Chapter 23. March 22, 1898

"Tell me more about us," Sebastian murmured softly, his gaze fixed on the dancing flames in the fireplace. He lay on the couch, resting his head on Ominis' lap, afraid to move and disrupt the fragile tranquility he felt now. Of all the things Ominis had shared with him, he truly remembered only certain individual episodes, but each time they were so vivid and warm that he was willing to listen to him for hours for the sake of such flashes. He was slightly wary of the fact that all the transformed memories were overly positive; he felt that it couldn't be like that. He hadn't ended up in Azkaban for leading a happy life, after all. But he hadn't yet mustered the courage to ask about it directly, as even the attempt to mentally return to what he had done turned the room around him into a hellish cauldron of pain, and his body into a sorrowful pulsating mass of blood and flesh. And he couldn't stop it the way he used to; Ominis had removed all potentially dangerous items from the room and tried not to leave him alone for too long.

"On our fifth year, we stayed together for the first time during the winter holidays at Hogwarts. It was amazing; the school was practically empty, and we could go to Hogsmeade every day and stay up late. I really want to know how you managed to get red currant rum for Christmas, but now I probably won't find out," Ominis' cheeks slightly reddened as he smiled and reached for his glass of whiskey. In the entire past month, he hadn't mentioned once that their relationship wasn't entirely friendly by the time Sebastian was locked up in Azkaban. He didn't know how to choose his words in a way that would make Sebastian remember at least some details from their shared memories, to stir his feelings even slightly, because he wasn't sure if they could build something as beautiful again from scratch without that foundation. He was afraid that if Sebastian, who wasn't feeling the same way about him now, learned about their past, it would push him away and destroy what they had been trying to build brick by brick this whole month. Of course, more difficult conversations were ahead, but this one seemed the most crucial to Ominis because such feelings would help Sebastian share the pain of more dramatic memories with him instead of facing it alone once again.

"Yeah, it seems I was quite the school rule-breaker," Sebastian chuckled, listening to the warm feeling of vague recognition within himself, "and then we got drunk and did something silly, didn't we?"

"Well, not exactly silly," Ominis murmured, taking a deep breath, ready to recount one of the most memorable evenings of his life, "we played a Muggle game of 'Truth or Dare,' a rather pointless but fun thing, and you were the one who suggested playing it, by the way."

"Seems like I even remember the rules. You either have to tell the absolute truth in response to a question or do a dare?" Sebastian shifted, making himself more comfortable. It was astonishing how pleasant and easy it felt to lie beside another person, to touch them, to listen to their voice. He had almost forgotten what it was like. Or was it because this person was Ominis, in particular?

"And why is your memory so selectively daft?" Ominis lightly touched Sebastian's hair with his fingertips, so gently that he wouldn't even notice. A soft, embarrassed smile returned to his face, "we used to come up with all sorts of nonsense, I won't even go into it. And then, you dared me to..." his words suddenly got stuck in his throat, even though he was sure he would say them as calmly as everything else. It began to feel like they were reliving that wonderful moment all over again, and he felt a blush creeping up his cheeks.

"To kiss me?" he said, causing Ominis to startle and bring the glass to his lips. Sebastian turned onto his back, looking at Ominis face turned to the side.

"Do you remember?" Ominis whispered in astonishment, placing the glass on the table. The bottom clinked against its surface, just like that evening, and he felt reality around him waver, blending with time and space. He stopped understanding where they were, who they had become, and how the world had changed for them. Swallowing a lump in his throat, he listened to his heartbeat and to Sebastian's breathing.

"Not exactly. More like I have a hunch. After all, I'm still the same person, and I think roughly the same way as before," he said as he sat up, moving closer to Ominis until their thighs touched, and his breath brushed against Ominis' bashful face. His gaze traced over Ominis' wide, astonishment-filled azure eyes, the perfectly sculpted nose, and the slightly parted, enticingly glistening lips. Sebastian himself wasn't surprised at all that he once wanted to kiss those lips because they attracted him then, and they did now.

"Can you remind me how it was?" he asked softly.

"Of course," Ominis whispered softly, feeling like he was losing his mind from the newfound closeness with Sebastian. Right now, he fully understood how strong his longing for this had been.

