No Rest for the Wicked

Fake Ulyshia City, Narrator A.

The fight was over in an instant. One second, a thundering tornado of lightning, darkness, blood, and babies was crashing through the photo realm; and then, suddenly, the tornado vanished, and X was standing before the corpse of Hermann Schmidt, cut into 17 different pieces, and the unconscious body of Elizabeth Batory.

"Mission accomplished. That leaves us with three other targets on Alexeev's hit list." Said X calmly. He then grabbed hold of Schmidt's decapitated head and threw it into a nearby storm drain leading to the subway. Schmidt's head went into a free-fall as it descended for what seemed like hours down the suspiciously long drain to the subway system of Ulyshia City. Finally, the head crashed down onto the bottom floor of the subway with a loud *SPLAT* right at the feet of Dracula, Artificer, and Necromancer, who looked down at the head with childlike glee.

"OOH LA LA! What a beautiful gift for me." Said Necromancer before pulling out a knife, carving a sigil into Schmidt's forehead, and chanting a few words that made the corpse's eyes light back up to life. Instantly, the reanimated corpse started screaming in agony, realizing he was just a head now.

"OH GOD! WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO ME!?!?!"

Necromancer looked at the screaming corpse with apathy, "I don't know nor care. Anyway, you're going to help me out here since you're not doing much with your life now."

Schmidt stared at the mad zombie-man in confusion and anger, "HOW THE FUCK AM I GOING TO HELP YOU WHEN I'M JUST A HEAD-" He then realized that two pairs of tiny legs and arms had burst from his neck and ears without him noticing. This only added to his confusion and mania. Before Schmidt could speak again, his eyes turned a glowing shade of green, and his mind became wholly trapped under Necromancer's control. "Yes, master. I shall aid you in your quest."

"Very good. Lead the way, Mister decapitated head man!" Under Necromancer's orders, the living corpse walked through the subway tunnels, trying to find any exits or clues to escape the photo realm.

The photo realm was an illogical place with geometry that seemed tailor-made to lead any inhabitants to as many violent encounters as possible. As soon as the three Commanders began their journey through the strange realm, they realized how illogical it was. Necromancer had opened a restaurant door that had suddenly teleported the three of them to the bottom floor of the subway. They mindlessly wandered through the tunnels for fifteen minutes until the head fell at Necromancer's feet. But the head did little to aid them in their quest, as Schmidt only had slight knowledge of the inner workings of the realm. The head led them to an emergency exit door containing numerous native inhabitants of the photo realm.

The native inhabitants of the photo realm appear to be regular humans at first glance, but only when standing at a long enough distance. While the native inhabitants of the realm have some human features, they differ in the fact that their faces are always slanted at some angle, looking like the man in The Scream painting.

When the three Commanders opened the door, the Screamers yelled out in panic before running at the three aggressively. Dracula sensed the danger and pulled out his book to launch an invisible blade that cut all nine Screamers cleanly in half. Necromancer appeared excited at turning these new corpses into allies until the bisected monsters began crawling toward them with as much aggression as they had before. Artificer used his ability to chain the monsters to the ground, leaving them immobile.

Artificer warned the group to hurry forward, "We need to get through them as fast as possible. I'm not sure how long I can keep these maniacs chained down." Heeding his warning, the group ran past the chained monsters, with Necromancer holding the walking head in his hands so the Screamers wouldn't grab it.

At the end of the long hallway was another emergency door, which looked identical to the first. The three Phoenixes had slammed into the door with such force that it broke it off the hinges. Instead of being led to another dark tunnel on the fifth basement floor of the subway, the commanders were met by the brightly illuminated entrance to the second floor. An annoying *BUZZ* sound could be heard from the cheap ceiling lights, and the floors were filthy and stained.

"How are we suddenly on the second floor?" Asked Artificer.

"Nothing in this damn realm makes any sense," Dracula responded.

Necromancer said, "Let's just get out of here through the stairs." At his request, the group ran toward and up the stairs in almost complete unison, trying to escape the subway as soon as possible. Reaching the top of the stairs, they were shocked to see foggy woods at the top of a mountain instead of a subway tunnel. Looking behind them, they could see the stairs were now gone. 

"This just keeps getting stranger and stranger." Said Artificer.

