Ryan's ignoring me.
Why? I don't know.
He was fine when we came back from Paris. We even talked about to start trying for a kid and to make one of the rooms into a nursery after Ryan said he wants to make a family with me.
But since last week, when he came back from work, he has been quiet.
He doesn't say anything. He spends most of his time in the study room. Whenever I tried to wait for him so we could cuddle at night, he wouldn't come till I had fallen asleep.
Whenever I try to hug him or be affectionate, he doesn't return the affection, he barely looks at me. He excuses himself then leaves.
We're right where we started off.
It's worse than that.
At the start of our marriage; yes, we didn't talk but we still exchanged hi's or hello's, even said 'good morning' or 'good night'.
But now, Ryan has changed into a completely different person.
Something is bothering him.
I don't know what is.
But I'm scared.
It's Saturday night so I'm thinking of asking Ryan what's wrong and trying to spend time with him.
I even cooked lasagna- which is his favorite since his mom cooked it everytime for him.
Ryan came home 2 hours ago and went straight to our room. He hasn't come out from our room since then. When I tried to go in, it was locked and when I asked him if everything was okay, he didn't response.
That brought the ache in my chest again.
๐ ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ฅ๐ช๐ฅ ๐ด๐ฐ๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ.
Did I? I don't remember anything that would upset him. But still, I will ask him.
I came out of my thoughts as I heard Ryan coming downstairs. I quickly rushed out of the kitchen to find him wearing his tuxedo.
Why is he dressed up?
"Ryan?" I said, Ryan's hand stopped on the doorknob "where are you going?"
After which felt like a decade, Ryan finally said "Out. I have to meet someone."
Meet someone?
"Oh, you didn't tell me you were going outโฆ I made dinner." I tried to put a smile on my face but Ryan didn't once look at me "I made lasagna."
"You can eat. I'll eat out." He turned the doorknob to leave and my heart started racing as it knew if Ryan walked out of the door, he might not come back.
๐๐ฉ๐ข๐ต'๐ด ๐ด๐ต๐ถ๐ฑ๐ช๐ฅ.
But it could be true.
"Ryan, wait!" I said and his hand froze "please, justโฆ Wait." I swallowed down my tears as I spoke "you haven't spoken to me for a week. You've changed into a completely different person. I.." my voice broke "I'm scared.."
"There's nothing to be scared of, Rose."
But there is. There's so much to be scared of. I'm scared you'll loose feelings for me. I'm scared you'll leave me. I'm scared this marriage will end. I'm scared I might never see you again.
As much as the next sentence hurt me, I couldn't hold back myself from knowing the truth "are you seeing someone else?"
Ryan's head snapped towards me. Our eyes finally locked as his eye brows drew down together.
"What?" He said
"Is there someone else?" I asked, the ache in my chest increasing
"You think I'm cheating on you?" He said "why the hell do you think I'm cheating on you-"
"What the hell do you expect me to think?!" I said, my voice increasing more than I expected which gave Ryan a shock.
I swallowed back my tears again.
๐๐ฐ๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ค๐ณ๐บ.
"You've been ignoring me since last week. You've become worst than at the start of our marriage. You don't talk to me, you don't kiss me, you don't even look at me." My voice cracked "I can't even ask you if you stopped loving me because you never admitted that you loved me."
Something changed on Ryan's face. His face softened but his eyes told something else.
Was he hurt?
"What did I do?" I whispered, scared to raise my voice Incase I breakdown. "What did I do which made it so hard for you to look at me?"
Ryan's hand formed a fist beside him, he opened his mouth to say something but shut it back.
He broke our eye contact and turned towards the door "I'll be home late." He turned the doorknob as a tear escaped my eye "don't wait up for me." He left shutting the door behind him. Leaving me in an empty house with nothing but an ache in my chest.
Before I knew it, tears started rolling down my cheeks. I closed my eyes and tried to take deep breaths but instead a sob released my mouth.
I shouldn't be crying. Ryan didn't give a proper answer. Something must be bothering him.
I'll ask him again. I'll keep asking him till I get the real answer from him.
