MADNESS

'What do you mean?' I asked.

Eric sprang up from the bed and walked to me, stretching out his hand. I did not stretch mine, but he grabbed my arm and shook my hand with vigor. 

'Dracula wants to partner with us,' he said, still shaking my hand. 'He wants us to come over tonight and take back the target and to take over the operation. I think they don't know how to get the money out of him.' He turned and looked at Maria, his happiness contagious. 'We are back in business, man! We are back. Hope is restored.'

We stared at him as if he wore a kilt for a trouser. 

'Why are they giving him back?' Maria asked at last. 'It's a trick! A trick to woo us into another trap.'

The smile on Eric's face ran away. 'It's not a trick. I think they are not able to get the money from him. Dracula did not say what the problem is, but I think they have hit a rock and are not able to collect the money from Mr. Potter's relatives. That's why they want to partner with us.'

'I don't believe it,' Maria said, shaking her head. 'What's there in collecting the ransom? How difficult can it be? It's a trick; I tell you it's a trick.'

Eric glared at Maria. 

'What exactly did he say?' I asked before Eric could speak. 'Did he talk about sharing the money?'

Eric turned to me. 'It's fifty-fifty; he wants us to come this evening.'

'It's a trick,' Maria said again. 'He wants to take us as hostages so they can make more money. Mark my words, Erico. It's a trick; I can feel it in my bones.'

'What would they kidnap us for when they would gain more by keeping with Mr. Potter away from us?' Eric asked, his voice gummed with impatience. 'Why would they risk arrest to contact us? They just want to partner with us since they can't do it themselves. It's-a-half-bread-is-better-than-none-situation.'

I didn't know what to think. My heart had picked up speed and a burst of warm excitement was spreading all over my body. I wasn't sure if I wanted Mr. Potter to be back or not; his coming back meant that the risks of kidnapping were back on our necks, but so was the potential of making huge money and going back to Talatu. It seemed my case with Talatu wasn't over yet; there is a chance to win her back.

'So what do we do?' I asked, directing the question more to myself than to Eric and Maria. 'Should we go ahead and meet them this evening?'

Eric sighed. 'Let's cool down and discuss this properly. Taking any decision in the heat of excitement is a bad decision. Give me a minute to take a shower; I am sweating like a pig.'

I looked at him, stunned. 'Let's discuss it now and take a decision—'

'In a moment,' Eric said hurriedly. 'Give me a few minutes to wash yesterday's sorrow away from my life. Five minutes, max.'

He pulled his shirt off, dropped it on the bed and pulled the towel from the door. He scuttled out of the room, whistling before he got into the bathroom. The old, ever excited Eric was back.

'Well,' Maria said, getting up from the settee. 'Maybe hope is not lost. Maybe I will still be going to Dubai and London after all.'

I looked and saw that she was torn between the excitement and the reality. 

'You are worried,' Maria said. She was staring at me from the bed. 'What is it? What are you afraid of?'

'I don't know,' I replied. 'I feel....I don't know. I feel something big is about to happen.'

'Something like what?'

I shrugged. 'I said, I don't know; it could be bad, it could be good. But I am not comfortable working together with Dracula's gang. Not under any circumstances.'

'So what are you saying? We should abort?'

'That's not what I am saying,' I said and cleaned the sweat on my face. 'Just that we should be careful with them. They are erratic and dangerous—especially that brute they call Joseph.'

'I don't trust them; they are killers.'

Eric returned with the towel covering his loins and found us pondering Maria's last statement. He stopped by the door and looked between Maria and I, and then walked to the bags on the floor. He bent forward and pulled out Vaseline on the side of one of the bags. He turned toward us, his eyes finding me.

'What's going on?' he asked. 'Don't tell me you want out?'

'Nobody wants out,' Maria said. 'Paul has a bad feeling about working with the gang. And so do I.'

Eric chuckled. 'Man! I have had bad feelings since I was a child and none of them was worth worrying about. Forget about feelings and face reality.' He screwed back the cover of the Vaseline and returned it to the side of the bag. 'Look. We have to take a risk—even if it's with Dracula and his gang. We either do that or remain in this rot till we die. No risk, no glory.'

'It's "no pain, no glory,"' I said.

Eric smiled. 'We are saying the same thing. But I agree we should be careful. I will also call Tolu to join us so we can have enough hands. We will claim back our target and make twenty five million in a couple of days. Our lives will change forever.'

'What do we use for transportation?' I asked. 'Tolu's car?'

