The Legendary Sucker

AUTHOR'S NOTES; Damn, it's been a hot minute. IM SO SORRY 😭

But! In my defense, I took a little vacation for almost a month and the newest installment of this series took way longer to write and post because it's very technical! Like, it took me a month and a half to do the first 2 chapters of A Survivor's Will! But I think it will be easier now that I have a good start on how I want to handle the mechanics of it. And now there are 8 parts to this series and I wrote over 45k since you guys last saw me!

Still… I am sorry 💙 you guys are my dear readers so I feel bad for the wait.

Anyway! I officially posted my walking dead gamer fic, so check that out if you're interested. I know gamer fics aren't for everyone, but it's not a traditional one, so you might enjoy it anyway.

Y'all know how this series works by now, but if you're new, hi! Welcome! Each part of this series can be read independently or in order as part of a soul's journey through the cycle of reincarnation.

Side note, I'm starting school again, so expect a slow down in updates again. So sorry.

As always, thank you guys for showing your love for my work. I hope yall enjoy!

Discord!

https://discord.gg/XhqUDAnbsH

EDIT: 4/7/2025. lol, author makes an oopsie and gaslights a reader about it, but finally got around to fixing it. Shout out to the wonderful reader for pointing out the plot error for me, and I'm so sorry for denying that it was, in fact, not Kashi's first summon. Lmao.

XXXXXXXXXX

We were sent home soon after, our parents wanting us somewhere more secure than the hospital since Tsunade had finished healing us, and it seems like half the Uchiha Compound is on guard duty, dark eyes boring into us the entire way. Sakumo left to do…. something with the sanin, probably plotting and scheming an old man's death, but whatever. In the following days, quite a few people came to visit us or sent gifts, filling my entire house with flowers and plushies, much to my delight. The first few to arrive, though, were Shikaku, Minato, and Kushina, their arms filled with presents in such a ridiculously exorbitant manner that it had Kakashi and I both clutching our stomachs and laughing.

Minato had scooped us into gentle hugs, a little weepy as he expressed how worried he was, which was frankly adorable. He gifted us with arm guards that were covered in all kinds of seals, something I knew took both a lot of time and a fair bit of money to make, along with a giant plush wolf and cat respectively. 

Kushina, with a vicious smile, had gifted us with some copied sealing techniques, some of which were no doubt from her clan's fuinjutsu, and sealing supplies along with some special exploding tags that she'd sealed some of her strongest ninjutsu into so that if we ran into trouble, we'd just have to activate them and watch the no doubt ridiculously overpowered fireworks.

Shikaku, however, merely sighs and dumps an entire duffle bag of Nara medicines, Akamichi cuisine, and Yamanaka herbal teas on us. "Troublesome brats."

I snort, but turn serious. "Shikaku-niisama, can you pass our thanks onto your clan mate and his team? He really saved us there."

Shikaku sighs again like I'm draining the life right out of him, but nods, lips curling into a reluctant smile. "And don't worry about your secret getting out. I put a gag order on him about your Sharingan."

I wince, having completely forgotten I'd flashed my Mangekyō at the man in the first place. "Thanks."

He softens and gently pulls me into his lap where I soon go boneless against his chest, much to his amusement. "You like my chakra way too much."

"It's because it reminds me of someone very precious." I answer, relaxing as I soak up the feeling of cool shade on my senses.

"Oh?" He asks, curious in that sharp way Naras get when they've found an interesting puzzle, but I just grin at him. Not like I could tell him about my shadow friend from another life.

XXXXXXXXXX

Contrary to my initial belief, Danzo didn't mysteriously vanish in the middle of the night. Although our parents were being sneaky about it, it seems like the Yondaime was cleverly playing the long game. With the skirmishes starting to amp up with Kumo and Iwa, and Suna soon to pick a side, not that anyone thought they'd side with Konoha since the White Fang decimated their front lines in the last war, the stability of the village took priority.