-----------
2 hours passed and Ryan didn't come home, I tried calling him but he didn't pick up. I left him texts saying I want to talk to him properly.
I couldn't eat so I placed the lasagna in the fridge.
After that I spent rest of the time in our bedroom, laying on our bed staring at the ceiling.
Every notification I got, I expected it to be Ryan's but none of it was.
I closed my eyes to let them rest to experience a flashback.
๐๐ต'๐ด ๐ฃ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐ข ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ต๐ฉ ๐ด๐ช๐ฏ๐ค๐ฆ ๐ฅ๐ข๐ฅ ๐ง๐ฐ๐ถ๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ต ๐ฉ๐ฆ'๐ด ๐ฅ๐ช๐ข๐จ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ด๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ธ๐ช๐ต๐ฉ ๐ค๐ข๐ฏ๐ค๐ฆ๐ณ. ๐๐ฆ ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ง๐ถ๐ด๐ฆ๐ด ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ต๐ข๐ฌ๐ฆ ๐ข๐ฏ๐บ ๐ต๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ต๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ต ๐ฃ๐ฆ๐ค๐ข๐ถ๐ด๐ฆ ๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ข๐ฏ๐ต๐ด ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ต ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ฎ ๐ข๐ด ๐ด๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฏ ๐ข๐ด ๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ค๐ข๐ฏ.
๐๐ต'๐ด ๐ด๐ธ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ต ๐ต๐ฉ๐ข๐ต ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ฅ๐ข๐ฅ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ท๐ฆ๐ด ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ฎ ๐ด๐ฐ ๐ฎ๐ถ๐ค๐ฉ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ข๐ต ๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ค๐ข๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ธ๐ข๐ช๐ต ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ฅ๐ช๐ฆ ๐ซ๐ถ๐ด๐ต ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ต ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ.
๐๐ถ๐ต ๐'๐ญ๐ญ ๐ฃ๐ฆ ๐ญ๐ฆ๐ง๐ต ๐ข๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ ๐ช๐ฏ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ธ๐ฐ๐ณ๐ญ๐ฅ. ๐๐ฐ๐ฎ'๐ด ๐จ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ. ๐๐ข๐ฅ ๐ธ๐ช๐ญ๐ญ ๐ญ๐ฆ๐ข๐ท๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฐ๐ฐ.
๐ ๐ธ๐ข๐ด ๐ค๐ญ๐ฆ๐ข๐ฏ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐ข๐ณ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ณ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฎ ๐ต๐ณ๐บ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ต ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ฏ๐ฌ ๐ฐ๐ง ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฑ๐ข๐ช๐ฏ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ข๐ต ๐ธ๐ช๐ญ๐ญ ๐ค๐ฐ๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ค๐ฆ ๐'๐ฎ ๐ข๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ ๐ข๐ง๐ต๐ฆ๐ณ ๐ฅ๐ข๐ฅ ๐ญ๐ฆ๐ข๐ท๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐ ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ข๐ณ๐ฅ ๐ข ๐ฌ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ค๐ฌ ๐ฐ๐ฏ ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ฅ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ณ.
๐ ๐ต๐ถ๐ณ๐ฏ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ง๐ช๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ฅ๐ข๐ฅ ๐ช๐ฏ ๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ฑ๐ข๐ซ๐ข๐ฎ๐ข๐ด- ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ๐ด ๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฃ๐ฐ๐ถ๐จ๐ฉ๐ต ๐ธ๐ช๐ต๐ฉ ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ฎ ๐ด๐ฐ ๐ธ๐ฆ ๐ข๐ญ๐ญ ๐ค๐ฐ๐ถ๐ญ๐ฅ ๐ฎ๐ข๐ต๐ค๐ฉ- ๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ด๐ต๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฅ ๐ฃ๐ข๐ณ๐ฆ๐ง๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ต ๐ฃ๐บ ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ณ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฎ ๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ญ๐ฅ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐ข๐ฏ ๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ท๐ฆ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฑ๐ฆ.
