Chapter 4

AGNES

Two days have passed after that night.

Never heard from him nor see him again after that. I don't even know his name.

But I remember every details about his soft but mysterious face. His soft hands, but rough in bed.

I want that.

For seven months after Ino, Every man that has me in bed, treats me like a fragile figurine that which can be broken immediately.

But that night with that stranger, he didn't treat me like a broken glass. He fucked me hard and rough, which I didn't know was what I wanted until him.

That's why there's a part of me that feels like I regret why I didn't take his number or even his name, because I wanted to have him more. Not more so we can have a relationship, No. That is not what I meant, more I mean the sex.

I still can't afford to have a relastionship as of the moment, and by the looks of him, I know he is not the type to settle.

The only thing I remember about him is his tattoo on the back of his hand. From what I witness, he doesn't have any other tattoos except the one on his hand. It was a white one rose with shattered glass all over it. It looks cool, I think the moment I saw it. I appreciate his tattoo, and it seems kind of familiar the more I look into it.

A snap of a finger breaks me in my trance. "Hey, are you alright?" it's Sol.

I clears my throat and continue looking at the microscope, I even forgot that I am still in class while thinking of him.

And meaning, thinking of him makes me turn on. "Yeah, I just didn't get enough sleep last night."

"Why?" She looks and asked me with worry.

Beside Olive and Gage. Willow and Sol knew my story, I didn't hide it from them.

I sighed "I have been skipping therapy lately. And I think it took a toll on me again." I says in a small voice, trying to be quiet because we have our health professor discussing in the front.

"Why did you stop going to your therapist? Is there a problem?"

I shook my head, "I tried if I could do it now without my therapist." I chuckled sadly "--but, I think I still can't."

Sol holds my hands and squeeze it "You have us now, Agnes."

I nod and smiled at her, appreciating her kindness "I know."

After class, Willow, Sol and I headed to the cafeteria meeting Olive, Gage, Mina and Kevin.

When I sat down beside Olive and starts eating, Olive hugs me. She looks like she was about to pssed out, and after smelling that she reeks of alcohol, I know she has a terrible hangover. Gage looks at me and snobbed Olive. For their two years relationship, that's what he and Olive often fight about. I think Olive is addicted to alcohol. Growing up with an alcoholic father, I guess she got that from the environment she had since she was young. But what I love about her, is her being herself and her being carefree and not caring about others. She is not afraid of being judged.

I pat her head "You should stop drinking when it's school night."

"I know right." She groans "--but I just can't."

I chuckled "Stubborn."

My phone starts vibrating, I froze in my sit thinking that Ino must've been the one calling.

Everyday for a month now, he has been texting me stuff like how much he missed me, like how sorry he was or how much he loves me.

It's kind of putting me off guard since I am still afraid and scared about his wife.

Or maybe, it was just my guilt towards his wife and his child, that apparently I took part of getting his family broken.

Thinking that I am party responsible for a child to grow up without a complete family is what have been haunting me since.

I just cannot think how awful and sad and in pained that child must be.

"Why aren't you answering your phone? Someone is calling you." Olive said.

I smiled awkwardly "It can wait." Afraid that she might see who it is and be worried for me again.

"What if it's important."

I smiled and fish my phone out of my medical coat slowly, hands shaking.

I took a deep breath to see the caller ID, and released a huge sigh of relief when I see it is Mom.

"Mom?"

"Hey, busy bee. Are you doing something?" Mom says more cheerfully on the other line that I find it odd.

"Not actually, just having lunch, why? Is there a problem?"

Olive immediately looked at me. She is close to my family.

"No, not all. You think you can go home this weekend here in Brooklyn?" Mom asked.

I thought really hard, I hate going back in Brooklyn.

I breathes.

"It's important. I-- we have to tell you something." Mom seems desperate and hesitant.

"We?"

"Yeah, David and I."

I close my eyes, having the idea of what she is about to say.

I have met her boyfriend David three months ago. He looks handsome and a bit of have a playboy aura at his age, but I can see how he and my Mom is so happy, especially being together.

I am selfish to think of this, but having to see Mom the way she used to be happy with Dad gives me heartache.

How can someone love somebody else the same way they love a different person? I asked to myself.

Because honestly, I think I couldn't love anyone the same way I love tha wrong person, Ino.

But offcourse, I didn't tell anyone about this. Especially Mom and jeopardized her token to be happy in this life. That is not fair.

"Sure, Mom. If it's important. I will be there."

I heard her sigh in the background "Thank you sweetie. I'll see you, we'll see you this weekend."

"Okay, Mom." I close my eyes. "Bye." And hung up.

I took a deep breath and put my phone back in my coat.

"What is that?"

"Just Mom, asking if I could come over in Brooklyn this weekend."

"Want me to come?" Olive ask.

I smiled "No, just take a rest. I get this. Infact, I heard that the fine arts department will held an annual exhibit this year."

She groans and I laughed "Yeah, I strted ti regret having to enrolled in Fine arts."

"Me too,--"

"You what?" She snaps curiously.

"--regretting that I enrolled in Medschool, not in fine arts."

Olive pouts, she knew that I really wanted to take Fine arts but instead to Medschool since it was my Mom's decision.

She just hugs me from my side and comforted.

I guess, I will be late again in my home tonight.