The piece of land the group had found themselves in was part of a hiking trail near the peak of a mountain. A platform with wooden safety rails to view the wilderness from high above was sitting nearby. The group approached the viewing area to get an image of their surroundings and saw a pair of women's shoes near one of the edges. Confused, Artificer looked down from where the woman would have been standing and found a pool of dried blood at the bottom of the fall. The woman would have fallen 300 feet down to the rocks. Looking back up, he could see that the fog was so thick that only the bottom of the mountain could clearly be seen.

The group spent what seemed like a lifetime wandering mindlessly through the wilderness before they were stopped in their tracks by what appeared to be the shell of a giant crab hanging over one of the branches. They all prepared for an attack but were met with silence. Slowly and cautiously, they continued on their path. When they passed through the tree carrying the shell, they saw the freshly killed corpse of a pregnant deer, and its baby was pulled out from its womb and left to die. Each step they took almost seemed like a new, freshly dead animal had appeared from nowhere. A dead bear was lying on its back with all four legs ripped out, dozens of various birds were splattered across the ground, and a group of coyotes had been decapitated and left to rot.

Suddenly, the moving figure of a living animal could vaguely be seen through the fog. Its body and head were undoubtedly nonhuman, or even demihuman, and it was walking on two legs. The creature approached the men slowly, stepping through the fog to reveal its appearance.

The creature standing before them had the face of a blue octopus, a bipedal shark's body, and a crab's arms. It was the Aquatic Chimera. But most peculiarly of all, the Chimera was capable of speech.

Sighing in discomfort, the creature spoke in a labored voice that echoed in the air, "More enemies? Fine. I shall dispose of these heathens in the name of the great God of Vampires!" Hearing that title "God of Vampires," Dracula's eyes lit up in shock.

Dracula's head went wild at the mention of that name. God of Vampires!? That can't be possible! I saw him die right in front of me! 

Making the first move, the Aquatic Chimera rushed toward the group attempting to slit their throats with its claws. It only made it halfway there when the now-enraged Dracula cast a spell that launched a crippling burst of wind that sent the creature flying through trees before landing in a nearby lake. Surrounding the foggy lake, the commanders prepared for another attack. Seconds felt like hours as they waited for another move from the Chimera, the only sound present being the hum of the fog. Tiny air bubbles surfaced through the water calmly, making quiet *pop* sounds with each burst. The bubbling slowly increased in pace and sound before the whole thing violently shook in waves.

The lake shook like a violent wave pool, and the water began to boil before a giant blue whale jumped out at the group with its mouth open to swallow them whole. Artificer responded by suspending the creature mid-air with his chains but was quickly met with an army of aquatic minions jumping out from the creature's mouth. Dozens of various fishy abominations emerged from the whale: Trouts walking on spider legs, bipedal turtles with muscular physiques, jellyfish flying in mid-air, giant muscular goldfish walking on two legs, and walking sharks, all of which were filled with insatiable bloodlust.

Artificer set forth dozens of portals to fire green hellfire at the beasts and arms to rip them apart. With Necromancer's power, dozens of coffins emerged from the ground, and zombies emerged from each one. Dracula prepared to attack the beasts head-on with a magical sword of fire.

The aquatic beasts dodged Artificer's attacks as two of the walking turtles gut-punched him and broke his ribs with a *CRACK* that sent him flying upward. Before Artificer could descend, another turtle jumped up to him and sent the Phoenix flying back down with a kick, and the first turtle gave him a swift uppercut in the jaw right before he could hit the ground. Once he landed back on the ground, Artificer brought back the demonic arms from the portals, which grabbed at one of the turtles and tore off an arm before it retreated. Artificer sensed the beasts trying to sneak up from behind him and pulled out a pair of submachine guns he pointed behind his neck before firing off and filling them with a thousand bullets.

Out from Necromancer's coffins came a horde of buff zombies that battled with the small army of fishy creatures, although one coffin remained closed for later. The zombies and fish fought in a chaotic and bloody gang battle; limbs were torn off, heads rolled, and bones were shattered. One zombie pulled out the intestines of a shark and used it as a jump rope. Another zombie paralyzed a shark before using his body as a baseball bat. When the dust settled on the small fight, the zombie was playing baseball with the paralyzed shark as another corpse pitched decapitated heads at him, and he used his "bat" to hit multiple home runs.

