40. Are you avoiding me?

 The smirks on their faces as they gave me the tasks really put a dent on my confidence. As much as Rachel's post started everything, it didn't force people to behave in such a bullying manner. Besides, it has been a few days now and people had already moved on to the hot new scandal about a big celebrity caught with drugs, yet, my workshop colleagues were still giving me disapproving looks.

The following two days I was living on coffee and very minimum sleep. In addition to the report, I was told to prepare a presentation of my review to present on a similar day, you could tell by the puffiness on my face and the eye bags that sleep and I have been estranged. On the second last day of the workshop, which also happened to the presentation day, my nerves were shooting up, I could not tell whether it was the overdose of caffeine and lack of sleep or I was just generally anxious. I decided to take a short bathroom break and also try to calm my nerves, my stomach had also started turning, my palms were sweaty, my heart was beating at 120, and my whole body was trembling. The presentation that would make or break my career was starting in 15 minutes and I needed to hurry and get ahold of myself. I started to feel nauseated so I rushed to kneel on one of the toilet cubicles, since I was not getting any better, I silently sat in there for a minute or two that's when I heard two of the female delegates walking in laughing and talking. That moment gave me deja vu, but I was too shaky to even stand up. 

"Yeah, who does she think she is? just because she is close with the Sekulus she thought she could get out of it scot-free, Jennifer is not here to save her.", one lady said with envy

"Yeah..why didn't she call Jennifer?", the second lady asked

"Maybe Jenifer abandoned her...think about it, she is like a sinking ship", they giggled and just left, it sounded like they were only there to fix their makeup.

Although their words cut deep, I was grateful to them, they reminded me that the main objective of this presentation was to save our reputation, not to prove a point. My manager put her trust in me because she believed in me, and I almost let some petty individuals ruin it all. Upon that realization, I could feel the tightness in my chest and stomach loosen up, and the trembling slowed down. As I was getting up, my phone dinged and I saw a few texts offering me words of support.

Sandra: "Go get them!"

My manager: "Do your best!"

Shirley: "Walter told me about your presentation, those jerks! Show them how you got the job"

While the others sent me words of encouragement, Walter sent me the most unusual cryptic text, "Let's have supper together".

In my efforts to avoid talking to him, I decided to take an early leave from work and I booked a flight directly from Cape Town to Silverton, it was almost time for the holidays anyway, and my manager approved my leave almost immediately. I only spoke to Walter through texting, and I always had an excuse for not picking up, I was still conflicted with this thing that happened between him and Rachel, and I have not come up with a way to bring it up to him, so his sudden request had me in a tight spot or maybe it was a wrong text because I would have known if he was in Cape Town. Thanks to my presentation, I had no time to dwell on that, I needed to put on my game face.

I powdered my puffy face, fixed my white blouse, and checked if my black pants were tucked in well. I was too tired to wear heels so I paired my formal clothes with a pair of white platform sneakers.

I looked at the person in the mirror one more time,

"You got this! and after this, you can sleep all you want!"

The moment I stepped onto the podium, the room unanimously went quiet, the chattering and the waves of laughter that once filled the room suddenly vanished, and all eyes were on me now. I could see some faces pitying me, while other people were just grinning. I took a deep breath and started my presentation. My voice was shaky at the beginning but I soon found my flow and I was cruizing through the presentation, I felt liberated, a smile soon found its way to my face, and my confidence levels shot up. At that moment I felt at my best. The faces of my audience lit up, some with pride, some with total astonishment and I scored a couple of nodding gestures. People could finally see my full potential, and fortunate for me, that was not going to end in that conference room because Khalinda happened to be passing by on that day and she took a video of my presentation and sent it to my manager who then shared it with Walter, somewhere along the line, the video ended up being posted with the caption:

"Who said she slept her way into the company, It looks like talent to me" and the person who posted it was none other than the organizer of the workshop himself. 

By the time I finished for the day, it was already evening, my exhaustion build-up was at its maximum, and my body felt like it was close to shutting down, I politely said my goodbyes and went back to the hotel. The moment I stepped into the room, my whole body felt sluggish so I crawled into bed to close my eyes. My phone dinged again, and I lazily opened my eyes to see a text from Sandra congratulating me on my presentation, in my hazy sleepy state, I also saw a text from Walter, but I was no longer in control of my body, I just let go and went straight into deep sleep...the best sleep I have had in days!

The next morning, I opened my eyes to a brown leather suitcase by the door, I felt a panic in my heart,

"Who the hell is here?? Did they double-book the room??", I slowly got up to assess the room and I saw that the glass door to the balcony was open. The wind from the ocean kept violently blowing the curtains in and out, and at that moment I saw a man in a white vest and black shorts taking a phone call, I had not yet seen his face, but one thing was for sure; no man was supposed to be in my room. My flight-or-fight mode kicked in, I took the bottle of wine I got from Walter and tiptoed to the balcony, I was about to attack when the man suddenly turned around, and ta-da! there he was! Walter himself.

"Good, you are awake??", he said casually as if nothing peculiar was happening at that moment.

"What are you doing here?...wait, how did you get in? Does the hotel staff just let anyone walk into people's rooms without notifying the owner?", I was shocked by Walter's sudden appearance, I planned to avoid him until I could make sense of Rachel. Seeing him in person threw me off balance, and the only way I could react was through panicking, plus the hotel policy really worried me. In my frightened state, I went straight for the phone, "Isn't this a premium room?! what about my privacy? what if you were some stranger...you know what let me report th-", Walter grabbed my hand with disappointment covering his whole face. For sure that was not the reaction he expected from a girl he liked and had not seen in a while, "Thandie, what's going on? Are you avoiding me?"