The God Of My Understanding

"Hey, you doin alright?" Mika's concerned words didn't help me any. "I'm sure it was just a small thing he noticed. It probably doesn't mean anything. I need you to focus on this right now, okay?" I slowly nodded my head, clearly not all there still. Her worried gaze reluctantly moved to the rooftop's door. Reaching out, her hand grasped the knob and she gave it a gentle turn. As she did, something ran through my head that caused me to snap out of the trance I had been stuck in. I grew a small smile on my face.

"Hey, Mika. No matter who's right, I'm sorry I doubted you any." She stopped, turning to look at me as I said those words. For a moment, we're frozen in that moment. She eventually gave me a smile, and nodded her head. She turned back to the door and opened it wide, clearly ready for whatever the hell was waiting for us on the other side…which something was there, a very familiar something. Wearing his sweatshirt and sweatpants, God awkwardly rubbed his shoulder as we began our approach. Finally, he gave us both his full attention, cocking his head as he seemed to consider what to say. No…more than that, he looked like he was processing some kind of visceral emotions as nonchalantly as he could get away with.

"You both look displeased. Something the matter?" His words caused the air to turn icy. It was clear he had already read our suspicions right on our faces. His response was not inspiring any confidence in me being right. I looked over at Mika, who seemed frozen in thought herself. It was then that It really sunk in just how bad of a situation this was. If I said something wrong, would he kill me? Devour me? Send another one of those things to kill us without a chance to prepare? I breathed, and it came out staggered. Was I really gonna make it out of this alive?

"The reconstruction after the accident. What exactly did you do?" Mika asked with a gentle voice.

"I fixed the broken buildings? I don't see the issue here." God raised an eyebrow.

"What about the dead?" Mika asked another question, each sentences' end sending a jolt of panic through my body.

"I handled them properly." The vague answer, once again, drained my confidence. At that point, we were at a stun lock. Whether we wanted to admit it or not, there were too many unknown factors for us to try and catch him in anything. We didn't know the procedure for handling the dead after an accident, or how to handle the destruction of buildings. We didn't even know how to tell if he was lying or not. Still, something, some glimmer that could prove anything substantial.

Something clicked in my head.

"Ahh, that's good then." I took the lead without warning, leaving Mika surprised. After a moment though, she caught on, and remained silent. I walked up next to God, leaning against the fence. "It's good to know you like this now. It inspires more confidence, don't you think?" God seemed surprised by my words, but turned to lean on the fence just next to me.

"Well, I suppose so."

"Saying suppose isn't very godlike." He chuckles at my comment before taking a deep breath.

"Well, I suppose it's all in the title at the end of the day. The only one who can define what a God is must be God, or it loses all meaning."

"I understand what you mean." I let that topic die, before continuing on. "Hey Mika, how long has it been since we met up here?" The question hung in the air between us. I thought, as hard as I could, about the answer she had to give. I watched her face, mentally begging her to follow along. The moment felt like an eternity.

"Yeah. Like, almost three weeks ago. Stupid of me to hang out here and smoke a cig, I almost got caught before you came up here." I nodded along as she spoke, before turning to God.

No reaction. None at all.

Shit. If he gave an answer that would be one thing, but silence is too open to interpretation. I grit my teeth, hoping he wouldn't notice. I thought quickly, and decided to act a little riskier.

"Well, they were probably too busy cleaning up my dead professor. Poor guy got the pole of judgment. You remember that, God?" I addressed him directly, looking at him as calmly as I could. His gaze moved to meet mine, and I felt like my entire existence was hanging on the line. Come on, take the bait, take the bait. Mika seemed stressed, watching the man intently.

"Yeah, of course I do. Bastard really got what he deserved." His words lit a fire in my chest. We got him.

"If that's what you think." I turned to look down at the town, holding in any nervousness or giddiness. I had to get away before he caught on. "I'm gonna go try and get something to eat. Thanks for handling everything. I'm glad to have you to rely on." I said, smiling.

"Always, my friend." He smiled back.

Making our way to the rooftop's entrance, I felt my whole soul quivering. Oh god, I did it, it worked. I looked over at Mika who also seemed rather satisfied with the way things played out. As she reached out to open the door once more, I took a glance behind me.

He stared back, his cold gaze tearing straight through mine.

Oh. He knew we knew.

Oh fuck.