Waking Feelings

-----Fabian's POV

I'm not sure when, but Ilfa ended up passing out in our embrace. We didn't bother to untie the curtains that hang around the bed so the light from the windows makes it quite difficult for me to get some sleep; but that's not all.

Having Ilfa this close to me feels unbelievably soft, but that's mainly due to her breasts pressing up against me. Sure it would be the same with Rina, but not to this extent. Also, the smell that Ilfa's giving off is too relaxing, and combine that with how warm and soft her body is, I don't think I have it in me to get up and untie those curtains. I guess I'll just wait till night time or if Ilfa decides to wake up.

But suddenly, a knock comes from outside the door, causing me to tighten up involuntarily, bringing Ilfa's body even closer to my own.

?: "Sister."

Then, the door opens. Ilfa doesn't look to be budging one bit as her arms remain firmly wrapped around my body; there's no escape...

Tarifa: "Huh? You?"

Fabian: "U-uhm."

What am I suppose to say here?! Tarifa is not only Ilfa's clone, but also her second in command. There's also the fact that Tarifa has never said anything remotely nice to me so all I can say is just some random noises as I try and figure out a way to not die in this situation.

Tarifa: "Hahh~ I figured."

She walks up to the left side of the bed as our eyes lock on with one another as Ilfa's back is now facing her.

Fabian: "This wasn't my-"

Tarifa: "I know."

Wait. Did Tarifa just smile there? It was subtle, but the tone of her voice doesn't seem overly aggressive.

Tarifa: "I was worried about what was wrong with her. She's been acting rather strange lately. But seeing her sleeping so peacefully like this. Thank you, Fabian."

Fabian: "W-what?"

Now she's thanking me? This is so weird!

Tarifa: "Pfft. I always wondered why sister took a liking to you, and to be honest, I still don't see it. but for sister to lower her defenses like this and even let a powerful mage like yourself hold her that close. She must put quite a lot of trust in you."

Is she implying that I could kill Ilfa right now if I wanted? That's-

Fabian: "I'd never do that. Ilfa's not some monster to be killed off simply for what she is. Sure it might've started somewhat forcefully, but she always put my needs over hers. She's... Kind."

Tarifa: "Hmm? You call her by her name?"

Fabian: "Of course."

Tarifa: "Interesting. You know. No one even dares to say her name in her presence. You're right, she is kind. But that's because she sees everyone as a friend. But no matter how hard she tries, she just can't deal with the consequences that comes with her power. It's thanks to her power that everyone puts her at a certain distance, despite Ilfa just wanting friends."

Woah. Is Tarifa going on about what Ilfa was talking about before? Ilfa mentioned that she was alone before all of this happened, but I figured all of that was resolved now that she has the dark elves and the other species with her. But maybe I was naïve in thinking that.

Tarifa: "So for you, despite being a human and someone we prey upon, to let her in like this. It makes me happy."

Fabian: "...You're her clone right? So don't you also feel the desire to connect with others?"

Tarifa: "Oh? Sister told you about that?"

Shoot. Was I too careless right there? Maybe I shouldn't have- 

Tarifa: "Well, sure I was born out of the desire to connect with someone, but that was fulfilled when I met her. Personally, I have no intentions to bring anyone else up to our level."

Fabian: "So then, why are you happy with me?"

Tarifa: "It's what sister wanted the most. Sure it somewhat sickens me having you be like this with her, but I can't argue that I'm more delighted to see that Ilfa finally found someone to bond with."

Bond with... Just then, Ilfa tighten her grasp around me as if her body is subconsciously reacting to her sisters words.

Tarifa: "Heh, anyways. Tell her that the cleanup of the humans have been dealt with when she wakes up."

Fabian: "Uh, yes. Will do."

Tarifa: "Alright. See you."

She then took her leave, closing the door behind her in a gentle manner as to not wake up Ilfa. I end up breathing a sigh of relief. To think that Tarifa had a soft side to her like that. But I guess that's reserved only for Ilfa... Even now, Tarifa still would prefer me gone if it weren't for Ilfa wanting me by her side.

As I think that, I brush through Ilfa's hair once more as I can now pay attention to her soft breaths as she sleeps. I like to think that Tarifa knows exactly what's going on with Ilfa, especially when she first walked in. She wasn't the least bit surprised that I was with Ilfa. So maybe Ilfa's the only one that doesn't know herself?

.....

...

I'm not sure how much time had past, but the sunlight coming into the room has started to die down a bit. I figured now would be the time to maybe get some sleep, but-

Ilfa: "Mm-mmm~"

It was then that Ilfa shuffled about, making some cute moans before her eyes finally opened in a slow manner.

Fabian: "Good morning."

Ilfa: "Mmm? Morn- Huh? Fabian?!"

Did she forget that she fell asleep on me? I take a moment to tighten my arms around her, letting her know that yes, she did sleep with me.

Fabian: "See? You managed to sleep with me."

Ilfa: "I... I didn't mean to sleep on you... I'm sorry."

Fabian: "It's fine. I enjoyed you sleeping against me. Reminded me of-"

Just then, I remember the time when Ilfa and I were, doing "those" things together. I guess the only real times we were this close was when we were going to do that. Which is why having her like this was such a nice breath of fresh air.

Ilfa: "Hmm? Remind you of what?"

Fabian: "J-just when we. When we used to... Nevermind."

