Will I survive without her? My demons hunt me, am I going to live or not? Should I go back? So many unanswered questions. How could I possibly go back, where would I even start from, but she was my world she was my solar system am I just going to throw all that away? All those bitter sweet memories? Burnt to ash by betrayal. One thing is for sure I'll never be the same after this.

After a tragic break up that shatters my cardiac muscle into a thousand microscopic pieces, I decide it's time to stop running away from my past and just accept things as they are, if I'm ever going to live I need to do this, happiness is a drug, I became a drug addict for nearly two years but now that my drug ( Christine) left I'm left to deal with the withdrawals. She drained me, all girls are the same I casually remind myself I'll never trust a single one of them. But maybe just maybe the one at the end is different.

The past four years have been really difficult for me, but she moved on like it was nothing, oh how cruel these girls are, she ate my insides and left not a shred of happiness all I see is depression, anxiety, suffering and futility day in day out.

After dating for nearly a year and a half it felt like she was the one for William, William thought it would last forever like in the movies but life is a tall glass of dirt and ash, it's here to bite me in the ass. Love is a twisted curse, she will find us all, she will make us all happy but then she will take everything we love and cherish away from us. We will cry and gravel but it won't be returned to us. Sometimes the beauty of something can be seen in it's ugliness.

But so far even without her I'm ok aren't I? well let's find out together shall we? Welcome to "Willy and Chrissy"

Willy & Chrissy

It was already October a month before the exams, all my friends were freaking out but so was I, I mean who wouldn't be? The next step, the bridge to senior high School, the gateway to paradise was just a few weeks away it would be amazing or so I thought. 


At the moment my sleep schedule changed and the time I spent with Christine gradually reduced day by day and week by week, normally I would sleep for atleast 8hours and at most 10hours of sleep, I treasured my sleep and my peace. It was the only thing keeping me sane apart from Christine herself but lets get to the start and end of these exams because Christine and I got into a situatioship just a while after the exams but that's for the chapters ahead. 


"Damn, how on earth am I supposed to cover two years of learning within an hour? Is the examination council on drugs? No no no this has to be some kind of misunderstanding" I said to myself 


October's heatwave.