Interlude XX3: What never is

It was dark on the surface. Around the time that everyone would be asleep. But Eliza had unfinished business, someone that she must speak to directly, someone that she owes her greatest of apologies the most. It wasn't Lilly... she had forgiven her, or at least had allowed her to work towards forgiveness.

There was one other person, though, Quinn. Despite how little time Eliza had spent around everyone, even she could see how close Riharia and Quinn were. She approached Deltastring's Command Barracks, walking past a few drones, and a sparse number of engineers and operatives. The air was cool, colder than normal, as she turned towards the door.

"Alright..." Eliza pushed her cheeks up, preparing herself. She opened up the door, entering into the barracks. It was empty... The lights were dim, and the bunk beds along the walls were empty. It seems like no one's here... She sighed. "Guess I'll come back later," she said, turning her head to a small hallway within the barracks.

The lights were bright from there, and she heard voices. Approaching, she kept to the side of the wall. It was a hall leading to another section of the barracks, what seems to be additional bedrooms, with additional bunkbeds.

"Are you sure about this?" A voice asked. Eliza could hear the monotone expressions and uncaring attitude... It had to be Kazuki's.

She listened intently, pressing herself against the wall as she tip-toed towards the doorframe.

Another voice answered. "It... we have no next of line... or kin. But I don't want to see it, sir." The more jumpy and bright voice was Quinn's, though more hollowed out and husky than anything that Eliza recognised from him before. "But I don't want to get rid of it either."

"I see," said Kazuki. Eliza peered into the room, seeing Quinn slumped, legs tucked in beside a bunk bed. Kazuki was sitting down on a seat beside him, the two were looking at a large sealed box on the table. It looked like it was made to last, with the name 'RIHAIRA' stamped onto it.

Her eyes glistened at the label... So that's Riharia's stuff, she thought.

"Sorry, Arbiter... I just don't know what to do and... Claire and Lilly directed me to you... so, sorry for taking up your time," Quinn said, apologising profusely to Kazuki.

Kazuki was wearing casual clothes, though had his contractor's light vest-plate on. Eliza held her breath, waiting for what Kazuki would say to Quinn. She knows Kazuki, he's harsh... but given the circumstances, he must be somewhat lenient, she thought.

"They did the right thing," Kazuki said. He stood up, placing a hand on the box. "I'll have the box placed in my personal storage. For safe keeping."

Quinn looked up at Kazuki. "Will I be able to..."

"Yes." Kazuki cut in, "It could be days, months, years, but one day you will return for it. Doesn't matter if its me, Martinez, or even Archius or Sato at the helm. I'll ensure you get it."

"Thank you... Arbiter," said Quinn.

Kazuki replied, "It's best to try and not think about it. It hurts... I know."

"First Petra... now Riharia... Who's next?" Quinn stared up at Kazuki. Eliza listened in carefully, waiting for a time that she can enter into the conversation...

"I don't know." The words struck Eliza; a lightning bolt from the heavens. That's right... she thought, this was an industry built on corpses... Death is just but a part of life for these people. Kazuki shook his head at Quinn. "If you want to change rooms, just tell Lilly."

"What... do I do now?" Quinn asked.

"I don't know," Kazuki replied. The words dumbfounded both Eliza and Quinn. For once, Kazuki spoke without a harsh malice within his voice, or a vice ready to slam into his enemies. It was just him, Kazuki Geminorum-Ryzaku. "It's different for all of us. Moving on... My advice is simple. Let it hurt. One day, it'll stop."

He stood up, and started to walk over towards the exit.

"You talking from experience...?" Quinn asked. "And uh... you're not mad at me telling Liz, right?"

Kazuki paused, as he picked up the box. Eliza slid back out from view, as she shuffled away from the door frame. He turned back to Quinn and said, "No to both. She was angry, yes... a bit melodramatic—"

WAIT A MINUTE?! SHE'S MELODRAMATIC?! Eliza furrowed her brow, covering her mouth as she ached to fight back against Kazuki... Did he know she was here?

"—but she fixed my exospine, for now. If you have anything else to ask, you know where to find me."

"Yes... sir," Quinn said in a muffled mutter. Eliza heard Kazuki's footsteps, as he exited out from the room. He turned away from the doorway, holding onto the box.

"Kaz..." Eliza trailed off, looking directly at the box. Kazuki pattted her on the shoulder, and then walked by, ignoring her the best he could. She looked back at him, wanting to chase after him, but a noise drew her attention back to Quinn.

First, it was whimpering... Small wails and whimpers. She glanced into the room, seeing Quinn idle, beside the bunk bed. All was quiet, with only the neverending hum of the dreadnought to accompany the two. Slowly, Eliza etched away... she can't talk to him. Not like this. She gulped her own mind down, taking in a deep breath.

Eliza placed her hands together, steeling her nerves. She grabbed onto the doorframe, slowly peering back in. Quinn had his head in his arms, legs pressed against his chest. And not a soul was here to listen. The sight hurt Eliza, though she knew it must have felt even worse for Quinn. Even with no one around, he did his best to shield his crying... was it from others? Or was it from himself...

She didn't know entirely. She walked forward, standing in the doorway. She had to do something, right? Eliza knows she doesn't have an obligation to help Quinn... but still, she has an obligation to go above what is demanded of her. Only then, may she ever consider herself forgiven.

"Quinn," she called out to him.

For a moment, Quinn lingered, before looking up, wiping his face clean. He tried to put back a facade on. "Oi! Liz, you should have knocked! You finally down for that game of Dullie?" he asked, shaking slightly. Eliza saw him pinch himself on the hand.

Well, she thought, it must be hard for him, losing someone so close... Eliza stood still for a moment. She could barely remember how she felt after her mother's death... or Victoria's... She was so mesmerised by what she could have been that she has forgotten how she felt about any of it.

A hollow feeling subsided within her. "Yeah, it's gonna be a while till my next lecture so... why not?" she said. She couldn't confront Quinn, not now, not like this - who is she to confront him? When she can't even remember her own sister's face...

Quinn smirked, standing up. He shrugged, flicking out a holo-card deck from within his sleeves. "Well then, you better be good at playing, because I ain't gonna be playing easy just because you're new!"

The moment of sobbing had passed on Quinn's face. Despite that, Eliza could see the marks and lines of water that once ran from it. Everyone deals with grief their own way... And if playing games with Quinn will help him suffice with the times, then Eliza will play the best she can.

Because what else can she do? She's no contractor, she has no connection to these people, comrades in arms. But is that an excuse? She asked herself.

No.

She stepped forward, exiting out from her comfort as she nodded. "I won't go easy on you either..." she said, "Oh and... no pike meta, please?"