Chapter 22: Gone

 The doctors gave them some space to collect themselves together.

"Did you know?"

"No," her dad answered in his raspy voice.

Sitting on the floor outside of the morgue, both father and daughter stared long ahead. They still could not believe that Ana was gone.

Nothing seemed to bring them back to reality. They wished it was just a dream.

After completing the paperwork, Alice accompanied Anna to the mourning hall. They waited for their other family members there. Since they could not afford anything for now, they decided to cremate Ana's body.

Alice's classmates also came to pay their respects and give her some encouragement. Sadly, none of those words registered in her brain.

"I'm sorry for your loss."

"Be strong, Alice."

"Hey, be strong," Yingying said. Although she found her capability annoying, it wasn't enough for her to knock someone when they're down.

At least her elite education forbade her to do that. All of her gang did the same. They were neither warm nor cold that day.

She only sat there, quietly, while Momo held her hand to give her strength.

Her dad was nowhere to be found. Alice tried to look for him a few times in the beginning before giving up. She couldn't do anything right now, no, she didn't have the strength to do so.

After the cremation ceremony, Alice rejected Momo's company any longer as she had spent her time on her all this while. With a bitter smile, she told Momo she'd be fine and made her way home.

She stopped at the park near her home. She would never have expected that one day she would return to an empty, quiet home.

She would like to deny the truth for as long as she could. Memories flashed through her mind.

"Your mother is the strongest patient I've ever seen. She didn't blink when she first knew she had cancer. She even refused the treatment almost immediately. She told us that her husband is quite useless and her daughter worked too much to cover the household expenses. You did enough, don't blame yourself. It's your mother's choice to refuse treatment. You know, you can even think of it as her final service as a mom for you."

Those words kept replaying in her mind. The words of Dr. Tang when she bumped into her at the hospital's washroom. Since then, it was the only thing she could hear.

Alice held her head with both of her hands and brought it to her knees. She was basically curled up on the park bench. Her stomach was crying from being empty for several days now.

She ignored her body's pleas and kept sinking with her feelings. It hurt so bad, physically and mentally. It was the first time she crumbled.

Rain started falling.

Drop by drop, it fell, hitting the fragile Alice. Left with no other choice, Alice made her way back home.

Alice opened the door, and immediately she was greeted with the familiar musky smell. She began feeling teary.

No more harsh, hurtful words getting hurled at her. The house was especially gloomy and quiet, other than the sound of rain.

His dad had been missing for several days now. She didn't even know what to do. She had called several places he frequented, but her effort was futile.

Her body ached, and her head was hurting like crazy. Yet, the first place she went inside the house was her parents' bed.

She lay down on her mother's side. Her smell was still there. She felt a little comforted by her smell.

How sick mom must have felt. All alone, knowing that she could drop dead at any time.