to be strong, when inside, I was broken.

And Luca was the only man who was capable of fixing me.

"Growing old and having kids, eh?" came a low voice.

My eyes widened in shock, hardly able to believe my ears.

It felt like my heart had stopped beating.

I slowly moved my body upwards, to see that Luca's eyes had opened. I could feel my entire body convulsing, so thankful to God.

So thankful for this fucking miracle.

He was alive…

He was going to make it…

And I couldn't be more fucking grateful.

My heart felt so full…

It felt like I was going to explode.

"Oh my God, Luca…" I sobbed.

He slowly got up, sitting upright on the bed, pulling his mask off from his face.

"Fuck, Luca, don't do that. You're not fully mended yet. You'll hurt yourself!" I yelled.

He let out a low chuckle. "All I know is I wanna kiss you right now. It's been a long fucking time, baby girl."

I scoffed, shaking my head at his idiocy. He'd just come out of a coma, and the first thing on his mind was putting his mouth on mine.

Horny little bastard. Who would I be to deny his wishes?

I leant over to him, gently sitting on his lap, taking his face into my hands, showering his face with kisses. Not being able to kiss him enough. Wanting to make the most of this moment. Needing to be sure that this was definitely happening. Needing to be sure that this was definitely real.

Needing him to know just how much I loved him.

I slid my tongue into his mouth, inching closer to him, tangling my fingers into his hair. Moaning against him.

Fuck, how I'd missed his mouth.

"Mm, baby," he groaned. "I love you. I fucking love you."

"I love you too," I whispered. "So much. More than you could ever know."

He let out a low chuckle. "You're not getting rid of me that easily."

I giggled against him, stroking his face. "I wouldn't have it any other way."

"Fuck." He kissed me harder. "Marry me, Zara. Marry me."

I trembled, kissing him back with just as much urgency.

Just as much passion.

Just as much lust…

Just as much love.

"Yes, I'll marry you," I whispered, tears sliding down my cheeks.

Knowing that there was no other person I would rather spend my happily ever after with.

The end of my story.

Me being the Beauty…

Luca Costello being my Beast.

THE END

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