Dracula flew into the air with his sword and cut the jellyfish in half. Looking down, he could see the horde of zombies celebrating their victory by dancing, playing decapitated head baseball, and trying their best to sing with the broken voice boxes they had. But their celebrations would quickly be cut short.

The harsh voice of the Aquatic Chimera spoke once more, "The oceans bleed with your violence and cruelty..." the beast slowly arose from the water as he said, "...I shall avenge her."

Out from the waters emerged dozens of giant, sharp tentacles rushing toward the enemies. Artificer pushed Necromancer away before the tentacles impaled him and the zombies he had summoned. Schmidt's decapitated head, still capable of using his abilities, blocked the tentacles with a wall of blood. Dracula blocked the tentacles with a wall of mercury.

The Aquatic Chimera used the tentacles as a distraction to sneak up on Necromancer from behind and kick him right in the spine, his bones breaking with a *CRACK*. The impact sent the commander flying through the lake as he unleashed the final coffin before getting knocked down near the shack. From the coffin emerged the zombified body of a once-living child wearing a burlap sack on his head. His eyes glowed a deep shade of red as he floated out of the coffin. The zombified child flew toward the beast, punching it in the face as Scmidt's head threw three spikes at its back. Not letting up the assault, Dracula slashed at the Chimera in the chest, leaving a deep wound across the abdomen. The zombie child then shot forth a pair of lasers from his eyes that would have cut the Chimera in half had it not blocked it with its pincers. The beast needed to counter their assault as soon as it could.

Using another tentacle, the Chimera cut out the blood spikes from its back and held down the zombie child for just long enough so it could run toward Schmidt's head. The terrified Schmidt could only scream in terror and fire off tiny spikes at the creature before it kicked him across the lake like a soccer ball. Although the spikes impaling it front and back had injured it, the monster was still ready to fight. With the zombie child free from the tentacles, Artificer recovered from the attack, and Dracula prepared for attack; they each lunged at it.

Artificer created a portal above the beast's head to crush it with a hell hand, but the beast side-stepped the attack and punched it into thousands of tiny pieces, the cracking of bones being heard throughout the lake as it attacked. While the Chimera was distracted, Dracula snuck up from behind it and stabbed it in the back as the zombie child punched it so hard its jaw almost detached itself. Meanwhile, Schmidt was running as fast as he could on his tiny legs across the lake to meet with the beast once more. As soon as he was within enough distance to attack, he fired off a blood spear that impaled within the Chimera's neck. It went so far through the beast's neck that it almost stabbed the zombie child's feet. "How do you like that!?" Said Schmidt, who was met with no answer from the monster. The zombie child then attacked the beast with a flurry of punches at one hundred times the speed of sound. *CRACK* and *SMASH* were heard thousands of times as the boy's assault on the monster continued with no pause, determined to kill it mercilessly.

With its life on the line, the Aquatic Chimera summoned a giant shark at the zombie child that bit through his left arm and caused him to pause his flurry of punches. With the child temporarily dealt with, the Chimera pulled the sword out from its chest with such force that Dracula lost his grip on it. Now disarmed, he was unable to pull out his book fast enough before the monster kicked him smack in the testicles and right in the lungs as he tried to scream out in pain before having the air sucked out of him. Now in debilitating pain, Dracula was helpless against the beast as it rushed toward Schmidt once more, grabbed him with both hands and threw him into the stratosphere like an American football. However, he didn't fly far until he hit the edge of the pocket dimension and fell to the bottom of the mountains. Artificer tried to shoot at the beast with two pistols but was stopped when the Chimera cut both guns in half and kicked him with enough force to send him flying through multiple trees. Going back to the zombie child, it used even more tentacles to hold him down and choke him to death.

With the five enemies before it now incapacitated, the Chimera could finally focus its Phoenix energy on its body and heal all the wounds it had suffered in the battle. The Aquatic Chimera was fully confident in its victory as it shouted to the heavens, "DO YOU SEE ME NOW, OH GREAT GOD OF VAMPIRES?!?! I HAVE BROUGHT HONOR AND VICTORY TO YOUR NAME WITH THIS BLOODSHED!!!" The Chimera laughed maniacally as its tentacles tore the zombie child into multiple pieces and prepared to deliver a similar fate to Dracula. The Chimera then recognized the face of Dracula and taunted him, "What a pathetic end for the so-called 'King of Vampires!' You never even had a Phoenix ability, so it is quite fitting you die at the hands of a non-Phoenix beast. This battle has ended in my victory."

