Chapter 69 part 2

However, as she was about to go through with it, she remembered her roommate and felt she couldn't just leave Jenn here alone. Aside from her adopted children, she didn't seem to have anyone else here.

It seemed to Embris that she needed a friend the most and that waiting a little longer wouldn't hurt that much. Especially since she only could think of trying to go to where Feon had said in her letter that they'd found a marquis who was willing to help them. That apparently Amelia looked exactly like the marquis' wife or something. Embris wasn't sure she really understood that part, but couldn't think of another way to describe it.

However, as she thought about Feon's letter, she suddenly thought of something that she should at least do here before she decided to leave. Which was write a letter to Feon and see if she could get it sent by someone. That way she could at least let her know how she was doing as well as what had been going on for her. She knew she was going to mention Jenn and how she'd helped her out as well as encountering the centaurs.

Yet, she wasn't sure where to go for that, but she had a feeling that Tchisa might know. As she seemed to be the one of those in charge.

So, Embris left the building she'd been not only staying in but pacing around for the better part of the past few hours while she debated on what to do and if she really should leave this place.

She couldn't understand why it'd taken her so long to even think of sending Feon a response to her letter. Especially since Embris was confident that Feon and her other siblings were worried about how she was doing as well.

Tchisa was rarely hard to find. She always seemed to be around a lot of activity, regardless of what time of day it seemed to be. As it is, the sun had gone down and it was dark, with only torches burning to give light around them, courtesy of the ever present mist above them.

Embris was able to find Tchisa sitting by herself near the entrance, which she found rather surprising. Not only was Tchisa not organizing a patrol or other, but she was pretty much taking a position as a guard when she could have directed someone else to do that, but she didn't have anyone going up to her for anything. Not to give a report or receive orders.

Well, aside from Embris herself, that is. Though, she couldn't help but feel rather conspicuous at that simple fact.

Her approach was also noticed by Tchisa, even though she didn't look in Embris' direction. Not that Embris was surprised at that fact. Tchisa seemed to be aware of everyone around her all at the same time.

"Can't send you out, sorry," Tchisa said when Embris was a full length away from her.

"Not what I'm here for," Embris replied, hoping that Tchisa would be willing to help. After all, she couldn't recall that being one of the perks that had been offered to her joining this mercenary company. Which also seemed like there was something more than just it being a mercenary company. She just couldn't put her finger on it.

"Oh? What is it then?" Tchisa asked, with a mocking note in her voice. "Have you decided to try for a different trade here? Maybe carpentry?"

Embris sighed. She didn't care for the mockery, but she knew if she took it to heart that she'd likely ruin any chance she had about getting a letter sent to Feon.

"Actually, I was wondering if it might be possible for me to get a letter written to someone," Embris asked, hoping Tchisa would continue mocking her for that.

"Of course you can," Tchisa replied, with no hint of mockery in her voice. Though Embris couldn't help but feel that it wasn't going to be just that simple. "We're not stopping you. I believe if you go to the main building, where most go to have their complaints heard by the Blue Rose, there should be some paper and a pen you could use."

Embris opened her mouth to respond, but then stopped herself. She hadn't expected that response. A 'do it yourself' response wasn't what she'd been hoping for.

"Uh, thing is, I can't read or write," Embris admitted, feeling embarrassed about it even though she couldn't understand why she'd feel embarrassed about it in the first place. It wasn't like she have done anything that could have changed that fact.

Tchisa groaned. "Of course you haven't," she said, sounding almost like she overlooked something obvious. "I should have put you in that class."

Embris blinked. Class? What class?

However, she didn't need to ask as Tchisa continued, "Well, if you go to Polelin you should be able to not only get him to write your letter for you, but also to get you signed up for the literacy class."

Embris opened her mouth to thank Tchisa, but stopped again. This time it was because she hadn't expected something like that. She knew Polelin was in charge of the combat training, since she'd had to prove that she was capable of wielding a sword, or any other weapon before having even been allowed out on the excursion with Jenn to meet with Duchess Versith.

However, she hadn't realized that he was in charge of a class where she could learn to read and write. Part of her wanted to celebrate that news while another part of her balked at the idea of what would be required of her in a class like that. Especially since she didn't know what a class like that would look like in the first place.

Though, she knew she needed to at least acknowledge Tchisa's offer, otherwise she worried that she'd be stuck here for a long time, unsure what to do exactly.

"Th-thank you," Embris managed to get out, stumbling over her words just a little.

