Chapter 62 Being the First Disciple of the Human Religion Is Really Hard to Do
Chapter 62 Being the First Disciple of the Human Religion Is Really Hard to Do
"Ah, being on duty in the Heavenly Court is really tough."
Inside the Palace of the Matchmaker, a slender old man dressed in a bright red robe sat on his circular chair, sipping tea brought by the attendants, wiping the sweat from his forehead.
Just now, he had just dealt with a heavenly general who insisted on asking him to arrange a meeting with a fairy from the Yaochi.
Could he just arrange a meeting like that?
Even though he was the Matchmaker, he couldn't tamper with others' destinies so casually.
Although there were indeed many shady ways to do it, it also depended on who the person being paired up was!
The Matchmaker had also put in a lot of effort to deceive that heavenly general, sweating profusely from the exertion.
To refuse without displeasing the other party, while also not offending the party being sought after...
Being the Matchmaker was truly a difficult job.
Most marriages formed naturally, while a small portion were heaven-sent.
As the Matchmaker, he did have some authority to make changes, but those golden scissors and red strings were treasures of heavenly virtue, and could not be trifled with!
Even for a mundane marriage, if handled poorly, it could not only damage the hard-earned merits of oneself, but also incur punishment from the earnest and diligent Jade Emperor...
What were self-formed marriages?
In the rear hall, there was a nearly endless mystical space, filled with countless small clay figurines. Whenever living beings in the heavens, earth, or human realm needed to be married, they would have corresponding small clay figures here.
Marriage, the foundation of etiquette and principles.
When the corresponding living beings interacted in the mortal world, the clay figures would draw closer to each other, and then their red strings of fate would intertwine, forming a marriage.
Over time, feelings would grow, and the red strings would sway gently, slowly entwining with each other; love at first sight would cause the red strings to entangle with a light touch.
Occasionally, a clay figure would drift in the wrong direction, and its red string would wrap around someone else's, leading to extramarital affairs...
What were heaven-sent marriages?
When a living being was born, a clay figure would resonate here, entwining with the red string of their destined partner. This was a heaven-sent marriage.
In addition to this, there were also some "carefree" clay figures that would break free from their red strings and fly around with half of the string.
When they occasionally encountered another clay figure in the same situation, they would entwine their red strings, sparking love, or they would break the red string, signifying a brief encounter.
The request from the heavenly general just now was actually not difficult for the Matchmaker to fulfill.
He just needed to tie the red string of the heavenly general directly to that of the fairy. This would count as forming a marriage, and generally there wouldn't be any backlash of karma.
But the Matchmaker had to consider the background of the fairy from Yaochi.
Hundreds of years ago, Queen Mother had already sent someone to reprimand him. Now, he absolutely dared not do anything against the rules to the fairy from Yaochi...
The Matchmaker was originally just a heavenly immortal, but he was one of the first batch of immortals to join the new Heavenly Court. He was upright and conscientious in his work, and was bestowed the position of Matchmaker by the Jade Emperor thousands of years ago.
After serving for thousands of years, the Matchmaker had experienced many benefits of this divine position, so he worked diligently and dared not slack off.
However, the problem was that nowadays, more and more heavenly immortals knew about the secret of the red strings, and knew that he, as the Matchmaker, could change them.
People would sneak into his Matchmaking Hall every few days...
Some were colleagues who couldn't avoid it due to face;
Some wanted to use gifts to obtain marriage, but the Matchmaker refused them all... What kind of gift was more valuable than the merits rewarded for serving in the Heavenly Court?
But there was also a situation that the Matchmaker could not refuse, and dared not refuse, which was the powerful and influential old Daoists, in front of whom his divine position was just a small heavenly immortal. For example...
"Master!"
Outside the hall, two attendants with braided hair and festive attire rushed in, shouting:
"The Grand Mage is here! He's arrived at the front of the hall!"
The Matchmaker's spirits lifted, and he quickly got up, heading towards the front of the hall.
This Grand Mage was an extraordinary figure, the only direct disciple of the Human Religion's Supreme Master. His cultivation was unfathomable, and he had Taiqing Laozi backing him up!
Because Laozi was the senior brother among the Three Clears, this Grand Mage, although he arrived at Kunlun Mountain's small courtyard later, was respected as a senior brother by Guangchengzi of the Interpretation Sect and Duobao Taoist of the Interception Sect.
The true eldest senior brother of the Daoist tradition.
The Grand Mage didn't have a clear title because Taiqing Laozi had not bestowed one, so as not to cause major karma; he was called the Grand Mage in the Taiqing Temple, and over time, this name was accepted—
The Grand Mage of Taiqing!
