Chapter 1 – A Tabby Cat

Destiny, fate or divine will, it doesn't matter what you desire to call it, it will not change itself but it will, without doubt, change you. It is woven into our lives carefully guiding us, like a step-by-step plan on how to live on. You are after all said to be the master of your own fate or was it the writer? I can't remember. Many believe that destiny is changeable as long as you are unaware of how it should go, but how to alter something you don't even know? Wouldn't you just uncover it, lift the vail, eradicate the smoke? Or are you like me, wondering if this so called red string of fate hasn't already been torn apart, by some random by-passer who stomped onto it, maybe even living with the superstition that it was ever so non-existent? Whatever it might be, dreaming about it seems to be futile, since it will in the very end get you nowhere, help you under no circumstances and bring you no guidance.

For me fate always seemed like something out of a novel, a piece of writing where the fate had already been predicted, happily ending with the last page. That's what made up the charm of these novels, you could skip or peek at the ending. Black ink spread over billions of letters, forming patterns, giving sense to them and completely stunning any individual that reads across them. But in reality destiny can find its way in the most bizarre ways, for example if you stand in a supermarket and decide to buy a package of MunchPaw cat food, even if you don't own a cat, simply because you liked the eye-catching design. Or it will present you with just your everyday life, like a well-paid job in a well-established office.

An office, a mundane every-day place, filled with the gargling of coffee makers, the hammering of the computer keys and the humming of the pc's. Desks cramped together in the same vast room, but each carefully separated through barriers, formed of concrete and cement. Then again those desks are adorned with post-its and other work notes, piles of papers and red or black folders. A crowd of people placed on seating elements, only half as comfortable as their own beds on which some of these bodies would be preferably right at this moment. And on each of them sitting. Any of these humans working on their assigned projects, just like ants in their colonies. 

But now at this dark hour this bustling place seems like it was almost fully abandoned, half of the workers had already left hours ago, only a few brave warriors were left on this harsh battlefield. Most had returned to their lovely homes to embrace their families and relatives. Some little ones were probably piercing the star studded sky with their glances, searching for an old man to come and bring some merriness into their homes in form of materialistic things. 

It was just a few hours ago that I was one of those ants working their lives away, in one of those buildings stretching towards the sky.

***

'Hello Jen! How is it going?', a kind woman with bright blue eyes and flawlessly styled hair, wearing a perfectly soft smile, exclaimed while gracefully approaching. 

'Hello Key' I mumbled nonchalant to her presence.

She hung onto the back of my chair slightly tilting it backwards, bent her head forth, stopping right next to mine. I felt her breath swishing past my ear, smelling like fresh peppermint. I didn't bother looking up but a cold chill ran down my spine. I bet my breath smells like garbage and foul food in comparison.

'And? Much work left?' she questioned in her usually sweet tone.

I could smell her perfume. It smelled like vanilla cupcakes with a faint tint of rose-oil. The fragrant was so calming, even after smelling it for the thousandth time. 

'Y'know. It usually never ends. But this time I am almost done. At this rate I'll get home early today!' I answered automatically without really noticing the distraction.

'You're lucky I have been stuffed with paperwork! I hate our workload!', Key complied in an annoyed but still gentle tone.

'You chose the job. So stop with the complaining!' 

She let out a loud sight and I paused the consistent typing of the letters in my document. My fingers were resting on the letters of the word gadget; the last word I was just about to formulate. They had gotten cold from all the writing; a fact I have failed to notice up till now. I slowly tilted my head upwards. Looking at the almost finished business proposal in front of me. 

'Do you need anything? Apart from a complete brain transplantation, that could help you actually do some work for once?' Of course, I only said the first part out loud, leaving the whole train of brain transplantation thoughts hidden from her. 

She stood up. Letting out a snicker. I turned around in my leather chair. Now facing her. She was dazzling like the sun. Her hair was neatly tied to a knot at the back of her head, my plain brown hair was loosely tied and even after brushing it looked like a bird's nest. She wore a white blouse and some skinny jeans with white stripes alternating with the black, or the other way around. Her posture was as straight as a stick and her eyes seemed to glister brightly like stars in the night sky. 

'Such a beauty… what a waste for her to work here…', I thought.

I was lost in her beauty. She looked around, smiling at everyone in the bleak office. I just stared, didn't really notice her face turning back to me.

'Do I have something on my face?' she asked.

'No! Sorry!' 

'Ah… It's fine! By the way…'

A pause.

'Could you…'

Another stop. Her eyes averted mine, glancing sideways. She bit her lip, fumbled on her finger before finally beginning to finish her sentence.

'Help me with my document? I just don't get it…' 

What? She wants my assistance? I would like to decline though. She should do her work on her own! Just thinking about it… Yes! That would be pleasure. 

