Chapter 59: Friend-ly

Natsume hands me the other end of a sheet, gesturing for me to help him. I do so without question, given that he's still going out of his way to help. We make the bed and put a couple of pillows down. I recognize the comforter that they let me use when I stayed here.

The room itself hasn't changed. Since no one lives here normally it's not like they have personal belongings they need to move in and out. It brings back memories of staying up late writing essays before going downstairs for a midnight snack with Ema. I used to wonder if that was what living in the university dorms was like. If I could afford it I might have chosen that option instead.

Though I probably wouldn't have met Natsume-san in that case.When we finish making the bed Natsume takes a seat at the desk. He angles the chair so he's facing the door, not me directly.

"How is Shin-kun?" he asks.

I shift my feet. "He's doing fine. Tsubaki-san and Azusa-san are showing him their anime downstairs. I didn't want to interrupt."

"I see." Natsume frowns, but he seems relieved. Maybe he's glad that it's Shin who's got his older brothers' attention right now rather than him.

Must be rough having so many brothers. Meanwhile, I'm struggling with just the one.

My hands fidget at my stomach. "They like the same anime," I say. "I never knew Shin was that into the behind-the-scenes things."

"Tsubaki and Azusa can be helpful when they want to be." Natsume crosses his arms.

"They did help a little bit that time." For as much as Tsubaki is over the top, I can't deny that he's good at diffusing tension. Even if his bright personality overwhelms me."

Shin-kun was shy around them at first, but when he found out they were voice actors for one of his favourite anime he relaxed a little."

I take a breath, then go on to ask about about the bigger issue at hand.

"So... ano..." My hands shake some more. "What happened? I mean, what happened when you found Shin? I hope he wasn't rude to you or anything." I swallow, praying that I won't have to apologize for any more of my brother's transgressions. Yes, I understand that he's going through something, but that doesn't excuse any poor behaviour. Besides, I'd rather not make any bad impressions on the Asahina family whom I already owe so much to.

Natsume's frown stiffens and he leans forward a little. "Nothing really happened. I found him outside a convenience store. He didn't have any money, so I bought him a drink and then brought him here. I hope that's okay. I just figured he'd be more open to staying with my family rather than at my place." He clears his throat. "You've also been here before, so I thought it would be more comfortable for you as well."

The thought he put into it makes me all the more glad that it was Natsume who was with us earlier today. He's closer to the idea of what I imagined a responsible adult to be. No wonder Shin felt more comfortable coming back with him than me.

"So he didn't say anything weird to you?" I press.

"'Weird'?" Natsume shakes his head. "He'd calmed down by then. If anything, I don't think he knew what to do next."

Shin had no phone, no money, and no idea about where to go next. He could have tried to go back home on the train, but that would mean going back to our parents. It would mean facing what he said to our mother, and he's clearly not ready for that. Alternatively, he could have tried to find us again, but Shin didn't know his way around Tokyo. There was no way he could've found me unless I was looking for him.

"I'm glad you found him," I say. I bow deeply to him. "Thank you so much for helping us today. It wasn't my intention to get you and your family involved."

I have to make sure this is the last time I burden the Asahinas. I was Ema's friend before, so them helping me was more understandable. But helping out my brother, whom they've never met until now? It must have come so out of left field that I can't imagine anyone being fully alright with taking on the responsibility for another person. My face burns just thinking about it.

"You don't need to worry about that," Natsume says. "It's not you who put Shin-kun in a situation where he felt like he had to run away from home.

"I lower my head. "I still shouldn't have yelled at him like that. If I hadn't, you wouldn't have needed to chase after him—after both of us."

Natsume's frown relaxes. "I got involved because I wanted to help. You would've done the same if you were in my shoes."

I would hope I would, but I can't say for sure. I think I'd be too worried about overstepping the boundaries. Or about offending someone by stepping in to help. What if what I tried to do ended up making things worse? There's no way I'd be that confident in myself. I'm not so mature that I can accurately judge when to act or not.

"Either way, there's no point in beating yourself up about it," Natsume continues. He stands and walks over to me, reaching out to pat my shoulder. "Shin-kun is okay and hopefully you two will be able to talk things out. By the sound of it, he regrets how he acted, too. I bet he wants to make up but doesn't know how."

I scoff. "That'd be a miracle." Shin's so stubborn that he'd never admit he was wrong. When we were younger we got into so many fight, all of them ending in a draw or a stalemate. No matter what we feel at the time, there's no winning or losing when it comes to your siblings.

Natsume pats my shoulder again, as though to emphasize that things aren't as bad as I think they are.

"Why don't you try talking to him again? If you want, we can leave you two to talk alone." He smirks. "I'll make sure Tsubaki and Azusa don't try to eavesdrop."

I manage to smile. "Thanks. I'd really appreciate that, but I wonder if it's okay to single him out right now."

The last time I tried that I ended up yelling at him. Having others around might help remind me to keep my head.

Natsume hums, considering the best course of action. "How about dinner first, then? Kyo-nii invited me to stay for dinner. He's probably making enough for you and Shin, too."

I raise my head. "Are you sure? I don't want to impose."

"It's not imposing if we're the ones inviting you," Natsume says. "I promise you that if you were bothering us we'd say so. You'd know if my brothers were fed up."

