Chapter 21: Turning Part 1

In the dream, she sits astride me.

I avoid Her gaze as fingers run over and trace the love marks left by Yrelia upon my soul. A weird mix of pride, desire, and fucking jealousy, of all things, radiate from Her.

I can understand Her better now, feel Her…

And I don't like it.

She reaches down and begins examining the flame at my core. With warm regard she pulls it from me, takes a few sparks from it, and eats them.

What the fuck? There is still no mouth… she just… shoves it into herself. I can't help but watch her now as she shivers with a bit of glee.

Her eyes flit back down to me and I avert my gaze, recalling the last time ours met and NOT wanting a repeat of that.

She seems to… huff? An annoyed regret stains her good mood for a second. But then it's replaced with excitement as she reaches into herself and retrieves a little purple shard. Before I can ask she holds it over my flame and is watching it crumble and melt into the blaze.

Then she places it back inside my chest, and leans down to nuzzle my nose.

A series of knocks wake me from sleep. Bleary eyed I look around and am very confused as the dream fades from memory. The sunlight from the window alludes to it being almost afternoon. A dozen little aches flit across me, mostly around my collarbone, nipples, and… well yeah of course I'm sore down there! The memories bring a big silly grin to my face. I look down to Yrelia's still naked form. She just grumbles something. I giggle and elect to see what the other women might want. I pull from the sheets and approach the door as another knock sounds.

Tasii stands outside, a worried look on her face as she glances back toward the common room.

"Um… Hi?" My grin wavers a bit.

"Hi." She gives my naked form a sideways look. "So… um… There's a woman downstairs asking for you."

"What? Who…?"

My grin dies as I remember. Emarial. Fuck.

"Oh." My sour look leads her to an incorrect assumption.

"She's not… she doesn't look like a Lyttoral duenna. But I don't think we should take the chance. Kque can–"

"She's not." I sigh, then put my head into a hand. "Fuck. Fuck!"

Tasii looks back to me, confused. "How do you know?"

My anger gives me fake courage. "She found me last night. Before the dinner. I… I went out for a walk and… Fuck!"

"What's going on?" A tired yawn sounds from behind me.

I look back to see Yrelia sitting up in bed, blearily watching us both. I pull Tasii into the room and shut the door behind her.

"I… she said she's Sun Spoken and…" I hug myself as I lean against the bed. "Wanted to talk."

Yrelia moves beside me and wraps our blanket around my shoulders. Tasii purses her lips.

"Why didn't you–"

"Because last night was perfect and I didn't want to think about her!" I snap, way harder than I thought possible.

Tasii reels at my sudden anger, even Yrelia jumps a bit.

"I'm… I'm sorry. I'm sorry." I try to push the frustration down, take a deep breath. "Her name's Emarial. She… I… We bumped into each other last night. She could tell I was Sun Spoken. Or says she can."

Tasii sighs, "The book pretty much proved it for you. But what about her?"

"She…" I touch my sternum. The spark is now a little bigger.

I whisper, "I thought it was just… horny sex stuff. A cold ache in my chest. But then she came along, and I could feel her. From like… a dozen feet away. A fucking bonfire. Made it worse."

"What did Kque think this was? That cold. When you told her?" Tasii mumbles.

I shake my head, "I didn't tell her. It was always the worst in bed with…" I glance back to Yrelia. "It was like sleeping next to a warm flame you can't snuggle up to."

"Oh… huh." Yrelia smirks, and that helps soothe the anxiety. "That… was that why? With the nip–"

"Yes." I hiss, cutting her off. "Yes that's… It… It's alive. Or something. Doing… that, warms it."

I blush and can't help but see Tasii's expression shift. She calms a bit.

"I… I'm sorry I didn't mention it. I just… Fuck! Yesterday was so great!" Yrelia begins to grin, but I cut her off, "Even before last night. It was amazing. With the garden, and that cold mushy sweet food thing, and dinner."

"I get it." Yrelia shifts to move off the bed.

Tasii sighs, "Next time just… let us know? Like, before the surprise can pop in for lunch? Scared me and Kque to near death when the owner pointed her to our table."

I wince and nod, "Sorry."

"It's okay. We'll keep her busy while the two of you get…" She glances between us, scrunches up her nose at our smell and smirks a little. "Ready."

I thank her and shut the door as she leaves. I stop there and just… lean into the wood. Intentionally bonking my head lightly and letting it rest against it. Angry and still tired, but also wide awake and frustrated at my own stup–

Yrelia moves up behind me. "You okay?"

"I really really don't want to deal with her right now." I grumble as Yrelia places a hand on my back, and begins to caress slow circles.

"This person, the Sun Spoken. She really gets you upset."

The kiss flares into my mind, and I can't help but seeth as the little flame inside me, the one she forced into me, seems to prickle.

"Yeah." I whisper. "She… Yesterday… We didn't have a great first meeting."

I hate myself then. How I can't just… tell her. How I… even now… blame myself, somehow, for what happened.

Yrelia moves up and wraps me into a hug, all soft and warm. I can't help but be distracted by that touch as the aches and memories of last night return.

"Yrelia." I mumble, voice going weak as she kisses and nibbles at the back of my neck.

"Mhm?"

"Please fuck me."

She giggles into the back of my neck, and we make our friends wait downstairs a little longer.