"๐๐ด ๐ฆ๐ท๐ฆ๐ณ๐บ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐ฐ๐ฌ๐ข๐บ?" ๐ ๐ข๐ด๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ฅ.
๐๐ฆ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ฅ๐ฐ๐ธ๐ฏ ๐ข๐ต ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ท๐ฆ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฑ๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ฆ๐ฅ, ๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ถ๐ฑ ๐ข๐ต ๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐จ๐ข๐ท๐ฆ ๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ข ๐ด๐ฎ๐ช๐ญ๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ฉ๐ช๐ค๐ฉ ๐ฅ๐ช๐ฅ๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ค๐ฉ ๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ฆ๐บ๐ฆ๐ด "๐ฆ๐ท๐ฆ๐ณ๐บ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ'๐ด ๐ฐ๐ฌ๐ข๐บ, ๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ๐บ."
"๐๐ฉ๐ข๐ต'๐ด ๐ต๐ฉ๐ข๐ต?"
๐๐ฆ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ข๐ต ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ท๐ฆ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฑ๐ฆ ๐ข๐จ๐ข๐ช๐ฏ "๐๐ต'๐ด.. ๐ถ๐ฎ.. ๐ช๐ต'๐ด ๐ด๐ฐ๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ.." ๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ด๐ช๐จ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฐ๐ธ๐ข๐ณ๐ฅ๐ด ๐ฎ๐ฆ "๐ค๐ข๐ฏ ๐ธ๐ฆ ๐ต๐ข๐ญ๐ฌ?"
"๐๐ง ๐ค๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ๐ด๐ฆ. ๐๐ฐ๐ฎ๐ฆ." ๐ ๐ด๐ข๐ต ๐ฐ๐ฏ ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ฃ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ค๐ณ๐ฐ๐ด๐ด๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ญ๐ฆ๐จ๐จ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ธ๐ข๐ช๐ต๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ง๐ฐ๐ณ ๐ฅ๐ข๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ค๐ฐ๐ฎ๐ฆ. ๐๐ฆ ๐ด๐ข๐ต ๐ข๐ต ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ฐ๐ง ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฃ๐ฆ๐ฅ, ๐ธ๐ช๐ต๐ฉ ๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ฆ๐บ๐ฆ๐ด ๐จ๐ญ๐ถ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ท๐ฆ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฑ๐ฆ "๐ธ๐ฉ๐ข๐ต'๐ด ๐ธ๐ณ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐จ, ๐ฅ๐ข๐ฅ?"
๐๐ข๐ฅ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ข๐ต ๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ฃ๐ถ๐ต ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ต๐ช๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฅ๐ช๐ฅ๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ด๐ฎ๐ช๐ญ๐ฆ "๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ๐บโฆ ๐๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ๐ฆ'๐ด ๐ด๐ฐ๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ฏ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ฌ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ธ ๐ฃ๐ถ๐ตโฆ ๐'๐ฎ ๐ต๐ฐ๐ฐ ๐ด๐ค๐ข๐ณ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ต๐ฆ๐ญ๐ญ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ."
๐ ๐ฌ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ต ๐ต๐ช๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐๐ฏ ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ด๐ต๐ฐ๐ฎ๐ข๐ค๐ฉ ๐ข๐ต ๐ฅ๐ข๐ฅ'๐ด ๐ธ๐ฐ๐ณ๐ฅ๐ด "๐ธ๐ฉ๐ข๐ต ๐ช๐ด ๐ช๐ต, ๐ฅ๐ข๐ฅ?"
