The Fool

The principal's office was draped in an austere silence, punctuated only by the rhythmic tapping of the principal's fingers against the polished mahogany table. Yuuto was sitting on the opposite end of the table, his expression, a canvas of boredom mixed with a tinge of defiance, contrasted starkly against the principal's stern demeanor. The principal, an older man with lines of experience etched into his face, regarded the 19-year-old with a look of utter annoyance, his eyes narrowing slightly as he exhaled a deep, weary sigh.

"You do realize why you're here, Mr. Sakurai?" the principal's voice, firm yet tinged with an undertone of frustration, broke the silence.

"Yes, sir," Yuuto responded, his voice almost dragging, as his gaze shifted away, seemingly fixated on a nondescript point in the room.

The pause that followed was heavy, laden with unspoken reprimands.

"...Do you have anything to say for yourself?" the principal prodded, his eyes boring into Yuuto, searching for a hint of remorse.

"Not really. Won't happen again though. Also, my grades are great, and they will stay that way regardless of my absence," Yuuto replied, his tone nonchalant, almost dismissive.

The principal leaned back in his chair, a sigh escaping his lips as he prepared to deliver a familiar lecture.

"Mr. Sakurai. School, and this school in particular, isn't a place you only need to submit your grades in and leave. It is a place where--"

Yuuto's thoughts, however, were already miles away, his inner monologue laced with sarcasm.

'Ah, man - here it is. The F Class technique of how honorable they are and how shite I am for not attending for a whole month. I get it. Can this baldy get it over with..?' Yuuto mused silently, his gaze still diverted. His short hair itching beneath the wig.

"--Thus. I can't pass this without a punishment," the principal finally concluded, his voice carrying a finality that demanded attention.

Yuuto's eyes flickered back to the principal, a mix of resignation and curiosity in his gaze.

"And punishment I'll take. What is it? Homestay?" Yuuto inquired, his voice carrying a hint of challenge.

The principal paused, his eyes narrowing slightly. "Were it any other student, that would be it - in addition to involving your relatives."

The air in the room seemed to thicken with anticipation, the principal's words hanging heavily between them, hinting at a consequence far beyond the ordinary.

Yuuto's expression shifted into a deeper frown. His body language screamed defiance, a stark contrast to the principal's measured, if increasingly exasperated, demeanor.

"But considering this is you, Mr. Sakurai, I've concocted a different plan to punish you," the principal said, his tone suggesting a mix of sternness and a hint of cunning.

"Sure, whatever," Yuuto muttered, his voice dripping with indifference.

'Just get it over with...' he thought, his mind racing with the desire to escape the confines of the office.

"... You are to join a club. Let it be... The Student Council. And have perfect attendance at every meeting they have. Knowing them, their stern and strict mindset should change your attitude right up and set you on a righteous path that every grown adult strives to--" the principal declared.

"EW, NO." Yuuto's response was immediate and visceral, his brows furrowing in stark refusal.

'And have that snotty cuckold-maker reign over me? No chance in a cold hell. I can already see her snickering about like some demon, masquerading itself as a little princess laughing at some peasant who is just trying to earn an honest living, while ordering me around. She and my sister would make great friends.'

Doesn't that analogy make you a lowly peasant? It seems Yuuto is finally becoming self-aware of how low in life he really is, and how much of an outcast no aristocrat would invite, ever.

'Oh? Someone's spirited today, I see.'

"Hm. Harsh. Baseball club, then? You seem like a timid young man, so an outdoor experience would-"

"NO."

'Although that does sound appealing... I can't afford to stand out,' Yuuto thought to himself, wrestling internally with the allure of the sport and his desire for anonymity.

'Also, timid?' Even Yuuto was dumbfounded.

"Arts club? Maybe bring out the inner world that is hidden within you would spark a desire to pursue-"

"Best I can (want to) draw is a stickman."

"Ehm... Swimming?"

"For pussies."

"Table Tennis, then. A sport that can be played indoors-"

"For dry pussies."

The principal's frustration was palpable, his patience visibly wearing thin.

"Kendo? It's the manliest, most honorable activity that our school prides itself on-"

"NO CHANCE."

'I ain't letting that naive kid dictate my life,' Yuuto reaffirmed to himself, his resolve hardening.

"Then, what about--"

The conversation continued in this vein, a tiresome back-and-forth that traversed the spectrum of the school's clubs.

"Mr. Sakurai," The principal sighed as he clasped his hands, "You force my hand here. You must join a club to graduate." The principal emphasized as he looked out the window - a beautiful day that was. Not a cloud in sight despite the downfall a few days ago. "This is what you want, is it not?"

Yuuto, as if mimicking the principal's looseness, leaned back in his seat as he faced the principal.

"Then, let me graduate without a club."

"I cannot do that. Not even to gifted students. These ones even put in extra work when it comes to school activities in clubs... Besides," The principal faced Yuuto once more, placing both of his hands clasped together on the table as he gazed into Yuuto's eyes, "I'm afraid you won't be truly graduating that way. You want an unfair advantage over everyone?"

