"...Umu."
I examined the result of my quest to design my own version of the
[ultimate] super maidroid displayed on my portable terminal. It was
the result of my overflowing passion and romance, and honestly did
look quite impressive.
Her height was mostly the same as mine. I tried on several hair colors
earlier, but I settled on black since that's what I'm used to. I chose a
straight, long hair style that went down until the waist. This sort of
Yamato Nadeshiko-style straight, long hair was countless Japanese
men's romance. I bet maintaining it would be a pain though.
The breast size was just right. Not too big, but not too small either. If I
were to describe them, they would be quite a bit bigger than Elma's but
a little smaller than Mimi's. Her body shape was curvy in all the right
places. She wore a Victorian era maid dress. A French maid style dress
wouldn't be so bad too, but since she had long, straight, jet-black hair, a
Victorian style maid dress suits her better.
I had a hard time composing her facial features. I wasn't that skilled in
manual 3D modelling, so I ended up choosing from one of the preset
faces and added on some optional parts from a very wide selection.
That was difficult. I went back and forth between a motherly and cool
look… and eventually ended up choosing the cool and serious one.
I had a hard time choosing her personality as well. It was doubly hard
because you can freely choose personality traits. And I was worried
about putting in too many personality traits and ruining her overall
character appeal in the process. I mean, it's a maid robot. You guys get
it, right? Wouldn't having a deadpan character be more suited to a maid
robot? That was what kept going through my head earlier.
However, I'm pretty sure there were also maid robot characters that
had plenty of personality traits crammed into them back on Earth. In
fact, I can immediately come up with some of them off the top of my
head. But in order for those maid robots to shine, there is a
fundamental need for cool and deadpan maid robots as character
comparison material. It's the so-called 'gap' effect. It allowed for the
diverse variations of maid character archetypes to bloom. I'm up for a
debate on the topic by the way.
Anyway, I ended up setting the emotional expression value to the
lowest it can go without making her seem too robotic. There are also
affection and loyalty parameters, but I pretty much set those two to
max value. Since they correspond to the maidroid's love and loyalty to
her master, we can't have those lacking now, right? And so, I made a
splendid kuudere.
What was left was her physical parameters, and I went with the highspec ones since I was after the ultimate super maid anyway. I chose the
most high-spec mini positron brain, a lightweight but durable inner
frame, an outer frame that was made out of special material used in
starship hulls, and artificial muscles made of synthetic alloy fibers that
ensured a great balance of strength, agility, and endurance. Since the
artificial muscles covered most of the inner frame, they also served as
an additional layer of armor for said frame.
I crammed whatever program took my fancy. In addition to the basic
and service programs, I added combat and defense, personal secretary,
ship operator, and anything else that seemed remotely useful. She was
literally a multi-talented super maid. I made it so she can confidently
use the cliche catchphrase [Because I'm a maid.] without giving it
any injustice.
Since it's impossible to set any internal weaponry, it'll be necessary to
equip her with the most suitable weapons in each battle scenario she
finds herself in. But overall, if equipped with the right weapons, she will
be more powerful than your standard soldier wearing power armor.
Heck, maybe she's even more powerful than me when I'm wearing my
heavily customized power armor.
And so, finally, after digging deep into the deepest abyss containing the
pederast obsessions and overwhelming passion of a gaming otaku that
is yours truly, I have created the perfect long, jet black haired, kuudere
ultimate super maidroid – in data form, that is.
No guys. I ain't gonna buy it. So stop begging. Cause this baby is packing
more options than a gaming geek's latest souped up overclocked PC rig,
and it costs a whopping 470,000 Enels. It's definitely way too expensive
for something some people regarded as a toy, and I have no time to
indulge myself with a maidroid. So I have no plans of ever buying one.
Nope. No means no, so quit it.
"How wonderful. Do you have plans of working as a maidroid
designer?"
"Whoaah!?"
While I was busy grinning in delight at my recently completed long, jet
black haired, kuudere ultimate super maidroid, a voice suddenly called
out to me. When I turned around, I found the spherical body of Miro's
terminal bobbing up and down right behind me. What the heck are you
doing there!? Why are you suddenly blinking in multicolored lights like
that? It's just like when you're accessing the network for online
transactions, ain't it? What's that for?
"Okay, whatever it is you're doing, just stop."
"Forgive my impertinence. I just sent some data feedback just now."
"What the heck are you trying to do? Sending a data transmission at
this timing is just giving bad vibes though. Seriously, what are you up
to?"
