Logic vs. Feelings

"Oh, that was a mistake," Sophia said, her face feeling hot and a hand politely over her mouth. "I really overestimated myself here."

Luca was halfway through a second chance when he realized Sophia was staring miserably at the carafe.

It was already nearly halfway gone. Normally they nearly put an entire bottle of wine in those things. Not to mention they usually added something additional like brandy. Except she didn't want Luca to take care of her if she got unstable. It wouldn't look good when she was doing her best to make him run in the opposite direction rather than feel obligated to stay by her side.

"You really can't hold your alcohol, can you?" he asked, not holding back his amusement.

"Well, I don't know if you noticed, but I'm a little bit smaller than you are," she said running a hand through her hair. "Do you think you can hold your alcohol?"

"I guess we're going to find out," he responded.

Luca hadn't considered it before. There were no thoughts about alcohol in his mind. He only knew that it got someone drunk but he didn't know how it pertained to himself.

There was a lull in conversation as Sophia contemplated her decision in the past week. It was like something had snapped inside of her. She took in a strange man, separated from her boyfriend, and now she was getting drunk in a place that knew about her when she was a child.

"You know, I kind of blame this on you," Sophia suddenly said, hardly believing the words coming out of her mouth.

Luca wasn't expecting Sophia's sudden words and blue eyes that were once on the drink sitting between his hands snapped up to her. His eyebrows were raised in curiosity, but his smirk was amused as if he already knew.

His smug face was irritating Sophia more than normal.

"What do you blame on me?" he asked. "Am I making you feel something?"

She looked shocked for a minute and nervous like she was when he decided to corner her in the bakery. Her face was already flushed.

"I don't want to be thinking about anything right now, but you're making me think about a lot of things," she said, flustered.

She wouldn't admit feelings, only thoughts. It would be bad if he realized that she did have some kind of feelings for him. She was the one who had to get over them and let him move on with his life so she could move on with hers. It would be better if they cut each other loose from the beginning so that he would never have to be disappointed in her.

"I'm not going to stop," he said.

Before she could ask what he meant, the food was brought out. Luckily it seemed to be a slow Sunday evening and only a few others were dining there.

The food was fast so Sophia could escape the situation quickly.

They thanked the man for his hospitality and started to eat, Sophia was grateful for food to occupy her mouth since her alcohol-laden brain would stop talking.

She had expected herself to be more honest but she had forgotten how long it had been since she drank anything.

What was worrying for her was that, between bites, Luca continued to drink. It was like he was determined to get in the same state of mind as her. She silently hoped that his size would save him and he wouldn't get drunk from all that he was drinking.

"The food is good," Luca said. "You were right in your choices as usual." 

Sophia wanted to glare at the man sitting across from her but he seemed so pleased with the food that all she could do was reach for her glass of water and try to distract her mouth more so she wouldn't say anything stupid until she sobered up just a little bit more. 

"Glad you like it," Sophia said quietly. "I'm not sure if I make good choices or you just like food."

"Both," he said. 

It seemed to be a usual pattern that Luca finished his food before Sophia. However, there were no further mentions of the serious conversation they needed to have. Whenever he let the topic go, her heart relaxed for a minute but she knew that it was only a matter of time before it was brought up again. 

She hated how considerate he was being to her for not making it awkward. It was making her resolve weak. She didn't know if she could tell him no.

As she finished eating, she stole the occasional glance at him, trying not to linger for too long but her heart was suddenly filled with the what ifs. Her body's unfair pull on him when she couldn't even offer him anything physical was too much for her to handle. 

They finished their food with only a few more words between them. He offered to pay for the bill but she shook her head and handed the waiter her card instead. She wasn't about to take his tip money from him when he earned it fair and square. He had refused hourly pay from her since he was living in her house anyway. She didn't like free labor. 

The old man told Sophia that he hoped he would see her soon and she knew that it was time to let the past be the past and pay attention to people who knew her when she was young. After all, the neighborhood was her home for her entire life. The rowhomes that were down the street were the last place she lived with her grandparents before she went abroad. 

When the old man was out of sight, Sophia sighed, took her napkin off of her lap, and placed it on the table. 

"I'm not looking forward to this walk," she said quietly. 

"Why is that?" Luca asked. 

The chairs they were sitting in were tall and when she slid off of it and onto the floor, she stumbled forward until a strong muscular arm reached out and caught her. 

She gripped his shoulder and turned to look at him, her expression alarmed. 

"That's why," she uttered.