CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE. Can't Go Wrong.

Placing his hands together, Jaden let the energy inside him flow. 

He felt it coursing through his veins, gathering between his hands. 

He felt his hands grow white hot as the energy began changing into something else. But strangely, the heat didn't hurt him. 

It didn't burn, rather it only felt like he was holding air.

Then, as sudden as a flash of lightning plunging into the earth, there was a small spark and then fire, dancing frantically, moving with the winds, just as vibrant and as real as everything he could see.

Jaden moved the flames from one hand to the other, waiting for it to grow larger.

Satisfied with it's size, he pulled his hands back.

His eyes fell on an old, shriveled tree not too far away from him. It leaned heavily on its side, bathed silver underneath the nightsun's glow, seemingly out of place in this world of grass and shrubs.

This had been his target for the past few years, but not once had he been able to make an attack strong enough to damage it. 

Maybe today would be different.

A faint sheen of sweat gathered over his forehead as he struggled to keep his fire going, continuously feeding it with energy.

Jaden swung his hands forward simultaneously, the flames following his movements, building it's momentum.

Alas, just before he could let the attack go, he heard a loud ring in his head, followed by a flood of gripping, chaotic memories.

Memories he thought he had left behind but always came back to plague him.

Of him using this same talent against a defenseless boy, and watching with utter satisfaction as the flames reduced him to nothing but ashes.

The fire he'd been building died out right after that and so did his visions. 

The tree remained standing when he opened his eyes.

Letting out a sigh, he straightened and ran his fingers through his hair, frustrated.

Ever since that accident he'd been unable to use fire.

His guilt settled at the pit of his belly like a rock.

He stared at his hands, remembering what had happened that day.

"If I'd just..... walked away."

Jaden couldn't remember the full details. He only remembered the events that had led to that moment. Remembered losing himself to his anger, the world growing black.

When his consciousness came back, Ren was dead, the forest was on fire and there was nothing he could do to turn back the times. To somehow prevent what had happened.

He'd known he was the one responsible for Ren's death. 

And sometimes, when he wasn't being a yellow-bellied cub, he almost wished he had died that day instead.

If for nothing more than to pay for what he had done.

He glared at his mark, the curse that had stayed with him since birth.

Why couldn't he have been born a different person? 

Why give him this power if all he was destined to do with it was hurt those he had no intention of hurting?

Jaden swallowed his growing rage and turned to gaze at the hills beyond his father's hunting territory. 

The first stars had already begun to glitter, and all around him was a world of silver and black.

The wind carried to him the scent of rain, and his beast stirred just underneath his skin, longing to go for a run.

He'd come here hoping he could wash away his past, yet it was all coming back to him unbidden.

Why couldn't someone else have been born with this curse? Why did it have to be him?

Cherry was right.

He was the reason why his family had gone through all this suffering and here he was wishing they didn't have to leave the outskirts.

He'd heard of the Capital from the stories his parents had told him.

Their lives had been so much better until he came along.

Now he was scared of what it would all be like if they went back.

The people would resent him, that was for sure, and his presence would affect his family in every way.

At the same time, there was the darker side of him, the one who '" to leave. To see what the world out there held in store for him.

And a quiet longing for something, he wasn't sure what, that existed beyond the borders of the outskirts.

"Thought I'd find you here," his father's deep voice came to him then. And Jaden heard the sound of his boots as he ambled through the short grass to stand beside him.

"You okay, kid?"

Jaden shrugged, doing his best to hide his feelings. "Yeah .... I thought I could try again, you know, with the fire thing," he said, gesturing to the tree.

Arud chuckled, "it's still standing?"

Jaden simply gave a slight nod in response. His father gave him a soft punch across the shoulder, "don't rush it. Talents grow at their own pace. I didn't get mine till I was about your age." 

Silence settled over them like a heavy hand. And Jaden wondered what Arud was thinking.

His father's eyes were closed, seemingly enjoying the feel of the night breeze against his skin.

"Ah, yes," Arud exhaled, "there will be a lot to miss out here. Especially if it turns out that we won't be coming back."

Jaden remained silent, staring at the grass beneath his feet.

"Alright, it's time to spill your guts. Why don't you want to leave?"

To that, Jaden gave no answer.

"I know it's a lot to take in," his father continued. "You'd be diving into a world you know little about."

"But no matter what happens, kid, I want you to know that you've got us."

"Don't you think it's better if I stay here?", Jaden asked, quietly.

"That's not.."

Jaden turned to meet Arud's gaze, "there's a reason I don't want to leave dad, and it's not just about what I am, it's about what I could DO"

"You're not ....."

"How do you know that?" Jaden demanded, "You didn't see what happened that day.... I didn't even know I could go that far and we all know that there's a chance it could happen again!" 

Arud didn't seem unruffled by what he had said, " it won't."

"You don't know that."

"I know YOU kid, and that's enough for me!" Arud countered sharply.

"Look" he began again, his voice softer than before, "you can't keep blaming yourself for Ren's death".

"Everyone makes mistakes. The Elders know I have."

Arud sighed, staring down at the grass like he could read something there. 

"Sometimes, we do things we later regret, things we can't change no matter how hard we try.

"But dwelling on them ... well, it doesn't help the situation either.

The best we can do, the best YOU can do, is try to learn from them.

"The past is the past, kid. Don't let that hold you back," Jaden looked away again, watching the dark shape of a dragon fly across the great nightsun.

He exhaled, "I'll .... try. But if it somehow goes wrong...."

Arud smiled, his eyes didn't hold a sliver of doubt when he spoke, and Jaden felt a sick jolt of fear at the trust and confidence that resonated through his words. "It won't kid."