The Forbidden Love

“C---Cara---”

“C---Cara---”

“C---Cara---” I repeatedly mentioned Cara’s name as I watched her face with my husband David. Both smiling and happy in the photograph taken as they hug. That’s why I can’t explain the nervousness I feel as I get here in David’s car. I don’t know what drove me this morning to clean my husband’s car. I noticed when we went to Plaridel, Bulacan that the inside of the car was very dirty. So! here I am.

How did they meet when I don't remember introducing them to each other?

Why does this have to happen when our family is strong well established?

How long have they deceived me?

I was so fooled because I didn’t think David could do it to me again.

Is this what all the puzzles that have formed in my mind mean but I just tried to dismiss them all before?

I feel my chest tighten as if my tears want to drip but they don't come out of my eyes.

I was trembling while slowly sitting on the floor. Shed in tears but my eyes were elusive.

It was just an accident that I saw a cellphone under the driver’s seat. I became curious that’s why I took it and checked until I found out that the screen wallpaper was their photograph together.

I had no idea that my husband had an extra cellphone that was used in adultery. This is the reason why David's awakening at three o'clock in the morning was also answered in my mind.

It’s not a client.

It’s a mistress.

“You are traitors. ”

“You both are like muddy pigs without self etiquette and shame.” Dictated by my mind. I don’t know how will feel. I feel so betrayed.

I couldn’t stand the tension that lived in my heart. There is only one step I want to take to calm my feeling. If I had endured David's deception of me then would it be that we had a child already.

“Hello---my love.”

“You woke up early and you didn't even touch me. ” David's eyes tease me. I smiled about sweetness. I didn’t reveal that my world was too heavy because I had already discovered his deception in having a love affair with the woman who carried David in the womb.

Ever since David was good at pretending and portraying. Who would have thought that he had an affair with Cara? Now, I just thought that maybe that's why Cara rejected me once when I told her that maybe she wanted to meet my husband. But I was shocked when she refused and said that she had a dinner date to go. And as far as I remembered that night, David also informed me that he had a client to meet.

“Hi, love---sorry. I just cleaned your car as it’s too messy. Next time, be careful just keep important personal things in your car.” I answered David while biting my lower lip. It was my intention to give a hint to David. I had no idea why I still keep my mouth silently. In fact, I feel that my blood is climbing on my scalp. I want to shout at David. I want to give him a strong punch with the chest but can’t do it right at the moment.

I feel like a bomb that will explode anytime.

But I preferred quiet and calm this time.

The day wasn’t past until I and David came to a private moment to discuss everything. I didn’t allow us to let us sleep that night without confrontation. Our son was sleeping already.

"Love, I thought I was numb when it comes to cheating but I'm still not." My smile widened as I spoke but my tone of voice was low.

“Love, what are you talking about? I thought we forgot the past, right?” said David holding my arm which I threw away.

“David, that’s what I thought. You’re right. We will forget the past pains and will start for another new chapter of our life. That’s why I couldn’t believe that you will repeat it over and over again. What---David?” I was obviously suppressing the trembling of my voice and body. I feel like I will fall to the floor any moment if I don’t sit down so I prefer to sit in the chair away from David.

“Love---I’m sorry but I don’t understand what you are saying.” David's appearance seems to pretend doesn’t know anything.

“David—please don't think I'll get hurt. Don't think I'll get angry. Don't think I will curse you. I just want you to tell me the truth. I will forgive you. Let's start again. No matter how many times you make a mistake. I will never be tired of forgiving and let’s start again. Even somebody says that I am a martyr wife, I don't care as long as what is much important to me is to keep our family stronger together. That's all, David. ” When I said that I was not aware of my tears has been started falling.

“David---please look into my eyes. Do you have an affair with another woman?” I asked David with my lips, mouth, and voice almost shaking.

“Dayan--- you are the only woman I have married so I will never be able to cheat on you. ” David's answer to me was so simple but the pain almost pierced my whole being. Why is it that the world is so unfair? David was captured already but still denying the truth.

I’m a huge fool. David was cheating on me like this.

I am a slave to anger and resentment. It hurts so much to think that it was so simple for David to cheat on me after my sacrifices and endurance in our relationship as a couple.

“David---please tell me the truth.” My voice seems to beg but David is still in a cold face. I feel like I was not existing in his life.

"Come on love--Then what will I admit is true if I am not committing any sin." I guess my husband's being a certified liar was intentional. He even beat the best actor in pretending in front of me. But not me, David. I seem to be running out of long patience with my beloved husband.

“Let’s go to sleep as we have to wake up early tomorrow. Of course, I want to make love with you tonight, my love.” David’s lip started teasing my back ears made me crazy honestly.

I closed my eyes with tears. A mixture of pleasure and resentment enslaved my feeling of those moments. As I savored the hot sensations that David was making me feel then. I couldn’t avoid seeing Cara's face that teasing, smiling with an insult to us. And that's what kept cold the fire burning between David and me.

I slipped out of David's arm. Then I dug into my pocket. I drew a deep sigh. Before I took the solid evidence that would prove David's guilt.

“If you do nothing wrong. How would you explain this picture? What does this mean? You're just playing cards so you're so sweet to each other.”

"David --- losing respect. Why does she? Don’t you know that is the woman who carried our child in the womb? How long have you been fooling me? The thickness of your face. I thought you had changed. David, we had our son already. Isn't our child reason enough for you to change your disposition in life?

“I don’t even know what to think. I don’t even know how to understand you anymore. I don’t even know where else you get the courage to do the things that will hurt my feelings.”

“I wish I had at least a little bit of pity and self-respect. I do everything to fill in for my shortcomings with you. But you never see that. You can't be content with what you have.” I was put down my head while my tears were overflowing.

I’m waiting for David to speak out his reason. But he just kept staring at me.

Is this a sign that David is already confessing his sin? Silence means yes!

“D---Dayan, I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“It's just a coincidence that I had something was looking for you which I didn’t see and I found it to Cara. I can't explain how I feel right now. But I'll admit to you it's not just lust I feel for her. I think I’m falling ---- " David cut his words where he looks seemed pitiful.

“W---What---David? That you’re falling in love with her. How dare you do this me?” I feel like heaven and earth have fallen on me with David's revelation. Where is the justice of happiness? If all I feel is pain and suffering. When will it all end?

I slapped David hard on the cheek. I will not allow my family to be destroyed. As much as I can I will fight for it. I want to regain my trampled dignity. I quietly wi

ped away my tears then turned my back on David.