Chapter 25

When we got Valin's drink, he spent two full minutes testing it to be sure it was correct—and refused to speak to the barista, even when she told him to have a nice day. Everyone in the store was giving us annoyed looks. I just wanted to go home.

Once we were outside, Valin's composure dropped and he started blushing.

"Now that I think about it... that cashier was really cute. I can't believe I even spoke to her." He sounded proud of himself. He shouldn't be. I can see why RJ refused to come with him.

"I think I'll just get it delivered next time," he said, sipping his drink.

"If you could do that, why did you make us go through all this trouble?!" I raised my voice, and Valin's eyes filled with tears.

"I'm sorry... It costs a lot more to get it delivered and... I wanted to spend time with my friend..." He was staring straight at me. Valin's features were more childlike than Zai's—big, round eyes—and we were almost the same height. I instantly felt bad for yelling.

Zai punched Valin's arm and he yelped, nearly dropping his drink.

"I need you to revise that apology—and mean it this time," Zai said coldly.

Valin relaxed, wiped his face, and gave me a more serious look.

"I'm really sorry, Snowe... for, uh, troubling you and embarrassing you when I didn't need to."

He realized he embarrassed me?!

"You noticed I was embarrassed?" I asked, trying to understand.

Valin nodded. "Yeah... I just didn't care. But I care now! I really, really care now!"

…I want to punch him too.

We got home and Valin placed his cup on the coffee table, then curled up on the living room sofa to sleep.

He drinks all that caffeine and then just passes out?!

"Snowe," Zai called.

"Yes?!" I answered, startled. He kissed my forehead and said,

"You should sleep. I have some stuff to take care of, so go to our room for now."

Our room…

"Okay, I will." I agreed, and then he turned and walked out the same door we'd just come through.

Raijian walked into the room at that moment and glared at Valin.

"Hey," I greeted.

He waved half-heartedly. "I've been wanting to talk to you... and apologize. You told me staying here would be uncomfortable because you knew how your brothers were... and I misjudged your intentions. I accused you of being jealous. I was wrong."

"Stop that," Rai said firmly. Then he looked at me and quickly looked away, a little sadly. "Let's talk… in the dining room."

He led the way. Zai said he trusted Rai, and I knew he wouldn't have left me alone if I needed to worry, so I followed.

"First of all, I hate apologies," Rai admitted as I sat down. He can't lie, so he must mean it. My first instinct was to say sorry again, so I bit my lip.

"When I first saw you… I read your thoughts. And when I learned your story, I thought you'd be annoying to have around." I sulked. "But I like how you rarely lie—and when you do, it's because you're overly considerate. Still... I kept feeling like you'd disappear one day, since you just came out of nowhere anyway, and I wasn't willing to put in any effort to protect you. So I told you to leave... I had no idea Zai had gotten so attached, already."

I played with my wedding ring under the table but stayed quiet so he'd keep talking.

"I can never tell what he's thinking. So I figured his attraction to you would go away soon enough, and you'd leave. I didn't want to get attached to someone who could just slip into another timeline by accident... Anyway, my point is: don't apologize to me, ever. If you think you did something wrong, make it up to me—and do better."

"I'll do better," I said quickly.

Rai sighed, like he wasn't impressed with my answer.

"I'm surprised he'd put himself at risk like that for you... That mark on your finger—do you know what it means?"

"It's a marriage mark or something, right?" I pulled off my ring and looked at the silver mark on my finger. It had changed colors and was now reflective.

"On Afaria, that mark has different implications than marriage. It means he's tethered his soul to yours. It also means that your enemies are now his enemies. I'm sure anyone who sees it would react differently than if it were just a ring. My father has over two thousand wives—and none of them have that mark. Do you know why?"

I shook my head.

Rai smiled softly and patted my head. "To him, they're replaceable. But to Zai—you're not. That mark can't be removed. It can only be given to one person in his entire life. I knew he'd never let you go the moment I saw it."

I looked down at my finger. He can't ever give this to someone else? Divorce is rare on Infaniya, but not impossible. Even my father moved on eventually.

"What would happen if Zai fell in love with someone else?" I asked.

"Oh... he would die. Being apart from you for longer than a year is a death sentence—because you're a part of him now. More accurately, you own a part of him that he can't live without."

I gasped and stood up. "This is what the tether signifies."

I felt like the room was spinning.

"You'll live though. He didn't take anything from you in this arrangement. Aren't you lucky?" Rai said bitterly. Then he got up and left to kick Valin off the couch and send him to his own room.

After thinking alone for a while, I headed to Zai's room and sat in his desk chair, lost in thought. Then I remembered the question he asked me—before Cera's attack.

"When you're with Rai, what is the most prevalent thing on your mind?"

When I first saw Zai, our eyes met. I felt like we stared at each other forever, but thinking back, it couldn't have been more than a second. Even though I felt indebted to RJ, I felt more comfortable with Zai—and I went along with whatever he asked. And when I was alone with RJ… there was only one thing on my mind.

Of course, any man with pride would've given up on being with me.

I fell asleep in the chair before Zai came back, but I woke up in bed next to him the next morning. I wonder where he went all night...

Usually, I would hold back, but today I kissed him, which woke him up instantly.

"Stop... you have to work today," he said sleepily.

I laughed and said, "Alright... I'll behave. Zai, what is marriage to you?" I asked.

His eyebrows rose. "What do you mean?"

"I mean... is it like marriage on Infaniya?"

He frowned. "I doubt the stuck-up assholes on your planet would recognize what we have as legitimate. So no."

Then he sat up and started getting dressed. "I'll drive you to the studio. But I can't stay today," he added.

"Wait! Why?" I sat up too.

"Weren't you just saying I didn't need to come? I realized I have some things I need to do anyway. Enjoy your time without me."

I never cleared up the misunderstanding! I felt a twinge of panic as I asked,

"Are you upset with me?"

"No, silly," Zai said with a soft laugh. "I took some extra measures, so there's nothing to worry about. Plus, there's not much they can do to you—as long as you remember to communicate. I'm not upset at all."

"Then answer me… what are your intentions with me? I mean... why put yourself at risk?"

He hummed. "Oh, you've been talking to Rai. Get dressed, then we'll talk in the car."

I reluctantly left the room and headed into my old room to find something to wear. I didn't like it. The temperature was the same, but it felt cold and empty. Like I was afraid I'd end up moving back in here—alone.

As promised, Zai started talking as soon as we were in the car.

"I feel like this is a heavy subject to bring up first thing in the morning."

"I'm sorry."

"As you should be," he said with a laugh. Then he moved one hand from the wheel and brushed his fingers against my cheek. "I'd stopped feeling before I met you. Sometimes I had good times with Rai, but... it was different because... well, that doesn't matter. I just don't want to be with anyone else. I want to protect you, work with you... and I'd hate seeing you end up loving someone else so much... that that would kill me anyway. So why not take the risk and bind with you the first chance I got? There's no risk for me—if I'd die regardless."

"I don't want anyone else! You didn't have to be so reckless," I said, defensively.

Zai scoffed. "You used to flirt with Rai all the time."

"When?!"

"You told Rai you appreciated the fish he caught," he said mockingly.

…That was so long ago. He actually remembered that?

"That wasn't even flirting!" I argued.

We pulled up to the studio. Before I got out of the car, I added,

"And I can answer you now—whenever I was alone with RJ, I was thinking about you. Wondering where you were and missing you. You're not the only crazy one... I'm crazy about you too!"

Zai stared at me blankly.

Suddenly embarrassed, I yelled, "Bye!" and rushed out of the car.

…I didn't need to say all that, huh.