Chapter 444: Hungry Rhino

Ten minutes? Twenty minutes? Ares wasn't sure how long he'd been lying face down in the couch now. Not that the duration really mattered, his embarrassment was still sky high and didn't look like it was going to disappear any time in the near future... Oh well, at least the fellahin had left. He'd heard them shifting away through the sands and Sandy probably told them Ares was still asleep or something which was why they didn't bother him on their way back to their base. At least with nobody around he didn't have to wallow in shame anymore and hide in the couch!

Kathunk

Hm? Ares couldn't help but look over to the door of the Elliot as he heard it open, wondering who on earth was trying to sneak into his vehicle. To his surprise, it was Sandy again! "If you're here to mock me about what I said last night I'll seriously cry you know?" Ares turned his face around to bury it on the backrest and hide his slightly reddened cheeks. This was too much! This was the first time he'd been shy in the presence of a love interest! It was supposed to be the other way around but he just had to go and open his big mouth last night and doom himself to be the prey this time around.

"Not that I'm not interested in bullying you a little, and seeing you shed some tears, but no, that's not why I'm here. Or what? Don't you want to see me now that you've stolen a kiss? Hmph. Shameless, irresponsible brute. You kept talking about minding the prophecy and avoiding risks and boundaries and then you go and do that? Now that I've calmed my head a little I'm tempted to take revenge and kiss you right back and then some. Luckily for you I'm patient so I won't be too demanding. That being said I'm owed your company, at least. I know, I know, you don't want me to fight the stepper with you. Fine. I won't. But I am gonna follow you round for a bit. It's not like I've got anything else to do. The elders relented on keeping me in my position, the hunters need some time to rest before they go out again, and if I was going to hunt western monsters anyway then I can just do that with you or in my spare time when I'm bored... This is the freest I've been in a long time and I'm spending it doing what I want, crashing in your temporary pad. I'm also curious to see what kind of nonsense you get up to on a day to day basis because you've been in this country for barely even a week and you're already embroiled in a country-ending disaster as well as an ancient stepper murderer plot. You live a whacky life and I want to see it. Although knowing my luck nothing interesting will happen from here on out. Still, I'm mainly here to be along for the ride and spend time with you so anything else is a bonus." Sandy shrugged, walked past Ares, and sat down near the back of the Elliot at a table. She leaned back on a chair and rested her legs on top of the table as though she were lounging about in her own house and Ares, who'd looked up and spied on her actions, was left dumbfounded.

"... Mi casa es tu casa, I guess... I mean, I know your name is Redhome and whatnot but I didn't expect you to get territorial this quickly..." Ares rolled off the couch and took a seat on the floor in the lotus position as he commanded the Elliot to automatically drive back to Xasca city. "You're always welcome so, uh, enjoy the ride I guess? I'm gonna be cultivating for most of the day, though, to try and go up a stage before the fight so I won't be able to entertain you. As long as I'm not in enlightenment you can bother me whenever if you really want, though... Oh and don't worry about food, I'll make you some later... Heh, now that I think about it, you don't know how good a cook I am! This is my chance to show off a bit."

"Cook? Interesting..." Sandy, despite outwardly remaining calm, was pretty floored that Ares was suggesting he would finally be 'showing off' only now as he'd done more than enough of that when he threw out an Armillary before. If that wasn't 'showing off' in comparison to his cooking abilities then maybe he was actually extremely talented? Sandy was a woman who loved good food, like REALLY loved good food, and, when she was free and in the city, she would often run around to visit as many stalls as possible to pick up a bunch of stuff to chow on. She'd store it all in her spatial ring, run back to the base, hole up in her room, and spend an hour or two just enjoying the various dishes one by one to her heart's content. Of course that was provided she didn't give in to her greedy urges and gobble everything up in an alley somewhere in the city after removing her headgear temporarily. Again, her appearance was deceiving. Her appearance may have been a beautiful, slender, and graceful one but not only was she a rhino but she was more than capable of eating mountains of food without exerting hardly any effort whatsoever, treating mass consumption like a walk in the park.

