Weight Of Not Apologizing

Bral then said, stretching his arms behind his head. "Well, in that case, let's explore this town a little bit. It's the heart of trading for this region of Elandria, after all."

Bao and Idin immediately lit up at the idea. "Yeah, I'm in," Bao said with a grin. "It's not often we get to see a place like this."

Amukelo glanced at Pao, who had remained quiet since they left. She looked thoughtful, almost distant, her fingers gripping the strap of her bag a little tighter than usual. He could see the slight furrow in her brow, the way she was chewing on her lip ever so slightly—a telltale sign that her thoughts were weighing on her. Before anyone could notice, she quickly put on her usual excited expression, forcing a smile.

"I want to go to a magic shop!" she announced. "I want to see if they have any interesting grimoires."

Amukelo, however, wasn't fooled. He had spent enough time around Pao to recognize when she was forcing herself to act a certain way. She wasn't actually interested in the grimoires this time. She probably just wanted to be alone, to sort through whatever was going on in her mind.

Bao, however, sighed and rolled her eyes playfully. "Of course you do. Well, I guess it's always been this way."

Then she turned to Bral, Idin, and Amukelo. "So, what do we want to see first?"

Idin, rubbing his chin, said, "I think I'll check out the tailors first. If this place is as big on trade as they say, there's got to be some high-quality craftsmanship here."

Before anyone else could speak, Amukelo suddenly found himself blurting out, "Ughh… I guess I'll go with Pao. Do you mind?"

The words left his mouth before he fully processed them, and immediately, Pao snapped to attention, her eyes widening in shock. "Huh..? Why? No, no... I..." Her voice faltered as she fumbled for words, her face turning an unmistakable shade of red.

Seeing her reaction only made Amukelo flustered himself. He quickly turned his gaze away, rubbing the back of his neck as he stammered, "Ughh… I mean, I just want to see the grimoires…"

The moment the words left his lips, Bral, Idin, and Bao's faces all went completely flat in deadpan unison. "See the grimoires?" Bao repeated.

Idin squinted at him suspiciously. "And since when are you interested in grimoires?"

Amukelo's blush deepened as he waved his hands slightly, trying to explain himself. "Well… I mean… I want to, ughh… you know. Talk about something."

Idin, still skeptical, raised an eyebrow. "So, do you want to talk about something, or do you want to see grimoires?"

Bral, meanwhile, placed a hand over his heart dramatically, sighing. "Ahh… how love can be so blinding."

Bao groaned and rolled her eyes. "Okay, okay, let's leave them alone before Bral makes them even more awkward."

Amukelo shot Bral a glare, while Pao, still blushing, quickly looked away, pretending to focus on a particularly interesting rock on the ground.

Bao crossed her arms and smirked. "Well, in that case, let's meet back at the merchant's guild when Father said."

Pao, still flustered, nodded. "Let's do that."

With that, the group split up, Bral, Idin, and Bao heading off towards the marketplace while Amukelo and Pao turned towards the magic shop.

As they walked side by side, Pao kept her gaze ahead, pretending to be interested in the various merchant stalls lining the road. Amukelo, however, wasn't fooled. He had seen the hesitation in her step, the way she kept fidgeting with the strap of her bag, how she kept chewing the inside of her lip—small tells that only someone paying close attention would notice.

He let the silence linger for a moment longer before finally asking, "You don't really want to see grimoires this time, do you?"

Pao snapped her head toward him almost instantly. "I do! Of course, I do. I love magic." Her voice was a little too quick, a little too defensive.

Amukelo sighed. "So what are you looking for?"

Pao opened her mouth but then hesitated. "Ughh… I mean. I don't know. I just want to see what they have."

Amukelo stopped walking and turned to face her fully. "You don't have money anyway," he pointed out. "You just wanted to be alone, didn't you?"

Pao lowered her gaze, shifting uncomfortably under his scrutiny, but she didn't say anything. That was all the confirmation Amukelo needed.

He let out another sigh, running a hand through his hair before crossing his arms. "Are you thinking about what you told me back in the restaurant? About your father?"

At that, Pao stiffened slightly and glanced up at him. "How did you know?"

Amukelo rubbed the back of his neck, looking away awkwardly. "Well… when I saw the difference in how you and Bao reacted to your father, that conversation instantly came to my mind."

Pao's lips pressed together, and she looked away again.

After a pause, Amukelo spoke again, his tone quieter this time. "Why are you doing this again?"

Pao furrowed her brows, turning back to him. "Doing what?"

"Hiding what's bothering you." His voice was firm but not accusing. "You told me that when you have an issue, you'd say it straight away."

Pao crossed her arms, her voice coming out more defensive than she probably meant. "Well… but this issue is not about you."

Amukelo let out a frustrated sigh. "That doesn't matter." He reached out and gently grabbed her wrist, making her stop walking. "You could've talked to me instead of trying to avoid all of us."

She looked down at his hand for a moment before exhaling slowly. "I… I don't know how to bring it up."

Amukelo let go of her wrist and shook his head. "I think you should apologize to your father," he said firmly. "He clearly doesn't hold it against you, but it seems to weigh on you. And from last time… I've seen how you can keep things bottled up."

Pao clenched her hands into fists at her sides. "But… but how should I do it?" she asked, her voice small. "I can't. What will he think?"

Amukelo looked at her for a long moment before his expression darkened slightly. His usual easy confidence gave way to something more somber, his voice quieter as he spoke.

"I remember when my mother was passing," he said suddenly.

Pao blinked in surprise at the shift in conversation.

"One time, we had an argument," Amukelo continued, his tone distant, as if he were speaking to himself more than her. "I wasn't eating much to make sure there would be enough food for whatever she wanted during the winter. But she realized that, and she told me to care more about myself."

He let out a bitter chuckle, shaking his head. "But I said that I was doing it for her. And because I was exhausted, I burst with anger—even though I shouldn't have."

Pao watched him, her expression softening as he spoke.

"After that, she fell asleep weakly," Amukelo continued, his jaw tightening. "And I never really apologized."

Silence hung between them. Pao felt a lump form in her throat as she saw the pain flicker in his crimson eyes.