From then on, the name Taiqing could refer to this disciple of the Human Religion, and it also had a "place name" meaning.
The Matchmaker was very clear in his heart that this disciple of the Human Religion was completely different from the named disciples of Taiqing Laozi!
Because the Heavenly Court was just established and its strength was weak, the Grand Mage had also temporarily resided in the Douluo Palace...
After all, if there were some troublemakers like the Great Luo or Golden Immortals, it wouldn't be appropriate for the Holy Master to personally take action. Having the Grand Mage deal with it would be enough.
From beginning to end, this Grand Mage had also come to the Matchmaker's door several times, and the Matchmaker naturally understood what he was doing.
The Matchmaker hurried out of the hall, and saw a young Daoist floating on the clouds not far away.
This person wore a dark Daoist robe, with a face that was neither outstanding nor strange, yet extremely upright.
He stood tall and straight, his Daoist robe fluttering lightly. There were no ornaments or jade accessories on his body, but he gave people a sense of purity, which was the aura of someone with extremely high cultivation.
It was said that the Grand Mage was one of the first batch of humans in the world, born without parents, formed by Nuwa using soil, with a slight merit in creating humans, and also with the destiny of the Human Religion.
Before reaching the front of the hall, the Grand Mage clasped his hands in salute to the Matchmaker and smiled, "Is the Matchmaker doing well recently?"
"I'm doing well, I'm doing well."
The Matchmaker nodded repeatedly. If others didn't know, they would think that this Heavenly God was naturally hunched over.
"Master, please come in... same as last time?"
"Thank you, Matchmaker," the Grand Mage smiled warmly and walked straight into the Matchmaker's hall, following the Matchmaker into the rear hall.
Entering the rear hall, a mysterious starry sky lay ahead.
The Matchmaker held a potted plant and gently shook it. A beam of starlight flew from the starry sky and hovered in front of the two men.
This potted plant was actually a treasure of acquired merit—the Love Tree.
The starlight dimmed, dividing into five piles of clay figures, each of varying sizes with starlight forming various characters on them, categorized accordingly.
For instance, the leftmost pile bore three large characters: "Degree Immortal Gate."
The other piles were labeled with names like "Carefree Immortal Sect" and "Free Gate," representing the various Taoist lineages of the People's Teaching.
Xuandu sighed lightly, smiling, "How many have been formed over this millennium?"
The Matchmaker beside him bowed his head, "As you instructed, whenever a match is found, it is made. Over this millennium, a total of three hundred and sixty-two couples have been formed within these immortal sects."
Xuandu nodded gently, saying warmly, "Good, but how many new births are there?"
"That... You'd have to check the register at the underworld; we only handle the matches here."
Xuandu chuckled ruefully, his eyes squinting with a warm smile, "I forgot about that. Don't blame yourself, Matchmaker. Ah, the Master has really given me a difficult task, wanting the People's Teaching to prosper moderately yet not allowing me to take disciples..."
Xuandu sighed with his hands behind his back, scanning the surroundings, "We can only resort to this plan now. Matchmaker, could you bring out the recently formed matches? I want to see how many there are."
"Yes, Grand Master, please wait a moment."
The Matchmaker shook the bonsai tree in his hand, and soon dozens of clay figures flew forward. The distance between the clay figures varied according to their relationship closeness and the likelihood of forming a match. Each clay figure had one or two red strings, some even three or four, but not too many. Some strings were longer for deeper relationships, while others were shorter for less profound connections.
Soon, Xuandu's attention was drawn to four clay figures leaning together. He walked forward and examined the four under the "Degree Immortal Gate" inscription.
The Matchmaker chuckled, "This is a constellation of three stars with the moon, a sign of good fortune."
Xuandu nodded lightly, staring intently. The three clay figures in long skirts and clouds of hair surrounded one with long hair and robes. The red strings of the three clay figures had already extended inward, but the central one...
Hmm...
Xuandu frowned, "Why is his so short?"
"This one?" The Matchmaker leaned forward, staring at the male clay figure for a moment before saying, "It's indeed short, but it's there. Grand Master, look, there's a bit of red thread on his wrists and ankles; it's just that the red string has just formed... Some people are like this, undoubtedly this person is a virtuous talent of the People's Teaching, single-mindedly focused on cultivation and unwilling to be involved in worldly matters."
"What a waste," Xuandu said, looking at the three red strings floating around the clay figure, "Matchmaker, could you help him lengthen the red string so it can connect with the other three?"
"Well, that's possible, but Grand Master, we can only assist; it's not appropriate to force changes..."