Nobody would be able to guess it, based on Sandy's appearance right now, but Bala had to really dig into her savings for many years when taking care of Sandy to make sure she was fed properly and wasn't left with a rumbling tummy as a kid. Plus any pocket money Sandy was given went straight into buying even more food too so she was definitely someone who could appreciate a good cook like what Ares was claiming to be. One of the perks of her position in the clan, of which there weren't many, was that she was pretty rich nowadays and could buy massive amounts of food whenever she wanted as well as visit all kinds of restaurants every single day. Indulging in such luxuries was part of what kept her sane with the same dull old routine every single day for years. If Ares wasn't all bluster, and could muster a respectable dish on demand, then he was a perfect fit for this rhino gourmand! Sandy was already pleased with who Ares was but this too? Ah, life is being good to me. Is this what it feels like cashing in a karmic check? Sandy gently rocked her head side to side and hummed the rhythm of a popular fellahin folksong to herself while Ares got down to business and started cultivating and cooking in the Blade.

A little while later, after arriving outside the city gates, the Elliot parked itself in the shade and Ares stopped cultivating for a while to start bringing out the scrumptious feast he'd cooked up. He could tell Sandy was interested in food based on her reaction earlier, even if she tried to hide it, so he went all out and cooked up a delectable banquet of varying delicacies. She liked food and liked travelling but didn't get to do much of the latter so Ares figured he would help her experience all sorts of worldly dishes she might not have had a chance to taste after spending most of her life stuck in this country. It had been a while since Ares went all out with his cooking but he enjoyed doing it and so Sandy was in for a real professionally crafted treat that only those in Ares' inner circle could ever experience. Sure Ares might not be the best at any individual type of dish but he was at the point that his mastery was close to those he'd leeched off and he was, without a doubt, the only one who could do it all. He wasn't a better sandwich maker than Fixer, nor was he better at making noodles than Scratch, but he was better at making sandwiches than Scratch and better at making noodles than Fixer! The only chef who was overall better than Ares, that he knew of currently, was Remmy, the little prodigy elf who was easily spoked by loud noises. Even then it was somewhat close as Ares had been experimenting a lot lately in his Blade and only further enhanced his craft. Travelling to the Federation and Xasca had broadened his horizons a fair bit, even if he wasn't stunned senseless by heavenly tasting dishes left and right, as there were plenty of lessons to digest and absorb like a sponge from even mediocre quality food. There was that one restaurant on the Federation that served curried fish near immaculately-made but Ares had arguably learnt more from all the so-so stalls here in Xasca. Figuring out where these sellers were going wrong, and how best to improve upon their dishes and flavours that Ares was previously unfamiliar with, was like a puzzle that expanded his knowledge base every time he interfaced with them. Granted if Remmy also went on a long trip she would have a similar experience and leave Ares in the dust again but what could he do? The little elf was extraordinarily talented and could easily make a name for herself as a divine chef one day. Ares couldn't be the best at everything and managing to be second, despite his focus being directed elsewhere, was still an otherworldly feat. Maybe one day he'd spend more time squaring off against Remmy but for now cooking was dwarfed in terms of priority when compared to cultivating. Ares wasn't going to take time off to cook when his current goal was saving the world... Although he'd be lying if he said he didn't sprinkle in a little bit of the hobby here and there for the fun of it!

Ares was mulling over such things as he took the finished dishes out of his Blade and started placing them in front of Sandy who's eyes were glued to the myriad starters, sides, mains, drinks and deserts. There wasn't enough space to put all the dishes because just the one table wouldn't be able to accommodate Ares going overboard like this in a bid to leave a lasting impression. Ares was going to have to use windowsills, shelves, and even the couch to place plates on and Sandy could just roam around the Elliot and take whatever struck her fancy at her own discretion. Ares could see her eyes widen with each additional dish he summoned out of his Blade and her reaction was pretty sweet. More than anything, Ares appreciated a foodie companion so he was feeling pretty great right now as the look on her face was priceless. He'd gone to a lot of effort to 'show off', just as he stated he would earlier, and it seemed like Sandy was thoroughly wowed. She was nearly drooling and couldn't wait to get her hands on it all so he chuckled and told her to dig in. Ares wasn't feeling too hungry himself, though, so he might not eat much and, even then, he wanted to finish cultivating something he was stuck on first. He'd taken a break after hitting a small wall but he felt confident he could overcome it if given another ten or twenty minutes and maybe then he'd enjoy the leftovers of whatever Sandy didn't gobble up. After all, there was a metric ton of food here and there was no way in hell she could eat it all.