So, instead, Sakumo was slowly finding ways to reduce the political power of Danzo and the other elders, actually sending them to the Suna war front as commanders. Naturally, it would seem like Sakumo was honoring them and strengthening their positions within the Konoha ranks by sending them to places where they can gain military merits, but he was also keeping them busy and out of in-village occurrences while being surrounded by ninjas that were loyal to Sakumo before them. Not to mention, ninja commanders, always picked from the elite of a village, often end up in the field themselves in order to maintain the respect of the subordinate nin as well as to suppress other elites, and when they do, the enemy goes for their throats. Add to that that Danzo is only considered an elite jonin, nothing compared to jinchuriki and kage, and that we probably eon's be able to turn Suna to our side no matter what we try, and, well… The problem might take care of itself.

I laughed myself silly when Orochimaru finally spilled the beans to us a week later since the other adults were futilely attempting to keep us out of it.

"Tsunade isn't pleased, but she knows the village comes first and she's willing to wait as long as she gets a shot at him," Orochimaru adds, while Kakashi and I do some chakra control exercises, currently balancing on two fingertips on a stream. "For now."

"Did you guys talk things out?" I ask, making him bristle, but I just huff at him. "Mah, don't be like that. I just wanna make sure you're okay. If she's upsetting you, Kakashi and I will defend your honor."

The snake man tries to sneer but his lips are fighting a smile too hard. "And what can you two fleas do against her, the Great Slug Princess."

I smirk. "I seem to remember us terrorizing you into submission."

"By threatening to urinate on my imported rugs," he mocks provocatively.

I shrug. "If it works, it works."

"I hate you."

"Lies."

XXXXXXXXXX

"Orochimaru is going to the front lines against Iwagakure and Akari and Kakashi are going with him."

I choke, coughing up my dango as Sakumo's words register, my dining room, filled with my parents, Akane-obacham, Shisui, Minato, Kushina, and the sannin all casually eating together goes silent in shock. "…What?"

Kushina had frozen, ramen only halfway in her mouth, her chopsticks still raised. Minato next to her makes a squeaking little wheeze. Meanwhile, my parents and Sakumo were the only ones at this little dinner that didn't seem shocked.

Tsunade, who had been lurking around her teammate, and therefore around my family, ever since she had returned to the village, has sake continuously overflowing from the cup she'd forgotten she'd been filling, but she is still the first to snap out of her shock. She roars in fury as she throws the sake bottle in her hand at the Snake Sannin's head. "You crazy fucker! You want to take these toddlers to fucking war?! The striped one isn't even old enough to go to the academy! Let me beat some sense into you!"

…Did she seriously just call me striped? I think incredulously, hand going to touch my silver streaked hair.

Our tsundere teacher smoothly dodges the sake, shooting the Senju princess an elegant yet disdainful glance. "Sakumo-sama has assigned me command of one of the camps. They will join me to continue their education seeing as I can't do it from across the lands, although they will remain in camp, just like the civilians there. Obviously." Orochi sniffs haughtily, a kimono sleeve gracefully hiding his lower face. "Your opinion of me remains at dirt level, I see."

The slug princess falters, looking contrite, but she just rallies, whirling on the Hatake and Uchiha Clan heads. "Still! Even if the camps are relatively safe, how are you okay with sending them there?!"

Minato settles a concerned hand on my back even as Shisui begins to tug on Kakadhi's sleeves, frowning. "Kashi? You and Riri-hime leaving? Kashi?"

My mother sighs, aura swirling with mixed emotions. "We believe Orochimaru-sama will protect and teach them well. Besides, Kakashi is already a genin and Akari-chan is not far behind in terms of ability. It's best if they get some experience."

I stare incredulously as I take in the contrast between my parents' emotions and Tsunade's. My parents… were sending me to a war camp, my mother resigned and a bit stressed, but like father, she was actually proud as well. Sakumo-ojisama, too, although he felt significantly more conflicted about it. For a moment, I wonder if I've misjudged their characters, or their insanity levels, but my father's next words as he speaks up has a wave of understanding washing over me.

"Hn. They are strong. We don't know what this war will bring, nor when it will end. They need to be prepared. Besides, Mikoto and I were only a bit older when we first went to war and Kakashi and Akari are already strong, not to mention neither of the children will be in combat. They will merely alternate a few weeks at the camp to maintain their training."

I blink. Oh. So it's not that they're shity parents, just that they're traumatized child soldiers and don't particularly see anything wrong with making us child soldiers too. In fact, they think they're helping us by preparing us early,

I examine Sakumo even as Minato begins to hesitantly object to my parents, his hands tight on my shoulders. The hokage's face is perfectly placid, but his knuckles were taught on his tea cup. Clearly, he had only very reluctantly agreed to this.