 I made up my mind. Prepared to say no. 

"Of course! What can I help with?"

'WHAAAT??? That was not what I wanted to say!' 

"Wow! How great. I am sure it will take only a little of your time!" she replied delighted.

I stayed silent. Pondering deeply. Creating countless strategies to get out of this situation, like a mouse trying to find their way out of a maze that seemed to have no exit. 

'It's not like I don't want to lend her a helping hand… It's just, how do I put it, well she is not particularly the brightest candle on the cupcake. To put it plainly, she could be considered stupid by modern standards.'

Every time she came to this very desk it always went the same, like a play recorded and then acted out repeatedly. She'd ask me of something, saying it would be a small matter. Then I would agree to give my help, and suddenly it turns out to be a lot bigger and time consuming issue. 

'Ah! Actually I've been thinking… that maybe…' I began.

I let the sentence hanging in the air as I saw the gentle facial expression of my co-worker slightly turn stiff. Her eyes looked as if she was looking at trash to throw away, as if she had never seen me, as if we were strangers with nothing to share, to say or to express. 

'Excuse me missy? Am I hallucinating?' I'm sure she just smiled…' 

'Yes? Go on?' she went on.

Somehow a chill ran down my spine. Her tone seemed to be stoic. It was as if a completely different person stood there. The smile was still there, the posture looked elegant, nevertheless seemed somehow cold. 

'The heck? Has she always been like this? What is going on? … ? Wait, now is not the time, I will just tell her I just remembered a very important appointment. Yes, Yes! Very important appointment! Today, today after my work!' 

I clenched my fists, got up from my chair. 

"I am sorry. I have a very, you see, really very important appointment to catch. So I really have to rush my work, which hasn't been completed during the day." Please just bear with my sudden change of mind… don't be the annoying b!tch you usually are.' 

I folded my hands and slightly bowed my head, towards the floor, which was layered with dust. 

'Oh well, it can't be helped! I wish you a fast completion of your work.' She snarled.

I looked upwards with my eyes, plainly brown like acorns, and couldn't hide my enjoyment of seeing her leave in anger. I raised my upper body, that I lowered alongside my head, in order to return to my work. And thus flopping into my chair, which gave in slightly, softly bouncing back and then forth once again, and I grinned from ear to ear.

'Ok! I am fired up! Let's finish this stuff up!' 

I would have been finished by now if not for Miss Perfect. The clock had finished one circle when I exhaled and the dim light of my Pc diminished. I looked at how the monitor went dark, as if drained of life. I looked at the cold mug of coffee and the piled up files. 

'I swear; this will be my last day here!' I exhaled. 'I am so done!' 

My brain seemed to have partly shut down, as it became harder, with every passing second, to form any clear thought. As I swiftly looked around the vacant office, with tables, that were buzzling just hours before, I realised, for the first time, how many hours have passed. It was 1 a.m. on the point. 

'Even without extra work, it is late enough!'

I glanced back at the unfinished document, that was complicated to finish, even if you had five times the amount of time I was given. I blinked, my eye leads heavy. I proceeded to stand up, by placing my arms on the office chair, gently pressing my upper body upwards. My body felt heavy. 

'Ok… Let's go home!'

I grabbed my jacket, the cat-mug and my handbag. Then I went out the door. 

***

'Nothing would have been different, even if I had helped her …' I remembered how she had approached me today evening, at lunch and in the morning. 

'The morning-' My mouth formed a lopsided smile as I reminisced about this morning and my cheeks wrinkled. 'I Was so thrilled for the new volume, today the finale is out!' 

I quickened my step, only to pause at the next turn. 'But now my mood completely is soiled. I don't even want to walk to the bookstore. I guess they'd be closed anyway…'

Looking at the sky, I realised once again, that I was a hopeless weak-willed pushover.

'The sky… Its grey.'

I lived in a big city, where buildings would tower up to the sky. The lights of the windows and advertising boards would outshine every star. My heart could flutter if I'd see these stars. 

I remember the day my mother held me in her arms, reading me a beautiful story about a little star, which fell down from the sky. The artist had used little white crystals to highlight the beauty of stars. 

'Once you grow up, once we have enough money, I will take you to a trip and we will look into the sky together. Enjoying the stars, which will shimmer and shine brighter than the purest diamonds.', my mother always remembered me.

'How long has it been? 2 years?' I wondered.

She loved the sky adorned with its many crystals. Sadly, she passed away two years later in an unfortunate car accident, leaving me behind. Since then, I have lived on my own in an orphanage, that was well off until I turned 18 last year. Under their care and guidance, I grew up to be a fairly ordinary adult, with a degree in computer technology. 