"๐๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ๐บ, ๐ช๐ต'๐ด ๐ต๐ฐ๐ฐ ๐ฉ๐ข๐ณ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ต๐ฆ๐ญ๐ญ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ. ๐๐ถ๐ด๐ต.. ๐ฉ๐ข๐ท๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด." ๐๐ข๐ฅ ๐ฉ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ท๐ฆ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฑ๐ฆ, ๐ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ข๐ต ๐ช๐ต ๐ข๐ด ๐ฅ๐ข๐ฅ ๐ด๐ข๐ช๐ฅ "๐ ๐ธ๐ข๐ฏ๐ต ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ธ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐'๐ฎ ๐จ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ๐บ," ๐ฅ๐ข๐ฅ ๐ฑ๐ญ๐ข๐ค๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ฉ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ฐ๐ฏ ๐ฎ๐ช๐ฏ๐ฆ, ๐ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ข๐ต ๐ฉ๐ช๐ฎ ๐ข๐ด ๐ต๐ฆ๐ข๐ณ๐ด ๐ง๐ฐ๐ณ๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ช๐ฏ ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ฆ๐บ๐ฆ๐ด "๐'๐ฎ ๐ด๐ฐ๐ณ๐ณ๐บ.. ๐ ๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ฑ๐ฆ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ง๐ฐ๐ณ๐จ๐ช๐ท๐ฆ ๐ถ๐ด."
"๐ ๐ฐ๐ถ'๐ณ๐ฆ ๐ด๐ค๐ข๐ณ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐ฎ๐ฆ.." ๐ ๐ธ๐ฉ๐ช๐ด๐ฑ๐ฆ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ฅ.
๐๐ข๐ฅ ๐ญ๐ช๐ง๐ต๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ฉ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ฑ๐ญ๐ข๐ค๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ข ๐ด๐ฐ๐ง๐ต ๐ฌ๐ช๐ด๐ด ๐ฐ๐ฏ ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ฉ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ.
"๐'๐ฎ ๐ญ๐ฆ๐ข๐ท๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ช๐ฏ ๐ด๐ข๐ง๐ฆ ๐ฉ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ๐ด." ๐๐ฆ ๐ด๐ข๐ช๐ฅ "๐ช๐ฏ ๐ฉ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ๐ด ๐ฐ๐ง ๐ข ๐ฑ๐ฆ๐ณ๐ด๐ฐ๐ฏ ๐ ๐ต๐ณ๐ถ๐ด๐ต ๐ธ๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ญ๐ฆ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ข๐ณ๐ต๐ฆ๐ฅ๐ญ๐บ."
"๐๐ฉ๐ข๐ต?"
๐๐ข๐ฅ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ข๐ต ๐ฎ๐ฆ "๐'๐ฎ ๐ญ๐ฆ๐ข๐ท๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ช๐ฏ ๐ค๐ข๐ณ๐ฆ ๐ฐ๐ง ๐๐บ๐ข๐ฏ. ๐ ๐ธ๐ข๐ฏ๐ต ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ต๐ธ๐ฐ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐จ๐ฆ๐ต ๐ฎ๐ข๐ณ๐ณ๐ช๐ฆ๐ฅ."
My eyes flew open.
That was the night dad scared me to death and the night I found out Ryan will be the one I'll be spending the rest of my life with.
I turned my head to grab my phone. I opened it to check time.
1:25. No texts or calls from Ryan.
I sighed, turned off my phone and sat up.
The same flashback came to my head.
It's been years since I thought about it. I have never opened that envelope because whenever dad mentioned it, he always asked for my forgiveness. As if that envelope contained a sin he had done which I would never forgive him for.
I was scared that it might be true and I didn't want to hate him so I never opened that envelope, neither did I told anyone about it.
I opened my drawer and took out a brown envelope.
My name was written on it with dad's cursive handwriting. Mom always loved his writing.
I clutched the envelope tighter as I debated whether I should open it or not.
I don't want my thoughts to be true. I don't want to hate my dad.
I took a deep breath then opened the envelope.
If dad has done something like that, I'll forgive him. I love him too much not to.
I took out a folded piece of paper from the envelope with shivering hands.
I placed the envelope aside and opened the paper.
I started reading with fear of what it might contain.
