26. Clover Town

A/N: USD 1 = 100 Jewel, if you wanted to know how Fairy Tail's currency worked.

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Defeat the local "Mud Wizard" that has been terrorising local Rune Knights and preventing us from getting into the local salt mines—reward: 100,000 J.

The "Wizard" in question was just a man who dug a series of streams that caused the entrance of the mines and the hills to get up them to become untraversable mud lands.

Successful.

Hunt down beasts that have been destroying the cabbages of a prosperous cabbage farmer—reward: 90,000 J.

The beasts were escaped cloud mammoths from a local circus that had set up residency within the forest beside the farmlands.

Successful.

Investigate missing person cases and find any correlations that they might have with ghost sightings and a mysterious fog within the woods—reward: 400,000 J.

Totomaru and I were able to figure out that the ghosts and fog were all the results of a skilled illusionist. The people who were disappearing were all being lured into the woods without them knowing, getting trapped inside the woods to starve and be eaten by the wildlife. The illusionist was the former lord of the land who was overthrown by his people and removed from power by the government due to abusing his power. To get revenge, he collaborated with a dark guild to establish the traps.

Of the fourteen people who were brought into the forest, only eleven survived with one of the bodies not being found.

Successful, with the reward being raised by another 600,000 J for taking down a dark guild.

And this was only the first two weeks.

Totomaru and I didn't rest at all the moment we joined Phantom Lord. All of the meals we got were from restaurants we passed by, and all of our sleep was gained from camping or on the train rides between cities. The only times we bathed were when we stopped by a local inn every couple of days.

We wanted to accomplish two things as quickly as possible. First, to build up savings for us to use whenever we needed to. Second, to make a name for ourselves inside the guild.

And we succeeded in both.

The two of us quickly earned the nickname "The Hot-Footed Rookies," as well as a heavy savings of 2,390,000 J, with both it being split 1,195,000 J split evenly between the two of us.

For perspective, our monthly rent is only 40k to 50k, or 480k to 600k a year. Meaning just based on what we have now we could live fairly comfortably for a couple of years without worry.

But we weren't content resting on our laurels, with the both of us having too much fun going around on these random quests and seeing the country.

And right now, I am enjoying myself with our current job.

The two of us were in Clover Town in the middle of a festival, a small crowd was surrounding us cheering "Eat!" "Eat!" "Eat!" "Eat!" at the top of their lungs. In front of me was what used to be a fish, but all that was left now is bones. On my right was Totomaru, dry-heaving every time he took a bite of the fish we and three other pairs of people were challenged to eat.

The job description, "Me and my buddies have yet to meet a duo who could eat the infamous flying Hane-Sakana fish. The taste is so disgusting that not even the greatest fish lovers can stand it! So, grab a buddy and compete against six others to try and consume this abomination to the skies! Reward: 5,000 J for participation, 10,000 for whoever gets to finish their meal, and another 50,000 if both members of the team can finish it!"

Why did I choose such a foul job request? Well, it was too good to pass up, especially since Totomaru was the one that chose the stupid fucking "Mud Wizard" job. And now, he was suffering because of that decision.

"H-How *hugh* did you manage to eat this!?"

"The Captain...he...his post-workout shakes had these as one of the main ingredients. He thinks that they taste good, and forced me to drink a gallon every day..."

He looked at me in shock, taking note of my vacant eyes before looking at the blue and yellow winged fish with newfound determination.

The crowd and I were shocked as he began to devour it like a starved wolf. When it was only bones and the fish's head left, the crowd almost began to cheer before the event's host and our client announced with the help of a bullhorn the other condition needed to win.

"R-Remember, folks! He has to keep it down before he's considered a winner!"

Everyone, even our opponents in this contest, watched with trepidation as his cheeks puffed in and out, his hand held in front of his mouth in a bid to prevent himself from vomiting. The seconds ticked by before he leaned back in the chair, sticking his tongue out as a sign that it was staying down.

The small crowd around us erupted in cheers at that moment, the announcer joining them as he declared, "There you have it folks! For the first time in ten years, not one, but two people were able to complete the Hane-Sakana Challenge!!! Can the Iron-Belly Brothers compete, or are they out of the race, too!?"

I turned to my left to look at the duo from the Steel Body Mercenary Guild, as they were the only ones left after the other two groups dropped out earlier. The disappointment was audible from the crowd when the two limply shook their heads.

"And there you have it people, Lyssa Wisteria and Chikafuji Totomaru are our winners!!! If our contestants can all go into the back to retrieve their participation rewards we would be more than happy to give them their earnings! Give them all one more round of applause everyone!"

The eight of us all made our way behind the red curtain that separated the "dining table" from the backstage where the hosts met up with us.