"While letting nature take its course, a little assistance is appropriate."
"Sigh, I'll do it."
With that, the Matchmaker raised the bonsai tree and gently touched the clay figure. Meanwhile, in the alchemy room of the Little Qiong Peak in the Eastern Victory Divine Continent, Li Changshou, who had just taken a bath and was worrying about the new alchemy furnace, suddenly had some inappropriate images in his mind.
"Hmm?" Li Changshou chuckled and quickly dispelled the images from his mind.
In the rear hall of the Matchmaker's temple, as the bonsai tree gradually approached, the clay figure...
Took a step back.
"Huh?" The Matchmaker frowned, changed direction, and continued to poke the clay figure with the bonsai tree.
In the alchemy room of Little Qiong Peak, Li Changshou's mind was filled with images again, all of them involving reincarnation from past lives, like his junior martial brother wearing a sailor suit, his junior martial sister in school uniform, and even...
Uh, why was he imagining having Poison wearing a suit of armor?
"Strengthen the Dao heart, don't let illusions destroy it!"
The images in his mind shattered instantly, and Li Changshou shook his head, continuing to ponder the matter of the new alchemy furnace.
In the Matchmaker's temple, the clay figure reacted by gently twisting to the left.
"Hey, that's not what I meant!"
The Matchmaker's eyes widened, grabbing the bonsai tree and changing direction again, poking at the clay figure. This time, the clay figure...
Performed a backflip, skillfully dodging the attack.
"Hahaha!"
Beside him, Xuandu couldn't help but laugh out loud.
The Matchmaker's expression turned somewhat unpleasant. He had embarrassed himself in front of the Grand Master over such a trivial matter!
"Grand—"
The Matchmaker touched the bonsai tree, which instantly expanded, and the branches and leaves attacked the clay figure.
Li Changshou on the ground furrowed his brow, and in his mind, there appeared a beautiful alchemy furnace, which opened up, and several charming figures flew out...
Li Changshou sat down cross-legged directly, beginning to recite the mantra of calming the mind and condensing Qi.
Joking aside, what hadn't he seen in his past life?
Perhaps his mindset was unstable after becoming an immortal, causing him to always think of such things.
What use was temporary joy?
At least aim for longevity first, then consider these matters! That's what true shamelessness means!
No, longevity doesn't necessarily guarantee self-preservation... Better not to provoke fate, which is sometimes important, sometimes not.
Li Changshou shouted, "Calm!"
In the Matchmaker's temple, the clay figures instantly reacted.
Retreat...
Dodge...
Flip...
Sidestep...
Twist and turn...
Letting the bonsai tree's branches and leaves attack, not a single leaf touched them.
The Matchmaker was sweating profusely, almost choked by the backlash.
The Grand Master laughed, "Let me help you, Matchmaker."
With that, he conjured starlight in his left hand, blending Yin and Yang, and reached out towards the clay figure from a distance.
The Matchmaker widened his eyes, about to shout 'no,' but it was too late. The Grand Master had already grabbed the clay figure's left arm.
But...
Snap!
The clay figure's left arm was instantly broken, and the body agilely jumped out, then paused and even struck a pose of 'come at me.'
The entire scene fell silent.
"Grand Master... This can't, can't be forced..."
"Cough, can this be fixed?"
"It can, but it'll take a long time. Fortunately, there wasn't much red string on his left arm to begin with, so it'll be easier to repair..."
"Then I'll trouble the Matchmaker. Matchmaker, you're busy, I'll come back later with some elixirs refined by Laojun... Keep an eye on this guy, it's quite important!"
With that, the Grand Master hurriedly bowed and turned away. In just two steps, he disappeared, leaving the Matchmaker alone in a mess.
A moment ago, in the alchemy room of the Degree Immortal Gate...
Li Changshou frowned tightly, his mind in turmoil.
Helplessly shaking his head, he reached into his chest and took out one of his trump cards for calming his mind and regulating his Qi.
A scroll unfolded, revealing a row of delicately painted, heavily made-up, and brightly dressed... old women...
Li Changshou looked carefully, murmuring, "True love isn't just about admiring her youthful appearance; it's also about accepting her nagging in old age."
Instantly, the images in his mind shattered one by one, leaving him feeling at peace.
"But where did 'old age' come from in cultivating immortality?"
He smiled contentedly, putting away the precious "Hundred Beautiful Old Women Painting," feeling much calmer.
A man should be tough on himself.
Speaking of which, why did he occasionally think of his junior martial sister and junior martial brother? But why did he think of Poison?
Tsk, Poison.