Ilfa: "Pfft. Fufufufu"

Suddenly, she bursts into laughter at my stumbling of words which only makes my face even more hot.

Ilfa: "Don't worry. I won't do those things to you anymore."

Fabian: "Huh?"

Ilfa: "I don't want to use you like I did before."

Fabian: "I don't think you were ever using me. I consented to it, remember?"

Ilfa: "...Still. It's weird for you to consent to that. Sure you survived multiple times, but... Things have changed."

Her tone drops back down as her face becomes more sullen rather than happy like before.

Ilfa: "Before, I only saw you as a hostage, so the risk wasn't all that high for me. But now... I don't want to risk anything that would put you in danger."

Yeah, I'm feeling more and more confident what Ilfa's feelings are. Especially with Tarifa's talk as well. But I'm surprised she's talking about all of this. Maybe it's because her mind's still hazy after waking up?

Fabian: "Is there a way to not try and kill me?"

Ilfa: "Technically, yes. But it's like having the most delicious piece of food in your mouth and not wanting to eat it, let alone chew it."

For me, it'd have to be the crepes that our maids used to make. They started making them for Ellen when she was young, but I ended up giving it a try at some point. The sweetness of the strawberries along with the smooth texture from the cream, complimented by the savory taste of the crepe itself. Yeah... If that was in my mouth, I'd most likely have already swallowed it just out of instinct.

Ilfa: "...But, why are you asking me these things?"

Fabian: "Huh?"

Ilfa: "You sound like you actually want to do those things with me again."

I can't deny that I've held in that feeling all this time since we started hugging, and even now. But again, I'd prefer to let Ilfa realize her feelings. I don't want to jump to any conclusions.

Fabian: "That's only if you want to."

Ilfa: "What?"

Fabian: "Like I said, I consented to it ages ago. So if you really want to, then we can."

Ilfa: "..."

She's been hiding her face at my chest level for most of this talk, so I take this moment of silence to move away a bit, readjusting myself so that we're now facing one another. Her beautiful, scarlet red eyes glow in front of me as I find myself staring deeply into them. But suddenly, her face becomes a little pained as her eyelids gently close halfway.

Fabian: "There a problem?"

Ilfa: "Th-that pain is back."

Fabian: "In your chest?"

Ilfa: "Mm. So could you move away for a-"

Hearing her asking me to move away was what pulled me in. If she can't understand what the pain is on her own, then I may as well help her. And so, I sealed her lips with my own, cutting her sentence short as her eyes open back up. I refuse to get too into it and resort to only using my lips as I slowly pull away, leaving Ilfa as her face immediately becomes flushed, with her lips slightly agape.

Fabian: "How about now?"

Ilfa: "...Be-better."

Fabian: "So I don't need to move away?"

Ilfa: "..."

I can feel my heart being tugged along as I find my body drawing closer as I once again seal our lips once again, only this time, her lips were a lot more relaxed as we both found ourselves attacking at each others lips. Every time I feel Ilfa's mouth opens for a moment, I get the urge to go further, but I steady myself and continue going along with Ilfa's pace instead. This time, it was Ilfa who broke away from the kiss.

Ilfa: "More-"

Only for her to immediately seal her lips around mine once more. I can feel and even hear her getting more and more into it as her arms wrap tightly around me as I find myself doing the same. With our bodies this close, I can't tell if it's my heart that's beating this loudly or if it's Ilfa's, but I don't care at this point. And almost as if we're in sync with one another, our tongues end up finding each other at the same time as our kiss takes a more passionate turn. Now it isn't just my face or chest that's getting hot, but now my entire body is getting heated. There's no way that Ilfa still doesn't know, right?

It was then that Ilfa draw herself away from the kiss as we both find ourselves panting with one another as her eyes appear to glow even brighter, making her more alluring by the second.

Ilfa: "I... I think I understand now."

Fabian: "Understand what?"

Has she finally realized?

Ilfa: "...I'm hungry."

Is she for real?! I got my hopes up for nothing! But wait. That would imply she wants to do "that?" Sure I'd love to, but with everything going on, this doesn't feel right. And right when she was about to kiss me once more, I place my hand on her shoulder, stopping her before she could.

Ilfa: "Huh?"

She looks at me in confusion as I feel a sharp pain assault my chest. I really don't want to stop Ilfa, but if she's going to go along with the idea of this being another one of her "feeding" sessions, then I can't continue.

Fabian: "I'm sorry."

Ilfa: "What do you mean?"

Fabian: "Do you really think that this is because you're hungry?"

Ilfa: "I'm... Not sure."

Fabian: "Then how would you feel if I was gone?"

Ilfa: "What? Of course I'd hate that!"

Fabian: "Then why?"

Ilfa: "...Because I want to stay by your side."

I feel so close right now. I feel the exact same way. Ilfa's one of the main reasons why I insisted on being allowed to be here when Kaede was here. I know the reason why, but Ilfa still looks to be confused.

Fabian: "I want to stay by your side too. But... That's because, I love you!"

Ilfa: "H-huh?"

There! I actually said it!

Fabian: "So? What is the reason for-"

Suddenly, breaking through my hold, Ilfa closes in as I find myself pushed onto my back with her on top of me. Her hair dangles off to the sides of me with her eyes now steadily filling up with tears as she looks down at me.

Ilfa: "I..."