Tchisa nodded and Embris was about to turn away when there was a sound from the other side of the entrance.

Tchisa heard it as well, indicated by her straightening up her stance from where she'd been leaning against a growing smaller tree than the ones growing around them.

Embris wasn't sure what to do herself as it wasn't like she'd even been put on guard duty at the entrance before, not that she was now, either. Yet, since she was there, she felt like she should do something to help, but her mind only drew a blank about it in general.

"Get ready to draw your sword," Tchisa said quietly.

Embris felt startled to even realize that she still had her sword strapped at her hip. She'd been forgetting that she had it with her more and more frequently. Almost like it was merely something she put on, like her boots, and didn't think about again after that until it was time to take it off at the end of the day.

However, she still gripped the sheath, ready to draw her sword, not sure what she'd do if they really did have to fight. That was one part of being a mercenary she didn't like. As her mother had explained to her about how some people prepare for a long time to go into battle and are the first to get killed, while others who you'd think would get killed by accident, if nothing else, goes through the battle without a scratch on them.

Embris certainly didn't like the sound of either. As she didn't want others to think of her as that inept, nor did she like the idea of getting killed herself.

Sounds of people walking through the entrance grew louder as Embris felt the sweat on her neck and back slowly sliding down. Almost making her want to wipe it away, even though she knew that any motion could ruin her chance at meeting any attack that could come her way.

Fortunately, a familiar voice sounded out of the darkness before she lost her nerve completely.

"Good to see we have a couple people alert enough to hear us," Jenn said.

"Glad you got back," Tchisa said, going back to leaning against the tree. "I was wondering if maybe you got trapped by the snow or something."

Embris felt like she was missing something. Snow? What's that? The name was somehow familiar to her, but she couldn't quite place it.

"Come on! It's been only two days since I left. We'd have been back sooner, but a few things took longer than expected. I can fill everyone in on it if you'd go round them up," Jenn said.

Tchisa sighed. "I'd like to, but I don't have anyone to stand guard here otherwise. Too many have been sent out on patrols," Embris noticed Tchisa suddenly glance at her, "and this one hasn't been cleared by the Blue Rose to do that just yet. In fact, the Blue Rose said she had something in mind for her and to keep her in the village."

Embris felt her breath catch in her throat. The Blue Rose had something in mind for her to do? She wasn't sure what it was, but had a feeling that it just might be what she'd been looking for to do that would make her feel like her being here was useful and that she had a future here as well.

At the same time, she wasn't sure how to feel about that. She had already made up her mind to leave, but knowing that there was already something specific for her to do, somehow felt like things had suddenly changed. She wasn't sure if that was really a good thing or not.

Jenn sighed, looking like she was a little annoyed by that fact. As if she could do something about it.

Though, what happened next felt strange to Embris. Not only did both Jenn and Tchisa stop talking, but then Tchisa gave a slight nod towards Jenn. It was like they were communicating without saying anything. She wasn't sure how to explain it, but she certainly felt like something happened that she couldn't quite place.

"Well, I'll head to my room then," Jenn said, as if nothing had happened.

"I'll expect you in the morning then, captain," Tchisa said, making Embris feel even more confused. Somehow they'd gone from trying to get all the top people together right then to having it happen in the morning.

"Of course," Jenn said, giving a salute, her actions swift and sure, before turning and heading off to the building where she slept.

Embris was certain something had to have been communicated in that period of silence, but she couldn't think of how. Nothing came to mind as she thought about it and quickly gave up. She could feel a headache coming on and didn't want to make it worse by trying to puzzle out something that just was beyond her current ability to understand.

Tchisa then nodded to the others who had accompanied Jenn, who merely dispersed to wherever it was that they slept. Or at least that's what Embris assumed they were doing. Especially since it wasn't like anyone around here had started brewing any booze or opened a place for everyone to socialize.

At least not just yet. It certainly was only a matter of time before that happened.

"So, now would probably be the best time to speak to Polelin," Tchisa said, startling Embris back to the present. "In the morning, he's probably going to be busy with what probably will be announced at the meeting."

"What's going to be announced?" Embris asked, unable to contain her curiosity.

Tchisa shook her head. "Sorry, unless the Blue Rose says I can share that information, I have to stay quiet about it. I gave my word to her."

Embris wanted to scream something at Tchisa. She wasn't sure what it would be, just that she knew she'd come up with something. However, she also recognized that it wouldn't be very helpful for her to do that, even if she just wanted to vent.

Instead, she took a deep breath and did her best to push the aggravation out of her mind. She knew it wouldn't help her out, even though a large part of her didn't want to let it go.

