"Don't deny it. You want it." Killian said to me, stroking the nape of my neck with his thumb. His face is so close to mine and I forgot to breathe. I gasped when he pushed my dress higher, revealing my thighs to him and let his hands rest between my thighs. 

I tilted my head to the side to avoid his lustful gaze, penetrating deep into my soul. 

"Your body craves it." He said, firing kisses down my neck till his lips touched my hard, naked nipples. That sent shivers down my spine. My body erupted with goosebumps and I exhaled sharply. I want to speak, but I can't. He has that much effect on me. His tongue played with my nipples and I mewled. That felt so good. 

"You want me as much as I want you." He whispered with his lips pressed on my skin. I shouldn't be doing this. I know I should stay away from this man but how can I when he invades my thoughts daily? When he's the only one my body wants. It's frustrating because no matter how hard I try, I can't say no to him. And I am this close to making the worst mistake of my life. I swallowed, trying to fathom the words out.His fingers brushed my core and I jerked forward, pressing my body on his. 

"I don't want you." 

"You're lying." He said, playing with the strap of my thong with a lazy finger. My eyes rolled back in my socket with pleasure. I am lying but he's making it so hard.

"We shouldn't be doing this, Killian." Killian? Do I really have the right to call him that? 

"Give me one reason why and I won't touch you."

"Because you're my best friend's Fiance."

SEX WITH MY BEST FRIEND'S FIANCÉ

 It’s getting addicting. Being with her is getting addicting. And that kind of addiction is also very terrifying. The kind of terror I will die for. The kind of terror I yearn for even though I know it’ll be the death of me, because what’s the point of being alive if I don’t enjoy the perks of living? 


 Hazel makes me think about a lot of things I was okay with before and question them now. Is she changing me? That, I don’t know. 


 I find myself wanting to protect her at the cost of others and I can’t tell if it’s a good thing or not yet I enjoy doing it. I haven’t done much to keep her safe recently and just that bleeds my heart. 


 I hate that I wasn’t there for her and I hate that I made her bear all that burden alone. I hate that I can’t make Asami go away as well as the little compassion I feel towards her. I hate a lot of things of recent. 


CHAPTER 170