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Chapter 11

Nash

My skin is tight, like it doesn’t belong on my body. I would rip it off and bust out of it if I could. Two weeks, two weeks since Caroline came to work with us, since I spent the weekend with her, and I haven’t forgotten it. If anything, I’m remembering it more and more as the days go on. The way she invades my days, and now my nights, is driving me insane.

Glancing at the clock, I look down at Bailey. “Wanna go for a drive?”

She’s always ready for one. With her head hanging out the truck window, she’s living her dream. She knows exactly what that phrase means, and before I even move, she’s by the door, ready to go.

I don’t even bother putting a shirt on, it’s too hot out anyway. The only thing I bother with is grabbing my wallet and slipping some shoes on. “C’mon.” I open the door and she’s off to the races. She’s already at the truck in the fifteen seconds it takes me to lock the door. Bailey paces, prancing as she waits for me. “Hang on a sec there, girl.” I walk slowly toward her, which makes her prance harder and me laugh out loud.

It’s still weird for me to hear my laugh. I haven’t done it in so long, it’s rusty sounding, a little hoarse. Eventually it’ll be second nature like it was before. I believe that now, where I didn’t before. Small steps – that’s what the therapist told me – and five f*cking years later, I finally believe her.

“Ready girl?”

Bailey barks her approval. I roll down the windows, crank up the radio, and start on a drive through the only town I’ve ever called home. Memories of Katie are in every corner of this town, and typically they leave me feeling down and upset. Tonight though, as I drive past the Sonic where we had our first date, I smile fondly, remembering how nervous I was when I snuck in for that first kiss. We’d bumped heads, and she’d laughed. Not the best moment of my young life, but now I can appreciate it for what it was. A part of my life that’s been taken away from me. Moving on is hard, but now I’m finally figuring out. I have to.

“River or lake?” I ask Bailey.

I swear this dog understands what I’m saying. Basically I’m asking if we want to go left or right. She moves from her spot over on the passenger side to over to where I am.

“Okay, we’ll go toward the lake.”

She barks in approval as I turn left, traveling down a road I’ve driven a million times before. I’m singing along to the radio when I see a car with their hazards on. It’s eight, not horribly late, but there won’t be many people rolling through this area. I put my own hazards on, pulling in behind them. The car looks familiar, but I can’t place it. “Stay here,” I tell Bailey as I put in park and hop out. It looks as if the person is sitting in the car, and I don’t want to scare them.

“You need some help?” I ask as I walk up to the car.

“What are the odds?” The voice answering my question is very familiar. “Hey, Nash.” Caroline gets out, a smirk on her face. “Sure didn’t expect you to be the first person who stopped.”

Her eyes travel up and down my abdomen and chest. Now I wish I had put a shirt on, not because of the way she’s looking at me, but because of the way I react to her.

“This is a quiet stretch of road, you’re lucky it was me.” I walk to her. “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t know, it just stopped and there’s stuff coming out from underneath it.” She puts her face in her hands. “Just what I need.”

“Where’s it coming out at?”

“Up in the front.” She points. “I can’t see what color it is, though.”

“Probably radiator fluid, which means there’s no way you could have done it yourself anyway. You’d need help of some kind.”

She grins. “It’s kinda my lot in life.”

“You got a jack?” I ask as I walk to the back. “I can at least get under there and look.”

“Yeah, it’s in the trunk.”

“Let me turn the lights on, so I can see.”

Jogging to the truck, I get in, driving a few feet up the road, to turn around so that my truck is facing her car. I crank the lights on high and come to a stop close enough that I can see what’s going on.

Bailey tries to get out with me, but I push her back. “You can’t be around radiator fluid, you gotta stay here. I’ll even turn the air on for ya.”

“Here ya go.” She opens the trunk, showing me where the jack is.

“You can sit in the truck with the air on, if you want.”

“No, if you’re going to burn up, then I’m gonna burn up, too.”

“Suit yourself.” I start working to jack the car up. Once I have it far enough in the air, I sit down on the ground, before scooting backward.

“You’re going to lay down on the ground, with nothing to protect your back? It’s gonna be scratched all to hell, Nash.”

I glance up at her. “Wouldn’t be the first time, and I’m pretty sure last time it was scratched up was because of you.”

She blushes, I can see it in the way she ducks her head, the breath she shakily inhales. “It’s really not gentlemanly to say those types of things when you’re helping me.”

The hole in her radiator isn’t huge, but I can see it. Scooting myself back out, I sit up, brushing off my hands. “I’ve never been accused of being a gentleman, Caroline, and I sure as f*ck wasn’t one when we spent time together.”

Caroline

“No, you weren’t,” I answer aloud. In my head I tack on but I kinda liked it. “So what am I gonna do?” I try to bring it back to where this all began tonight.

“It’s going to need some work. Can’t tell how much here. I’ll have to look tomorrow. Let’s lock it up and I’ll give you a ride home.”

That leaves one issue. “I’ll have Taylor bring me to work tomorrow.”

“No need, I’ll pick you up in the wrecker in the morning when I come out to get this. Be ready around seven.”

There’s no denying he’s telling me what to do, and for some reason I accept it. After doing so many things in my life independently and having to come up with solutions on the fly, this is slightly welcomed. It’s nice not having to figure everything out, and then feeling the dread in your stomach as you do something you don’t want to do. This must be what it’s like having a partner.

I watch from the side of his truck as he does a few other things, locking up my car. It occurs to me that I shouldn’t objectify him like this, but I can’t help it. He’s got dirt on his skin, sweat mixing in, giving him the appearance of a warrior as the muscles on his back ripple. Bailey sits next to me, the door open, watching him too.

“He’s magnificent, isn’t he?” I whisper to her. She barks her approval.

“I’ve done all I can to lock it up for you. This road isn’t typically traveled, so it should be okay.”

He opens the passenger side door for us. Bailey hops in first, scooting to the middle of the bench seat, and I go in behind her.

“It’ll be a tight fit,” his voice is apologetic.

“No problem, I’m thankful you showed up and helped me.”

A breath escapes my lungs as I slide in next to Bailey and watch him as he walks around the front. The headlights hug his skin, highlighting every piece of flesh I’ve touched, and want to touch again. When he gets in, I’m thinking about the way he held my body as he plunged in and pulled out. Part of me is craving it, the other part is telling me it was a one-time thing and I shouldn’t allow myself to pretend like there will be another.

There’s tension in the cab of the truck as he drives to my house. “Do you not need directions?”

He glances over, a slight grin on his face. “I’m your boss, I have to approve your paperwork. I saw your address. Harper Valley isn’t big, ya know?”

I still forget I’m living in such a small town. “I guess that makes sense.”

Bailey rests her head on my lap, stretching out between the two of us as the radio plays softly in the background. Softly, I rub her head, enjoying it when she closes her eyes. Nash pulls into my driveway and quietly puts the truck in park.

“I hate to disturb her.”

“She’ll be okay,” he whispers, and I have to give him a look. “We’ll be here to pick you up tomorrow. I’ll wait until you go in.”

Part of me wishes he had offered to walk me to the door, the other part knows it would have been a bad idea and is thankful he didn’t. Carefully I get out, giving Bailey another pat on the head, rushing to my front door. When I open it, I turn, giving him a wave.

He waits for me to go in before he backs out, turning the truck toward his home. As I watch the taillights through the glass, I wonder why it bothers me so much to know he’s going home to an empty house.

Or maybe it bothers me more that I’m in one myself.