"Sure," she said, though her voice was a little strained, even to her ears. "Where would I find him at this time?"

Tchisa nodded, clearly ignoring Embris' tone. "He should be by the training grounds now. He seems to like to make a last check on the weapons before he goes to bed. Though, it usually takes him quite a while, so he should still be there if you hurry."

Embris nodded, not sure about all that Tchisa had said. She wasn't sure if she really needed all that information, but it hardly mattered. If she could get the request for help to write a letter made, she'd at least be happy. Even though she couldn't help but feel mixed emotions about actually learning to read and write herself.

She knew it'd be helpful, but at the same time, she knew she wouldn't be able to come back the same from that. Even though she really couldn't say how. Just that she'd be different.

Although, as she thought about it, she had a feeling that she'd probably be better to see if she could get Nymis and Rephis included in the lessons as well. She wasn't sure if they'd receive the same courtesy as her, but she had a feeling that it'd help them out just as much as it would her.

Plus, they likely wouldn't be as conflicted about learning this as she was. Or if they were, not for the same reasons, at least.

Or at least she hoped so.

So, she made her way over to the place primarily designated as a training ground for everyone. Few people cared to set up their tents here, but that wasn't something that really concerned Embris. Though, it did feel good to have fewer witnesses to this.

She wasn't sure why, but part of her felt rather embarrassed asking about this in the first place. As if it was something she should be either more ashamed of than she was or because its something that she should already know. Even though she couldn't give any reason why either side of that coin had any merit.

When she saw Polelin, checking the weapons, she couldn't tell if he'd just started or was just finishing, with how he was at a single end of where the weapons were stored. Not that it really mattered, since she wasn't there to try out any weapon herself.

Instead, she took a deep breath to settle her nerves and stepped forward. She wasn't sure what Polelin might say, but it wasn't like she'd learn what he would say if she just stayed there.

As she approached, Polelin looked up from the dagger he was polishing with a piece of cloth. "Is there something you need?" he asked, his tone as non-judgmental as always.

"Uh, I was told by Tchisa that you might be willing to help me write a letter to my sister," Embris said, though with each word she spoke, she felt more and more certain she'd made a mistake with saying anything about this.

"You should speak up," Polelin advised. "I'm getting older and my ears aren't working as well as they used to."

Embris wanted to laugh, but she was afraid that if she did so, she'd lose her nerve and hightail it out of there. So, she merely took a deep breath and said, a little more firmly than before, "I'd like you to help me write a letter to my sister."

As the last word left her mouth, Embris felt like the last bit of air had left her lungs as well. Leaving her gasping for air. She wasn't sure if that was good or not, but she knew she at least couldn't un-ring that bell.

Polelin didn't answer right away. Instead, he finished polishing the dagger, set it back in place among the weapons, then picked up a flail and started rubbing the cloth over that as well.

When he spoke, Embris nearly jumped out of her skin with how sudden it felt. "If you really want it written that badly, I can help," Polelin said, his eyes on the flail. "However, if you wait for your roommate to return, you could ask her as well. She might have more time to help than I would, even if neither of us know when she'll return from her latest assignment."

Embris felt like she could kick herself. Jenn had shown that she could read already, so why wouldn't she be able to write as well? Then there was how they were both rather friendly as well with each other.

Although, part of Embris wanted to reject the idea, since she worried what that could do to their friendship. Even though she knew it wasn't that big of an ask in the first place.

"Oh, and I almost forgot," Polelin quickly added. "I'm sure that by you asking me that, you can't read or write just yet. Am I right?"

Embris nodded. "Yeah, Tchisa said something about there being a class for that or something."

Polelin nodded. "Indeed. I assume you'll want to take part in that, right?"

Embris hesitated. She did, but worried what that choice might do to her. As all the fears that had disappeared a minute ago resurfaced and plagued her mind again, only this time they were more insistent and troubling for her.

"It's okay if you don't," Polelin said, apparently sensing Embris' turmoil. "Only, if you don't, that will limit your ability to advance in this company. Since you wouldn't be able to read messages sent to whatever squad or unit you get put with. Nor would you be able to send messages yourself, so your usefulness would be more limited than those who accept the need to learn that skill."

Embris sighed. The way Polelin put it, she really didn't have a choice in the matter. The only thing was that she wanted her siblings to join in the class as well. As if it was a skill that would help her out, she hoped that it would be one that would help them out as well with whatever occupation they might want for themselves as they got older.