"Who said anything about this battle being over? I didn't hear any bells ringing!" Said an unfamiliar voice. Turning around, the Aquatic Chimera could see the face of Michael Exolvun, a man the beast was sure had been killed by it.

Five minutes earlier

Necromancer had been flung across the other side of the lake but was still conscious from the hit. Shit! I better hide before he kills me. He thought as he limped into the shack for cover from the Chimera. He was met with a rather brutal sight upon entering the cabin. Before him sat the dismembered body of Michael Exolvun, who had all four limbs cut off and his stomach cut open. But despite the grave injuries he had suffered at the hands of the beast, he was still alive and able to speak.

"Hey! Mind giving me a hand here?" Necromancer couldn't believe the fact he was still alive despite his injuries. While he was an expert in death, his expertise was in reviving the dead, not prolonging the life of the living despite grave injuries. The two chatted for the next few minutes as Necromancer gave Michael back his limbs.

"So, uh, what the fuck happened here?" Asked Necromancer.

"Oh, this!? It's nothing! I just got snuck up on, is all. I couldn't even do anything before I lost all my limbs. Just hand me those hands, and I'll be good as new."

"No, I mean, how the hell are you still alive? And how will giving you your hands back fix anyth-" Necromancer's words were stopped by the most unexpected sights. As soon as he had placed Michael's arm back in place to where it should be, it reattached itself as if nothing had happened. The same thing happened with his three other limbs. Now able to stand back up, Micheal focused his energy to patch up the wound on his abdomen.

"Thanks for the help. You're not bad for a zombie, so I'll fix things up here as thanks." Michael confidently walked out of the cabin, casually stretching his arms and legs before leaping into action. Standing on the lake's other side, he shouted at the confidently celebrating Chimera. The beast had a look of shock on its face as it stared at the somehow living Michael.

"How are you alive? I saw you die!" Said the Chimera in apprehension.

"Oh, that? I was just playing dead. Here, let me thank you for all the pleasant memories you've given me." The Chimera blinked once, and in the fraction of a second, between its eyes blinking and opening back up again, Michael went from being on the lake's other side to right in front of him and launching a punch at his face. The Chimera focused all of its energy on hardening the skin of its face but could feel the skin somehow softening to paper in the instant before Michael's punch met with its face. The Chimera was sharply aware of every nerve of its face burning up with pain as the punch cracked its skull open and sent it crashing down to the ground. The force of the impact was so great that it left a massive crater in the ground.

How is this possible?! I hardened my skin! Thought the Chimera as Michael grabbed it by the neck, swung it around, and then threw it into the air.

All around Michael emerged more of the Chimera's aquatic beasts, even more numerous than the army that fought the Commanders. As they slowly approached him, Michael merely picked up a rock from the ground and threw it at one of the beast's chest. The moment the rock made contact with the monster, it created a massive hole through its body, far more deadly than any rock should have been capable of. But that wasn't all, as the rock started to teleport all throughout the army of beasts, smashing through their bodies before teleporting in front of another monster to kill it as well in rapid succession. Within a second, all thirty of the beasts were dead on the ground with massive holes through their bodies.

Then, before the Aquatic Chimera could even know what was happening, Michael had teleported behind it and delivered a kick through its back that sent it tumbling back down.

"I shall not fall in battle! I will bring glory to my master's name!" Shouted the Chimera as dozens of tentacles burst through the lake, surrounding Michael in an attempt to squeeze the life out of him. Suddenly, their pace slowed to almost a stop right before reaching Michael, who proceeded to karate-chop all of the tentacles into tiny pieces. Michael then suddenly vanished from the monster's sight once more, before it sensed his presence directly behind it. Now behind the Chimera once more, he sent his fist straight through its chest, splurting blood everywhere. The beast then tried to clamp down on Michael's neck with its pincers, but he was gone once more.