๐๐ฆ๐ข๐ณ ๐๐ฐ๐ด๐ฆ,
๐๐บ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ท๐ฆ, ๐ ๐ฌ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ธ ๐ธ๐ฉ๐ข๐ต ๐'๐ฎ ๐ข๐ฃ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ต ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ต๐ฆ๐ญ๐ญ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ด๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ญ๐ฅ๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ฃ๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ณ๐ช๐ต๐ต๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐ฐ๐ฏ ๐ข ๐ฑ๐ช๐ฆ๐ค๐ฆ ๐ฐ๐ง ๐ฑ๐ข๐ฑ๐ฆ๐ณ ๐ง๐ฐ๐ณ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ง๐ช๐ฏ๐ฅ. ๐๐ฏ๐ด๐ต๐ฆ๐ข๐ฅ, ๐ช๐ต ๐ด๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ญ๐ฅ'๐ท๐ฆ ๐ฃ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐ต๐ข๐ญ๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ข๐ฃ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ต ๐ง๐ข๐ค๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ง๐ข๐ค๐ฆ. ๐๐ถ๐ต ๐'๐ฎ ๐ด๐ฐ๐ณ๐ณ๐บ, ๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ๐บ. ๐๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ต๐ณ๐ถ๐ต๐ฉ ๐ฉ๐ถ๐ณ๐ต๐ด ๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฐ๐ฐ ๐ฎ๐ถ๐ค๐ฉ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐'๐ฎ ๐ด๐ค๐ข๐ณ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ช๐ต ๐ธ๐ช๐ญ๐ญ ๐ฉ๐ถ๐ณ๐ต ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ต๐ฐ๐ฐ ๐ข๐ต ๐ข ๐ฑ๐ฐ๐ช๐ฏ๐ต ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ฎ๐ช๐จ๐ฉ๐ต ๐ฉ๐ข๐ต๐ฆ ๐ฎ๐ฆ. ๐ ๐ค๐ข๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ฉ๐ข๐ท๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ข๐ต. ๐๐ฐ, ๐ ๐ธ๐ข๐ช๐ต๐ฆ๐ฅ. ๐ ๐ธ๐ข๐ช๐ต๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ข๐ง๐ต๐ฆ๐ณ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ'๐ด ๐ฅ๐ฆ๐ข๐ต๐ฉ. ๐ ๐ธ๐ข๐ช๐ต๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ช๐ญ๐ญ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐จ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ธ ๐ถ๐ฑ. ๐ ๐ธ๐ข๐ช๐ต๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ช๐ญ๐ญ ๐ ๐ง๐ฐ๐ถ๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ต ๐ ๐ธ๐ข๐ด ๐ฅ๐ช๐ข๐จ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ด๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ธ๐ข๐ด ๐ข๐ฃ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ต ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ญ๐ฆ๐ข๐ท๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ฐ๐ณ๐ญ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ถ๐ฏ๐ช๐ต๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ช๐ต๐ฉ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ.
๐ ๐ฌ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ธ ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ด๐ฐ๐ฏ ๐ฉ๐ถ๐ณ๐ต๐ด ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ. ๐ ๐ฌ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ธ ๐'๐ฎ ๐ญ๐ฆ๐ข๐ท๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ช๐ต ๐ฉ๐ถ๐ณ๐ต๐ด ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ. ๐๐ถ๐ต ๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ๐บ, ๐ธ๐ฆ'๐ญ๐ญ ๐ข๐ญ๐ธ๐ข๐บ๐ด ๐ฃ๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ช๐ต๐ฉ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ. ๐๐ถ๐ณ ๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ณ๐ช๐ฆ๐ด ๐ธ๐ช๐ญ๐ญ ๐ฃ๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ช๐ต๐ฉ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐'๐ฎ ๐ญ๐ฆ๐ข๐ท๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ช๐ฏ ๐จ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฅ ๐ฉ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ๐ด.
๐ ๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ฑ๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ญ๐ฆ๐ต๐ต๐ฆ๐ณ, ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐๐บ๐ข๐ฏ ๐ข๐ณ๐ฆ ๐ฐ๐ฏ ๐จ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฆ๐ณ๐ฎ๐ด. ๐ ๐ฌ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ธ ๐ฉ๐ฆ'๐ด ๐ฉ๐ข๐ณ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ถ๐ฏ๐ฅ๐ฆ๐ณ๐ด๐ต๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ฃ๐ถ๐ต ๐ ๐ต๐ณ๐ถ๐ด๐ต ๐ฉ๐ช๐ฎ ๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ถ๐จ๐ฉ ๐ง๐ฐ๐ณ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ฃ๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ช๐ต๐ฉ ๐ฉ๐ช๐ฎ. ๐๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ ๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ฑ๐ฆ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ ๐ฎ๐ข๐ณ๐ณ๐ช๐ข๐จ๐ฆ ๐ต๐ถ๐ณ๐ฏ๐ด ๐ช๐ฏ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฌ๐ช๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ'๐ท๐ฆ ๐ข๐ญ๐ธ๐ข๐บ๐ด ๐ฅ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ฐ๐ง.
