NINETEEN

The sound of the dawn call to prayer woke me up. This time I can hear more adhan sounds from several mosques in the village.

Unlike when I was in the evacuation camp, I could only hear the adhan from the evacuation mosque.

I am very grateful to be able to get through the disaster. Life will be easy if we are always grateful.

I sat on the side of the bed and rubbed my eyes. My feet walked gingerly to the mirror. I look at my puffy eyes, I cried and prayed last night.

I miss my mom so much. Where else should I look for her. There is no news until now.

I always pray for mom's good. Hopefully wherever she is, she will always be under God's protection. As long as mom's body has not been found. I believe mom is still alive.

I exhaled my breath slowly. Trying to get rid of sadness and convince myself that everything will be good in time.

Today is the most important day of my life. For the first time I will apply for a job. Even though I don't have my diploma and other data because it was lost during the disaster, I'm sure the restaurant leader will understand it.

I immediately performed the morning prayer in my room. I had knocked on the door in my father's room, but there was only the sound of Bening crying. Maybe she wanted to breastfeed her mother.

After praying, I left the room. My hand opened the window in the living room. The morning air was very cool.

My father opened the door and greeted me.

"You're awake, Ri."

"Yes, sir. I finished my morning prayer at the mosque. I thought Riri was still sleeping, she knocked on your room to wake you up."

"You didn't get angry with Kartika, did you?" asked my father in a whisper but his eyes bulged.

I shook my head with my eyes narrowed. As if you knew what was in my head.

"She gets angry when I wake her up for morning prayers," he explained softly.

"Oh," I nodded in understanding.

"Riri..." the voice from the room sounded loud.

I immediately went to my father's wife's room.

Bening was crying with a voice screeching in my ears.

"You carry her! I'm going to take a shower." she exclaimed angrily. My wife Kartika came out of the room with her hair in a ponytail.

I could only gape at her behavior. I was confused about how to hold the clear one. This was the first time I had ever held a baby on a mattress. I lifted the baby as best I could. I carried him with him in my arms. Apparently he cried and rebelled. I tried to hold him with his head on my shoulder. My hands were on his back.

"Cup cup cup baby..."

I came out to find my father sweeping the house, he was still wearing his sarong and cap.

Seeing me holding the baby, he stopped cleaning.

"Sorry! Ri, I can't hold the baby. I'm afraid," he explained with a worried face.

"Yes, it's okay, sir. Riri is also still learning to hold Bening," I replied, trying to pull my lips together.

"You have to be patient when you live here," my father said gently. His hand was still holding the broom.

"Yes, sir. God willing, Riri will be patient." I said with confidence.

"I want to change my clothes first. After that, continue sweeping and get ready for work." he said then put the broom on the wall.

I immediately went outside so that Bening could breathe in the fresh morning air.

I caught a glimpse of Zahra's back from afar. She walked quickly out of the gate wearing a batik shirt and black pants with a black fiber headscarf. Then she was lost in the hallway.

This early, my friend had already started her activities. I really didn't expect it. It feels like only yesterday that Zahra and I were wearing school uniforms. Even our band was going to perform at the farewell ceremony, but alas, a thousand pities. The earthquake and stunami hit. Our band did not perform. There was no farewell program.

I miss Akbar the drummer and Iyan the guitarist. When will I get to hang out with them?

Bruk!

I heard a sound behind me. It seemed like something heavy had fallen. I, who was carrying Bening, immediately stroked her back. Bening was probably startled by the sudden sound.

My feet stepped quickly into the house. I saw Kartika in pain holding her thumb.

"Who the hell put the broom in the middle of the road! So you tripped, right? It really hurts again! ouch!"

I didn't answer her nagging. I winced as I saw her in pain.

"Come on, wake up and give me some medicine. Isn't it bleeding?"

"Damn it! It must be your father who put the broom carelessly," she scolded as she stood up with difficulty.

Father heard the commotion. He came out with a questioning face.

"If you put the broom down, don't do it carelessly! How the hell!" she exclaimed in a high tone, looking sharply at my father. Then he went into the room.

"Maybe the broom fell, when you sent it to the wall," said my father, talking to himself. Then he went back to sweeping.

I went to the small courtyard of the house. My feelings were hurt when the woman yelled at my father so harshly. My heart cried, unable to comprehend the behavior of my father's wife. My mother had never yelled at my father, even when he was angry or guilty.

I didn't want to let my father be like that. Why was he silent when she yelled at him? Why are you so innocent when she's fiery.

I would like to talk to you later. How can he survive with his current wife.

Bening's crying brought my daydream to a halt. Maybe she was uncomfortable that she hadn't changed her diaper or hungry for breast milk.

I immediately went to the room to meet the mother of the baby I was carrying.

I found the woman had finished wrapping her thumb with a bandage and there was the color of medicine on it. She had finished. Then without looking at me she immediately grabbed Bening roughly. Suddenly I was shocked and said.

"Heh! You be careful!"

"You know what. Come on out." she exclaimed with a stern face.

I left her room, my ears no longer hearing Bening crying. Thankfully, but worried about Bening's mental health.

"Ri, I'm going to buy breakfast in front. You just take a shower there." said father with a shining face. As if he wasn't angry with the situation.

"Oh yes sir." I replied then immediately stepped into the bathroom.

After finishing the shower and changing clothes, my father returned from buying rice packets.

"Come on, Ri, eat together!" he said excitedly. I nodded impatiently as I ate my food.

I sat on a chair with three rice packets on the table.

My father was busy getting a glass and a teapot filled with water. He put them on the table. Then he sat in his chair. We faced each other.

"Bismillahirrahmanirrahim!" he exclaimed and his hands quickly unwrapped the rice.

"Hem, it smells really good. Sambal goreng and capcay!" he said with sparkling eyes.

I followed suit by eating the packaged rice in front of me.

"Alhamdulillah, I'm happy to be able to eat together at the dining table with your favorite son," he said, making me melt.

"You can do it!"