I slide my hand under the table to activate the privacy seals in the room, only Minato, and Akane-obachan, who had silently been watching from the corner with worried eyes, noticing, both of which are sensors who felt my chakra spike.

"So, does this perhaps have anything to do with wanting Kakashi and I out of the village due to a certain assasination attempt?" I guess blandly.

The room pauses once more, Tsunade, who had been holding my resigned father aloft by his collar with one arm and using the other to keep Orochimaru in a chokehold while she yells, whips her head towards Sakumo, amber eyes glaring. "Is Brat Number 1 right?!"

Sakumo lets out an almost reluctant chuckle, shaking his head. "Seriously, you geniuses are something else."

Kakashi and I turn our heads to look at one another, or appear to in my case since I'm blindfolded. Kakashi is upset, but I place a bracing hand on his shoulder. "Alright."

Kakashi scowls, grabbing my hand. "Riri, you can't be serious! They're sending us away because they think we're weak!"

"Pup, no!" Sakumo denies, quickly climbing to his feet from his floor cushion. In one smooth motion, he scoops Kakashi and I, and Shisui who had been latched onto us, all up and sets us in his lap. I huff, adjusting Shisui to rest against my chest, wrapping my arms around him securely so he isn't elbowing me as we sit on one leg while Kakashi sat on Sakumo's other one. I hide my smile into Shisui's beautiful little curls, his lacking the spiky edge of my own curls.

"Pup, we are sending you away so that you won't be hurt. You two are strong, but if you are here, we'll be too worried to focus on cleaning the village up of all its traitors," Sakumo says earnestly, and I admire his parenting skills for a moment as my best friend relaxes, snorting when Tsunade finally releases her hostages with a thump, still miffed, but somewhat mollified.

"They could be attacked in the war camp, though," Minato points out, fingers flexing nervously in his lap.

"Yeah, ya know. What's to stop that from happening as soon as they leave the protection of your clan compounds?" Kushina adds, anxiously slurping up half a bowl of ramen in one go. 

Sakumo shakes his head, leaning down to kiss Kakashi's white hair, before doing the same to my silver and black head, and even one to Shisui who giggles happily at not being left out, tugging on the Hokage's own long ponytail. "There are too many loyal ninja around for anyone to make a move, regardless of if it's an internal or external threat. It's the safest option."

Kakashi maintains his mulish pout for ten seconds longer before giving in, ducking his face deeper into his scarf. "…Hn."

I snort. He has seriously been spending way too much time with Uchiha.

XXXXXXXXXX

I lick the blood off of my finger as I finish signing, fighting the grin on my face. Next to me, Kakashi, Sakumo, and my parents are eagerly watching, The excitement in the air palpable around us. Since we were leaving the village soon, it was determined that having my own summons early was a priority so that I could communicate in emergencies and, in the worst case scenario, have additional help if we were attacked.

"Alright! Are you ready?" My mother says, picking up the summoning contract in front of me. I nod, but pause when I see everyone eagerly watching me. 

"Kashi, you, too."

My best friend blinks, cocking his head like a puppy. "Hn?"

The genin has a contract with the dogs, but rarely uses it due to the chakra cost. He has yet to inherit the wolf contract, the summons being reserved only for the leaders of the Hatake Clan after they became Jonin. Still, with glee surging in my veins, I want to share this experience with my partner in crime. I want my first summoning to be right alongside him, knowing in my bones that it will be the first of many when Kakashi and I will eventually end up fighting in the field, guarding each other's backs.

Always.

The masked boy seems to understand my inarticulable feelings. Perhaps he can feel it just like me, humming in his chest like a constellation of devotion and hope and promise. With matching grins, Kakashi and I nod, before throwing our gang signs.

I pour my chakra into the jutsu, carefully feeling the way the hand signs mold it so that I can complete the summoning without them later. Ordinarily, it isn't really safe for me to perform such a chakra intensive jutsu. Due to my age, my chakra stores were meager, especially my Yang or physical chakra. My chakra strings, since I didn't disperse them, were reusable and didn't cost anything beyond the initial creation. Medical ninjutsu is more control than anything, so I can use some of those, but other jutsu were off the table. Even my Great Fireball jutsu is really more like a candle lighter.

