Zamsii

ZAMSII 

I heard the door slam not too long ago. I've been hiding in my room ever since the run-in with Alejandro, trying to slow my heartbeat. The worst bit is that underneath all that fear I'm trying to hide…there's something else. Something darker that wanted him to squeeze, that wanted that anger I could see controlling him.

That wanted to see just how far I could push him…and how far he would take it.

I'm fucked up.

Pushing off the door, I stagger into the bathroom, ripping off my clothes. I didn't shower earlier. I had fallen back asleep, but with the feel of Alejandro's hand still wrapped around my throat, and the smell of sweat and man coating me, I need to.

I need to wash it away, the way I felt in that moment. I wasn't scared to die, I wasn't even scared it would hurt…I was scared I would never know how it felt to feel all that power.

To get revenge.

Fuck.

Slipping into the shower, I scrub my body, ignoring my traitorous pussy, who seems way too interested in these snakes. Once I'm done, I feel slightly better, and after drying off, I find my way back into the wardrobe and slip into an old, holey, AC/DC t-shirt. One of my favourites, my comfort shirt. Then I curl up in the perfect bed. Sylvester was right, they made the room so it looks like my tantrum never happened. Though I poked the mirror in the bathroom and realised it was coated so as not to shatter.

Smart man.

I want to hide in here forever, but that's not my style. I still want to be free of these men, and to do that, I need knowledge. Knowledge is power. No one else is coming to help me, and the world doesn't give a shit. It doesn't care if I'm a good person or a bad person. Fuck, I'm not even sure which I am anymore…maybe somewhere in the middle.

So, on bare feet, I slip out into the apartment, pressing my back to the wall where they can't see me as I eavesdrop. "You think he'll be okay?" Jake drawls, his voice distinctive with the warmth he infuses in it.

"Yes, he just needed to get it all out," Sylvester replies, his tone cold.

There's a sigh and some shifting. "Do you ever wonder if it wouldn't have been kinder…"

"Stop right there," Sylvester snaps. "He's our brother, his demons are our demons. He survived, we do whatever it takes to ensure that he stays that way."

"You're right," Jake agrees, but sounds sad. "I just wish there was something we could do. I feel useless watching him struggle."

This is his battle, not even we can help him this time. Only he can, he must decide to keep going. He's been in limbo ever since it happened, just living. I have a feeling that having Zamsii here will shake that up. Force him to face it once and for all," Sylvester murmurs.

"Y-You knew that when you brought her here, didn't you?" Jake snaps, angry now. "You might be smart, Sylvester, but sometimes you're a fucking bastard. He's our brother."

"He is!" Sylvester growls. "I'm trying to save him!"

"You are trying to control everything, like always!" Jake yells. "For once, stop trying to be in charge, just be there for him. That's all he needs, not your fucking experiments. We aren't another one of your challenges to conquer, we are your family. I swear, Sylvester, sometimes you remind me of—"

It goes quiet, and I can almost feel the drop in temperature, and when Sylvester's voice comes, it's deadly, dark, and oh so cold. "Say it."

"Of Dad!" Jake finishes. "You do, I love you, brother, but you get more like him every day. I've spent my life fighting to not be like him, but sometimes I wonder if you don't think it's just easier to give in. Remember what happened to him, brother, don't end up like him."

Peeking around the corner, I see Jake disappearing upstairs. Sylvester is standing in the kitchen, his head hanging as he presses his fists to the worktop there. "One, two, three, four," he murmurs. "One, two, three, four."

He repeats it again and again, until I see his body calming, once more hiding behind that ice. When he pushes away from the worktop, he straightens, once again in control. His face is cold as he buttons up his suit and heads out the front door.

I try to dart after him, to escape, but a hand clamps over my mouth and I freeze, my eyes going wide as my heart slams and my breathing picks up. A mouth meets my ear, the smell of smoke and petrol wafting to me.