10

I was sent into a spiral. My self worth was down the drain. What was I if I wasn't my mom's helper? I spent the next month crying at the slightest emotional disturbance. My boss gets upset about a meal I didn't prep correctly?

Instant tears, and ugly sobbing within five minutes. I knew that most of my pain was my mind attacking itself, but that didn't mean I could stop the pain. Sometimes the mental anguish was so bad that my emotions seemed to snap off. It would come on so fast, and suddenly that it would leave my mind muddled, and my ears ringing. When my emotions came crashing back into my head like a wave it brought on a wave of dark emotions, and thoughts. 

I finally made it to the front of the line around five in the afternoon. That thought sent a jolt of humor through me. I'd be an hour into work about now if I'd gone. This was only the second time I'd ever just skipped over work in my entire life. The first time was after my boss accused me of multiple things I didn't do simply to make me look bad. 

Fucker wasn't even paying me minimum wage at the time. I worked so hard for that asshole, and he just believed every single lie his son told him despite years of hard loyal work. Why was his son whispering lies into his ear you may ask? Well because I ignored his insane demands, and chose to go above his head to do things right the first time. He always added extra steps or even dangerous steps to tasks because he thought that was the smart way to do it. 

Even if what he was suggesting was actually dangerous enough to risk bodily harm if I were to obey his orders. His father hadn't listened to me at all. He took his son's word as law, and threw accusations in my face when I tried to tell him the truth so I handed him my apron, and walked out. If he wasn't going to stand up for me after I'd been working there for half a decade then I wasn't going to let him act as if I was worthless or weaker because I was a woman doing a man's job. His words. 

It was my turn. I filled out my information pretty quickly. There was a second page that wanted to know about my awakening, and me being the poor liar I was I almost wrote down everything about my awakening. My five star class awakening had to have some value. Maybe not now, but the ability to manually train my stats, and having a clear cut way to do it would make it so I could actually gain more stats per level in the long term. 

I wasn't the smartest person around so someone else had to have noticed the same thing I did by now. I wrote down warrior. I put in my fearless skill, and it's description. Then I put down my stats. I could pull off looking like a warrior, and I vaguely remembered it being one of the classes I was offered. 

My strength stat was higher then average so it made sense. They would just think I got the short stick on the skill reward when I awakened. Being unlucky wasn't something that was exclusive to me so I probably wasn't the only one who had a problem skill set at the moment. Fearless may be a passive skill, but it wasn't necessarily a bad passive skill. Oh how naïve I'd been. 

I wouldn't find out until later how rare resistance skills actually were, and that one that granted completely immunity to anything was the same as winning the lottery. I was escorted into a room at the back, and there was an officer back there. I didn't know what rank he was, but he was definitely military, and dressed to impress. He looked like the definition of straight cut, and polished while I was overweight, and had messy hair. My clothes didn't help the matter because it was obvious that they were cheap. 

It was then that I remembered that I hadn't changed my clothes from the day before. I rolled out of bed, and got a move on because I was on a mission. My clothes automatically started feeling more grimy then they had a moment before as he gestured for me to sit. I could see him judging me as he looked me over from head to toe. How could a girl who didn't even take the time to brush her hair benefit them? 

I could see the question written all over his face. I was nervous, but I sat down, and offered him my hand anyway.

"I'm Lilian Barnet," I smiled gently. 

A habit I'd developed so people would ignore my severe expression. It gave the impression that I was friendly, and often made people think I was younger. I liked it when people used to underestimate me. It didn't happen so much anymore now that I looked to be in my early twenties even though I was actually closer to thirty, but I still remembered the feeling. If I was underestimated then my chances of making a favorable impression were higher. 

He just stared at my hand until I took it back. 

"You think that because you awakened some powerful abilities you'll become some hero?" he stated bluntly. 

"No," I sighed heavily, "I just know that my survival chance is lower then I want it to be, and if leveling up, and getting stronger ups my chances then I need to get on it."

He stared at me even longer. Appraising me slowly. I was pretty sure he'd already made his judgement. He was just debating on sending me away because he thought I was fat, spoiled, and lazy, but I hadn't given a wrong answer. He rubbed his forehead in exasperation.