However, genjutsu and seals were my aces since, due to my reincarnation status, my Yin or spitball chakra is off the charts. Most jutsu required a mix of Yin and Yang, the latter of which I barely had any of, but anything Yin is my bitch and summoning jutsu were also more Yin chakra then anything, I could manage at least a small summoning.

There are two puffs of smoke and from them appears a small pug, and a huge Mainecoon looking cat.

I smile, with me standing, we are almost the same height. "Hello. I'm Akari. I'd be honored to work with the cats and I hope to earn the privilege."

The cat, a pure black male littered with scars, peers at me with bright gold eyes, the sight captured in by sharingan. He is silky and solemn eyed, perfectly still as he watches me. "Hello, hime. We've been waiting for you. I am Touya."

"Thank you for coming, Touya-sama," I say respectfully. The cat in front of me is giving off very distinguished vibes, a scar scratching horizontally across his face above his nose. My instincts tell me he is a warrior, and a higher ranked member of the cat summoning clan. 

Touya purrs in pleasure. "You're welcome, Kitten, but no need to be so formal. Now, tell me, why should we allow you to be our summoner?"

I pause. "Hn. I want to be a cat summoner because you guys are amazing. You're powerful and clever creatures, and your abilities compliment mine. You're noble and dignified summons. But, I don't really know what would make me worthy of you. Perhaps you could tell me what you were looking for in a summoner?"

Touya suddenly looks very smug, an oddly expressive look despite the fact it's on a cat face. "You are worthy."

I blink, confused.

Touya promptly saunters over, brushing up against me and knocking me flat on my butt. "You recognize the greatness of the felines. Therefore, you are worthy. We can trust a summoner like you to not view us as disposable or weak even though we are not usually front line powerhouses."

I bite my lip, holding in explosive laughter as I realize that I inadvertently passed the cat's test by flattering their egos. "I see. Thank you."

I lift a hand to touch his face, waiting patiently until he presses it against my palm in acceptance, before flicking off my sharingan, extending my senses to watch Kakashi and the pug where they were discussing nearby. After a moment, Kakashi scoops the pug up and brings him over, making it my first substantial meeting with the summon. "Riri, this is Pakun. Pakun, my best friend, Akari. She's pack."

"Yo!" Pakun deadpans, voice hilariously deep as he offers me a paw to shake. "Nice meeting ya, pup."

I smile. "Hello, Pakun. Your paw pads are very soft. This is Touya! Touya, this is Kakashi, one of my most precious people, okay? So let's all get along."

Touya huffs, tail flicking the back of my head as he settles at my side. "Mutts, huh?"

Oh, dear.

Pakun bares his teeth, raising his pudgy cheeks. "Better than being a fur ball."

"Flea bag."

"Overgrown rug."

"Dumbass tail-chasers."

"Lazy bastards."

"Slobbering mongrel."

Pakun reels, the pug not so discreetly licking at his muzzle, which was, admittedly, a bit wet. Looks like an insecurity just got jabbed at.

"Unfeeling psycho."

Oh, that one hit Touya just as hard. Damn. I glance away from the now hissing cat to Kakashi a bit helplessly, but he looks just as lost.

The tiny pug and giant house cat glare at one another for a minute, tension crackling in the air before they abruptly toss their heads back and laugh. Kakashi and I gape as our summons cackle goodnaturedly. Mama and Sakumo were snickering as well. 

"Heh. Don't you kids know that the rivalry between cats and dogs is just friendly?" Pakun says, chuckling deeply as Touya keeps his head raised haughtily even as the two shake paws. "Actually, the mammals' clans tend to be on good terms generally."

I pout. "What's with the show then?"

Touya gives a tiny grin, and apparently he isn't as solemn a cat as I'd originally thought. "Your little faces were cute"

Kakashi and I share exasperated looks as our parents and summons laughs at us.

XXXXXXXXXX

"You're pretty good for a pint sized infant," Tsunade grumbles as she peers over my shoulder as I heal the small scabbed over cuts on the patient in front of me.

The slug sannin had barged into my house at ass o'clock, scooped me up under her arm like a ball before kidnapping me and yelling to my befuddled and startled parents that she was taking me for the day.