I enter the common room with Yrelia's hand tight in mine, both of us dressed in only slightly old pairs of her clothes. It's almost lunchtime, and every table and most chairs are full. Emarial stands out though, still a head taller than every woman in the room.

Deep breaths.

And we head over, my weak legs only a bit wobbly from Yrelia's… attentions.

The large woman sits with her back to a wall and notices me almost immediately. Tasii and Kque sit across from her, leaving two chairs between them for myself and Yrelia, thank fuck. Drinks sit alongside each spot, even ours. As I approach her radiant flame blazes and flickers against mine, it doesn't hurt but fuck does it stoke my anger.

Emarial nods to me, and this signals to Tasii and Kque that we're here, her bright amber eyes only grazing over my hand in Yrelia's before we sit.

A silence, a held breath.

"So… Here she is" Tasii speaks up first. "And this is Yrelia."

Emarial doesn't take her eyes off me, "When you mentioned friends, I didn't expect this many. Not all here."

I don't hide my irritation, "You said you had questions, wanted to… share some trade secrets? Whatever the fuck that means."

She sighs, "I don't know how much you're okay with them knowing. I'm trying to be considerate of your privacy, even if subtly is out the window."

"Could have tried that last part yesterday." I reply with bite.

That makes Kque side eye me, face full of worry. Tasii actually raises her eyebrows at my tone.

Emarial grits her teeth. "Fine."

A pause.

"First off, how much do you know?" She raises a hand and motions between us, at our chests. "About your… our unique problems. About Her?"

"I still don't think I'm anything special." I let out a sigh. "But… honestly not much. Just…"

I won't tell her about my past. Fuck her. She doesn't get that from me.

Yrelia surprises me with her cheerful tone and inserts, "She's very modest."

Emarial glances over at her, then back to me. "How much have you found out? How much has She communicated with you?"

I falter at Her mention, anger simmering down to a low boil. "I… Not much at all."

No… that's not true. Half-remembered dreams flit at just the edge of memory.

Emarial raises an eyebrow.

"Does… I dream of Her, I think. It's hard to remember." I add, "Can she do that? Can she communicate through dreams?"

Emarial nods, "It's not a good thing. Especially this soon. How often?"

I snort bitterly, "Can't be worse than what you–" I bite off the next words, take a deep breath. "I don't know. Like… four times now? Five? It's hard to remember them once I wake up."

"What about last night?" She gives Yrelia a real once over. Yrelia's expression… Her smile stays but I swear I see something else in those eyes as she matches Emarial's short stare.

I look to her, then back to Emarial, "The fuck does that matter?"

"She… gets more active after you… um…."

I bristle at how plainly she reads me, reads us. Thinks she fucking understands–

"I'm sorry," Tasii interrupts. "I'm a bit lost. Who are we talking about here?"

Emarial's composure breaks with a grimace. "Our patron. The being that the Weaver's Wood is named for. She's branded us and made us her's."

I sputter, "What? Branded? Like…"

"Mind, body, and soul. Your Her's now." She meets my eyes, apology written there she won't speak. "It's just as bad as it sounds."

"Fuck that." Yrelia laughs. "And fuck your hokey dogmatic shi–"

"Did you tell them? Tell her?" Emarial looks to Yrelia, then back to me.

"I still don't even understand half of what your trying to–"

Emarial sighs, "It was, what, six days ago that you changed? When that nightmare attacked?"

I shrug. Close enough.

"That cold ache I helped you with. Have you told… Yrelia, was it? How you keep that fire going?"

I feel the blood drain from my face. Oh no… that fire I could feel. That hunger…

"Have you even noticed that half your desires are–"

No. No no no no. Please no. Don't you fucking say it! Don't you ruin this!

"Sure. It's not a hard thing to spot." Yrelia grins easily, cutting her off. "Anyone that it matters to knows."

Emarial frowns at her, Yrelia matches with a chuckle. "Ina here is… still adjusting." She pats my held hand, "But I can certainly tell the difference. I went in with full knowledge and understanding of what she might need."

With those words she smothers any and all fears. I love her so much! I have to close my eyes for a few seconds to stop water from gathering. I won't cry in front of this fuck again.

Emarial looks to Tasii and Kque. "What about you two?"

They don't quite seem to follow everything, and before they can reply Yrelia steps up again. "They've not been invited. But I'll be sure to give them the talk, beforehand."

She gives Emarial a very condescending wink. I didn't even know that was possible to do?

Weirdly enough, Emarial sighs with relief. "Good, good. I… I'm glad you've already worked it all out."

"Have problems with less than honest members?" Yrelia teases, carrying a satisfied and very smug grin as she leans back.

Emarial looks away, "Not all of us had the luxury of having it explained six days into the experience."

A long pause. I sigh and finally break the silence.

"You had other questions."

Emarial looks back, much more at ease now. "The rest of mine are not exactly related now. You're fresh to all this. Was worried you were, or might be, someone with a lot more history. I'm actually looking for someone like us who might be… um… up to no good."

It's my turn to frown. "Oh. Okay."

"So, what else can I tell you? What else would you like to know?" She spreads her hands, palms up over the table, "I have a… decent amount of experience. Can point you toward the nearest person or group that can help train you. Give you information about the nightmares and other things."

"Huh, well thanks." I smirk wearily. "But, no."