'I don't know,' Eric replied. He picked up the singlet he had removed and dropped it over his head. 'We need a car, but we can't take a taxi. Hiring a car will be the best option—if we have the money. But I don't think Tolu will give us the car even after fixing it.'

'Where will you find the money to hire a car?' Maria asked. 'You are as broke as a gambler.'

'Paul,' Eric said and ignored Maria. 'We must retrieve the target today.' He bent over the bags again and pulled a jean out. 'This is a chance we can't play with—it might be our last.'

I nodded. 

Maria got up from the bed and walked to the bags behind Eric as he pulled the trouser over his legs. Maria removed a towel and kept it on the bed. Then she brought out a sponge case.

I stood up. 'I will get some air.'

'Pour some water,' Eric said, zipping up the jeans. 'See how you are sweating!'

'Later,' I said and walked toward the door.

Maria smiled at me. 'I will be done in twenty minutes.'

I nodded and walked out of the room leaving Eric pulling a shirt over his head. I stood a moment in front of the door, looking at the large, fenceless compound, taking deep breaths. Two yellow buses zoomed past, their speakers and passengers chanting a Wizkid's song I didn't know the title. 

I walked toward the beach, wishing Talatu was there with me. I wanted to call her but I heard the doctor's voice again in my head, warning me. Hot rage jabbed at my heart and spread to the rest of my body. If only I had the money, I know Talatu would forget him in a moment.

I reached the shore and the sea welcomed me with its waves lashing at my feet and ankles. My eyes travelled to the horizon, picking out two ships heading toward the Apapa or Tincan port. The sun stood behind them, large and round. 

'It's beautiful,' Eric said behind me and I turned to find him standing at hands akimbo. He smiled. 'Sorry to startle you. I thought you heard me coming.'

'No,' I replied. 'The waves...'

'Yeah,' Eric said. 'Are you okay? You seemed worried.'

I turned my eyes to the sun. 'Yeah.'

'Do you miss Jos?'

'In a way. But there is nothing to do there.' I turned to him. 'I'll be bored the next day after I go back.'

Eric nodded several times. 'Let's take a walk,' he said, and began to walk adjacent to the waves. I walked alongside. 'I have spoken to Tolu,' he said. 'I had to borrow her phone, as much as I hated it.'

'What did Tolu say?'

'He said the uncle almost sent him back to the village when he found out about the car. He won't be coming, that's for sure. We have to hire a car.'

'What's the plan?'

'We will pick the target and take him to the same cocoa factory. We will keep him there until we get the ransom. After that we can hint the police on where to find him.' 

'But how do we get there?' I asked. 'We don't have a car and we don't have the money to hire one. And it's getting late.'

'We will find a way,' he said, not looking at me. I heard the desperation and doubt in his voice. He had no clue on how to get a car, and without it the operation would fail.

The thought of stealing a car crossed my mind, but I discarded it. None of us knew how to do it and if we are caught, the twenty five million naira will go out of our reach.

'We should turn back,' Eric said. 'I don't want us to meet with the bad boys roaming the beach at night; they could mug us.'

I didn't argue with him. We made a U-turn and retraced our steps. The beach was darker, colder and the waves roared angrily. Except for the two of us, the beach was deserted.

Maria stood at the door when we got to the house.

'Where have you been?' she asked. 'Are you trying to sneak away without me?'

 Eric stopped and glared at her. 'Be careful,' he said and then walked passed her, going into the house. Maria followed him. I followed her.

'If you sneak away—'

I heard the smack before I heard Maria's scream. She staggered backward and bumped into me, forcing me to take a step out of the room. I held her arm, steadying her. Maria jerked her arm and rushed forward, her hand trying to find the space between his legs. Eric pulled his hips backward and his hand flew forward in a flash and connected with Maria's face. A sharp smack sound rose again and Maria reeled backward. I stretched my hands to hold her but she hit the floor like a bag of potato before I could reach her.

I bent to pull her up, but she jumped up with the agility of a cat. Her hands jabbed forward, her nails clawing the space between her and Eric's face.

'You have to kill me today,' she screamed. 'Kill me or I kill you.'

Eric turned in a circle, avoiding her jabs and clawing, and I quickly stepped in-between them. I pushed Eric away. 'Eric,' I said. 'What is wrong with you?'

I raised my hand and blocked Maria. 

'You bastard!' she screamed. 'You rogue; a good for nothing; you stay in a room and claim it's a house. Shame on you.' She panted. 'Jobless as a slug; Erico, the slug! That's who you are. Erico, the slug. '

I turned to Eric. 'Eric, let her be.'

