His Swan
The pendant has something more aside from Father's insignia. It's the way Mother held it when she was healing my wound. Thinking about it, it's highly likely that it's a power source of some kind but that's the only other time I saw the pendant so it may not as well be. I couldn't break my gaze away from her pendant as she pinned the broach on the right collar of my green tunic. She opened her mouth as if to say something but just decided to smile at me instead, patting the broach going back to her seat. She gestures to Calista to eat and I do the same to Masid who is currently busy lying flat on the cold floor.
"If you don't mind me asking, Mother." I start, cutting some of the greens on my plate. "What's in the pendant?"
"Oh," She holds the item again with her left hand. "It's you in here or I should say a part of you." She says wholeheartedly. "The pendant is from your Father, so it's only natural that what's inside is a part of you."
"A part of me?" My eyes narrow in confusion but I can't deny that it's a sweet act. Is it a baby tooth? Some nail clippings? My hair? "I would love to see it."
"You wouldn't. Trust me." There's this sincerity to her tone but the intensity of my curiosity is much more overwhelming. I lean forward cupping my chin with both my hands, shifting my weight on the table indicating that I'm waiting for her to show what's inside.
Mother carefully opens the pendant revealing a tiny sealed glass vial drenched in a dark crimson liquid inside it. It's blood. My Blood. She instantly closes and locks it the moment she feels the queasiness overpower my senses. I start to gag so she hands me a glass of water. "As pointed out, you wouldn't love to see what's inside my pendant." Teasing, she walks around the table towards me to gently rub my back to ease this sour knot in my gut I'm feeling.
* * *
The Harvest once again comes for only the Gods know how many more will. As Mother demands, I haven't yet laid my sights on the world beyond the thick walls of this cave. I wonder how the world became after a whole decade passed but not enough wonder for me to defy Mother's wishes. Has the townspeople prospered? Do they still remember their hatred towards us –if that's how they really feel? I'm just basing how I picture the great outdoors on what I'm hearing, but to be honest, I haven't heard much from these past years aside from the whispers of weather changes, the echoes of ships occasionally passing near the seas of the island, and even murmurs of wild animals around the area but other than that, nothing.
Gaining a few more years has been a tremendous boost for me. My skills have flourished as I hoped they would. I even learned how to cook so that's great. I've become exceptional as ever with my hands for both my craftsmanship and my combat prowess. My height and muscles finally decided to proudly flaunt themselves enabling me to do more polished techniques. Thank the Gods I don't look weak and frail anymore. I'm now confident that I'll be able to withhold my sworn vow to protect Mother. Alongside that, I've become lighter on my feet so that I can keep up with Masid during our sparring matches. Unlike before when he always lands a hit on me, I can dodge them more easily like dodging a falling leaf from a tree.
Speaking of trees, the gigantic one in the middle of the cave is still standing strong with no hints of wavering. With whatever climate it may be in, I'm confident that it will not wilt and die on me. I remember deciding to call it the King of Trees one afternoon because that's the constant aura it reverberates towards me. With all the scorching summers, freezing winters, gusty autumns, and some pretty hectic springs, the King of Trees wavered not and continued to hold its ground. It is likely going to do just that until the end of time if I say so myself.
I find myself roaming around the library after training under the mesmerizing shades of the King of Trees. I thought that I read everything in here even the ones I can't truly understand because it's mostly books about witchcraft but the Gods didn't hesitate to correct me. While Masid and I are messing around the library, he accidentally bumps into a bookshelf which I initially thought was built sticking shut into the wall but it apparently wasn't. I see a miniscule opening between the wooden bookshelf and the stone wall so I push it farther to widen the gap. I don't know what I'll find here or if there's anything in here to find really but I still press on.
"There's a strange hole in the wall." Surprised at what I just discovered, I remove the slab of wood that's discreetly covering the hole. The hole is brimming with dust, spider webs, and even carcasses of dead pests like mice, lizards, and some other insects. However, what intrigues me is the wooden box carefully placed farther inside it. I took it. After placing the bookshelf back where it's supposed to be, I open the box and scan its contents. Aside from that funky earthy smell it wafts out, nothing else is in here but a bunch of old, nicely-folded papers.
"To my Swan,
I know I told you this before but I will say it again with all my heart. You're the most beautiful woman I laid my gaze upon. As soon as I saw you, I'm prepared to defy my own destiny if that destiny will not be spent with you…" I read the few lines on it, sending an unusually warm shiver down my spine up until the hairs at the back of my neck. Is this what I think it is? Is this a letter? Are these all Father's love letters to Mother?