'Sometimes I wish for you, mother, to be here.'

I stood there, motion-less, probably for several minutes straight. Then I sat down on the stony concrete. I rummaged through my bag, which I always carry around without any exception. I pulled a book out. It was the second volume of an Empress' Saga, just published. Wind blew through my hair, as I opened the first page of my book. 

'I wished, that was my life… It all seems so flawlessly beautiful. No stress, no burdens, no taxes, no social conventions. Everything seems perfect.'

I had just finished the first volume, a true masterpiece. I had to laugh, the plot had been just so good.

I was so engrossed in my book that I didn't notice the faint footsteps echoing on the concrete. I flipped the page. 

'MEOW!'

I stopped. Looked around. And then I saw a little kitten cowering next to me. 

'What a sweet tabby cat you are! But how can your owner let you out under such weather conditions? What a careless person!'

'MEOW!'

The cat stretched its mouth wide open, tiny white teeth flashing up, as sharp as the thorns of a rose.

'Aww! I should call you tiger!' 

I giggled. With the cats perfectly coloured fur and sharp teeth it was the epitome of a tiger, only a bit smaller. 

'MEOW!'

I closed my book, sliding it into in my backpack. I rummaged through it, trying to find something.

'I know I have it with me, it should be somewhere around here. Ah! There we go!'

I pulled my hand out of the backpack, simultaneously the cat flinched like someone who was about to get hit. 

'Sorry little one. I didn't mean to scare you.'

In my hand I had a package of MunchPaw, cat food that I had bought even if I never owned a cat, solely because I liked the playful bubbly design and had a couple bucks to spare.

'Here have some of it, it will not hurt you! It tastes great!'

I teared open the package lid and slowly stretched my hand towards the little cat. As careful as if I was balancing glass.

The tabby cat fixed its eyes on the package, its pitch black button-eyes were unmoving, which silently laid atmosphere of anticipation. Both of our eyes were starring, the moment in loss of the slightest movement. A cold air breezed by my hair, which fluttered in the wind only to get even more dishevelled. Slowly the cat began to move its muscles, it set its tiny paw front. One after another, each at its time, with every stem my heart flushed with a feeling of warmth.

'How can any living being be so adorable? It's a shame to leave it in such harsh weather conditions. Soon everything is going to get cold, the streets will get powdered and the air will get chilly.' 

The cat was only a few centimetres away from the package. What were seconds felt like hours for myself., It seemed as if the cat's eyes were staring deeply into the abyss of my soul, the air seemed chillier, as if winter had arrived at this very moment. 

The majestic cat moved forward, now standing in front of my hand. Somehow the cat seemed different. It seemed unfamiliar, as if I had lost some kind of connection that had tied me to this world before. At the next moment the cat proceeded to feed on the package. I saw her tongue licking out the scraps of the food from the plastic foil package. I extended my hand, eager to touch the beautifully shining fur, which bend in the soft breeze like weeds on a windy day. The cat who was finished with the package curled up and I ran my hand through the fur, absorbing the warmth of its delicate body. 

Suddenly the cat jumped toward the street, which took me aback and this caused me to retrieve my hand. In the blink of an eye a series of events seemed to occur, overlapping themselves in one second then ending in the next. My body seemed to move on its own, I stood up grabbed the cat, simultaneously a black clothed man came running out of the alley. Strongly bumping into me. Roughly pushing me, and causing me to stumble. My world turned around, as the ground came nearer every blink. I fell head-forward onto the cold stony pavement. In order to avoid this, I had swiftly clenched my eyes, but even though the pain still spread through my whole body. 

As I was carefully opening my eyes, I somehow noticed that there was a warm and wet feeling on the skin of my head, it seemed to spread wider with every second. I hardly noticed how a crimson-coloured puddle formed in front of my face, because from my own tears blurred vison. Still the stench of the all too familiar liquid quickly penetrated my nose trills, it smelled like iron and salt. In a moment I realised what this horrible substance was, and due to that my body started shivering, my stomach twisted and I felt more and more nauseous with every passing moment. Even with this terrifying pain, as if someone was piercing through me with thousandths of needles, it still seemed strangely unfamiliar, somehow unconnected to myself. 

I became calm, with nothing to worry. It was as if fate was finally setting the score, an eye for an eye, a life for a life. 

'As if my happiness here could have ever lasted.' I thought as I proceeded to slowly close my hazelnut brown eyes, faintly perceiving the tabby cat starring upon me. In this black eyes I finally saw it, there was a reflection. A beautifully spitting image of the most beautiful star studded sky. 

And that was the last scenery I got to enjoy before, my body gave in and I closed my eyes, wrapping myself in complete darkness.