58. It is really the end?

I silently looked at Walter, waiting for him to say he was kidding or announce the hidden cameras because surely he was pulling a prank, how could he show up in front of me and tell me he missed me if he knew he was getting married?

"Uhm, w-what did you just say?", I asked in disbelief, 'He must be kidding', I thought.

He got up from the bed to wrap his waist with the lodge's white towel, then made his way to the balcony, lit a cigarette, but his expression loudly screamed 'agitated. He paced around the balcony as if looking for the right things to say to me.

I watched him as he anxiously moved up and down, and it immediately registered that he was serious, I got off the bed to put on my clothes, it was becoming clear that I had been fighting a losing war from the beginning. I was with him for 8 months and we couldn't even officiate our relationship and in three months he managed to score himself a bride. I felt like a fool for even reading too much into his actions the previous day, it was obvious that I was his bachelor gift. To think that I was ready to be with him, I was ready for Khalinda and her shenanigans, I was ready to fight for him and with him, but a fiancé?! That was something I never saw coming, never in a million years would I have thought that. 

I took a deep breath in acceptance of my fate and defeat, 'I and he were never meant to be in the first place, so why drag it?', I thought as put on my clothes, "So when is the wedding?", I asked calmly.

He stopped pacing to put out the cigarette in his hand, "You are leaving??", he asked anxiously as he made his way back inside the room,

I gasped at his audacity to ask me that question, "You are not serious... what makes you think I would stay?", I headed towards the bathroom to at least clean my face, and I was relieved to receive a notification from Sandra informing me that she will be arriving in 15 minutes, 'Let me hold it together until I am out of his sight', I thought.

Walter sat on the bed, with a pitiful expression, which I found surprising for a person who was getting married, he bent over to rest his head on his hands, "Uhm? Thandie...it is not the kind of wedding you think it is...it is-"

Ignoring what he was saying, I carried on with my line of questioning, "So, when is the wedding? is it someone I know? You must truly love her to be making such a great commitment...". As much as my heart was breaking, I must say, I did a pretty good job of keeping a calm and indifferent demeanor,

"Thandie, it is not like that, I-"

I refused to listen to his explanation, I was not ready for anything that would sway my heart because that meant being his mistress, and at that point, I would've yielded. With another heavy sigh, "Clearly you don't want to tell me. So I am guessing you didn't come all the way here to give me the invite, I must have been your own private bachelor party then. The last thing on your list before you get hitched, or maybe you didn't like the way I ended things and this was your perfect revenge. Congratulations! Goal ach-", he rushed to grab my shoulders, "Don't say that baby, please don't-"

I shook him off, "Don't call me that, you should reserve that for the love of your life", 

But he pulled me back into his chest, "You were not my last mission. I came here to see you before the wedding because I just wanted to see your face, one last time. I wondered about you, how you were doing? if you were happy? My cousin spoke about Silverton being your hometown but I didn't think I would actually get to see you when I showed up. However, there you were, walking into the same restaurant I was at. Initially, I thought I'd be content with just seeing you, but then when I saw you on a date, I realized I couldn't stomach it and just seeing you from afar was not enough. I found myself wanting to talk to you, to touch you and to hug you, so after the bathroom encounter, I thought that was it, I could let you go, I mean I know I had to let you go, however, seeing you sleeping in the car, how could I? I became selfish and greedy Thandie, because the plan was to leave before you woke up, but-"

In order to snap my heart from being hypnotized by his words, I abruptly pulled out of his arms, "So...in all of that, you forgot you were engaged! And does your fiancé even know you go on dates when she's not around??"

Seeing that there was no getting to me, he sighed and backed away. I could tell that he had given up on trying to explain himself because he went on to put on his clothes, and accompanied by another heavy sigh, he said, "At least let me help you sort out your car issues, and make sure you get home. You are in this mess because of me."

His face made it clear that he didn't want to talk about it anymore, although I had a lot of questions and I felt like there was more he wanted to talk about, my pride could not allow it. My heart ached even more seeing him getting dressed in a depressed state, "You know what, this is not the first time I have been in a mess because of you, don't worry yourself about it, I texted Sandra last night and she's on her way."

He looked at me again, and without any doubt in his voice, he assured me, "Thandie, I really really like you..."

However, his words were like knives in my heart and felt like mockery, if he liked me, why wasn't he trying to work things out with me instead of committing to someone else? "Yeah, and yet you are marrying someone else, so obviously it doesn't mean anything."

His face became even more gloomy, and with despair laced in his voice, he tried to explain again, "It is not like that, and if it didn't mean anything, I wouldn't be her-"

But I didn't let him finish, "Not that again. Let's not do this again. Anyway...goodbye Walter, it was nice seeing you.".

 My heart was heavy enough as it was, the build-up of emotions was like a volcano waiting to explode, and I refused to let him see that, so upon saying that, I walked out of the room and as if sensing the state of emotional urgency I was in, Sandra arrived on time and we arranged for a tow truck to take the car home.

After that day I never saw Walter for another three months, even after I went back to Amber City, it was like he was never in the office. I never asked my Manager about it and she never mentioned his name in front of me. He indeed got married two weeks after leaving Silverton, and his wedding was all over social media, it turns out he married a very famous social media influencer, but their love story was not clear, not that I cared enough to ask anyway. I would occasionally think about him and stalk his socials, but the heartbreak was bearable this time. Although it was slow progress, I was finally learning to live with the scars from our relationship, however, as they say, the devil creeps in on you when you are at your highest, because on one faithful night, while I was reminiscing and stalking him on Instagram, I got a DM,

"Hi Thandie, I am outside your place"