Chapter 15

Astrid didn't return until dawn, exhaustion having claimed her battle-weary body. She rushed to the solar, Arthur joining her along the way.

"Sleep imprisoned us both, sister," Arthur said with a sense of guilt. 

"At least we are well rested and can relieve our mother and my wife," Astrid said and then stopped as she realized what she had just said to her brother. 

"She is your wife, sister. You have every right to call her that," Arthur said reassuringly, grasping her shoulder just before entering the solar. 

They both froze as they watched their mother and Vevina frantically working over their brother, blood everywhere and Lancer moaning.

"He ripped the stitches after fighting us while in the throes of a dream," Elaine explained. 

"Damn it, brother," Arthur mumbled. "I should have remembered that Lancer always relives the battle in his dreams from that day."

"Since when?" Astrid asked. 

"Since you and Rohan had gone missing."

"That matters little at the moment," their mother insisted. "It is what must be done now that matters, and we could use your help in restraining him."

Astrid and Arthur positioned themselves at the shoulders and feet of their brother as Vevina once again stitched the wound. 

When she was finally done, she would have toppled over if not for the quick reaction of her wife. Astrid caught her arm and secured her in the crook of her shoulder. 

"Vevina is exhausted," Elaine said. "She had not slept a wink, insisting that I take time to rest while she continued to care for Lancer alone. If it wasn't for her, calming voice and actions..." Elaine shook her head. 

"...Lancer would have continued to fight us and ripped out even more stitches."

"You will rest now," Astrid demanded, tilting her wife's chin up and seeing how exhaustion consumed her lovely violet eyes.

"I would like that," she said with yawn. 

Astrid was about to swing her wife up into her arms when Lancer suddenly attempted to bolt off the bed. He would have been successful if not for Arthur's firm hold on his shoulders. Astrid helped him keep Lancer stable, but the injured brother didn't settle completely until Vevina rested her hand to his chest and spoke softly in his ear. 

When Lancer finally woke from his disturbed sleep, Astrid was able to order her wife to go rest. She wished she could join her, be alone with her and express her gratitude for what she'd done for her brother, but she was still needed at Lancer's side. 

She watched Vevina, saw that fatigue had claimed her body, and she worried that she wouldn't have the strength to climb the stairs to their bedchamber. 

"Tell me of the battle, Astrid," Lancer said, his teeth gritted against the pain. 

"Yes," Vevina encouraged. "Tell your brother of the victory."

"It was a worthy win."

Soon they were comparing their prowess with a sword. 

Astrid slipped out of the solar a couple of hours later to check on her wife. She found her sound asleep in their bed, snuggled deep amidst the bedding, with a strong fire keeping a chill from the room, and she wished she was keeping her warm with her body.

The thought didn't startle her as she walked over to the fireplace and braced her hand against the mantel to stare down at the flames. Vevina had been on her mind much too often and in ways that would probably shock and offend her innocence. 

She had been pleased to realize she wasn't a complete little mouse, afraid of everything, but then again, that sudden knowledge made Astrid all the more curious to learn how she would react to making love, and with a woman no less.

Vevina had a gentle touch and a sincere kindness to her, and right now Astrid wasn't prepared to deal with a tender woman. She needed one with strength and hunger for her sexual side, for Astrid's need for a woman bordered more on ferocious rather than tender. 

Astrid rubbed at the back of her neck, a steady pain pinching at the base. She growled low in her throat. She thought of Lancer and his disturbing dreams after battle, another fault she took to her heart and considered her own. If she had been victorious against the babarians, then Rohan would still be with them and Lancer would not suffer as he did. 

She was not the leader she should have been that day, and that was why she kept the anger alive inside her. Never would Astrid allow one of hers to be taken from her, never would she not protect her people and her land, and the anger remained to make sure of it. 

Astrid walked over to the bed and bent down on her haunches to gently run her fingers along her wife's cheek. "I will keep you safe, even from me."

~*~

A few days later, after a brief bout with fever, Lancer incessantly complained about being confined to his bed until Elaine could no longer bear to listen and freed him, though not before issuing strict warnings as to what he could and could not do.

Vevina kept her laughter to herself as she listened to Elaine's commands, knowing full well that Lancer would adhere to none of them. But satisfied that his leg seemed to be healing nicely, she didn't worry over it.

"And do you have anything to add?" Lancer asked, drawing Vevina out of her musing.

She smiled. "Keep the bandage clean and the stitches dry and you should fair well."

"I like her list better than yours, Mother," Lancer said with a laugh.

"Then make certain you adhere to it," Elaine cautioned and shook her finger at her son. "Or else."

Lancer laughed again. "Or else what?"

"Or I'll have Veviva stitch you up again," Astrid said without an ounce of laughter or a pinch of a smile. 

Lancer's laughter turned to a grin. "A challenge you are certain to lose."

"I doubt it, but you are welcome to try," Astrid walked over to Vevina and held out her hand. "Come, wife, I have need of you."

After a brief hesitation, Vevina placed her hand in hers. She wanted to ask Astrid what need she spoke of, but another part of her didn't want to hear the answer. She thought to inform her that she had duties to tend to, but duty to her wife usurped all other duties. In truth, she knew she had no choice but to tend to her need, whenever it might be.

Her warm fingers closed strongly around her cool ones as if she didn't intend to let her go. 

Vevina was surprised when they stopped in the great hall and she retrieved her green wool cloak that sat on the end of one of the tables and handed it to her without explanation. Vevina slipped it on, assuming she intended for them to go outdoors, but instead she directed her to the staircase and they climbed the stairs to the battlements.

Astrid preceded her along the walkway and stopped to glance out over the land that stretched far out before them, Vevina halting beside her to enjoy the view. 

"I had hoped to take you for a walk across the moors today, in appreciation for all you have done for my little brother," Astrid said, and pointed to a cloud infested sky. "But the impending weather prohibits such an excursion."

"That is very thoughtful, thank you," Vevina said. 

Astrid turned to look at her, and she was caught by the gentleness in Astrid's beautiful features. Gone was the harshness in her golden eyes and the squint of doubt lines that always fanned them. Her mouth was visibly relaxed as if she could actually smile if she tried, and her strong narrow chin, while still strong, didn't jut out as if prepared to suffer a blow. This tender soul, she could get to know, Vevina thought. 

Unfortunately, she disappeared in a flash, and Vevina wondering if perhaps it was a wishful thinking, that had her believing she saw kindness in the warrior woman. 

"You served me well, wife," Astrid said. 

"It is my duty," she said, and looked out across the barren moors that surrounded the keep. 

"Vast emptiness," Astrid said, her own glance followed hers. 

"Vast peacefulness," Vevina corrected. "There is nothing there to obscure its beauty or hide from you. It leaves itself open, vulnerable, and invites you to do the same."

"It is not good to be vulnerable here," Astrid snapped. 

"We are all vulnerable one way or another."

"Only if we allow it," Astrid said. "You have a choice to be strong or weak."

"Strength comes from different sources," Vevina argued gently, for she felt as if she defended herself. She knew Astrid thought her meek, unable and perhaps unwilling to defend herself, but she had managed to protect herself since she was young with the only weapon she had, her wits. And while it wasn't as lethal as a sword, it had allowed her to survive. 

Astrid turned to look at her as if seeing her for the first time. And then she slowly nodded. 

"You're right about that."