Chapter 12: My Wolf Form

My wolf form eats up distances faster than a bike, this is because I am now a luna, and being a luna comes with certain perks.

Which, I have never been more thankful for.

I keep my pace, sticking close to the trees lining the street, while following the pull of my mate Elias, just like walking by faith alone.

I don't know where I am going, but I know exactly what direction I am headed.

I can feel him, his distance would be far had I been in my human form, but since I am in my wolf form, eating up distances like a lumberjack eats up pancakes, I should be there within 20 minutes.

The tingle going through my every nerve is enough to make my hair rise in excitement.

This sensation is a blend of the euphoria I feel when I go wolf, and the rush in my blood when I am near him.

Both of which sets me ablaze.

Especially since I haven't been in my wolf form for almost two weeks now.

A result of the constant planning leading up to my wedding with Darius, and the commotion that almost took my life, and then...the memory.

I shake my head, I don't want to think about that for now, I just want to be here, in the moment, feeling this excitement and soaking up the cool night's air, that turned from biting into my skin, to brushing softly against my fur.

My wolf form always gave me this feeling, I love being in this skin more than I do my human one, every time I transformed, everything always seemed to fade into nothingness.

All my worries, all my pain, all my heartache, all of it, would be nothing more than a scratch on my ankles.

I remember when I was 6, the first time I could transform, I hated it because it hurt like hell.

But as time went on, I found myself in my wolf form more often, to the degree that I would go wolf four times a month.

It may not seem like much, but on average, besides being a fighter for one's pack, it was too much.

So much so that I would occasionally raise Mom's concern, but after reassuring her I wasn't going feral, she made her peace with it, and let me be.

But, after that horrible day, I found myself going wolf almost every night.

Both of which find roots in my wanting to forget that day, and also in me trying to punish myself, by going through the pain of transforming.

After some time, I somewhat got used to the pain, and it stopped working as a means of punishment.

As a result of that, my routine went back to four times a month, and with that, I also somewhat, healed from my wounds.

That is, up until now.

The thought of them, the thought of it all, burns into me, like iron growing red and bright as it is exposed to fire.

The anger consumes me.

Why did they have to die? Why did I have to lose them?

*CRASH*

I ram head-first into someone's car, leaving a huge dent, and an alarm buzzing and going crazy.

I at once shake myself and make myself scarce.

I can't be angry, I have to stop being angry, being angry in a wolf form is the worst thing any wolf can do.

I try to clear my head and think of something, something to quail my growing anger.

I try to think of something, anything, but what I end back to, is the talk me and Rosemary had three days ago.

And all of a sudden, I find myself reliving that moment.

"You want to know the truth?" She asks me, while getting off the bed and turning towards me. "How do you plan on doing this?"

Her question catches me off guard, I don't know.

But.

"E..."

"Neuropath." She cuts me short.

"What did you just say?"

"Do it." She says, pointing her gaze to the door.

I don't question, and do as she asks.

'Can you hear me?'

She gitters, and tries to keep herself calm.

'Please don't tell me you want to meet your mate. Elias, was it?' She closes her eyes as she speaks, probably trying to power through the ache.

'He's the only...'

'Have you lost your mind? For all you know, he could have been involved, what if you're next?'

'My mate would never hurt me.' I say, staring straight into her eyes.

She breaks eye contact and starts to pace, or at least she tries to, but the ache in her head only leaves her a hopping kangaroo more than anything.

'I won't let you do this.'

'Well, you can't stop me.' I rise off the bed, aiming to exit the room.

But she grabs me.

'Abigail, you have to let this go.'

I stare into her eyes, hoping she will see the hurt and confusion in mine.

'How can you say that?' I push her hands away. 'Do you know what that incident cost me?'

'Of course I do, how can you even ask that?' She says wincing.

'I'm asking because even after knowing, you still won't help me, why?'

'Because I don't want you dead Abigail. If Elias really won't harm you, who's to say Darius won't?'

'I don't care. My mother and brother were murdered for some reason that was far beyond bitterness and rivalry, I have to know what the reason was that they had to die. And if I have to, then I will make whomever did this to them pay.'

'Abigail.'

'It was my fault Rosemary!' I burst, regretting it a second later when Rosemary winces in pain.

I cool my jets, but with that outburst, I suddenly feel tears forming at the edges of my eyes.