ARMED ROBBERS

'Tolu, stop,' Maria shouted. 'I want to ease myself; I can't hold it anymore.'

God, I thought. She has no shame whatsoever. I bet she can tell one how her mother conceived her if one would care to listen.

Tolu slowed down the car. 

'Don't stop here,' Eric said. 'Get close to a settlement. This road is dangerous in the night.' 

Tolu accelerated the car. 'Maria, hold it for a minute.'

'I am a woman,' Maria protested. 'When it's time, it's time. Did you see me go to the ladies' since we left the house?'

'Keep going,' Eric barked. 'I would rather she wets the seat than be robbed on this road.'

Maria turned and faced Eric. I couldn't see her face, but I could imagine what lay under the stare. She turned her face to the windscreen, propping her thick thighs together.

I felt the car slowing down and I raised my head to look through the windscreen. I saw a flood of bulbs shining up ahead, lightening a settlement. Tolu decelerated some more and stopped a few meters away to the first building. 

Maria opened the door and step out, walking briskly to the back of the car. I came out of the car and walked toward the front of the car. Eric followed suit and we left Tolu and Mr. Potter in the car. Cars sped past, lighting up the road for seconds, and then returning us back into the semi-darkness.

I stopped a couple of steps away from the car. I backed the road, spread my legs, and relaxed the muscles around my bladder. I heard a movement beside me and I turned to see Eric doing what I was doing. We stayed this way for a couple of seconds, hearing the sound of our urine digging the ground.

'Tolu doesn't want to ease his bladder,' I said. 

Eric chuckled. 'He has not recovered from the close encounter we had with the police. Probably too scared to pee.' 

I zipped up. 'But he held up very well. He handled the policeman rather well, didn't he?'

'He didn't handle him,' Eric said. 'That witch did.'

I looked up at that moment and saw Maria getting up from where she had squatted. She stood for a moment and then walked back to the car.

'She was actually good,' I said. 'At first, I thought she had gone crazy.'

'I guess she had proved her worth to this gang,' Eric said. 'But I will be the last person to tell her that. Praise a woman and she will grow overconfident and want to control your life.'

We walked back to the car and got there in unison with Maria. We boarded the car and Tolu pulled the car out of the curb onto the expressway. 

'How long before we get there?' I asked Eric.

'Ten minutes, give or take. We will take a detour not far from here, but the road is not so good.'

I looked at Mr. Potter. 'Are you sure this man is okay? He sleeps like an infant.'

'Maybe he is tired,' Maria said. 'Or he was scared of flying and took Valium to help him sleep through it. People do that.'

'Why are you guys complaining about his sleeping?' Tolu asked. 'Has it not helped us? What if he was awake and asked where we are taking him to? What will you tell him?'

'He is right,' Maria said. 'But what happens if he wakes up and demands to know where he is? What do we do?'

Eric laughed and touched my side with the toy gun. 'This should scare him and keep him under control.'

'Okay,' I said.

We got to the detour. Tolu slowed the car, turned into a dusty road and the headlights revealed potholes spattered over the road. Dark tall trees lined the sides of the road and the crickets cried louder here. Tolu moved the car slowly, maneuvering around the potholes. The road lay lonely—like the way to the moon—and I felt an instant unease crawled all over me.

'I don't like this road,' Maria whispered. 'It's like the road to a witch's house.'

'You are right,' Eric countered. 'Who else will know the road to a witch's house apart from you?'

'Why did you have to pick this place?' Maria asked. 'I don't like it; it's spooky and it looks dangerous. There could be armed robbers or something.'

'Tolu,' Eric said. 'Let's go. The earlier we get there the sooner we return.'

Tolu nudged the car forward and we bumped into one pothole after another. The headlights pushed the darkness backward and a creaky sound followed us from the car's tires and somewhere in its belly. The sound of cars and trucks on the expressway was now an occasional dull hum from far away country. We got to a culvert and Tolu stopped the car. A massive hole in the middle of the culvert has cut it into two equal parts. Tolu moved the car to the left side of the road and edged it carefully forward, avoiding the opened middle. We missed the hole in the middle by a couple of inches and we had moved about a hundred meters from this hole before the headlights picked the gigantic log in the middle of the road. 

Tolu stopped the car again.

'Is that a log on the road?' Mr. Potter asked, startling me. 'Who will keep a log in the middle of the road?'

'It's trap,' Maria said. 'We can't move forward, and we can't go back with the hole in that culvert. We are trapped.'

Mr. Potter yawned. 'Where is this place?'

No one answered him, but at that moment, Tolu moved the car forward, moving slowly, going to the left side of the log. 

'Be careful,' Eric said. 'We don't want to fall into the gully.'

'I am careful,' Tolu retorted and pushed his hand out. He pulled and collapsed the mirror to the side of the car. Then he moved the car some inches forward.

'I can't get through,' Tolu said, 'It's too tight. I could brush the car.'

'Let's go back,' Maria said. 'We could be stuck—'

'Come out of the car right now!' 

'Come out of the car and lie on the ground! Do it now!'

'Armed Robbers!' Tolu cried. 'Armed robbers!'

'Oh, God, save us!' Maria cried. 'Save us please.'

The car zoomed forward, and I heard a metallic screech on the side doors. The car tilted and I gasped, waiting to feel the side of the car hitting the gutter and the glass on the window shattering on my face. We passed the log and the car tilted back and its tires found the ground.

'Stop!'

'Stop or I will shoot.'

Bang. Bang.

'There are shooting at us,' Tolu cried. 'They are shooting at—'

'Tolu, watch out,' Eric cried.

Tolu rammed on the brakes and the tires cried in protest. The car slid forward and headed to a tree standing about two meters away. Tolu swerved away and we missed the tree and the car returned to the middle of the road with an uncontrollable speed. It lurched toward the other edge of the road, the tires squealing again, and then it flew over the edge of the road and cannoned into a tree. My head stroke the back of Maria's seat and Talatu's face crossed my mind, and then everything turned black.