I walk out just to have a fresh hair and some peace when I saw something unexpected; Which I shouldn't have just seen that, Noah and the girl I know were "Kissing" in a dark corner where everyone would not see them
As That Happened, I stared at him and he was like having fun to what he was doing; It breaks my heart then I walk away when my tears suddenly drop non-stop, I don't understand my emotions about that and It's like a mix of rage and sad
While I was crying, Ashley were looking for me so she had to go out then suddenly saw me crying; She was shocked on why I was crying and she were concern about it, I lied to her cause I didn't anyone want to know about what happened
(At My House), I quickly run to the bathroom to let my tears out because I couldn't hold it anymore and I keep getting flashbacks about it; It feels like your being stabbed on the stomach or being choked, It was uncomfortable and I couldn't stop whining
I washed myself and get ready to bed, then I notice the beautiful moon on my balcony; I went to the balcony and sit, Just watching the beautiful moon and getting flashbacks on my thoughts about him and then I started to talk myself
"Whyy, Why would you go out there to know that he has been going out with another girl?", I said
"And saw the horrible shit and they had to kiss", I sob
"Maybe it's time to move on from him, Letting go of things; My damn problem", I said
"Like why would I keep bumping into him if he's not into me, Oh right nobody even cares to people who are LGBTQ", I said
I cried so hard then chosing the hardest decision in my life...
"Welp, If he's ignoring me then I'll ignore him too; I don't got time about this bullshit, There are a lot of men out there", I said
I won't forget that night like who wouldn't forget it
(THE NEXT DAY)
I did all my best to stay away from him but not doing it obviously, I try to ignore him and challenge myself to not miss him and It was pain
I don't know how longer I can keep my feelings to him....