Heart to Heart

"Didi? It's your sister," Xinhua called as she knocked on the dark wooden door. She heard frantic steps approach the door. It swung open and she soon had an armful of her sweet little brother. She wrapped her arms around him and smiled at such a warm welcome. "I heard about what happened, I'm glad you are alright."

"How did you know I was here?" Xueye leaned back but didn't let go. It had been some time since He'd last seen her and he wanted to keep her close.

"Lady Guangming let me know," Xinhua gestured to Yazhu, "This is her most trusted handmaiden Lady Li Yazhu, she guided me here."

"A pleasure to finally meet you, Young Master Meigui," Yazhu bowed. "Unfortunately my lady is quite busy today since something urgent came up. She regrets she couldn't visit you just yet but if she finishes her business before day's end she will come visit."

"That's alright," Xueye smiled. "Please tell her she needn't rush. I understand."

"I will," Yazhu nodded. "She also wanted me to tell you Shujing might also be longer than expected."

"That's why she sent me to look after you," Xinhua said, gently patting his head. "A lovely excuse to spend time with my darling didi."

"Oh…" Xueye smiled but Xinhua didn't miss the briefest moment of disappointment that flashed across his face. One she'd often seen from Shizhe whenever Xinhua had to leave. However quickly his delight over having his sister around made it quickly fade. "Well, I'm quite happy to see you again, jiejie! It's not very often we get to spend so much time together."

"We have plenty to catch up on," Xinhua started urging him inside. "Thank you, Lady Li, best not keep your lady waiting."

"Yes, take care," Yazhu smiled with a bow before she ventured off to her next task.

Xinhua glanced around the sitting room that the entryway flowed into. Everything was neat and orderly, not a thing seemed out of place, even for being new to this place. Even without Yazhu having mentioned it, she could tell Shizhe had a touch in the aesthetic of the place, even if it was a little more subdued. It very much reminded her of the more formal sitting room Shizhe entertained more official guests in her home, the main difference was the color scheme. 

She noted there wasn't much of a personal touch. No family paintings, nothing that looked like an heirloom. Everything seemed newer and barely lived in aside from the tea and the paperwork stacked neatly on the table, clearly from Xueye.

"Let's see, I believe this is also a spare room," Xueye drifted down the hallway and opened the door next to his. It looked very similar to the one he was staying in but the pastels were warmer in color. 

"How cozy," Xinhua smiled as she set her little rucksack on the bed. She immediately left it there and returned to Xueye's side. "Did you just wake up? You look a bit of a mess." Xinhua started smoothing out his messy bangs.

"Ah, sort of," Xueye felt a little embarrassed to be in such a state, not having been expecting guests. "More like a slow morning. I was a little restless last night."

"Really? Are you sleeping okay?" Xinhua was quick to worry. She knew his tendencies to have nightmares. He'd rarely talked about it but she knew.

"Well it's been a little hit and miss since I was attacked," Xueye spoke honestly. He never felt the need to hide much from Xinhua. She would pry until she got an answer she was satisfied with anyways. "I'd gotten a bit of medicine from Dr. Jingji. It worked initially but even after taking it last night I just couldn't rest well. Maybe Shizhe was right and I should have had her keep me company. Seems it's better I didn't though since it seems something important came up."

"I'm here now," Xinhua smiled sweetly. "Now let me do your hair like we used to and you can tell me more about this benefactor you are staying with."

"Certainly!" Xueye beamed. He brought her over to his room and handed her his comb, sitting on his bed together.

"Shizhe told me his name is Shujing, is that right?" Xinhua set about gently unraveling the messy braid and running her fingers though the heavier tangles first. "Just how did you meet him?" While she knew a bit from Shizhe she really wanted to hear the way Xueye spoke of him. 

"So you haven't met him? He was an informant for father," Xueye was a little surprised she didn't at least know of him. "Father was busy one day and sent me to meet with him instead. Shujing expressed his dislike for father so he started helping me with a little investment."

"Ah, is that what the caravan was being so secretive about?" Xinhua giggled. She had escorted them back having been able to finish her job thanks to the attempted ambush on them.

"Oh, they're back?" Xueye felt his heart beat excitedly.

"Yes, I was able to follow them back to the palace. They said it was their first stop but didn't want me to come with them the rest of their route without your permission."