"Hmph," Yuuto furrowed his brows as he looked away, "... I don't need an unfair advantage. Everyone else sucks in their own way." He muttered in a casual manner - as if it was simply a fact to be stated.

The principal blinked, seeking his attention as he shuffled in his seat, leaning more of his weight on the table, "Then, work with me here. I do not want you to have a regretful last year."

"...."

'I suppose it's either me accepting his offer or him forcing it on me. It will come down to it. Whatever. He was lenient enough to let me refuse clubs I wouldn't wanna join. I'll get into some rundown club that there ain't much to do.'

Yuuto took a deep breath, before tilting back his head to face the principal, "Fine."

"Excellent." The principal smirked warmly, "Now... If I'm not mistaken, the last club is... The Culture Club."

"Culture club?" Yuuto echoed, his tone laced with a mixture of disbelief and resignation.

"Yes, the culture club. They're responsible for setting up events," the principal explained, his voice reflecting a sense of finality, as if this was the last card he had to play.

Yuuto's mind raced, processing this new information. 'Oh? So like festivals? I bet they're a bunch of bums who never show up anyway. It's gonna be the case twofold during the last 5 months... Worst case, I'll work on setting up some fireworks or class decorations, and dip.' he thought, a cynical smirk playing on his lips at the thought of outsmarting the system.

"I'll take it," he finally said, his voice carrying a note of reluctant acceptance, as if conceding to a game he had no intention of playing seriously.

"Splendid... I'll notify their president," the principal responded, a trace of relief in his tone.

"Who's that?"

------------LATER----------

'The Culture Club room... That's where it is, isn't it?'

Yuuto navigated the labyrinthine corridors of the school, a sense of detachment in his stride. The whispers of his classmates, branding him as the 'anime pillow guy' and 'the weirdo of class 1', swirled around him like a dissonant chorus. Unfazed, he finally arrived at the club room and slid the door open.

Inside, the room buzzed with activity from four students, two girls and two guys, absorbed in various tasks. Among them, a familiar face...

"Oh, Sakurai! It's you!" Shun, moving a box, called out.

'Great, just my luck. The cuck from Student Council with his fantasy girlfriend...' Yuuto's thoughts soured as he spun on his heel, ready to leave as swiftly as he had arrived. But his exit was halted by a sudden, gentle grasp on his arm.

'What the—' He whirled around, his face a mask of annoyance. 'Who's got a death wish?'

"Ah! You must be Sakurai-senpai! Nice to meet you. I'm Sato Shizume, a second-year. And, well, your club president," the student spoke with a blend of eagerness and courtesy.

Yuuto's gaze landed on the boy before him. Sato Shizume was notably short, almost childlike in stature, with silky, short dark hair that shimmered under the sun's rays filtering into the room. His ocean-blue eyes sparkled with a mix of excitement and innocence, making him appear fragile, almost breakable – the kind of person Yuuto instinctively disliked.

'Focus, Yuuto. You're not dealing with gang members now. This is school, and there's a guard outside,' he reminded himself, trying to shake off the residual tension from the earlier fight.

Sato Shizume was known as a diligent peacemaker, universally kind. Rumor had it that even those who initially bullied him for his height ended up being charmed into friendship. He was a figure who effortlessly garnered popularity, perhaps even outshining Riko in that regard. Yuuto had never interacted with him personally, but his reputation was unmistakable.

Yuuto observed Sato with a critical eye. 'Just a coward then, his punch lacking any real force. His arsenal? Mere words and charming gestures. A weakling, no doubt about it. I've even seen him being all polite and nice to scum like male1 and male2, totally clueless about their true colors. No magic, no grandeur about him; just adept at masking his true self. A manipulator, a liar, and self-centered to the core. Harmless for now, but with his popularity, I expected more followers in this club. Strange.'

"Call me Sakurai. I'll be in your care," he replied informally, eyeing Sato's extended hand for a handshake.

As Sato's thin fingers lingered in the air, a thought crossed Yuuto's mind. 'So fragile... I could snap him like a twig. Accidentally kill this guy just by—'

His thought abruptly cut off, his gaze fixed on an inconsequential spot on the wooden floor. A fleeting, recent memory, flashed through his mind, vanishing as quickly as it appeared.

"Oh? Is something the matter, Senpai? You seem distracted," Sato inquired, concern furrowing his brows.

Yuuto, realizing his prolonged silence, shifted his gaze back to Sato. "I was just thinking how you have a girl's name. I bet you're the type prisoners look for when they're horny."

The room fell into a stunned silence, all eyes turning toward Yuuto and Sato.

Shun, visibly appalled, exclaimed, "Sakurai, that's a new low, even for you! Sato-kun was just being nice!"

"Yeah, what's your problem?! Apologize to Sato-san!" Chiyoko Aizawa, a petite first-year with pink ponytails, demanded, abandoning her chores.

Sato, ever the peacemaker, raised his arms in a gesture of calm. "Now, now, it wasn't that bad of an—"

"Sakkun, shut up," a tall girl with long blonde hair interjected, stepping forward. She elegantly placed her finger on Sato's lips, silencing him. Sato looked up at her, momentarily lost for words. She towered over him, a head or two taller.