...

She's already eaten it all!? Ares couldn't believe his eyes! The sight before him was so outrageous and unbelievable he had to use Omniscience to make sure he wasn't witnessing an illusion! What manner of bottomless stomach chicanery was this!? He'd served up the last dish about two minutes ago and taken up a seat to start cultivating. Shortly after he figured he would check to see if Sandy was enjoying herself and, well, she certainly was! Her cheeks were chubby like that of a squirrel's as she feasted on the last remnants of the banquet, a barbeque wing that had endured the slaughter well up until this point, but there was no more food left anywhere else in the Elliot other than in her grasp! In a mere two minutes she bulldozed through, what was it? Twenty five dishes? About that many? She hadn't even left any for him! Granted Ares wasn't particularly fussed, and this was always the greatest compliment a chef could receive... But he wanted some! He'd really put in a lot of effort to please Sandy, making some real high quality stuff in the process, and he wanted to at least eat some of his own hard labour! The barbeque sauce he put on the wings was something he'd been inventing for weeks now and he didn't even get a drop of the stuff on his tongue before it vanished into the bottomless void that was Sandy's stomach! Homeless, penniless beggars got better treatment than this! Ares could only whine to himself in his head because this outcome was probably for the best. He couldn't deny he was happy seeing Sandy take a real liking to his food, it felt good and there was no two ways about that. Hell Sandy might be more appreciative of Ares' cooking than both Enyo and Bellona put together, not including their respective favourites of course. Seeing Sandy content and rubbing her stomach was soothing for Ares so he smiled, shook his head, and closed his eyes to go back to cultivating with renewed vigor. He didn't need to ask if she enjoyed it because the proof was in the pudding!... That he also didn't get to eat... The pudding was long gone unfortunately, swallowed up by Sandy in the blink of an eye... It put up a brave fight but there was only so much that could be done against the powers that be; namely a starving rhino.

As for Ares' cultivation, he was making good progress on the roadblock he'd stumbled across earlier. It wasn't a major stoppage or anything, he was just of being muddle brained and had brought this all upon himself due to biting off more than he could chew. There were a couple of different avenues he was treading down simultaneously in his mind, regarding exploring the depths of his knowledge about destruction, but they were all getting intertwined because of this decision and so he had to untangle the knots he made before he could move on. This approach, travelling all the paths at once, was quicker in the long run but occasionally led to situations like this wherein he was juggling ten different important pieces of information and had to connect the dots properly otherwise he would just be hassling himself endlessly, unsure of how it all fit together and having to retread his steps. Thankfully he was on the right track and things ought to be fine now that he took a short break to clear his mind...

But Ares could sense movement!

What was the rhino up to now? Aers opened one eye and found out that Sandy had moved a tiny bit closer to him form the back of the caravan. She was now sitting on a different chair in front of a small desk and aimlessly spinning around on it... Ares went back to cultivating and ignored this... For about five minutes until he felt Sandy approaching him yet again... He opened his eyes and this time she was sitting on the floor and cultivating herself. Well at least this way she'll stay put for a while... Ares thought to himself before returning to his blockage. He was very nearly done with unwrapping everything and that would serve as a gateway to going up a stage. There was still more to be done after, and this could be considered groundwork that would serve as a precursor to greatness, but he felt like reaching the next stage before the confrontation later was all but guaranteed at the rate he was going... And yet he had to stop again because, after another quick burst of movement, there was currently a rhino seated on the couch behind him breathing down the back of his neck... There were monsters in this world that only moved when nobody was looking at them and Sandy was doing a very good job impersonating them right about now! What on earth did she want?! Was she bored already?! She'd only been following Ares for half a day so far! If she could at least wait until Ares was done with the stepper issue he'd play around with her all she wanted! Ares sighed and opened his eyes but, as he looked up and back at Sandy, he quickly realised she wasn't bored... She was salivating... She wanted snacks! She crept over here to beg for treats like some kind of sly pet! She didn't have an 'appreciation' for food, that was the understatement of the century, she had an obsession!