๐๐ฐ๐ด๐ฆ, ๐ธ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐ ๐ง๐ช๐ณ๐ด๐ต ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ญ๐ฅ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ช๐ฏ ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ข๐ณ๐ฎ๐ด, ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ข๐ณ๐ต ๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ญ๐ต๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ข๐ต ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ ๐ด๐ช๐จ๐ฉ๐ต. ๐ ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ข๐ญ๐ธ๐ข๐บ๐ด ๐ฉ๐ข๐ฅ ๐ข ๐ด๐ฎ๐ช๐ญ๐ฆ ๐ฐ๐ฏ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ ๐ง๐ข๐ค๐ฆ ๐ซ๐ถ๐ด๐ต ๐ญ๐ช๐ฌ๐ฆ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ'๐ด. ๐ ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ฐ๐ง๐ต๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐ข๐ด๐ฌ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ธ๐ฉ๐บ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ๐ฆ ๐ข๐ณ๐ฆ ๐ฏ๐ฐ ๐ฑ๐ช๐ค๐ต๐ถ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ด ๐ฐ๐ง ๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ช๐ต๐ฉ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ช๐ฏ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ด๐ฑ๐ช๐ต๐ข๐ญ ๐ธ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ธ๐ฆ๐ณ๐ฆ ๐ฃ๐ฐ๐ณ๐ฏ. ๐๐ฆ ๐ข๐ญ๐ธ๐ข๐บ๐ด ๐ช๐จ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ช๐ต ๐ฃ๐ฆ๐ค๐ข๐ถ๐ด๐ฆ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ ๐ธ๐ข๐ด ๐ด๐ค๐ข๐ณ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ฐ๐ง ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ค๐ต๐ช๐ฐ๐ฏ. ๐๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐'๐ฎ ๐ด๐ต๐ช๐ญ๐ญ ๐ด๐ค๐ข๐ณ๐ฆ๐ฅ, ๐ต๐ฉ๐ข๐ต'๐ด ๐ธ๐ฉ๐บ ๐ ๐ค๐ข๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ต๐ฆ๐ญ๐ญ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ง๐ข๐ค๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ง๐ข๐ค๐ฆ.
๐๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ๐บ, ๐ ๐ณ๐ข๐ช๐ด๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ข๐ด ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ฐ๐ธ๐ฏ ๐ฅ๐ข๐ถ๐จ๐ฉ๐ต๐ฆ๐ณ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ท๐ฆ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ญ๐ช๐ฌ๐ฆ ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ฐ๐ธ๐ฏ, ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ด๐ฉ๐ข๐ณ๐ฆ ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ญ๐ข๐ด๐ต ๐ฏ๐ข๐ฎ๐ฆ. ๐๐ถ๐ต ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ'๐ณ๐ฆ ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ต ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ฃ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฅ.
๐ ๐ฌ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ธ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ช๐ด๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ด๐ฐ๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ด๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ญ๐ฅ ๐ง๐ช๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ต ๐ต๐ฉ๐ณ๐ฐ๐ถ๐จ๐ฉ ๐ข ๐ญ๐ฆ๐ต๐ต๐ฆ๐ณ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ๐บ, ๐'๐ฎ ๐ด๐ฐ ๐ด๐ฐ๐ณ๐ณ๐บ. ๐ ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ญ๐ญ๐บ ๐ข๐ฎ. ๐๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ข๐ฏ๐ต๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ต๐ฆ๐ญ๐ญ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ค๐ฆ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐จ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ธ ๐ถ๐ฑ ๐ฃ๐ถ๐ต ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ ๐ญ๐ฆ๐ง๐ต ๐ด๐ฐ ๐ด๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฏ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐ ๐ธ๐ข๐ด ๐ด๐ค๐ข๐ณ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ด๐ฆ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ญ๐ช๐ฌ๐ฆ ๐ ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ด๐ต ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ.