Currently, she's watching me heal some already scabbed over cuts so as not to trigger her hemophobia. Shizune, the niece of her deceased fiance, is also with us, Tsunade having decided to take her in when she found out her parents had recently died in battle.

"You're pretty talented for a drunken gambler," I deadpan back, wondering why all the sannin were terrible at communication and praise.

"You little-"

Shizune, already showing the talent of mediation and soothing others, quickly and adorably begins trying to coax the angry blond. "Tsunade-hime! Akari-chan is so little! She doesn't know any better!"

"Doesn't know any better?! This sharp tongued little shit is a genius! Don't let her cute face fool you!"

I flick my curls over my shoulder. "Hn."

Tsunade snatches me by the scruff of my collar and lifts me to eye level as she marches out of the patient room and into the hall. I swing there calmly, wondering if Hiruzen used to do this to all the sannin, so now they think this is how you're supposed to hold children because both Tsunade and Orochimaru keep doing this to me. Suddenly serious, Tsunade gazes at my masked face with amber eyes. "Oi…"

"Hn?"

"Should I take you as my disciple?"

I cross my arms, swinging in the air leisurely as I consider the offer, only a bit surprised. "Mah, I want to learn medical ninjutsu, but I have no intention of neglecting other combat arts. And I will be studying under Orochimaru-sensei as well as others. I'm also not particularly interested in learning how to heal things like illness that don't result from battle, at least not now since I need to get strong enough to protect myself first. I'm not sure you'll be fine with that."

Tsunade considers me before settling me down and placing her hands on her hips, leaning forward to look down at me, nearly smacking me in the head with her bust. "There are three main rules for medical ninjas; one, a medical ninja shall never stop medical treatment until the lives of their party members have come to an end. Two, no medic ninja shall ever stand on the front lines. Three, no medic ninja shall ever die until they are the last of their platoon. But, there is a fourth, secret rule. Only those medical ninja who have mastered the Byakugō no In, the Strength of a Hundred Technique, or Sōzō Saisei, the ninja art of Creation Rebirth, are permitted to discard the above-mentioned laws. I think you have the potential to become a front line medic."

I sigh. "I can't abide by the second, third, and fourth rule." Tsunade goes to protest, outraged, but I raise my hand to halt her tirade. "I understand why you wrote the rules like that, but isn't prevention just as important as treatment in the medical world?" 

Tsunade reels at my words, eyes going wide as I continue. "I also think that there are other strong techniques that can turn the tide of a battle other than just Creation Rebirth and the Strength of a Hundred Technique, especially because you're the only one to ever master them and you've never taught them. Yes, they allow you to regenerate everything to the point of immortality, but what about techniques that make you impossible to hit in the first place? Whose to say which makes one more qualified to stand on the front line? I believe that anyone with strong enough techniques should fight to protect our comrades, even if we prioritize healing. I'm sorry, Tsunade-hime. I can't agree with your ideology."

Unlike earlier, this time I speak with utter sincerity and respect, bowing slightly because in reality, I truly did respect the last Senju. But while I understand, I can't agree. Looking her in the eye, I finish my declaration. "Whether I know Inyo-ninjutsu or not, I will not leave my comrades to fight without me."

There is a moment of silence before Tsunade barks out a sudden laugh. "You're the most audacious kid I've ever met! But you've got guts and a good head on your shoulders, and you've raised some interesting points that I've never considered. Alright, I'll make a bet with you. Learn any one of my techniques and I'll teach you whatever you want without making you follow my rules. But if you don't learn it before you leave to the war camp, you have to become a proper medical ninja and follow all my rules."

I pause, doing a fast cost-benefit analysis and checking my chakra reserves. Knowing I'm at 75 percent full, I flick my Mangekyō Sharingan on under my mask for just one second, time distorting to hours inside my dojutsu as I quickly look for favorable outcomes like the smug cheater that I am. Then, I smirk. "I'll take that bet. Show me how to do your superstrength." 

Tsunade scoffs, incredulous. "You think you can learn my chakra enhanced strength in a week? Do you even know what kind of control that takes?"

I dismiss her words with a lazy flick of my hand. "Well, control is my strength. Besides, I don't really have the chakra to use another one of your techniques."

She grunts. "Well, I can't say you don't have a point there. Come on then."