"You..." Ares didn't exactly know what to say here so he just gave up and offered her exactly what she wanted. "I'll make you another banquet if you wait another half an hour and let me cultivate in peace for a while..." Sandy gave a vigorous head nod with a joyous smile and Ares got to work in the background in his Blade while he went back to cultivating. He finally managed to untie the aforementioned information knot, and get started on his understanding of various intricacies regarding his pillar, but he was definitely distracted by the fact that Sandy was staring at the back of his head while she waited for more food to pop out of him! Honestly she was probably more attracted to him because of the fact that he could cook than for any other reason right now... Ares did his best to ignore outside interferences and, thirty minutes later, he took out dishes one by one and handed them directly to Sandy as he promised he would.

Ares kept his eyes open and trained on Sandy this time to see exactly how fast she hoovered everything into her gullet and Ares was big time impressed when he got to observe her unmatched energy. Her appetite was one thing but her ability to actually devour food was truly astronomical! The speed! The aggression! Soups were slurped, meat was mashed, and everything was eaten in record pace! Ares couldn't help but be curious as to whether the word 'savour' existed in this woman's lexicon or if she was always like this regardless of what she ate and who made it. Ares gave her the benefit of the doubt and assumed she just really liked his cooking and couldn't control herself. It was an egotistical assumption but Ares was a damn good cook and was way better than anything or anyone he'd seen through his walks in the city at least. It was a very real possibility Ares was the best chef around for miles, maybe even the best in the country currently, and Sandy hadn't had anything remotely as good as what he'd served up for a log while now.

Gulp

Sandy swallowed the last of the food and looked well fed and truly satisfied this time as she pat her slightly enlarged tummy while letting out a long sigh. She licked her lips, looked down at Ares with a neutral facial expression, and plainly but bluntly asked, "Wanna have sex?"

...

That was all it took?! A few clams here and there and suddenly she was offering up her own!? Ares had heard of food for thought before but never food for thot... The way to Sandy's heart was through her stomach, definitely. Was she going to get horny every time Ares fed her? At that point, she'd be just as active as Enyo... And she was pretty damn casual about this too! It was the first time such a topic had ever come up and she wasn't even remotely shy or bashful about it. Good for her but also... "Uh, no? I know I kissed you earlier but I think that's far enough for now? Though if you want more food I don't mind making it. I have plenty of ingredients and I'm always more than happy to cook for family and friends."

"Wanna get married?"

This woman was too easy! Ares knew how to make Enyo and Bellona turn into putty in his hands but he had seriously worked hard to understand what made them tick and, yet, this... This was ridiculous! In comparison, Sandy was an open book! She wasn't even drunk like yesterday, when she was acting like a wino rhino, and yet she was making such bold offerings... Ares had to be careful with this one. If he ever got her drunk during dinner she might actually just pounce on him then and there... Ares settled Sandy down by giving her some breadsticks, and being firm with her about his stance on intimate relations not happening for now, before returning to his cultivation. Ares could probably get permission from Enyo to play around with Sandy if he sent her a letter and explained everything but he didn't want to. He was capable of ignoring his 'lower brain' and doing what was right! It had nothing to do with the prophecy at this point, there was just an order for these sorts of things. Ares would feel terrible if he skipped over his first time with Bellona and allowed Sandy to jump the queue... That is, of course, if anything was ever even going to happen between them. Who knows? Maybe Enyo wouldn't permit this relationship... Although that was unlikely, knowing her. Honestly, Ares had no clue what was going to happen which also played a big role in his reluctance for allowing things to go any further right now. He was enjoying his time with Sandy an her company was enough for now to be satisfied with. She was a good friend and would make his journey for the next few days more entertaining at least. Plus she was cute whenever there was food involved so that recharged Ares' batteries and gave him the motivation to work hard. Seeing her nibble happily on the breadsticks, like a beaver chewing on wood, gave him the power needed to tackle the stepper later on and that good mood boost was not trivial! His breakthrough was close at hand, night was drawing ever nearer, and it was finally time to gather information on the scavengers and kick some stepper ass!