"Would you be willing to accompany me to get work done?" Xueye asked. 

"Tomorrow," Xinhua said firmly.

"Jiejie!" Xueye whined.

"It can wait, you should take it easy while you can, they sounded like they will be busy for a while today," Xinhua stated with a light, playful tug on his hair. 

"Fine," Xueye pouted.

"So, how long has Shujing worked for father before? I'm wondering if it was after our switch," Xinhua felt like she knew their father's secret contacts rather well but it was the first time she ever heard of Shujing. 

"I actually don't think I ever asked," Xueye blinked absentmindedly. "It's quite possible."

"What's he like?" Xinhua asked in a bit of a teasing, sing-song voice.

"He's very sweet," Xueye sighed contentedly. "He's been so generous and keeps pushing me to do or get things I want. He always teases me, but it's never malicious. Honestly not that unlike Jinse's." Xueye giggled. "Staying here, he's done nothing but take care of me. There's something about him, I just feel so comfortable when he's around."

Xinhua could feel the warmth in his voice as he spoke. It was so heart melting to hear him speak so happily. She couldn't recall the last time he sounded this delighted when talking about anything. It was all the more reason she wanted to be sure he was clear of any suspicions. If this man turned out to have wicked intentions and break Xueye's heart, she knew it would destroy him the longer it went on and it was revealed he wasn't trustworthy.

"You are quite fond of this one," Xinhua said with a smirk. She still couldn't resist teasing her brother over it a little.

"I…! Well…Erm, yeah, maybe a little," Xueye tripped over his own words as he fiddled with the hem of his sleeves. He was glad his back was to her as she continued to comb his hair so she couldn't see how his cheeks were changing color as heat rose beneath them. "W-why wouldn't I? We've become good friends after all…"

"If you say so," Xinhua chuckled.

"What else would it be?" Xueye asked with a huff at her teasing tone.

"You tell me," Xinhua hummed.

"Nothing else to it," Xueye said with a hint of a pout. 

"Do you want there to be something else?" Xinhua was curious. Shizhe made it seem like Shujing was genuinely interested in Xueye so she was curious if it was the same for him. 

"I… I don't know…" Xueye huffed. He wasn't about to admit that was half of what kept him up last night. Being left alone with his thoughts he was stuck thinking about Shujing in his absence. Other than missing his presence, he was left to continue to ponder Shujing's recent actions and what he meant by saying, "My Treasure…" Xueye couldn't help but sigh thinking how pathetically he was lying awake at night overthinking over Shujing. He did come to one conclusion, "I just don't want to lose him, you know?"

"I get it," Xinhua smiled. She desperately hoped Shujing really was someone Xueye could truly rely on. Shizhe vouched for him and it should be enough, but Xinhua was just paranoid given how many people wronged her beloved brother. Ties to their father was the main thing she was cautious about. Her unease would settle once she knew for certain. Even so, she was so delighted to see Xueye had people he felt he could trust outside of her and Jinse. "I'm glad you are making more friends." She wrapped her arms around him from behind. "You deserve this happiness."

"Thank you," Xueye couldn't help but smile in her comforting embrace. He relaxed in that familiar warmth. "I have felt a lot more at ease as of late, despite all that's going on."

"Very good!" Xinhua beamed. "Though, I have to admit, I thought you were infatuated with Jinse." Xinhua couldn't help but tease. She knew how hopelessly in love Jinse was with Xueye. Years of working together to protect him made it quite obvious. She understood that Jinse almost always having a few lovers had always given Xueye a different impression.

"What's with the sudden interest in my love life, hmm? What about yours?" Xueye deflected. Jinse was also on his mind last night, it was hard not to think about how Jinse was acting yesterday. 

"If you must know, Shizhe let a little confession slip," Xinhua giggled at the thought of how adorable she was. "She didn't mean to but I made sure she knew I felt the same."

"Really?!" Xueye turned around to face her. His expression was sparkling with such excitement and delight. "You two finally admitted it?!"

"Yes," Xinhua couldn't help but let out a soft laugh at the little puppy dog look on Xueye's face that said he clearly wanted to know more. "I could tell for a long time that she'd been interested in me in that way. I wanted her to come into it on her own terms, given how nervous she always seemed about it. Unfortunately a little confession was all we had time for today. Once things settle down she and I will talk more about it. "

"I'm happy for you two," Xueye giggled. "You have talked about her so much in our letters, I suspected it for a while. She and I talked a bit about her feelings for you as well. I'm rooting for you two."

