Chapter 18

Vevina had never considered anything much about Arthur. In fact, ever since their almost marriage was cut short, she had only focused on other things. But now it felt like Arthur wanted to step back into her mind and claim some sort of dominance. She felt a twinge of guilt for their brief exchange. 

She wouldn't want anyone to find out about this. Her solitude was only a way of protecting herself against her stepfather, if he didn't see her, he couldn't hurt her. She supposed she thought the same of her situation with Astrid. If she kept out of her sight, she need not concern herself with their marriage. 

However, she was no longer a child who could run and hide. She was a grown woman and was capable of making her own decision in life. And what of gossip? It was sure to start if Astrid and she remained distant from one another. What then?

Now she understood why Arthur reappeared. She did have a choice to make for herself and her future. Would she rather be with him or Astrid who barely acknowledge her presence? Arthur was all around perfect. He was a man and of high status and most of all, he favored her despite all else. He could give her many things that a woman would want, a family, and children. What could Astrid give her aside from confusion, mistreatment and harsh words?

But still, she shivered at the thought of Astrid's kiss. Every time she was alone, her mind would wander to the beautiful warrior woman. She had so many feelings that she couldn't describe about the woman she called her wife. She needed Astrid to be a wife to her, and the only way she could achieve that was by being a wife to Astrid first.

No matter how daunting the task seemed or how much she preferred to seek the comfort of solitude, she had to make certain that she have given a fair chance to their marriage and the only way to be certain of that was to make sure it was secure.

Vevina placed her sewing in the basket beside her chair, stood, smoothed the wrinkles from her green wool skirt, adjusted the ties on her blouse, ran her fingers through her long dark hair, and then went in search of Astrid Sinclare.

~*~

Astrid pounded the table with her fist. The sturdy wood didn't creak or budge, nor did her father, who sat opposite her. She had always admired her father's ability to remain calm and unwavering in confrontation, though today was different. Today she wanted her father to capitulate and allow her free reign in the search for Rohan. 

It was only she and her father in the solar. She didn't need her brothers' inference or their opinions. None of them understood, none of them knew or could imagine the horrors Rohan was probably suffering, and if her brother had succumbed to his injuries and torture, then she wanted his body brought home for a proper burial.

"With enough men and my leadership, I can attack Mordrac and seize his land..."

Her father interrupted with a firm. "No."

"Afraid," Astrid said and instantly regretted it. Her father was an honorable man who taught his children that fear was not to be feared, but to be embraced and used as a weapon against the enemy.

Her father reflected the barb with a knowing nod and a reasonable explanation. "An attack on Mordrac would take sizable troops and time and leave our land and people vulnerable. It is not a wise choice, though a difficult one since I too want Rohan home."

"It can be done..."

"But not without significant consequences that I am not willing to take," her father said. 

Astrid wanted to strike out at someone or anything, her hurt was so great. How could she have returned safely home without Rohan? 

"Astrid," her father said calmly, and motioned for her daughter to sit.

With a slump of defeat, Astrid sank into one of the two chairs in front of the table. She knew her father was right, but it didn't make it any easier her.

"Your brothers and I have never stopped searching for Rohan and we never will, but as clan leader I must do what is best for the clan, not only for my immediate family. You must understand this, for one day you will lead the clan and need to make decisions you don't always favor. Besides, we discovered there is a chance that Mordrac may have sold Rohan..."

"When...how...where was he taken?"

Her father held up a hand. "We only discovered the news this morning."

Astrid shook her head. "And if I had given you a chance to speak when I burst into your solar, you would have told me."

Her father leaned forward, bracing his arms on the table. "I can understand your need to find your brother. But then you also know how important it is for us to be wise in our response. There is more at stake here than just Rohan's life."

Astrid didn't want to listen to what her father told her, but understood it completely. Their enemy could very well be using Rohan as a weapon against them, expecting the Sinclares to charge recklessly into battle, especially now with her own return home. If plans weren't carefully followed, endless lives could be lost, not to mention land holdings. 

"Arthur has men out now verifying the news and seeing if we can discover where Rohan was taken," her father said. "His men are good. Give them time and they will have an answer soon enough."

"This is hard to sit and do nothing," Astrid admitted.

"Take time to heal and be with Vevina. When the time comes and it will, to rescue Rohan, you will ride with your brothers and free him. Now go and see your mother, and look happy before she drives me crazy with worry over you."

Astrid laughed. "You are the leader. Order her to stop..."

Her father laughed even louder. "Order your mother?"

Astrid winced. "I should know better. I will go speak with her and ease her mind."

"And what of your wife?"

Astrid's smile vanished and her body grew visibly rigid.

"Astrid!" her father snapped. 

She reluctantly met her father's eyes.

"You haven't sealed your marriage vows."

Astrid remained silent and continued to hold her father's questioning stare.

Her father sighed and stood. "You are the next Chieftain of the Clan Sinclare. You have a responsibility, and that includes being a wife to Vevina by laws. I know you did not choose her and for that I am sorry, but she is here and she is yours. I expect you to treat her well and not ignore her. "

~*~

Vevina watched her wife stomp through the great hall swearing, people moving out of her way, the women quickly huddle in gossip. She'd been so busy keeping to herself that she had not paid attention to the wagging tongues and the damage they were to cause.

She adjusted her blue shawl on her shoulder and made her way to the kitchen, alert now to the whispers around her while appearing lost in her thoughts. Her wife had left the hall, leaving the door open behind her, men rushing to close it against the cold wind or perhaps against Astrid. 

From the grumbling she overheard, it appeared the clan was concerned with Astrid's strange behavior since her return. She even heard one woman refer to her as barbarian, and another made mention of Astrid constantly argued with her father. She knew that since everyone in the clan respected their chief, a daughter who disagreed or failed to show him respect would always be the subject of much gossip.

Vevina berated herself as she exited the kitchen, the servants glaring at her and whispering as she went past. They lay the blame on her, as Astrid's wife. She had a duty to her wife, and it was obvious that she had been neglecting her. 

She could only imagine what her stepfather must be thinking. She had to make things right or no doubt her father would show her the error of her ways. 

She returned to the kitchen and spoke with the cook, giving her directions for the evening meal she wanted to be served to her and Astrid in their bedchamber. 

The cook's sour expression didn't change, though she nodded forcefully, as if letting her know it was about time she tended to her duties.

Vevina rushed through the great hall and up the stairs to her bedchamber. She wanted to gather the last of the heather on the moor and needed her cloak, since the day had turned blustery. As she ran back down the stairs, she recalled Arthur's words about her being a warrior and smiled. Perhaps she did have a little bit of a warrior in her. 

"Vevinva."

She jumped and turned to see Astrid making her way to her. 

"I wish to speak with you," she said. "Privately."