The announcer, a lanky man named Donriko came up to us with an amused smile on his face and a briefcase in his hands. His friends went over to the others, handing them each a small stack of paper that they accepted before walking away, likely with the intent to eat something tasty to wash away the flavour.

"Well, colour me impressed! The two of you ate those fish like champions and came out of it 50 grand richer!" He said as he handed me the briefcase because Totomaru was still looking slightly sick. "Here, your winnings. You two earned it!"

"Thank you."

"Mm mhm! *hugh!*"

"Take care out there, and I hope to see you again next year! Ahaha!"

Donriko walked over to his buddies while laughing, with Totomaru and I walking out of the red tent. I looked at him with concern, taking note of his hand on his stomach and his skin looking sickly pale.

"Are you...going to be alright?"

"Let's just get to the inn..."

A part of me felt like I should feel sorry that I chose this job, but every other fibre of my being was dying of laughter. I didn't expect him to eat the whole fish, but this was just the perfect payback for the "Mud Wizard" fiasco.

I can still feel the mud...

Four Leaf Inn was a quaint little place. The rooms were decent in size and cheap, too. Our room in particular was a double bed with a kitchen and a bathroom, the latter was currently occupied by a hacking swordsman. Despite the request being simple, Totomaru and I showed up a week ago to participate in the festival that was actively going on.

The festival in practice is really nothing more than a front to extract money from the guild masters of the legal wizard guilds, the same people who are known to be as loose with their indulgences as they are eccentric.

Outwardly, it is just a festival meant to celebrate a bountiful crop season, but anyone with eyes could tell you that Clover Town is a trade city, not an agricultural one. Sure, maybe in the past it was different, but the "harvest" festival as seen today serves an entirely different purpose.

Even some of the events were extremely simple. Professional hopscotch, shuffleboarding, extreme smoking, and...mud wrestling. But some were actually entertaining. Rap battles (Totomaru surprised me with this), powerlifting contests (earned me an easy 20 grand from this), baking contests, street hockey, marathon running, and even a music troupe.

Though, there was an incident with a few people calling themselves the Jiggle Butt Gang...

Well, it doesn't matter to me. But a good night's rest does, and if Totomaru doesn't stop vomiting I'll knock him out to get it.

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Inside Clover Town's Guild Meeting Hall, dozens of people were watching the spectacle before them with mixed expressions. Almost everyone present had some level of alcohol in their system, but none were as drunk as the tiny old man dressed in a funny hat and the man with a comically large, pointy hat and purplish-red hair.

Makarov Dreyer, the small yet deceivingly powerful guild master of Fairy Tail was sitting on a table with an angered expression on his face. Beside him was an empty cask of beer that, combined with the rosy blush on his face, was the only sign you had that he was as drunk as possible.

"Take back your words or suffer my wrath, fool."

His words only made the man standing in front of him sneer as a twisted smile formed on his visage. His breath reeked with liquor, and his stance was noticeably wobbly. This was Jose Porla, the guild master of Phantom Lord.

"Oooh? What's wrong, teeny tiny? Can't stand the reality that you're oh so precious children are weaker than my phantoms? Is it so hard to comprehend that fairies are really just nats that have no strength of their own without the help of their precious grandpa?"

"You are on thin ice, Jose."

"Ehehehe! Oh~ I'm so scared! Someone save me!" the Phantom Lord guild master joked before taking a swig from the bottle in his hand. "You know very well that it's dangerous for any two of the Ten Wizard Saints to fight, Dreyar! Do you want Clover Town to end its festivities so soon?"

"Collateral damage or not, I refuse to let someone mock my children. Whatever damage may occur will be entirely on your hands, but it's not like it would be much of a fight to begin with."

The two Wizard Saints began to release their magic auras in a bid to intimidate the other, causing the other guild masters to intervene before the situation could escalate. Goldmine, the guild master of Quatro Cerberus and Bob, the guild master of Blue Pegasus placed their hands on Makarov's shoulders but were completely ignored. Ooba Babasaama, the guild master of Lamia Scale began smacking Jose in the back with her walking staff, but Jose was seemingly unphased.

But all of a sudden, Jose's aura receded as he went to take another swig of his drink. This action confused those present before he opened he wiped his mouth and spoke again.

"Well, we ourselves don't have to fight."

Makarov, intrigued by his sudden change in demeanor also calmed down his aura.

"Go on."

"Well! The thing that got you so mad was me insulting those little fairies of yours, right? So why don't we see who's guild members are stronger!?"

"Are you suggesting a guild war, Jose? Are you so desperate to have Phantom Lord disbanded?"

"No! No no no no no, nothing of the sort! But, I caught wind that you got an interesting little fly in your house of insects a few months ago. Well, it just so happens that I did, too! And they fit together like fire and ice! So what do you say, Makarov? Instead of us two old fogies fighting how about we let our newest recruits test their strength against each other, huh? Satan Soul against Devil Slayer?"

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