She snatches Shizune and I up, setting each of us on her hips before leaping out the nearest window. A bit of tree and roof hopping later, and I dizzily found myself in a training ground.

"Alright, watch carefully." Tsunade smirks, throwing her haori for Shizune to catch before striding up to a boulder. I check my reserves, wincing as I feel only 25% left now, and just as she reels her arm back, I lift my mask and flash my sharingan, watching and imprinting the way her chakra moves into my memory as she smashes her fist into the boulder.

The thing fucking explodes, shards and rubble flying from the impact of Tsunade's punch and I hurriedly shut my dojutsu off, plopping to the ground to hide my exhaustion as my chakra reserves drop again. The noise is thunderous and Shizune's shriek echoes, a few trees behind the boulder even getting wrecked from the wind pressure alone. 

A trembling Shizune collapses next to me, clutching the green haori as Tsunade turns back to us, smug.

I offer her a polite round of applause. "Incredible."

I feel the vein beginning to bulge in her forehead. "Are you being sarcastic right now, you insolent little shit?!"

I tilt my head innocently. "No, of course not."

Tsunade snarls, stomping over, and I have to fight a smile at how energetic she looks, the emptiness and despair that lingered around her abating in her anger. "I can't tell if your fucking with me! You may be an Uchiha, but you're too young to wear such a blank face!"

"Hn," I reply indifferently, making Tsunade frustratedly toss a tree past me, something I calmly ignore along with Shizune's yelp. "Can you show me a few more times?"

Scowling, she obliges, and I watch the way her chakra fluctuates. I begin to analyze her, remembering the sight of her chakra when I used my special peepers while simultaneously sensing the way she pours chakra into her fist, concentrating it into a dense point of impact, and then releasing it forcefully from her tenketsu when she makes contact.

"Again."

Boom!

"Again."

Smash!

"Again."

Crack!

"Aga-"

"I'M NOT A DANCING MONKEY!" Tsunade screams, throwing another tree, just above Shizune and I. I feel internal glee as she shows more and more emotion. Now it's only a matter of time before she can heal.

It's a relief.

That said, my new sensei's temper was even worse than the last one. I kind of feel bad for Jiraiya now, honestly. "Hn. Stingy. Whatever, I think I got it."

Tsunade twitches. "You really think you can get my technique in a week? You're a seriously prideful little kid, ya know that?"

I shrug. "The hard part of this is control. Anyone with enough can enhance their strength. It's how taijutsu works. All your doing is taking it up to a level most can't manage. But one again, my control is all I've got going for me right now. Plus, I'm a sensor and now know what to do."

"You're a WHAT?" Abruptly, Tsunade seems to have realized this won't be as easy a bet as she anticipated, but considering how terrible her luck is, she really should have seen that coming.

I walk to a tree, and for a few minutes, I just stand there, pushing my chakra into my fist and concentrating it until it feels like enough. It's hot, perhaps due to my chakra natures of fire and lightning, and my fist stiffens up, but the density feels right. I return the chakra back to its normal, even flow. Then I try again and again, accumulating it, concentrating on it, and then letting it go. 

"Any day now," Tsunade sings, but I just ignore her, leaving Shizune to play peacekeeper when she loses her temper again. Once I get used to the strange but not quite painful feeling in my veins, I reel my fist back and smash it into the tree as I try to force the chakra out of the tenketsu on my knuckles.

The results are both successful and not.

The tree shatters, bark flying everywhere as it topples, but several bones in my hand also break, my punch having been mistimed so that I made contact before releasing the chakra out, meaning my hand took the full damage of punching a tree. I also realize that I forgot to reinforce my hand with chakra. That's not even mentioning how much smaller my explosion was.

"Ahhh…." I mumble, unable to stop the tears of pain in my eyes from falling as I turn to a Tsunade whose soul seems to have been ejected from her body, showing her my heavily bruised fist. "Sensei, it hurts."

Tsunade and Shizune's disbelieving screams are loud in the forest as the sannin heals my broken hand.

XXXXXXXXXX

AN; Sorry, I know it's kind of filler, but bear with me, we are going to war next chapter.

Also! Please note that Touya's name, in this context, means or night in references to his black fur and yellow eyes, like a night sky full of stars. All OC names have important meanings so if your ever curious, look them up or comment asking me about them 💙 Anyway, please comment what you liked or want to see more of!