Hiyori Minase, a third-year student, then turned her attention towards Yuuto, her presence commanding.

"Sakurai, right? If you're going to keep this up, you're out. I won't stand for anyone talking about Sakkun like that in my presence," Hiyori asserted, her gaze piercing into Yuuto with a controlled yet fiery intensity.

Yuuto, slightly tilting his head back, felt an unexplained surge of irritation. 'She's really getting on my nerves for some reason... Tsche. Think, say something sharp.'

"So I'll just save it for when you're not around," he retorted coolly.

The room fell into a stunned silence, the air thick with surprise.

"Are you 5?" Hiyori's bewilderment replaced her earlier anger, her head tilting in disbelief.

YES.

Yuuto mentally congratulated himself, smugly crafting another 5-year old's comeback. "I have a JOB, sasquatch."

The reaction was immediate. Shun winced, experiencing second-hand embarrassment, while Chiyoko seemed to shrink in on herself, her stomach twisting uncomfortably.

"How... How does that even—"

"Ahhh... Okay, okay...! Let's calm down, both of you," Sato interjected, stepping in between Hiyori and Yuuto with a gentle push and a disarming smile.

"Sakkun! Are you really going to let this weirdo talk to you like that?" Hiyori protested.

"Yes, Sato. Are you?" Yuuto echoed, adding to her challenge.

Dude, just stop...

"Hicchi... Trust me, I've got this," Sato assured her, his gaze meeting hers with a quiet confidence.

Hiyori looked away, a faint blush coloring her cheeks. "F-fine... If you say so. Just... don't let him get to you. You're too nice to him, even after that insult... Dummy..."

Sato chuckled, his smile unwavering, "Thanks, Hicchi. I can handle it."

Turning back to Yuuto, his demeanor remained relaxed, "Haha, yeah, I do have a bit of a girly name. My parents wanted a girl, so I guess they channeled some of that wish into my name."

The tension in the room seemed to dissolve with Sato's words, his presence diffusing the situation like a gentle spring breeze.

Before Yuuto could respond, Shun chimed in, "Sato-kun, it's pointless with this guy. Some people are just beyond reasoning."

Chiyoko chimed in, her voice tinged with earnestness. "Yeah! People talk about you all the time, Sato-san! They even came up with a nickname for you because of your naive nature!"

'You don't even know me, shitty brat.'

Sato turned sharply, his eyes widening in surprise and curiosity. "Really? They made a nickname for me? That's so cool! What is it?"

His innocent enthusiasm was palpable, and Chiyoko, caught off-guard by his reaction, blushed deeply, turning her head away.

"It's, um, the... the Ov—" she stammered, unable to finish.

"The Overly Hopeful Fool," Hiyori interjected, her voice steady as she crossed her arms.

"Whoa, that's kinda cool! Like a nickname an anime protagonist would get!" Sato exclaimed, his eyes sparkling, unfazed by the less-than-flattering moniker.

Yuuto, watching this unfold, rolled his eyes and thought, '...Wow.'

"How is that cool, you dummy?" Hiyori muttered, dragging her palm across her forehead in exasperation. Yet, despite her words, a reluctant smirk tinged with blush crept onto her lips, as if Sato's infectious cheer was seeping into her too.

"OOOH! You're into anime too, Sato-kun?" Shun eyes lit up as he eagerly approached Sato. "What's your favorite anime? Mine's Hintama! It's hilarious!" 

"Eh? Haha, I'm what you'd call a normie... Mine's Dragon Brawl Supreme." Sato replied.

The room buzzed with animated chatter, and Chiyoko murmured to herself, "This feels like an anime convention..."

Yuuto, somewhat relieved to be out of the spotlight, thought, 'At least I'm not the center of attention anymore. Sato's manipulations did good for me, it seems. You ain't getting baseball'd today.'

"Oh, right, right! Sakurai-senpai, I need you to book us a trip to Kyoto, find a hotel for students from years 1 to 3, make reservations two months in advance, and use the budget box to buy bullet-train tickets," Sato suddenly said, turning to Yuuto.

"Hold on, Sato. This is the Culture Club, right? Since when does planning trips fall under our duties?"

Sato blinked innocently. "Oh, didn't the principal tell you? When I joined last year, I felt the club wasn't doing enough. So I talked to the principal, and--"

Yuuto's heart sank. "--And you moved to a different club...?" he asked, a glimmer of hope in his voice.

"Nope! I made a deal with the principal to plan all school and field trips, in addition to our events, and manage our budget! I just added those responsibilities to our club!"

Yuuto muttered under his breath, "Typical teacher's pet..."

"What was that, senpai?" He asked, raising his brow and turning his ear to Yuuto to ear better.

"He sneezed." "I sneezed. 'How considerate of you,' I said." Yuuto and Shun looked at each other with a nod.

Internally, Yuuto fumed, 'That bald, fat principal really duped me. Next time I see him, he's getting a piece of my mind.'

Somewhere, the principal laughed and sneezed at the same time.

'I now realize why this club doesn't have a lot of members despite the president being Sato... It's because the president is SATO.'