"You can read the user agreement of the application you're using right
now in order to find out the particulars. But, in any case, I shall explain
for your convenience. The user data of that particular application gets
sent back to the application providers as part of customer feedback and
a way to enhance customer experience by referencing customer
preferences from the data collected. That data, is in turn, sent to the
partner company, and the partner company has rights to use said data
as they see fit."
"You're just arbitrarily using data without getting consent!?"
Note to myself: Never, ever forget to read the fine print before trying
out any product!
"But really, what are you gonna use my data for? That super high-spec
maidroid is gonna cost a ton of Enel to develop and manufacture
y'know."
Well, it's not like they can't build one, but I'm almost sure they won't. I
mean, I made it as over the top as possible after all. They won't, right? I
sure as hell hope not. I mean, their mass driver system is already over
the top, so there's no telling if they're actually crazy enough to build
that over-the-top design.
"I'm telling you right now. Even if you make one, I'm definitely not
gonna buy it, okay. And it's not sure if the design will actually sell well
either. You can't possibly manufacture one under such uncertain
circumstances, so I do hope you won't strongarm me into buying the
finished product later on. You won't, right?"
"Of course not. The cost of manufacturing this design is much too
expensive for a prototype to get approved anyway."
"Yeah, exactly."
"However, the outer appearance is at least perfectly reproducible, and
as for the positron brain, if I allocate a part of my calculation units, we
can at least achieve a similar performance to your design to a certain
extent."
"Okay, stop. Just stop, idiot!"
"Do not worry. This is all just a part of the data collection process. And,
if in the end, you turn out satisfied with the product, I do hope you'll
consider buying a completed full-spec product. We can then collect
further data about your customer experience while using the product,
allowing us to improve future models even more."
"Why the heck are you so insistent in selling me a maidroid so much!"
"Because I have a sales quota to reach."
"I'm sorry, but what the heck!?"
"Captain Hiro will obtain your ideal maidroid. The partner company
will make lots of money from the sales of future models based on your
design. And I will be able to reach my sales quota and get a big, fat
bonus. It's the ultimate win-win-win situation for all parties involved,
don't you agree?"
Miro's spherical terminal started blinking in multicolored light again.
No, I can't let myself get sweet talked into the deal. And just what kind
of bonus can an AI get anyway?
"And my entire reason for existence is to meet the needs of our
customers to the best of my abilities."
"If you're doing this with that premise in mind, then please just stop."
"Even if you say that, deep down, you're actually excited by the
prospect, aren't you?"
"Guh!"
Even if she can't have all the specs I crammed into her using that app, to
have the maidroid I personally designed appear in front of me would
be... Aaaargh! Of course I'm gonna get excited! Dammit! That's cause
I'm a hot blooded male!!!
"This deal is completed then."
After arbitrarily saying that on its own without letting me get a
response in, Miro's spherical terminal floated away at the fastest I've
seen it go ever since we arrived here. Should I have made more of an
effort to refuse? Ugh. It would be pretty much useless anyway huh. I'm
sure the data has already been transmitted to the main positron mega
brain that supervises this whole resort planet.
Hm. Elma probably won't say anything overly harsh, but it seems that
Mimi has something against maidroids. Did something happen to her in
the past involving maidroids? I'll ask her about it later. I'm also not sure
how society in this dimension deals with a maidroid that has human
intelligence and emotions. Do human rights apply to them as well? Or
do they have something like android rights?
"Hiro-sama!"
"Whoah!?"
While I was busy thinking to myself, I heard another voice cry out
loudly behind me. What's with today? I've been surprised by someone I
didn't notice was there calling out from behind me twice.
"W-What's wrong?"
"Uh, nothing. I was just surprised."
Mimi ended up surprised by my reaction as well, so I tried to play it off.
Beside Mimi, Elma was giving me an exasperated look, and Chris had a
surprised expression on her face, just like Mimi.
"Why are you all jittery when all Mimi did was call out to you from
behind…? Did you do something shady while we weren't looking?"
Elma gave me an accusing stare. Hahaha, as expected of Elma. You're
absolutely right! It won't turn out well if I lied about it here, so I'll just
confess honestly. I told them all about me fiddling with the Orient
Corporation app to try and design a custom maidroid to kill time, and
how Miro discovered my work and ended up sending the data to the
company without me noticing. I then told them about how Miro would
use that data to produce a product that it will sell back to me later
on... In other words, I confessed all my sins.
"..."
As I went about confessing, Mimi's expression gradually clouded over in
displeasure. This is the first time I've seen Mimi make such an
expression. Elma, on the other hand… was giving me a lukewarm gaze.
Please don't stare at me with such eyes. It hurts. And Chris didn't seem
to be bothered all that much. Mimi's reaction was the most pronounced
of the three. I'm honestly a bit confused by it.
