CHAPTER 36

Much, much later, Charlotte luxuriated in the warm, giddy afterglow. Without shame. Their lovemaking had exceeded everything she'd ever thought possible. When it was so right, it was so powerful.

But what happened next?

Her back curled into John's chest and his arm rested across her waist. His warm breath fanned her hair. At this moment, everything was idyllic, perfect. What dreams were made of.

The morning light would bring reality, though. For John it would bring guilt, Charlotte was sure. He'd given in to his baser instincts and he was going to hate himself for betraying Sarah's love. Charlotte knew him that well. It didn't take someone with a psychology degree to figure that one out.

She memorized the feel of his naked skin against hers as she closed her eyes. Regrets she would leave to John. For her, last night had been exactly what she wanted. And she wouldn't apologize for that.

Gently, she removed his arm and slid from the bed. She didn't want Alice to wake up and find her gone. That was the trouble with growing up--- it made a person responsible. Weeks ago she wouldn't have cared.

She turned her gaze to him and soaked up that relaxed, sated look on his handsome face. A look their lovemaking had put there. But the word 'love' had never been mentioned. She wanted to lean over and kiss him to feel the stubble that shadowed his face, but he'd awaken. She wasn't ready to see the guilt in his eyes. For now she'd take the look on his face to signify that last night had meant something to him.

She was satisfied with that for now.

She found her T-shirt and pulled it over her head.. Finding her panties took some time, though. Finally she saw the hot pink sticking out from the sheet. After easing them free, she moved toward the door. She stopped and blew him a kiss, reluctant to tear her eyes away from his beautiful, sleeping form. She wondered if she'd ever see him like that again.

John awoke with a smile. He stretched, ready to face the day with an energy he had not experienced in a long time. Then he noticed his pyjamas spread out on the wooden floor halfway across the room.

Oh, no! What had he done? He struggled to get into a sitting position. The details of last night came back in vivid Technicolor. Charlotte--- her beautiful face, sensual grin, deep sighs, frantic groans, and seductive touch that had awakened parts of him he'd sworn were dead forever.

They belonged to Sarah.

But he couldn't bring up Sarah's face.

All he could see was Charlotte's.

He buried his face in his hands as guilt the size of the Alamo weighed him down. What had happened to his good judgment?

His control?

Control was impossible around Charlotte. He'd known that the first moment she'd scorched him with those blue eyes.

He got to his feet and went for his clothes. He had to talk to her. Thank goodness she had returned to her room. That could have been a disaster.

He heard conversations from the kitchen as soon as he opened the door.

"What are we having for breakfast today, Charlotte?" That was Alice.

"How about frozen waffles?" Charlotte answered, and a sliver of excitement pierced him. Where was his control?

He took a detour into the bathroom to shave and to get his emotions in order.

"Hurry, John," his mother called. "Or we're going to miss Sunday school again?"

He wiped his face and walked into the kitchen.

"Mornin', Daddy," Alice mumbled, her mouth full of waffle. "We're having waffles with blueberry syrup. Charlotte and me found em in the freezer section. They're yum-yum good. Want some?"

"Just coffee." He poured a cup and leaned against the cabinet. He didn't look at Charlotte.

"Charlotte's always finding new things for us to eat and they're good," Hae said, "You need to try one, son. Now I'm going to get dressed. Charlotte's singing this morning. Hurry, everybody."

Charlotte pushed back her chair and his traitorous eyes zoomed to her flushed cheeks, her shining come-get-me eyes. God, she was a beautiful woman, especially with her hair loose and tumbling around her shoulders.

"Let's go, Alice girl,' Charlotte said.

Haetel paused in the entranceway. John paused with his cup halfway to his mouth. He waited for his daughter to angrily deny she was a girl, but she smiled, really smiled. He felt a jolt to his heart.

With blueberry syrup on her chin, she turned to face him. "Can I get some shorts like Charlotte's, Daddy?"

"Sure." He reached for a napkin and wiped away the syrup.

"And some sandals with pretty rhinestones on them?"

"Okay."

"Good. Charlotte will assist me in choosing some." Dolittle hurried after her as she ran for the hall.

"My, my," murmured Haetel. "Isn't that something?"

"Yes, it is." Charlotte winked as their eyes converged. Any control he had went south, where all his emotions seemed to be centered.

They arrived at church on time for Sunday school, and everyone gathered there for Pastor Johnson's message. Charlotte didn't hear much. She was focusing on giving a strong solo performance.

The pastor had asked her to sing "The Old Rugged Cross" again and she'd chosen to follow it with "Amazing Grace."

She was nervous, but dressed for the occasion. Miss Kittie's Tea Room had a small gift shop that sold a little bit of everything. One day after she and Angie had lunch, Charlotte found a sleeveless V-neck black dress that came to just below her knees. White-and-black beads edged the V, and Charlotte accessorized the dress with a white belt. It was her church dress. Her party dress she left at home.

"Ms. Lily will sing for us now." Her apprehensive mind was pierced by the pastor's voice. Haetel turned the organ up as he took a seat to the side.

Charlotte missed her cue and Hae glanced at her. Charlotte stared out at all the people of Horseshoe, and her nerves went harum-scarum wild. Who was she to be singing here? She had no training, no experience. Her father had always said she sang well and wished she'd taken lessons, but that was her father talking.

Her eyes met John's and he nodded. He believed in her. She got a boost of confidence and started singing. The cathedral echoed with her voice. There was total silence as the final note faded away. Charlotte exhaled slowly. Everyone stood up and began to applaud.

Afterward, people who had barely spoken to her hugged her. She felt like a queen for a day. How could she learn so much about herself and find happiness in one small town?