"Thank you," Xinhua felt so warm seeing him in such a good mood. "So don't keep yourself from finding love too. Whoever it's with."

"Ah, please, Xinhua," Xueye whined. "Even if I could bring myself to fall in love, I doubt that father would let it slide. He'd probably throw a fit if it wasn't some respectable noble woman."

"Don't let him dictate that! Mother wanted us to marry the one we fall for." Xinhua took his hands and squeezed them. "She forbade him from arranging marriages for us because she didn't want us to end up like her."

"She's not around anymore… Who would stop him?" Xueye's expression grew dour. 

"I would, our didi, certainly Jinse and Shizhe wouldn't let it slide. I don't know much about Shujing but I suspect he wouldn't either," Xinhua said with a bit of ferocity. "Now stop looking for excuses not to fall in love and let it happen for once."

"I'm just… afraid…" Xueye's voice had a faint tremble to it. "Last time I did… well you know how that ended."

"And I'll never forgive that wretched woman," Xinhua said bitterly. She let out a sigh trying to calm herself. "Look, not everyone will be like that. I don't doubt you'll find someone who can't live without you. Just give it a chance, okay? If they break your heart, I'll break their legs."

"Xinhua!" Xueye couldn't help but laugh despite trying to chastise her. He let out a sigh, "I don't know if I can, but I will try. I just don't know if I'm assuming things about either of them."

"Then ask," Xinhua flashed a comforting smile. 

"Shizhe said the same thing, at least about Shujing," Xueye sighed rather defeatedly. "I hadn't even brought up anything about Jinse with her, but she saw how he acted yesterday. He was more clingy than usual and just the way he reacted to some things I said. He even kissed my hand!"

"Hmm?" Xinhua tilted her head, curious to hear more but more importantly she wanted to know one thing, "If you knew with absolute certainty they both loved you, who would you choose?"

"Jiejie, must you ask such questions?" Xueye's cheeks flushed deeply.

"It's something you need to consider," Xinhua chuckled. "I can tell you care about them both a great deal. You wouldn't be losing your mind over them if you didn't."

"I don't know what to do…" Xueye looked rather defeated. "They do both mean a lot to me… I'd hate to break their heart. I know I could never string them both along, they don't deserve that. But like I said, I don't want to lose them. I'd rather carry on as we have than to lose either of them…"

"I understand," Xinhua closed her eyes. "I was like that with Shizhe for a while too, until I realized she felt the same. I wanted to wait, if she didn't tell me before some business I have to take care of, I planned on telling her after."

"Business?" Xueye tilted his head curiously. 

"It's a secret," Xinhua placed a finger over her lips. She didn't want Xueye to know about her plans for their father's downfall. If he knew he'd try to talk her out of it.

"Come on, I'm spilling my heart out to you and you are holding out on me?" Xueye pouted. 

"I'll tell you once it's taken care of," Xinhua sighed. "I don't want to put you in danger over knowing about it."

"So it is dangerous… I was wondering…" Xueye held her hand a bit tighter out of worry. 

"I'll be fine, I promise," Xinhua squeezed his hand reassuringly. "You know I'm more than capable."

"I know but I still can't help but worry," Xueye huffed. 

"I won't tell you not to but if it makes you feel better I have Shizhe's help now. I wasn't going to ask for her help but she found out and insisted." Xinhua said begrudgingly. "She'll just be supporting me though, I refuse to have her put in danger over this."

"That is a little reassuring. I'm sure her predictions will be of help to you," Xueye's shoulders visibly relaxed a bit. 

"Quite so," XInhua nodded. "Now then back to the topic at hand. I want to hear more about Shujing and your time with Jinse yesterday."

"Xinhua, won't you leave me with some secrets?" Xueye whined, already knowing her answer.

"Nope, I'm your jiejie and I will use my seniority to pry into it if I have to," XInhua smirked.

"Fine…" Xueye sighed but he still couldn't help but feel happy, sitting around and telling her everything was relieving. Without their mother around, Xinhua became the one person he could tell anything to and not worry about the consequences. They just rarely had the chance to speak at length as of late. Once he started, it came easy despite often being resistant at first. This time was no different.