Unattainable Infatuation

Scholar Li Chun silently read her book while staying in the corner of the room, away from the hustle and bustle of the main protagonist group. With her glasses, she surveyed each and every sentence from the pages of the book, her will to read unbreakable by the noise. 

Soon, she managed to finish her book, and a small smile grazed her lips, though she retracted it fast enough for even her best friend not to notice. She then indifferently observed the quarrel of three pretty girls while surrounding a somewhat ordinary-looking guy.

Meek. Indecisive. Useless. These are just some of her comments about the main protagonist of the school-harem manga she's in now.

And she despises him so.

From the very first day she met that girl, she already had a label attached to her: the stern scholar best friend of the main protagonist's not blood-related younger sister. She can only be a background character who reads even in the midst of a storm.

Truthfully, she does not have any qualms about such a role. There are no death flags, she doesn't need to join the drama, and she can end well. She's practically the main support of the younger sister to snatch her beloved older brother from the girls in the harem. She also has the cheat of being a clever and smart character.

At first, she did not know that she became a manga character.

She died in her past world due to an accident in her workplace; the glass windows in their building was opened for repairs and there was no warning signages at all. She was quite a way from the opened glass windows, but she slipped towards the area, not even thinking that the windows are open. She thought that the windows would cushion her slip.

Well, she fell to her death from the eighth floor. The insurance the company placed for her as a key part of the management would surely be beneficial for her family. She loved her company, aside from the accident that caused her demise, so she hoped that no other victims would be produced.

When she was reborn as an infant, she was at first, dumbfounded. Then, with a flexible mindset, she adapted to the new environment. Let's forget about not drinking Meng Po Soup. There might have been some problems with the Underworld. Chances are that they'll come find her and drag her back for a redo but worrying about that kind of thing is not something she would do.

Her family is quite well-off, a bit different from her past life's family where she had to struggle everyday just to eat. She enjoyed their doting and love that she doesn't even need to act to be spoiled. Well, sometimes, she'll get embarrassed and return to her mature demeanor, making her parents think that she's a genius.

However, one day, they moved to a new house because of her dad's work, where she met the girl.

It was a cute girl with brown-haired twin braids, her height about the same as Li Chun's, standing shyly behind two adults and an older boy.

It was the day she first doubted her existence. And also, the time she felt something unexplainable appear above her, guiding her every move.

Is this really her second life? Or is she still alive, just full of tubes in a hospital ward somewhere?

Questions poured in the young mind of Li Chun as she tried to digest the information she suddenly gained.

There, in the heads of the family of four, glaring words floated, revealing the identities of the family members. In the head of the boy, a tag of 'Main Character: Lu Tong' appeared. In the heads of the adults, tags of 'Parent of Main Character' showed. While in the girl, 'Not blood-related Bro-con Younger Sister of the Main Character'.

Such things are obviously unreal, making Li Chun rub her eyes twice to confirm that she's not hallucinating. Her parents worried about her odd behavior, in which they asked her if she's okay.

She then found out that they're their new neighbors. There's this strange feeling that made her want to befriend and approach the girl.

To confirm her suspicions, she went and befriended the little girl, which she did easily. The girl is lonely; her brother spending more time with their other neighbor while their parents are away at work most of the time. She easily became a pillar of the girl's life.

Throughout the years, nothing special happened, making Li Chun conclude that she should just ignore the floating tags and live a normal life.

Alas, things just won't go according to plan.

As soon as they entered high school, pretty girls flocked to Tong-ge's side, fighting over him. There were also supernatural events of him accidentally entering the girl's locker area, or faceplanting in a pretty girl's chest.

In short, high school became that of a school-harem manga. It was disaster for her.

Lu Xue, Tong-ge's younger sister and Li Chun's best friend, also began to actively seek out the main character's affection, as if she were programmed to do so.

It was an interesting sight. Crazy things happen every day and no one thought that it was unnatural.

Li Chun observed the events with an indifferent eye, opting to view everything like an outsider.

If only that was that, she would have lived her life calmly like an observer.

But lately, she had been feeling something weird.

Lu Xue had always been complaining to Li Chun about the girls flocking around her dearest elder brother. And Li Chun is a good listener. She would listen attentively, giving her full attention to Lu Xue even while she's holding a book.

The well-known bookworm Li Chun holds her books aside to listen to her dearest best friend's ramblings.

She would have comforted Lu Xue, telling her to not mind those girls, because they're not the ones living with Tong-ge. She would have sided with Lu Xue while praising Tong-ge's good qualities as usual. She would have done that. Yes, as usual.

However, she suddenly had this burning feeling in her chest towards the famed Tong-ge. Li Chun did not manage to understand what this feeling is at first.

Maybe… love? Did she also become like those pretty girls that fight over the main character? But how should she face Lu Xue? Even if she accepts being a character in this obviously literary world, she can't possibly turn her back against her best friend.

This happened for a few days in a row, and her best friend even noticed just how quiet she would become when Lu Xue complains. Thus, the sensitive Lu Xue can only shift the topic towards their piled assignments, cursing their teachers for not being lenient.

It was only when she heard Lu Xue confess her love for Tong-ge that she realized what that feeling is, even if Tong-ge laughed it off and took it as love for family.

