She had no choice!
Even though she knew that the road ahead was full of hardships, she still had to continue on.
Fortunately, everything had just begun, and there was still room for turning things around! Since God had given her a chance to relive her tragic life, she must not let it go to waste!
To be reborn at this moment was a twist of fate, compensation, and also a challenge!
The countless voices filling her ears, just like in her past life, overwhelmed Sang Wan, making her dizzy and as compliant as a wooden puppet, obediently following each command through the rituals until she was escorted into the bridal chamber and sat on the brocade canopy bed adorned with gold-painted landscapes and figures inlaid with raden.
The noisy and boisterous world finally quieted down, but Sang Wan's heart couldn't help feeling restless. The closer the moment of facing each other came, the more nervous she felt.
Recognizing and accepting reality was one thing; integrating into it was another. Her husband, that familiar yet strange, strange yet familiar man, how should she get along with him?
Sang Wan felt a headache coming on!
The heavy phoenix crown seemed to become even heavier, almost breaking her neck.
Sang Wan took a deep breath, carefully lifted the bridal veil, and gingerly removed the phoenix crown, gently placing it on the red brocade quilt embroidered with paired Yuanyang birds and twining lotus patterns.
"Miss, Miss, no, this isn't proper, you should quickly put it back on!" The maid Liu Ya, who had come with the dowry, saw this and immediately widened her eyes in shock, stammering out her words.
The Shi family, deserving of being Qingzhou's richest, made the eldest legitimate son's wedding a spectacle of extravagance, pomp, and ceremony. In just half a day, Liu Ya had seen so much she was dazzled and overwhelmed, involuntarily feeling timid and inferior, not knowing where to put her hands and feet from nervousness. Seeing her young miss lift the bridal veil now gave her quite a fright.
"It's alright, no one will know! My neck is so sore, it's almost breaking; I'll take a rest and put it back on! Don't worry!" Sang Wan twisted her neck, raised her hand and massaged it forcefully, and indeed felt much better, involuntarily letting out a satisfied sigh.
"But, but that, that would bring bad luck!"
"No matter!" Bad luck? In her previous life, she followed the rules to a tee, sitting stiffly half the day without daring to move even a finger, but what was the result? Was it auspicious? Could it get any worse!
"But, this, it goes against the rules, the Shi family will laugh…"
"Heaven knows, earth knows, you know, I know, as long as we don't talk, who will know?" Sang Wan blinked and smiled.
"Miss, you're really—" Liu Ya had grown up with her in the countryside, not so strict about rules, and seeing Sang Wan smile like that, she couldn't help but also grin, her heart's anxiety and unease gradually calming a bit.
"Tired from a day's events, are you hungry?" Sang Wan smiled and asked.
Liu Ya hurriedly nodded then shook her head, uttering "Oh right," then suddenly remembered. Pulling out a pink handkerchief from her clothing, wrapped inside were two cakes which she presented to Sang Wan: "Miss, these were given by the lady when we were on our way here, saying that they could make do for filling the stomach. I nearly forgot."
Liu Ya mentioned the "lady" – Mrs. Fang, Sang Wan's elder sister-in-law.
"It's so thoughtful of my sister-in-law to remember me!" Sang Wan felt her nose tingle, almost bringing tears to her eyes. In her previous life, due to her weakness and naivety, her brother and sister-in-law had undergone great humiliation while visiting the Shi family; Mrs. Fang could not stand any wrongdoings, and after a big argument, she threatened to cut ties with her from then on and stormed out with her husband and niece. From that moment onwards, they indeed had no more contact! Because of this, not only did the servants in the Shi family mock and belittle her behind her back, but her mother-in-law and husband also took a strong dislike to her.
"Really, the lady is so kind to Miss, with a heart soft as tofu despite her sharp tongue!" Liu Ya watched as Sang Wan took the cakes in her hands and stared at them absently, swallowing unconsciously.
Feeling warmth in her heart, Sang Wan took one cake for herself and offered the other to Liu Ya, "Here, one for each of us!"
"Ah, thank you, Miss!" Liu Ya beamed as she took it, biting into it right away.
"Miss," Liu Ya suddenly stopped, looked at Sang Wan with a grin and said: "The master's family is so rich, I wonder how many delicacies they have! In the future, Miss, you'll surely live in the lap of luxury! And as your maid, I'll also get to bask in reflected glory!"
Liu Ya's eyes gleamed, and her pretty oval face showed a mix of innocence and longing, her mouth slightly smiling, just like Sang Wan initially was.
Sang Wan's heart sank immediately, feeling a lump in her throat.
"Liu Ya," Sang Wan thought for a moment, then spoke earnestly to Liu Ya, "We've grown up together since we were little, and I've always regarded you as a sister, so I won't hide this from you. With my background like this, marrying into a family like the Shi family, and with my husband being the eldest legitimate son of the main family, I'm afraid, our days will not be easy!"
"How could that be!" Liu Ya exclaimed in surprise: "You are the Shi family's main madam, married with a formal proposal and betrothal gifts!"
"That's exactly why it won't be easy!" Sang Wan stated decisively: "Our Sang family's current situation probably can't even compare to the Shi family's stately servants. Think about it, if I take a high position, how could others be convinced? This way, how much trouble will arise!"
Liu Ya was still puzzled, staring blankly at Sang Wan, barely managing a smile, she shook her head, "I, I just can't understand…"
Sang Wan smiled wryly; Liu Ya was straightforward and had a simple rural life, it wasn't strange that she didn't understand.
"Let it be! Liu Ya, you just need to listen to me. In this house, don't take one step more than necessary, don't say one word more than necessary! Do you understand?"
"Yes, I understand! I just need to listen to Miss!" Liu Ya replied with a relieved smile, and the two looked at each other.
As the sky grew dark, Sang Wan had put the phoenix crown back on and covered her head with the veil, sitting upright on the bed. She heard the faint sound of footsteps accompanied by cheerful laughter getting closer and Sang Wan's palms tightened, her body tensed up.