Eric glared at her and his breath came out in interrupted gush of warm air. I pushed him toward the settee.

'You will pay for slapping me,' Maria screamed. 'You will pay. I will never forgive you. Jobless fool.'

'Maria!' I shouted. 'Stop it right now!'

'Didn't you see what he did to me? Am I his wife? Even if I am his wife, should he slap me?'

Eric hissed. 'You? My wife? I rather die.'

Maria shot her hand forward, pointing at him. 'Who wants to marry you? You are jobless and cannot take care of a wife. What will you feed her with—sausages? Your mates are buying Range Rovers and BMWs for their wives. Look at you; you can't afford a bicycle. '

'Eric,' I said holding his arms. 'Just leave her alone. She is a woman for goodness sake.'

'This one is not a woman,' he retorted. 'She is a witch. Not a common one—a stone cold witch. I pity the man who will marry you.'

Maria clapped her hands together. 'You are a wizard! Did you hear me? You are a jobless wizard. Shame on you for hitting a woman; shame on you.'

'I didn't hit a woman,' Eric retorted. 'I hit a witch! There is a difference.'

'You are a wizard!' Maria retorted. 'You are a jobless wizard who cannot take care of a woman. All you know is how to abort a baby!'

I pushed Eric to the settee, but his eyes trailed Maria.

'Guys, we are losing focus,' I said. 'Let's keep our attention on what we want to achieve tonight.' I turned to Maria. 'We just took a stroll on the beach; that's all. We weren't trying to leave without you.'

'He should have told me,' she cried. 'He's trying to trick me out of the plan. Well, that won't happen. I will follow you wherever you go from now, whether you like it or not.' She stormed to the mattress like an angry rhino and dropped on it. 'And I will go to the police if you try to stop me from going with you. No one will cheat me out of my portion.'

Eric chuckled. 'You are paranoid; that's your problem.'

'Maria, no one is trying to leave you behind,' I said. 'See, we are back, aren't we? No one wants to cheat you out of your portion.'

'Why are you talking to her?' Eric said. 'Just let her keep hallucinating; she seems to enjoy it. Just...just let her be.' He hissed. 'I'm figuring out how to a get a car to use for the operation and this nutcase is asking where I have been. Unbelievable!'

'Eric, forget it,' I said. I hated my position as the pacifier, but I was in no mood to go through another tirade that could last the whole night. 'Let it go—.' 

 My phone rang then, cutting me off. I looked at the screen and then I stretched the phone to Eric. 'I think it's for you.'

He collected it with a question on his face. 'Who is it?'

'Tolu,' I said.

He took the phone to his ear. 'Tolu, what's up?'

He listened for a while. Maria's eyes left her phone and stared at Eric. 

'That's great,' Eric said. 'When is he coming back?'

He listened some more. 

'Okay,' Eric said. 'Get ready and meet us. We will take the Epe road so we can get there on time. We will be ready by the time you get here.' 

More listening.

'That's fine,' Eric replied. 'But come before 8. We have to be there on time. I don't want to miss the guys. It will be—' 

He listened.

'Okay then. See you soon.'

He pulled the phone from his ear.

'Well?' Maria asked.

Eric glared at her for several seconds before he turned to me. 'Tolu is bringing another car. He's at the airport; his uncle just boarded a plane to London. He wants us to use the uncle's car tonight before he gets to London. So we have less than six hours before he calls the guard in the house to find out if Tolu had gotten home.'

'That's great,' Maria enthused, getting up. 'Let's get ready.'

Eric turned to her. '"That's great; let's get ready." She has forgotten how she nagged me a minute ago.'

Maria stopped dead in her track and the smile died away. 'And you have forgotten how you slapped me as if I was your wife.'

Eric laughed. 'I will rather turn into a donkey than have you as a wife.'

'I am sorry for the woman who will marry you,' Maria retorted. 'Because you are already a donkey—'

'Who are you calling a donkey?' Eric shouted, getting up. 'Who are you calling an ass? Do you want another slap?'

I felt the weight of exhaustion descended over me and I turned and walked out of the room. I strode away from the house while their voices followed me like two white trails following a plane in the sky. 

Let them kill themselves, I thought. I don't care what they do to each other anymore.

I stayed out on the beach until Tolu came to pick us. We found Eric and Maria sitting apart in the room, but alive. 

Sometimes, I guess, you have to fight madness with madness.