It was loathing. It was a burning hatred, jealousy and envy. She despises Tong-ge. She wishes for him to just disappear from her sight.

And… she wants Lu Xue to herself. To only look at her, to focus on her, to look at her the same way as she looks at Lu Xue.

But, how does she look at Lu Xue? She's her best friend for five years! Why would she suddenly view her best friend romantically?! How did she suddenly bend?!

It was as if a strange switch had been flipped inside Li Chun. She can't even recognize herself! Was she influenced by the plot?! If so, then why does she feel like she's fallen in love with her best friend?! Did she get the script of the hidden bent best friend of the bro-con younger sister?!

Just a few months ago, Li Chun would never have thought that she'd suddenly be hit in the head by the script. She would have been happily spending her new life while eating the melons of the main protagonist group! Why would she abruptly be pulled into the plot?

As the days passed by, Li Chun can faintly feel her sense of self fading away.

Wait. What sense of self? Wasn't she already like this long ago? She must have been reading books too much that she's confusing reality with fiction.

Strange. 'Li Chun' paused for a bit while looking at the school's bathroom mirror.

'She' feels like 'she' should be seeing something above 'her' head right now. But strangely, there's this blurry halo floating above 'her' head.

'Li Chun' tilted her head to the side, swiftly adjusted her eyeglasses, and finally, felt like there's nothing wrong. Humming in satisfaction, 'Li Chun' left the bathroom while holding 'her' cherished book.

Upon returning to their classroom, 'she' saw Lu Xue having a quarrel with Tong-ge's senior in a club. 'Li Chun' glanced faintly at Lu Xue's` pretty yet angry face and at the untrimmed long nails of Tong-ge's senior.

Tsk. The other one has dangerous weapons. Might as well knock them down later in an alley and disarm them silently to help out Lu Xue. Maybe 'she' might also 'accidentally injure' Tong-ge's senior in the process of disarming. 'She' can help even out the playing field for Lu Xue while eliminating a possible danger. It'll be like hitting two birds with one stone.

Every day, 'Li Chun's' life became a constant of diving in books, being the comforter and guardian of Lu Xue, and secretly sending away troublemakers to the hospital. It's as if 'her' world solely revolved around books and 'her' dreamed lover Lu Xue.

Even 'her' previous world became blurry memories until 'she' fully became the 'Li Chun' of this world, purely chasing after the sparks of love that will never be lit.

Such a passionate love will never win against the settings.

Seeing the increasing frown on her roommate's face as she went through the draft of her new story, Sophia smirked sadistically.

Soon, her roommate can't help but slam the pillow unto the bed in frustration.

"Arrgh! Why is this story like this?! Where's the romantic love story that you've been bragging about to me for weeks? This is a damned tragedy!" Bea complained, trying to contain her urge to bite the hateful smirk on Sophia's face. She glared at Sophia, trying to intimidate the sadistic author.

"Heh, it's a love story alright. There's Tong-ge having his little harem and the other side characters having their own lovers. They're all happy. Just let me write this one tragic hopeless romantic," Sophia reasoned, hiding her evil intentions in an innocent smile.

Right. It's really of the romance genre---not! Bea will believe Sophia's mouth only if she's dead. This author's mouth can't be trusted!

Remembering all those readers that the author pitted, Bea glared at her roommate once more.

"Then why would you set Lu Xue to be heads over heels for Lu Tong?! Just let her look back at Li Chun and give them a happy ending!" By the end of this sentence, Bea pretended to be coquettish, just to coax this sadist not to stretch her evil claws over the poor souls of the story.

"Nah. This is one thing I can't agree on. There must be at least one tragic soul in this story. And I chose this wanderer from another world be the scapegoat. 'Li Chun' will always get the affection of her family and the people around her except for Lu Xue's. She will never get this one love and will be the drive for her to exist in this world," Sophia even grinned maliciously, her hands forming claws as she flexed her fingers, ready to type out the rest of the story.

Looking at Sophia increasingly becoming manic, Bea silently lit a candle in her heart for Li Chun and sighed bitterly.

This roommate of hers is a brilliant award-winning author, famous for writing down adventurous and exciting novels. It had been a few weeks since Sophia buried her face in her laptop and bragged about writing a romance novel. Slightly expecting, Bea anticipated a story that can heal her heart after the torturous exams.

Who would have thought that Sophia would directly shove her face in tragic hell?

And… Sophia can be quite decisive in her decisions. Even the publishing company can't force Sophia to change her stories. Otherwise, Sophia would threaten to just be idle and not work. Sophia's not like other writers that depends on writing for living. She's a true blueblood who wants to experience life incognito. Bea's family had been working for Sophia's family for generations.

Poor little Li Chun. A little character like her can only be a marionette under the pen of a powerful writer like Sophia.

Unless this character can suddenly gain its own spirit and escape the confines of this 'world', which is impossible, Li Chun would always be like a dog in front of Lu Xue like how Lu Xue can only be a spare tire for Lu Tong.

Boundaries between worlds had been broken.

It was hinted under the mighty pen.

The stage had been set and actors had been casted.

Almost in grasps but would never be accessed.

This is truly… an unattainable infatuation.

~ Fin ~