๐'๐ฎ ๐ด๐ฐ๐ณ๐ณ๐บ, ๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ๐บ-
The letter fell out of my hands. Tears formed in my eyes, the ache from earlier came back.
I covered my mouth as a sob released my mouth. I squeezed my eyes shut just to find those words printed in the darkness.
๐ ๐ฐ๐ถ'๐ณ๐ฆ ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ต ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ฃ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฅ.
The man who raised me. The man who loved me. The man who motivated me. The man whom I wanted my future husband to be like. The man who I thought was my father. That man lied.
He lied about his Identity. My mother lied about my own father.
My parents decided to hide this from me and how I find out the truth? From a fucking piece of paper.
I opened my eyes, my vision blurry from my eyes. I noticed I hadn't finished the letter. As much as I hate my parents right now, I picked up the letter and started reading again.
๐'๐ฎ ๐ด๐ฐ๐ณ๐ณ๐บ, ๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ๐บ. ๐ ๐ฌ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ธ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ช๐ด ๐ด๐ฐ๐ฎ๐ฆ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ข๐ต ๐ธ๐ฆ ๐ด๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ญ๐ฅ'๐ท๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฐ๐ญ๐ฅ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ฆ๐ข๐ณ๐ญ๐ช๐ฆ๐ณ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ฉ๐ข๐ท๐ฆ ๐ฆ๐ท๐ฆ๐ณ๐บ ๐ณ๐ช๐จ๐ฉ๐ต ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ฃ๐ฆ ๐ถ๐ฑ๐ด๐ฆ๐ต. ๐๐ถ๐ต ๐ ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ญ๐ญ๐บ ๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ฑ๐ฆ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ง๐ฐ๐ณ๐จ๐ช๐ท๐ฆ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ณ ๐ฎ๐ฐ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ฎ๐ฆ. ๐ ๐ฏ๐ฆ๐ท๐ฆ๐ณ ๐ค๐ข๐ณ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ช๐ง ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ธ๐ฆ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ฎ๐บ ๐ฃ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ฐ๐ฅ. ๐ ๐ข๐ญ๐ธ๐ข๐บ๐ด ๐ญ๐ฐ๐ท๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ญ๐ช๐ฌ๐ฆ ๐ฎ๐ช๐ฏ๐ฆ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ ๐ข๐ญ๐ธ๐ข๐บ๐ด ๐ธ๐ช๐ญ๐ญ.
๐๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ณ๐ฆ'๐ด ๐ข๐ญ๐ด๐ฐ ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐ ๐ธ๐ข๐ฏ๐ต ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ฅ๐ฐ. ๐ ๐ค๐ข๐ฏ'๐ต ๐ฅ๐ฐ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ฃ๐ฆ๐ค๐ข๐ถ๐ด๐ฆ ๐ช๐ต ๐ธ๐ช๐ญ๐ญ ๐ฑ๐ถ๐ต ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ช๐ฏ ๐ต๐ณ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ฃ๐ญ๐ฆ. ๐๐ข๐ฌ๐ฆ ๐ด๐ถ๐ณ๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ฅ๐ฐ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด, ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ญ๐บ ๐๐บ๐ข๐ฏ ๐ง๐ช๐ฏ๐ฅ๐ด ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ต ๐ข๐ฃ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ต ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด. ๐๐ฐ ๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ฆ ๐ฆ๐ญ๐ด๐ฆ ๐ด๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ญ๐ฅ.
๐ ๐ธ๐ข๐ฏ๐ต ๐บ๐ฐ๐ถ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐ต๐ฆ๐ญ๐ญ ๐๐บ๐ข๐ฏ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ข๐ตโฆ
I covered my mouth in shock.
Shit.