"What about you? Are you annoyed with me?"I don't know why that comes out of my mouth. As much as my mind screams to take it back, maybe part of me wants him to say it's okay to rely on him a little longer. Consistent validation should be allowed for the first little while.

The tips of Natsume's lips twitch. His smile is small, and if you blink you might miss it, but the warmth from it gives me strength again.

"Mn. If it were a problem I'd say so."

With both of our honest feelings laid out, I feel a little better. If I were still in that dark place I might have pressed some more, wanting to know just how bad he thinks the drama is, or throw in some more self-depreciating comments. But it's dawned on me that part of being a mature adult is knowing when to trust other people's words. Not just in terms of whether what they say is true or not, but also in the sense that you yourself can trust yourself to believe in them.

With Ema, it's easy for me to trust in her words. I knew her before any of the Asahina brothers, and we've had a chance to be friends before she started helping me out. As for Natsume, our introductions were brief, and it wasn't like we were meeting with the intention of becoming friends.

We aren't close enough to be called "friends". We're only acquaintances. He's the older brother of my friend, someone who can be relied. If I had an older brother I think I'd hope he was like Natsume.

"Thank you for saying that. I'll do my best." 

—————

Natsume and I head back downstairs. My instinct is to steer into the kitchen and avoid seeing Shin before supper, but Natsume stiffly eyes the living room. Not exactly subtle, but I get the message. I take a deep breath, steadying myself for whatever's to come, then go in.

"Oh, it's Tsukiyo Mai-san!" 

Tsubaki is the first to notice me, as expected. He waves joyfully and beckons me over. Azusa simply smiles and makes room. In between them Shin's excited expression grows dull. He purses his lips, probably wondering what I'm doing here. 

With only a nod I take my seat beside Azusa, causing Tsubaki to pout. 

"It's been a while, huh, Tsukiyo Mai-san? Imouto-chan's not the only one who's missed having you around." He stands up to greet me before Azusa shoots him down.

"We haven't told Shin-kun the best part yet," he says. "We should finish the story first."

"Oh, right." Tsubaki plops back down and drapes an arm on the back of the couch behind Shin. My brother shifts uncomfortably, angling away from me. 

"Mai-san is your onee-san, right, Shin-kun?" Azusa prods him.

My brother grunts in response. "Mn."

"Oho? Aren't we lucky to both have cute sisters?"

" Tsubaki glances between us. I roll my eyes. 

Shin wrinkles his nose. "Mai? Cute?"

"Of course she's cute! When she and imouto-chan were together it was so much fun. We got to eat dinner together and chat after hours. Tsukiyo Mai-san even invited us over to her place."

Shin gags. "Why do you know all these ikemen?"

His tone implies it's an insult—like I shouldn't know a bunch of handsome men—but I'm more worried about Shin's attitude putting off his hosts.

"Now, now." Tsubaki swiftly intervenes. "Why shouldn't Tsukiyo Mai-san know a lot of handsome men? After all, there's nothing handsome men want to do more than dote on cute girls." 

Shin sniffs. "Mai isn't the type of girl who gets doted on. She doesn't even like that kind of men." 

Oh? So he's been paying attention after all.

"And why do you keep calling her 'Tsukiyo Mai-san'? No one uses full names. That's just weird."

I cough, not wanting to get into that story, though I agree wholeheartedly that Tsubaki is weird.

"My younger brother used to like being doted on," I say. "When we weren't fighting we got along pretty well. I remember letting him have the last mochi every time we got some."

Shin snorts. "My older sister only let me have the last mochi because Kaasan made her give it up. She'd never let me have it out of the kindness of her heart."

"Kaasan"? He called her "Kaasan"... 

I smirk. "Oho. I guess my younger brother would never kindly let me watch my new shows even when his own shows were just reruns. He kept saying it's more important to appreciate the old than the new."

"My older sister could catch new shows as reruns like I do. It's not that hard."

The twins exchange glances, having been somewhat ignored by Shin's and my sibling spat. Natsume thought Shin regretted what happened before, and while my brother has yet to mention anything about it I'm actually glad that we're able to fight like usual again.

"I think dinner's almost ready," Tsubaki says. "We should go help them set up."

"Yes. Let's help Kyo-nii and Ema-chan, since they're doing so much for us."

"I'll help, too," I say, falling back into habit from when I lived here.

Shin doesn't respond. He doesn't even react. I want to tell him that he should join us. It's the least he can do since the Asahinas are letting him stay. He stares at me like I'm the weird one.

Luckily, I don't have to do anything in the end. Tsubaki and Azusa both grip one of Shin's arms.

"Oi, what are you doing?!"

"Come on, Tsukiyo Shin-kun! We can't let imouto-chan and your onee-san do all the work for us."

"Indeed, we must show we are men."

Shin's protests are feeble as the twins march him into the kitchen. He dangles from their grasps like a puppet, energetic at first, but at the sight of the other Asahinas in the kitchen he goes stiff as a board. Once the twins get him into the dining room Shin goes quiet and reluctantly agrees to help.

Even though he had to be forced into it, seeing Shin set out the plates reminds me of how he was like growing up. Kaasan would tell him to do something and he'd adamantly refuse, only to be worn down by the fact that she was his mother.

So he's not entirely hopeless after all.I put on a smile and join them in the dining room.