Masid, seemingly looking as curious and dumbfounded as I am, hovers over my shoulders to take a peak. I grab the box containing the letters and hold it tight to prevent him from tossing it off from the table and making a huge mess. I never realized these letters are just sitting idly underneath our noses. Does Mother ever plan to tell me about this? I have too many questions assaulting my mind right now but none of those matters. My urges are compelling me to read all these. This is another side of Father that I didn't know he possessed. I now have something more worthwhile to do. Read.
"Your Beloved, Stragis." Well, that's a name I haven't said or heard for quite a while. "Stragis." I repeat just to convince myself that I'm really reading Father's letters to his Swan–Mother. I pick up the next letter, folding the previous one carefully back to the box.
"To my Swan,
My travels aren't as exhilarating as I want them to be. Just thinking about those lonely nights without you makes my heart quench for you. For us. I know you feel it too. My knees tremble at the sight of you, My hands twitch with your touch, and my lips thrash at the thought of your taste. I can't wait to return home…" Father is such a romantic and it's disgusting but if that's how he got Mother, then I commend him for it. I peruse further into the letter then decide to move on to the next. By the heavens, Father's way with words is beyond flattery. It's straight up witchery of itself if I didn't know any better.
"To my Swan,
It's been quite some time since the last I was home. My body and soul aches for you. The demons inside me urge every fiber of my weak and mortal being to leave everything behind and run straight back home so I can do everything my heart desires for you–with your permission, of course. You know I'm respectful like that…" There's no way Father's this dirty. But hey, who am I to judge if I'm the fruit of that dirt? I turned out well, immaculate even. I can't stop myself from smiling while reading some of these letters and my jaw starts to feel numb.
By reading a few more of these, I've confirmed that, as Mother said, Father was a traveling merchant. Some of the things he sells are traded goods from other merchants but the things he's most proud of selling are his sculptures. I didn't see any of his works or maybe they're just hiding somewhere in the library like the letters but I am confident that those are impeccable. If a lot of people are buying his works, it goes to show that his sculptures are surely something to behold. I continue reading the letters while caressing the broach Mother gave me with Father's family crest engraved on it.
It dawns on me. In these dozens of letters, will one of them reveal or give even just a hint of truth on how he passed? I want to know even though I know it will hurt. It may sting but at least I'll know how his marvelous story ended. By reading a couple of them earlier, I can already tell which ones are the longing letters, the swan-I-sold-a-lot letters, and even the thirst ones which are the easiest to spot. With all those things Father has written in those letters, I think I need to cleanse my eyes. Truthfully though, notes were taken and they're tightly stashed at the back of my mind. For future references, I guess.
Masid tugs his snout on my right shoulder indicating that he senses something. A series of footsteps are heard coming in closer and closer. Mother. She's here already. I poke my head towards the nearest window of the library and it reveals the night sky. Time really does pass by fast when you're enjoying what you're doing. I have to hide this box back and quickly. In a panic, I grab a handful of letters and tuck them into one of my pockets while the rest of them are back in the wooden box. Masid helps me move the bookshelf open and close as I place the box back where I originally found it. Running back home, I saw Mother carrying a lot of stuff from her baskets so I decided to help her out and thank the Saints that she didn't ask me where I went or anything else. She probably assumes that I just did my usual routine of crafting, combat training, playing with Masid, and everything else.
Our dinner was as uneventful as always but I don't hate it. It's calming. I love her cooking and I love eating dinner with her. She cooked something different this time which she's very proud of but I can't remember the name. However, the taste does do well with my palette. It's like a fountain of flavors with every bite. I asked her what the ingredients were but as expected, I couldn't even pronounce any of them but the food is heavenly tasteful. I can eat this all day or maybe I'm just too exhausted and hungry that's why I have these thoughts. Everything Mother cooks is delicious anyway so it doesn't matter.
I've gone straight to bed after dinner to get back to my reading frenzy. I unfold a bunch of letters and lay them carefully on top of my bedsheets so I can easily see and sort them out. I had Masid's bed nestling at the far corner of my room so he'll be a couple of feet away from making a mess of these letters. He'll understand. It'll just be for tonight. Scanning back to the letters, I notice an odd one. This one has a darker shade of cream tone to it and it appears that there are blotches of various darker shades on some parts of it causing some of the letters to spoil making them slightly hard to read but I think it's still manageable.
Wait. This is Mother's handwriting.
"To My Beloved,
My heart wails with endless sorrow as I write this letter. I failed to protect you. I failed to protect our son.
I wasn't strong enough. I know you long to meet our baby for the longest time but the Gods didn't allow that to happen. I know you won't be able to read this anymore but this is the only way I know to ease my longing for you. I wish I could say that my heart died with you but I can't. I can't let you go. I won't. Never.
Don't worry. Even if you're gone, your memory will live on and our son will love you as much as I do. You will not be forgotten. I promise.
I swear until my dying breath, I will make them pay. This is not the end. This is not how our love will end.
I will defy my destiny for you.
Your Swan,
Integra"