He slowly approached his face, his fingers caressing those beloved features. Each touch sent a throbbing wave of warmth through his body, rising from the depths where he had tried to hide all his feelings for all these years. Was this really happening? They were so close to each other again, they were together again, perhaps now forever. Ominis eagerly pressed his lips to Sebastian's, completely forgetting that he had planned to recreate their first innocent short kiss exactly. He pressed his body against Sebastian, wrapping one arm around his waist, while the other hand found its way into Sebastian's hair, pulling him closer, unwilling to ever let go. He nearly stopped breathing, sinking deeper and deeper into the kiss, keenly feeling every move Sebastian made in response. Sallow didn't attempt to take the lead, allowing Ominis' lips to explore his, letting their tongues entwine. His hands slowly moved upward along Ominis' thighs, reminiscing about every centimeter of his body. They briefly gripped his waist for a few moments, gently traced his back to his shoulders, and tenderly touched his neck. He didn't remember their first kiss; he didn't recall if their relationship had evolved further and, if so, how. But he remembered these sensations: the slightly trembling body in his arms, responsive and tender, transforming into a cold, marble statue in front of everyone else; the barely audible sweet moans that broke through when his hands touched the most sensitive spots; the intoxicatingly sweet scent, more pleasant than anything he had ever encountered. How could he forget such a beautiful part of his life? Had what happened later turned even these perfect memories into something painful? He pushed away these thoughts and briefly pulled back from Ominis, not wanting to let them both suffocate. Looking once again at that perfect face, now with reddened lips and quivering half-closed eyelids, he took a couple of deep breaths and kissed him again, this time more insistently, pressing Ominis against the armrest of the couch and gently tilting his head back. After a few deep movements, Sebastian's lips moved to Ominis' neck, and he moaned so loudly, arching into the kiss, that they both slightly startled from the unexpectedness of it. Sebastian paused, exhaling heavily into Ominis' shoulder.

"Was our first kiss really this intense?" Sebastian smirked, catching his breath. Raising his head, he ran his fingers along Ominis' flushed cheek, observing as he gradually regained his composure.

"Then it felt just like that," Ominis smiled, pressing himself against Sebastian and resting his head on his shoulder. Uninvited tears began to fill his eyes, and his fingers clenched the fabric of his friend's shirt. His body was torn apart by overwhelming emotions, and he clung to Sebastian, fearing to let go for even a second. A mixture of unconditional happiness and regret boiled inside him, and he couldn't believe that it was all happening for real, not in one of his dreams. He felt Sebastian's fingers touching his back and shivered slightly. His body had missed this warmth so much; it eagerly absorbed the almost-forgotten sensations and came to life, sending nervous impulses to Ominis' brain, like tiny bright fireworks exploding in the pitch darkness. How could Sebastian forget everything when he was touching him just like he did seven years ago?

"I loved you, Ominis?" Sebastian whispered, trailing his fingers along his friend's spine. He enjoyed feeling the warmth of his body and listening to his trembling breath. He was sure he could easily fall in love with this graceful young man, as long as he kissed him again.

"Yes. I think so. I believe you were sincere when you told me that," he murmured into his shoulder, breathing in and out slowly.

"And did you love me?" Sebastian whispered even softer.

"More than anything in the world," Ominis' voice broke and trembled as he realized how honest his answer was. He bit his lower lip until it hurt, trying to hold back the muffled sobs.

"So what happened?" the question came, and Sebastian gently pulled away, taking Ominis by the shoulders and looking into his face attentively. A red flower of pain began to bloom in his chest when he saw how distorted his friend's face had become upon hearing that question. Ominis had been postponing this moment as long as he could, but he knew that sooner or later, he would have to tell Sebastian about it. Sallow gently wiped away a tear that had fallen from Ominis' lashes. Ominis opened his mouth to begin speaking, but just then, they both started at the insistent knocking on the door.

"Ominis, damn it, come here!" they heard Marvolo's languid voice from the corridor. Ominis immediately realized that he had once again overindulged in alcohol, but, surprising even himself, he willingly got up and headed to the door. Apparently, he had tried to choose the lesser of two inconveniences, and in this case, it seemed to be dealing with his brother. After all, for now, it only caused discomfort to him alone, unlike the impending conversation about the past. He encouragingly smiled at Sebastian, quickly wiped his eyes with his palms, and opened the door slightly.

"What do you want? Have you seen the time?" Ominis hissed, firmly holding the door handle, ready to shut it at any moment.

"You lovebirds never sleep at this time. The light in one of your bedrooms stays on almost until morning. I can only guess what you're up to," Marv cast an icy glance at Sebastian, whom he could see through the partially open door, "don't you want to take a walk?"

"No, thanks," Ominis tried to close the door, but Marvolo stuck his foot in the gap, preventing it from slamming shut.

"You want to take a walk, Ominis. You definitely do," Ominis heard the rustling of parchment in his older brother's hands, "I have a very interesting letter for you."

Ominis nervously swallowed, suspecting the possible authorship of this letter. After briefly telling Sebastian that he would be back soon, he hurriedly left the room and magically locked the door. In complete silence, he and Marvolo moved along the corridor, brightly illuminated by the moonlight, and after a few minutes, they reached the backyard, densely overgrown with long-neglected boxwood bushes, now resembling more of a forest than a cultivated area. The night was cold, but the air already carried the scent of spring. Ominis took a deep breath, thinking that it wouldn't be a bad place to live here if it weren't for Marvolo in the house. He felt his brother lean toward his face, as if studying something, and after a moment, he grasped Ominis' chin, turning his face to the side and tilting it slightly. Ominis froze for a few seconds but then reached out to push Marvolo away. However, Marvolo had already released his chin and chuckled in satisfaction.

