Chapter 25: Beishan Lonely Soul

Beimang Mountain, known as a tomb mountain, was believed to be an ideal place for funerals and burials. Lu Bu was aware that many nobles from Luoyang chose this location for their final resting place, including himself. Reflecting on the past, he couldn't help but find a touch of irony in the fact that he, the one who had buried others, was now buried here. Nevertheless, he didn't fully grasp the implications of this situation. The hurried funeral had taken place a year ago, and the tomb was now overgrown with weeds. It was a stark reminder that the riches and honors of one's lifetime were transient, and that they held little meaning in the face of death.

Lu Bu knelt in front of the tombstone, tenderly clearing away the weeds and offering a libation of wine. He spoke to the tombstone as if addressing Ding Yuan himself: "I cannot determine whether my actions were right or wrong. Looking back, I realize that Prime Minister, your methods were not as shrewd as I initially perceived. Yet, I stood in your way, and perhaps you had thoughts of ending me as well. I've come here today to pay my respects, and I shall continue to do so annually. Should you harbor any grievances as a ghost, you are always welcome to join me."

The chilly morning wind rustled through the mountains, evoking an eerie atmosphere among the countless graves. However, Lu Bu remained unfazed by the haunting ambience. He continued, "The truth is, I've learned things now that you might have understood back then, but never got to experience. It's an uncomfortable realization. Yet, when I look at Luoyang City, I see no one deserving of my complaints or inquiries."

Lu Bu's soliloquy continued as he expressed his thoughts and regrets: "I admit my mistakes. Whether you were attempting to temper me or not, I had no right to take your life."

Naturally, the tombstone offered no response. Unperturbed by the silence, Lu Bu leaned against it, sipping wine and gazing at the sky. The quietude of the moment brought him a sense of tranquility.

Time seemed to blur as Lu Bu contemplated, until the sound of footsteps broke the stillness. A figure emerged along the path, dressed plainly yet exuding an air of authority. His presence was marked by a pair of sharp, penetrating eyes.

Observing Lu Bu, the figure hesitated briefly before approaching and placing a wine jar before the tombstone. "I thought you wouldn't come," the figure spoke.

"After some reflection, I realized there is much I still don't comprehend," Lu Bu replied, reaching for the wine jar. He had finished his previous one.

"This is wine for the deceased."

"It's fine. He probably won't forgive me, even if he were to appear before me now. I've come to terms with that possibility. If he has any lingering grievances, I welcome him to express them," Lu Bu said, pouring a bit of wine on the ground as an offering before taking another sip himself. "It's been a while since I've tasted wine from my homeland."

The conversation shifted to more practical matters as the figure inquired, "What are your plans moving forward?"

Lu Bu grinned, a touch of determination in his expression. "I plan to assist Prime Minister in pacifying the world. While I may not fully comprehend the grand scheme of things, I've learned how to leverage the circumstances. The world must be stabilized collectively. My objective is simple – to contribute and break the confines of my birth."

"Easier said than done," the figure, Zhang Liao, responded with a shake of his head. He held a clearer understanding of the challenges ahead than Lu Bu did. He pointed out that the lords in Kanto opposed Dong Zhuo not solely due to his character, but also because his methods clashed with the scholars' ideals. The world needed governance, and it couldn't be achieved through sheer military strength.

"The challenge lies in execution, not words. You and I are generals, not administrators. Our role is to fight well in battles," Lu Bu remarked. He had a straightforward approach – earn merits in the battlefield to achieve immediate results. This philosophy had been a constant throughout his life.

"True, but it's easier to talk about it than to achieve it," Zhang Liao reminded him.

The discussion continued, with Zhang Liao raising concerns about the complexities of their mission. Nevertheless, Lu Bu remained resolute. After paying their respects to Ding Yuan's tombstone, the two men left the mountain together, the loyal Red Hare horse accompanying them.

"Luoyang is now a lifeless city, its vitality extinguished. Most likely, they will all relocate to Chang'an this year," Lu Bu remarked as he gazed at the surroundings. He then turned to Zhang Liao, his good friend and companion in their shared struggles. "Wen Yuan, can I trouble you with a request?"

"Why bother with such formalities between us?" Zhang Liao mounted his black-maned horse and rode alongside Lu Bu.

"I anticipate that Xiangguo will be relocating to Chang'an soon. In a few days, I'll recommend you to him to assist with the move. You can help me ensure the safety of my wife and children during the journey. Others may not possess the necessary skills, but I trust you," Lu Bu suggested with a smile.

With Luoyang now resembling a ghost town and most of the necessary relocations already completed, the generals' families were the last to be transferred. However, Lu Bu was concerned about the long journey of over 700 miles. He was particularly worried about the safety of his wife, given her beauty.

"It's a small matter. You focus on your fight against the Kanto lords; just be cautious," Zhang Liao replied. If tasked with this mission, he would naturally take the utmost care of Lu Bu's family.

"Kanto lords?" Lu Bu chuckled at the mention of them. He didn't hold the Kanto lords in high regard.

As the two returned to Luoyang, they noticed Hu Zhen lurking near the top of the city walls.

"He's a troublemaker. Seems like he bears a grudge against you. Watch out for him," Zhang Liao warned, his expression showing his displeasure at Hu Zhen's unsavory appearance.

"He's not worth my attention. He's just a lowly individual," Lu Bu dismissed with a hint of disdain.

"Small people can cause significant trouble," Zhang Liao cautioned, shaking his head.

"Is he really worth our time? Let's go. Join me for a drink in a couple of days; consider it a farewell gathering," Lu Bu invited.

"Sounds good!" Zhang Liao agreed.