"It seems to me like you're slowing down a bit. Come on! Where's that fury you had just a moment ago?" Michael taunted to the beast.

"I shall make you suffer the pain of a thousand deaths, foul human!" Responded the Chimera in anger before dashing toward Michael. It ran at Michael with all of the fury and rage it could muster within its soul, desperate to destroy its enemy. But as the beast ran to Michael, it began to notice its speed was rapidly dropping the further it approached him.

"What's wrong? Slowing Down? And I thought you were going to make me 'die a thousand deaths.'" The beast was at a loss for words as no matter how much force it put into its legs, it was unable to move faster than a snail's pace. It was moving so slow that one of its legs had been suspended in the air for ten seconds, slowly inching its way toward the gound. The beast had no idea what was happening to it.

"I bet you're wondering what's happening, aren't you?" Said Michael to the beast. Almost as if reading its mind, Michael explained what was happening, "Not like this really matters now, but this is all a result of my Phoenix Ability: Absolute Division. It's a little hard to explain, so I'll just demonstrate it for you instead. Here, take a glance at that rock right there."

The Chimera glanced to its left in the direction where Michael was pointing at and saw a large rock at the edge of the lake. "Let's say that the distance between us and this rock is currently at one-hundred percent, which translates to the division sign one hundred out of one hundred. Now, let's see what would happen if, for instance, that distance was divided by half." Michael snapped his fingers, and immediately the rock was half as far away from them, or twice as close.

Michael then continued his demonstration, "But don't think division can be limited to something so simple. Let's try a more complicated exaple: this is what happens when an annoying monster has its defense divided by two million." Michael then brought his fingers to the Chimera's face and flicked his fingers on its nose. Despite using such a childish means of attack, his fingers had sent the thing flying so fast that its velocity set it on fire before CRASHING into one of the nearby mountains, splitting the entire formation into two.

Appearing in front of the beast once more, Michael said, "Here's what would happen if the distance between us were divided by ninety-nine one-hundredths. And here's what would happen if your injuries were divided by twenty," and almost all of the Chimera's wounds patched up instantly before he grabbed it by its throat once more. "Here's what would happen if my strength were divided by .5 percent." Suddenly, Michael's grip on the beast doubled in intensity. "And here's what happens when I double the gravity in this realm." At that moment, the force weighing down on the beast was multiplied by two, and the weight of the beast was also doubled without Michael announcing it.

"Now, why don't we switch our attention from Mathematics to Science? Let me demonstrate to you the power of gravity." In that moment, Michael had doubled the speed at which the beast would descend to the ground, divided the force of air-resistance down to almost nothing, divided the distance between the top of the mountain they were standing on and the bottom of the ground by .5 percent, and then further divided the beast's defense by ten-thousand.

"Well, it was fun talking to you, but I really must be on my way. When you reach whatever pit of hell you're going to, make sure to tell Satan to not only go fuck himself, but that he's not getting a hold of my soul for at least another decade. Well, toodeloo, you fishy fuck!" Michael threw the Chimera as far into the air as it could go before it fell down to the ground at impossible speeds. Tumbling down the length of two Empire State Buildings, the Chimera reached speeds of almost light speed before it made a loud and violent SPLAT on the ground and was left as nothing more than a red stain on the ground. Michael took a moment to admire his work before teleporting back to the lake, where the unconscious bodies of Artificer and Dracula being tended to by Necromancer and Schmidt's head which had just walked back from the bottom of the mountain.

"I'll help you out here as thanks for saving me once. But don't think I'm in your debt." Snapping his fingers, Michael divided the injuries of the two Phoenixes down to a thousandth of what they once were, patching up all of their wounds. Looking to his left, he could see the corpse of the zombie child, dead once more. He looked at the zombie in shock and felt his chest almost burst open in panic.

Jason!? Is that you? No, it can't be. I'm just seeing things. He thought, not wanting to face the reality before him. Michael forced himself to ignore the familiar corpse and walked back into the woods, where a wooden door with the words "EXIT" painted on it in red had appeared.

As Michael walked through the door and exited the pocket dimension within a pocket dimension, he thought about that girl he was with before, and wondered if she was still okay. Not wanting to feel guilty if she ended up dead, he tried to force himself to forget about her and the dead child he had seen.