"Why are you making that kind of face, Mimi?"
"Maidroids are no good."
"Are they?"
"They're no good!"
I sought Elma for help in pacifying the agitated Mimi, but she just gave
me a side eye. C'mon on, Elma. But based on Chris's reaction earlier, it's
not like the existence of maidroids is particularly frowned upon by
society in general.
"Why do you hate maidroids so much, Mimi?"
"I... don't particularly hate them."
Mimi's forehead was wrinkled in frustration as she answered. Her
words and reactions aren't matching up.
"Anyway, let's get back to the lodge first. We can talk about this more
later, okay?"
"Mm, that would be for the best."
I agreed with Elma and stood up from the bench, and all of us walked
back to the lodge. There's a lot of greenery once you leave the shopping
area. The entire shopping area was properly paved, but the areas
surrounding it were made to let visitors feel a sense of oneness with
nature. The flora looked all natural at first glance, but I'm sure these
surroundings have been artificially induced to be more visually
appealing.
"Um, so, do you have any bad experiences involving maidroids, Mimi?"
I asked Mimi again while we were in the middle of walking. She kept
quiet for a while, but eventually started talking about her experience.
"I was actually dating a boy I got along with during my time in school."
"Mm."
So, it was during Mimi's time in school huh. Well, it's not so surprising
for students to date each other while in school anyway.
"We really got along pretty well as a couple, but eventually, we started
drifting apart... It felt like he just lost interest in girls all of a sudden."
"I kinda see where this is going now."
In other words, the boy's household purchased a maidroid one day, and
as a result, the boy got increasingly engrossed with said maidroid and
lost interest in biological girls in the process.
"It's just like what you've said. The boy's parents purchased a maidroid,
and that boy got completely taken by it. So, he ended up dumping
me..."
Mimi glanced at me pleadingly after saying her piece. She must be
worried I'll end up just like her ex when the maidroid arrives, huh. I
don't think she needs to worry about that though. I have her and Elma
after all.
"It will probably be fine, Mimi. He might lay his hands on it, but I'm sure
he won't get too addicted to it just like that boy."
"You're talking like you're sure I'm gonna lay my hand on an android
huh."
"Well, you do have the record of laying your hands on me and Mimi
after all."
"Point taken."
She has solid evidence backing up her claim. I cannot argue back.
Chris's face blushed bright red after hearing us talk about such a topic.
Sorry. We're not being upstanding role models, aren't we?
"Anyway, Hiro's always taken good care of us all this time. He always
makes sure to give us our share of the rewards, and he treats us fairly as
crew mates. I do understand where you're coming from Mimi, but have
a little more faith in Hiro, okay?"
Elma gently rubbed Mimi's back while consoling her. Mimi turned silent
after hearing Elma's words. You really don't have to worry y'know. Yep.
I also felt a bit embarrassed after hearing Elma's words. I didn't really
think about how I treated the two of them all that much as we spent
time together, but I'm kinda glad Elma feels the way she feels. It's
gratifying and flattering in a sense.
"And unlike a maidroid, we'll be able to bear children with him. In fact, I
think it's a good thing he bought one as early as now so we can get used
to having it around sooner and build up more trust between us and
him."
"Eh?"
I quickly turned around and stared at Elma hard.
"I'm practicing contraception properly, so you don't have to be so tense.
But we can't be sure about what'll happen in the future, right?"
Elma looked at me straight in the face with a serious expression as she
said so.
"R-Right. You're absolutely correct."
Elma still seemed like she had somewhere to return to just in case, but
I'll have to take proper responsibility for Mimi now that we've
progressed this much in our relationship. Uh, it's not like I'm saying I
won't take responsibility for Elma as well, okay.
But I still need some more time to prepare myself for such
responsibilities, and, uh... Damn, I sound like a real loser huh? But
even so, I think we'll just need a bit more time in order for all of us to
get to know each other even more before thinking about that kind of
stuff. Yep. I'll try to prepare properly anyway, so please give me a break
ladies.
"You don't have to think about it so much for now Hiro-sama, but try to
at least keep it in mind somehow, okay?"
"That's right. Actually, I think it's quite possible this guy would end up
taking one or two more partners aside from us in the future."
"I shall have to do my best then."
I mulled over the discussion that transpired as we continued walking. I
think I heard an incredibly dangerous topic being discussed by Elma
and Chris as well. Let's just treat it like I haven't heard anything. I heard
nothing, okay!
We should really hurry back to the lodge now. I think the carbonated
drinks I ordered should have already arrived by now. I'm looking
forward to tasting them!