"Looks like I was right about you," Marvolo's voice was ominously cheerful, "just don't try to convince me that the bruise on your neck is just a normal one, little Ominis. A sodomite Auror, what a wonderful combination, isn't it?"

"What are you talking about?" Ominis shuddered with fear, a cold sweat breaking out on his back, and the ground seemed to disappear from under his feet. Of course, Marvolo couldn't have missed the letter sent to him. But why would Damien be so foolish as to mention his work at the Ministry? He knows perfectly well the Gaunts' stance on the government.

"Savage, of course, isn't quite dumb enough to directly call you an Auror, but it seems he forgot that we've met," a wild, satisfied grin spread across Marvolo's face as he spoke, "he was still a student when he attended the interrogations about your first murder. Remember that pitiful Muggle? I have an excellent memory for names and faces, but Savage seems to have remembered us as nothing more than a faceless gang of delinquent teenagers with influential parents."

"Give me the letter," Ominis gritted out, feeling like he was about to tremble with fear and anger. If Marvolo were to tell their father about this, he and Sebastian would have to find a new refuge. Or maybe they would have to do that anyway, now that Damian's owl had found him here? Hundreds of worries swirled in his mind once again.

"There's nothing important in it, don't worry. Your precious partner just cares a lot about you and wants to help. But you know what, Ominis? I wouldn't trust him, and I certainly wouldn't write any replies. Who knows, this letter might accidentally end up on our father's desk. Do you understand, yes?" Marvolo slowly circled around Ominis, clearly relishing the situation. Finally he had that fish on his hook. The sadistic smirk played on his face.

"Yes," Ominis barely whispered in response, feeling a knot of fear churning in his stomach. His father would undoubtedly turn them over to the Ministry if he found out he had been an Auror. Maybe it was time to escape from here before it was too late?

"Perhaps you think you can escape and live happily somewhere else, huh?" Marvolo's voice now sounded right behind Ominis, almost in his ear. His alcohol-laden breath brushed against his face. It was as if he could read his thoughts. Ominis felt paralyzed and couldn't move. It all felt horribly reminiscent of his childhood, and he was ready to burst into tears and scream, but his vocal cords couldn't produce a sound. Marvolo's hand grabbed him by the throat, and the tip of his wand pressed into the soft skin beneath his chin, "you're mistaken if you really think that. You'll either end up here again, but alone and under far less pleasant circumstances, or in Azkaban."

"What do you want, Marv?" Ominis asked quietly, barely finding the strength to push those words out. He couldn't feel his limbs, and he felt like he would collapse to the ground as soon as his brother released him. Fear choked him, causing cold sweat to bead on his forehead, and he desperately gasped for air through his mouth.

"What do I want... I want a proper younger brother. Not one as defective as you. In gratitude for our taking you back, you could at least try to be a worthy Gaunt, but no, you insult us with complete disregard for family traditions," Marvolo injected feigned sadness into his voice, "starting tomorrow, both of you will grace Father with your presence at dinner, listen to him, and politely respond. After dinner, you, personally, will delight me with your efforts to become a good brother. You can even bring your friend along. Agreed?"

"Y-yes," Ominis squeezed out with a trembling voice, drowning in another wave of horror. His teeth chattered as if from a chill. He had a suspicion about what Marvolo wanted to do with him after dinner, and he wasn't pleased at all. Ominis knew his brother was completely unhinged, and if until tonight he had hoped to barricade himself from Marvolo behind closed doors and avoidance, that hope had burst like a soap bubble. His mind couldn't solve this problem right now, but he would definitely come up with a solution later.

Marvolo released his grip, and Ominis slumped to the ground, shaking violently. Why had he thought that returning to the family estate was a good idea? What had he expected? That his brother had grown up and become less cruel? His cruelty had just become less straightforward and more sophisticated and sadistic. He heard Marv's retreating footsteps, but he couldn't force himself to get up and go back to the bedroom. In a matter of seconds, he had gone from a happy, safe world with Sebastian to a hellish abyss with demons dancing in it with the face of his brother.

They couldn't stay here anymore, but they couldn't run away right now either. They needed a plan. Maybe they even needed help. Ominis covered his face with his hands, trying to catch his breath and contain the rising panic. For a while, he would have to play by Marvolo's rules to keep Sebastian safe, participate in his sadistic games to avoid ending up in a worse place. He knew that Their faces were now prominently featured on posters all over magical and Muggle Britain because Marvolo graciously brought one such poster every time he ventured out of the estate. He found it amusing and a constant reminder of the guests' status and position in this house.

Ominis' breathing gradually calmed down. After all, Sebastian was nearby, and as long as that was the case, he could endure any trial. He slowly got to his shaky feet and tried to shake the mud off his pants. What he didn't notice was that Sebastian's silhouette had been visible in the window all this time, and he had been watching him with a worried expression. It seemed that Ominis was about to have another unpleasant conversation about the past.